Goofy question

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Smalltown Mike
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Goofy question

Post by Smalltown Mike »

A friend of mine donated money to a musician (we'll call the musician "X") on the internet. X said he was collecting donations to do a gig in a different city; my friend kicked in $20.

So the guy never did the gig after collecting the donations, so my friend asked for his money back. X said he'd send him one of his CDs instead; my friend accepted this new proposal, but the CD never came. This was a couple years ago.

So what should he do? Should he just keep bugging this guy for the $20, or should he just walk away? Yea, I know, not a ton of money, and my friend has probably learned not to give money to strangers on the internet. But still?
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Re: Goofy question

Post by jb »

Life's too short. Walk away, lesson learned, and find something that makes you happy to focus your energy on.

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Re: Goofy question

Post by Caravan Ray »

What's his email address? I need $20.
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Re: Goofy question

Post by Smalltown Mike »

Yea—I didn't say he was smart. I just ... well.
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Re: Goofy question

Post by Billy's Little Trip »

I agree, just move on. I know it's about principle, but sometimes you just have to pick your battles and this one sounds like one not worth pursuing. If this was a onetime screw up from the musician, then he probably won't make such ambiguous plans again. If the guy is in fact a scam artist, then he'll get it in the ass sooner or later.
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Re: Goofy question

Post by tonetripper »

jb wrote:Life's too short. Walk away, lesson learned, and find something that makes you happy to focus your energy on.

JB
Is it really?! 20 bucks is 20 bucks. If it's going to a good cause then sure it's wonderful to give but when fraudulent actions take place how can anyone, really, let it go. If I give some store clerk 20 bucks by accident, he knows it, puts it in the till knowing full well that there's been a 20 dollar overage, won't you ask for your money back? And when he plays ignorant and you know it by looking into his scheming eyes do you let it go and say to yourself "Life's too short"?!

On some minor issues life is too short like a coffee stain on a shirt or getting a parking ticket, but the lesson learned from this is to not trust humanity especially in concerns to communities on the internet and that, in my fired opinion, sucks. I just think that after a certain point it's up to a certain person to own up to the issue, resolve it and lick their embarrassed wounds and pay the money back by whatever means or at least say "you know when we meet I will get you nice and loaded". That would be the cool thing to do. Not shying away from it and tucking it under the rug, pretending like it didn't happen. My only beef is how many other people got roped into it. 20 bucks could have turned into a lot more.

I wonder how many other people of the community said, "They're not going to pay it back. Life's too short. Walk away, lesson learned. Why not find something else to focus my energy on." Whatever. The person responsible should take ownership of it and resolve it with the person(s) who got roped. That would be the cool thing to do.

:roll:
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Re: Goofy question

Post by Billy's Little Trip »

Life is a gamble. Every loss makes you more skeptical and every win makes you want to gamble more.
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Re: Goofy question

Post by Lord of Oats »

Billy's Little Trip wrote:sometimes you just have to pick your battles
When given the choice, I pick all of my battles.
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Re: Goofy question

Post by frankie big face »

tonetripper wrote: On some minor issues life is too short like a coffee stain on a shirt or getting a parking ticket, but the lesson learned from this is to not trust humanity especially in concerns to communities on the internet and that, in my fired opinion, sucks.
Unless you're buying your shirts at, I don't know, Wal-mart or the equivalent, these are both equally, if not more, expensive lessons. The difference is, there is actually something you can do about both of these things. A dry-cleaner (or you!) may be able to get that stain out and there is a parking authority where you can plead your case if you think the ticket was issued in error. Shouting at people on the internet doesn't usually result in much success. And pursuing it legally will cost way more in time and money than it is worth. (Ask that guy who is trying to get in touch with Bryan Farrish!)

The lesson learned here is not "(don't) trust humanity." It's don't trust that one guy on the internet. It doesn't have to extend to the entire internet community unless you (or the victim in this case) let it. Maybe he should go find someone else to send $20 to and see what happens. I've had very few negative experiences regarding money on the internet and most of my big investments (e.g. flying to San Francisco seven years ago to play music with some guys I met on SongFight) have paid off big-time.

(Also, watch your split infinitives.)
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Re: Goofy question

Post by jb »

tonetripper wrote:Is it really?! 20 bucks is 20 bucks. If it's going to a good cause then sure it's wonderful to give but when fraudulent actions take place how can anyone, really, let it go.
I dunno man, how much time is it worth expending on retrieving those twenty bucks? After you've taken the time to say "hey, you didn't do the album, can I have my money back?" and after "Hey, you never sent the album you said you were gonna" and do that like, a couple more times before the guy stops responding, what's next? Make a "____ Sucks" Web site? Track the guy down at his house and go all "Better Off Dead" on him, chasing after him on your Schwinn shouting "I want my twenty dollars" before ultimately riding off the side of a mountain?

I sure don't advocate giving $20 to somebody and then just shrugging and walking away if they don't come up with the goods, but there's a definite limit to how far one should go to retrieve a sum of money, and it differs depending on the amount. For $20 I think your friend has gone far enough, from your description of the matter, and needs to let it go so he can stop thinking about the injustice of it and go enjoy something for a change.

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Re: Goofy question

Post by Billy's Little Trip »

Lord of Oats wrote:
Billy's Little Trip wrote:sometimes you just have to pick your battles
When given the choice, I pick all of my battles.
Give me an example of when you don't have a choice. :wink:
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Re: Goofy question

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After the meds kick in.
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Re: Goofy question

Post by erik »

tonetripper wrote:I just think that after a certain point it's up to a certain person to own up to the issue, resolve it and lick their embarrassed wounds and pay the money back by whatever means or at least say "you know when we meet I will get you nice and loaded". That would be the cool thing to do.
It would be really nice if that guy did that. But it's very clear that's never, ever going to happen. What is the point of continuing to ask for money that you're never going to get? Especially via email, where it's more than likely that the guy has already been blacklisted and he's not even reading the emails anymore?

It would make me frustrated and give me a sense of false hope to send out email after email. My time and my peace of mind are worth more than $20.
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Re: Goofy question

Post by Smalltown Mike »

I didn't mean to make it sound like my friend is stressing about it. I sometimes ask him if he ever saw a CD or his $20 back, but it's not like HE brings it up.

Not a big deal, for sure.
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Re: Goofy question

Post by tonetripper »

frankie big face wrote: (Also, watch your split infinitives.)
..... wait a sec here :D ..... are you gonna bust me for the lack of comma usage in my posts?... or does this mean that I tell you to boldly go where no one has gone before?



..... I could assume such rhetoric might be construed as some meaningless ends to some sort of condescending public pedantic jabbing about my usage of grammar in the English language; to, perhaps, demean on some level for reasons to gain personal public esteem...... or I could consider it as a strange ass licking of one's English Professor for the sake of condescending pedantic jabbing about my usage of grammar in the English language; to, perhaps, demean on some level for the sake of personal public esteem.


Either way; couldn't one assume poetic license?! :twisted:
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Re: Goofy question

Post by Rabid Garfunkel »

Tone! How goes the roving audio-guy gig?
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