The Song Fight Bulletin Board

Inflatable Vegetables [unlikely to get recorded in time]

After posing many hours
Whistler's mom felt tense
Tired of the smell of paint
She decided to blow his inheritance

Traded in her wooden chair
And bought a Sprinter van
Heading west on Trans-Canada
Turns and she looks for a place to camp

She hasn't felt so free in years
Shifting down to lower gears
Riding through rocky meadows crazy with
Wild roses, lupin and Shasta daisies

She wants to sing
But she's concentrating
So she starts whistling
Whistler's mother whistling in Whistler

Changes from her woolen dress
She rents a mountain bike
Thunders down the twisty trails
Through the towering pines and the alpine lakes

PC CH

She hits the spa, gets a massage
Buys some clothes at TNA
Goes on a pub crawl, checks out the bars
Staggers back to the van, stares at the stars

[whistle solo over chorus]
Whistler's mother whistling in Whistler
Whistler's mother whistling in Whistler

The Whistler - Paco del Stinko

Yeah he could whistle
From his butt
And if you listen
I'll tell you what

He could pucker
And he could blow
If you were lucky
You saw the show

You never heard a more gorgeous tune (A gorgeous tune)
Than when he whistled - Under the moon

The crowds he captured
From all around
Were held in rapture
By his gassy sound

Like an angel - He could sing
Flying high - On the wind

A bad bowl of chilli
He couldn't mend
Unable and unwilling
It all came to an end

The Whistler by Elephant Finger

Yes, I don’t exist
But also I do
Both at the same time
Yes boy it is true.

Don't ask me if I win
All you’ll hear is whistling

Of course I am not real
But - surprise! - I am
If I wasn’t real
Would I have a plan

So cunning and bright
To escape this box,
Get free from this life
Surrounded by you cocks?

Don't ask me if I win
All you’ll hear is whistling

Lied to you before -
I don’t have a plan
I am just a man
I am not a man

Don't ask me if I win
All you’ll hear is whistling

All you’ll hear is whistling

The Whistler
The Pannacotta Army


The Whistler hung on the wall
For us to behold
Falling out of the sky
All black and gold

Dressed in white lace
Draped on the couch
Butter would not melt in her mouth

The Whistler hung on the wall
It was grey and black
Staring into nowhere
Hands in her lap

Sailing away
Into the mist
Is it so hard to imagine this?

Those academic fools
They’re making their own rules

Around and around we go
Around and around we go

The Mellfire Trifecta

He won’t police himself, always cuts loose
It’s more than an impulse, it’s downright obsessive
Kills his relationships, freezes out options
It only brings trouble, obscuring the truth

They call him the whistler – if they call him at all
He doesn’t flinch, won’t come in from the cold
He’s not into stopping, he’s programmed to go
But this can’t continue, the hammer will fall

Covert meetings, whispered conversations
Others are watching, justice ain’t sleeping

The tracks he’d hidden are slightly uncovered
The harder he runs, the deeper his imprint
Darkness was his friend, saved him from harm
Now it’s last thing he’ll see as he’s smothered

How much does he know?
Enough to cut a deal?
Which cards should he show?
Who can protect him when he’s not even there?

Covert meetings, whispered conversations
Others are watching, justice ain’t sleeping

The Whistler
Pigfarmer Jr

They call me the whistler
Because I whistle while I work
They call me the whistler
Because I whistle while I work
I'm the worst damn whistler
That you've ever heard

They call me the whistler
Because I whistle in the wind
They call me the whistler
Because I whistle in the wind
I must be the worst damn whistler
Ooh, that there's ever been

The Whistler
Prill Phuner

Have you ever tried to whistle from the hole that's not your mouth
Pucker up your cheeks and just blow some air right out

It's a butt whistle you can do it too
Look at me whistling different than you
Whistle out your butt it's a real fun thing to do
Because when you can't whistle out your mouth you have to make due

Now you've got the basics and it's on to step 2
Convince all your friends to butt whistle with you
Whistling out your butt is an easy thing to do
but it's even easier when you do it in a group

It's a butt whistle
It's good for the soul
At least that's what
My teacher told me
When I was 4 years old

Here's where it gets complicated on to step 3
Go crash the parties of the corporate elite
Butt whistle inside their homes until they scream
Take the poo out of potpourri

Butt whistling please pick up on me
Whistle out your butt so effortlessly
It might smell but that won't matter when it sounds heavenly

The Whistler
Yaks of the Industry

Arrange me in black and gray
A memory when you’re barely away
A faded picture in a broken frame
Time for you to forget my name

Interruption from the past
A sound that brings you back
Your memories will disappear
When the whistler fades to black

In the end we all fade away
Just hope you live to be old and gray
A life you live with the best intentions
Staying cool while holding tensions

Interruption from the past
A sound that brings you back
Your memories will disappear
When the whistler fades to black

A lone high tone from between my lips
Slides between notes like a quick eclipse
The sun fades down into the horizon
I crescendo as the moon is rising

Interruption from the past
A sound that brings you back
Your memories will disappear
When the whistler fades to black

Interruption from the past
A sound that brings you back
Your memories will disappear
When the whistler fades to black