Do you realize there are (Something's Wrong Reviews)

Discuss upcoming, current, and previous song fights.
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crumpart
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Re: Do you realize there are (Something's Wrong Reviews)

Post by crumpart »

owl wrote:
Thu Jan 23, 2020 9:40 am
crumpart wrote:
Thu Jan 23, 2020 9:09 am
owl wrote:
Thu Jan 23, 2020 8:57 am


Nice! That makes me happy, well done.
Oh shit. This was one of my favourite songs from the fight also and I’d never heard of that ad. Way to make me feel the feelings!

This seems like a good moment to say my Pocket Full of Bones song was about a very different ad from my childhood. https://youtu.be/ogZ3dyW8Gro
Because of the accent, I kept hearing "one on the boob" lol. I think that makes it better.
(Also, what kind of overalls only have one pocket in front and back?! I guess "five pockets" doesn't sound as good/seem as godly as three?)
Anyway I will have to go back and check out your Pocket Full of Bones entry in light of that, as I don't remember it off the top of my head.
The girl singing in the ad eventually left Australia and became an extremely successful opera soprano. I’m about six weeks older than her. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Danielle_de_Niese
Devil’s got me Lindt! Devil’s got me Lindt!
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Re: Do you realize there are (Something's Wrong Reviews)

Post by gizo »

So look apart from one day of glorious rehearsals with my old band this month has been pretty bloody awful and doesn't look to be improving so I haven't much to say about songs but these entries.

Apologies to those not mentioned, it's not you it's me.

Crumpet - this is too close to home. I'll see you soon and we can mourn together.

Owl - Having not read any lyrics, reviews, or commentary I really appreciated the tone of your chorus. It felt like you were perhaps the only entry who took 'Something's Wrong' and turned it into a message of hope and optimism. The shift in key and the chorus melody in general are wonderful and uplifting and just thank you for this.

Vom - You get a vote. On my little car speak it sounds like you've happily emphasized the sibilants on your lisp, and I like it. Your chorus sits right in my zone, lyrically and melodically. That forlorn optimism, that sad hope. I like this very much, I'll be singing this chorus for a long time, perhaps until it's too late.
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Re: Do you realize there are (Something's Wrong Reviews)

Post by owl »

gizo wrote:
Thu Jan 23, 2020 3:16 pm
Owl ...a message of hope and optimism...
oh dear, I have bad news for you... but it can wait. Read the lyrics later. Or maybe never. :)

I hope your month gets better!
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Re: Do you realize there are (Something's Wrong Reviews)

Post by crumpart »

Off to record my song for The Dregs, which is possibly, maybe, perhaps a little more hopeful than my lament for Something’s Wrong. Kinda. Anyway, here’s the video I made for this one, because I knew people on my socials would actually listen to it this time and I didn’t want them to ragevote.

Devil’s got me Lindt! Devil’s got me Lindt!
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Re: Do you realize there are (Something's Wrong Reviews)

Post by owl »

Really enjoyed the video! I wouldn't have thought watching lyrics being written out would be that interesting, but it was.
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Re: Do you realize there are (Something's Wrong Reviews)

Post by Geoff WreckdoM »

owl wrote:
Tue Jan 21, 2020 11:52 am
thank you to WreckdoM for writing a song about the CATS movie, the arrangement is a little fatiguing to listen to tbh but the lyrics brought me great pleasure.
You're welcome! I was hoping someone would catch it, thought the 100 million bucks line was the clincher. I have now posted the lyrics, and for further reference, separated them into two parts. The first part was written before I had seen Cats (and I've never seen the musical or listened to it's songs). While we were working on the song, I let the guys know I planned to see Cats on acid the next day, that I had kinda just hatched this crazy scheme earlier that day and it was coming together. We decided the lyrics would be about Cats. That's as far as I got that night. The second half of the lyrics I wrote a day or two after I saw Cats on acid while we working on the song again. So the music was written sans lyrics and more or less completed by the time I recorded vocals and Theremin. I am glad I have this song now to forever remind me of this odd thing I did, even though there was scant chance I'd forget otherwise.
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Re: Do you realize there are (Something's Wrong Reviews)

Post by Adnama17 »

Æpplês&vØdkã wrote:
Mon Jan 20, 2020 4:38 pm
The first set of reviews of mine. The reviewer is my wife, who doesn't really want to listen to music right now. These reviews consist almost solely of the length of time it took her to ask to change the song to the next one. If you aren't mention, assume she didn't ask to change the song. At many points during this process, she was being distracted by our children while we worked on a kindergarten art project.

Berkeley Social Scene - 0:10
Brown Word And The Big Whine - 0:17
Evil Grin - 1:19
Glenn Case - 100%
Glennny - :39
Hot Pink Halo - 0:09
Ken’s Super Duper Band n’ Stuff - “Are you Michael Stipe?” 2:20
Metavox - 0:23
Pigfarmer JR - 1:45
Travels With Brindle - 1:20
Vom Vorton - 0:20
WreckdoM - 0:23
We made it over half way! I'll take it!!! :D
Kindergarten art is the best!!!
And now it seems to me the beautiful uncut hair of graves -Walt Whitman
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Adnama17
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Re: Do you realize there are (Something's Wrong Reviews)

Post by Adnama17 »

owl wrote:
Tue Jan 21, 2020 4:24 pm
medavox wrote:
Tue Jan 21, 2020 3:56 pm
owl wrote:
Tue Jan 21, 2020 11:52 am
Also, thank you to WreckdoM for writing a song about the CATS movie, the arrangement is a little fatiguing to listen to tbh but the lyrics brought me great pleasure.
I had no idea whatsoever what was tying all these hilariously weird phrases together! But then I've still not gotten around to seeing any version of Cats.

Any recommendations for a particular production? I like musicals generally, particularly funny ones. My favourite is the 2007 Hairspray film.
Off the top of my head, Rent, the Producers, Wicked, Rock of Ages (although it's kinda cheesy), the Book of Mormon (hilarious, unless you're Mormon, in which case I apologize profusely), Oklahoma, Newsies, Ain't Misbehavin', Chicago, a Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum, Cabaret, and of course the classics, Phantom, Les Mis, West Side Story. Never been a fan of Cats. I haven't seen Hamilton yet, but I hear very good things. Not all these are funny, but good none the less. :D
And now it seems to me the beautiful uncut hair of graves -Walt Whitman
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Re: Do you realize there are (Something's Wrong Reviews)

Post by Adnama17 »

owl wrote:
Wed Jan 22, 2020 10:39 pm

Evil Grin: I love the sound of this song--the arrangement, performances, mix are all just really lovely. I think it's maybe my favorite Evil Grin song to date. That first dropout to just smoky vox and piano with the build back up to drums + guitar is really effective, and I think in general it's just really tastefully done, no excess noodling or theatrics, tastefully deployed harmonies and guitar textures. There are some moments of the "so alive" vocals that sound a little unnaturally tuned to me... might just be hearing things, though. The vocal climb to that last, high "desperately need you now" with a slightly thinner timbre has a lot of emotional impact--I love the way this ends. The lyrics are simple, but they work for me (although I didn't love the way "better" was emphasized at about 30 seconds in). Anyway, it hit the spot musically for me this week, one of my favorites of this fight as I mentioned before!
Thanks so much! No, you aren't hearing things. PFJ had to work some of his post production magic on my vox in spots. I really need to sing more, keep the muscles in shape and all that. And I didn't notice I emphasized "better" in that spot at all. Guess I better listen again. Sometimes, you just stop hearing things after awhile, know what I mean? And usually they are the things you need to hear. Hahaha! <3
And now it seems to me the beautiful uncut hair of graves -Walt Whitman
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Re: Do you realize there are (Something's Wrong Reviews)

Post by Adnama17 »

Totally wish I could hang out and comment more. I've listened though, and my conclusion? You're all fucking awesome in one way or another. See you in February!
And now it seems to me the beautiful uncut hair of graves -Walt Whitman
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Re: Do you realize there are (Something's Wrong Reviews)

Post by owl »

Geoff WreckdoM wrote:
Sat Jan 25, 2020 5:40 pm
owl wrote:
Tue Jan 21, 2020 11:52 am
thank you to WreckdoM for writing a song about the CATS movie, the arrangement is a little fatiguing to listen to tbh but the lyrics brought me great pleasure.
You're welcome! I was hoping someone would catch it, thought the 100 million bucks line was the clincher. I have now posted the lyrics, and for further reference, separated them into two parts. The first part was written before I had seen Cats (and I've never seen the musical or listened to it's songs). While we were working on the song, I let the guys know I planned to see Cats on acid the next day, that I had kinda just hatched this crazy scheme earlier that day and it was coming together. We decided the lyrics would be about Cats. That's as far as I got that night. The second half of the lyrics I wrote a day or two after I saw Cats on acid while we working on the song again. So the music was written sans lyrics and more or less completed by the time I recorded vocals and Theremin. I am glad I have this song now to forever remind me of this odd thing I did, even though there was scant chance I'd forget otherwise.
The 100 million bucks line was actually one that I totally didn't notice! I thought the first few lines were a dead giveaway, though. Thanks for posting the lyrics! How was the movie on acid? I bet it was amazing! I bet it was redundant.

Vom and I are working on a new song and he said I wasn't allowed to make the lyrics about CATS :(
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Re: Do you realize there are (Something's Wrong Reviews)

Post by owl »

Adnama17 wrote:
Sat Jan 25, 2020 7:13 pm
Thanks so much! No, you aren't hearing things. PFJ had to work some of his post production magic on my vox in spots. I really need to sing more, keep the muscles in shape and all that. And I didn't notice I emphasized "better" in that spot at all. Guess I better listen again. Sometimes, you just stop hearing things after awhile, know what I mean? And usually they are the things you need to hear. Hahaha! <3
Glad I'm not just making it up, sometimes I comment about stuff and I'm afraid it's all in my head. I generally despise audible autotune (except Cher, she gets a free pass) so I think I'm just extra sensitive about it... the attack on it in that spot might be a little fast, or it's a little too strong or something. Anyway, I think your vocals always sound pretty great, tuning or no :)
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Re: Do you realize there are (Something's Wrong Reviews)

Post by owl »

oops, double post
Last edited by owl on Sun Jan 26, 2020 8:35 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Do you realize there are (Something's Wrong Reviews)

Post by vowlvom »

Thanks for the reviews, everyone! Apart from this one...
Æpplês&vØdkã wrote:
Mon Jan 20, 2020 4:38 pm
Vom Vorton - 0:20
...which really made me think "what's the fucking point?" and sent me off into a bit of a miserable sulk for a while there. I don't check my bandcamp stats for the same reason! I can take a bad review but "didn't get more than a few seconds in"... ughhh

Anyway I thought this was a pretty strong fight, enjoyed Glenn Case's song (apart from that savage ending!), Medavox charmed me despite some very sloppy vocal layering on the first verse, and I enjoyed ShoehornTC as usual. Misc. Owl's song blew everything out of the water for me though, incredibly strong even by her high standards.
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Re: Do you realize there are (Something's Wrong Reviews)

Post by Æpplês&vØdkã »

vowlvom wrote:
Sun Jan 26, 2020 5:37 am
Thanks for the reviews, everyone! Apart from this one...
Æpplês&vØdkã wrote:
Mon Jan 20, 2020 4:38 pm
Vom Vorton - 0:20
...which really made me think "what's the fucking point?" and sent me off into a bit of a miserable sulk for a while there. I don't check my bandcamp stats for the same reason! I can take a bad review but "didn't get more than a few seconds in"... ughhh

Anyway I thought this was a pretty strong fight, enjoyed Glenn Case's song (apart from that savage ending!), Medavox charmed me despite some very sloppy vocal layering on the first verse, and I enjoyed ShoehornTC as usual. Misc. Owl's song blew everything out of the water for me though, incredibly strong even by her high standards.
As a bystander: she was just wanting me to quit playing music by that point and if she didn't dig the intro she'd give a "next". Don't worry, you're hardly the only person who got that treatment. I've gotten it myself on a number of occasions (she didn't like much of anything I put out in 2018). I think your short runtime in that case was pretty much a casualty of being alphabetically at the end. Don't fret too much, I'll give you a proper review from someone who cares more here in a bit!
I'm afraid this one fails on pretty much every level for me. - Jim of Seattle

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Re: Do you realize there are (Something's Wrong Reviews)

Post by Æpplês&vØdkã »

First off: apologies about the earlier set of reviews. You all deserve much more helpful reviews, and I should probably not make Ms. Phlebia listen to an online songwriting contest when she really just wants me to turn the stereo off in general. I swear, she’s actually a lovely person, just...probably not someone to solicit reviews from while trying to focus on something else. Oh well, it was meant to be lighthearted, not hurtful. But apparently I missed the mark. Oops.

So here’s my actual, hopefully helpful reviews!

I’m going to try to shoehorn[TC] the title into each of these, so if it mean’s something’s wrong with my phrasing at some point, then humor me.

Berkeley Social Scene:
First thought is that the vocals are kind of pitchy. I don’t know why but that bothers me FAR more when it’s the very opening line of the song rather than being pitchy later in the song. First impressions, all that stuff. Other than that, I find this song pretty catchy for the most part. The drums sound a little flat in my opinion from a recording standpoint, but the melodies are good! I’m not sold on the “I wanted to show you” part, something’s wrong with that chord shift. I dig that delayed out guitar in the break before the final chorus.

Brown Word and the Big Whine:

Drums too quiet! Turn them up! I’m not sure if you’re familiar with Strong Bad, but I want to describe them with “broodlebroodlebrapbroodlebrap” as is done in the death metal episode. Not that this remotely similar to death metal, more of a hard rock kind of number. But that’s fine. Mixing wise I’d want to slap just a LITTLE bit of reverb on them so they sit better in the mix? You might not want to listen to me there, owl and crump have told me over and over they can never make out what I’m saying. Anyway, the palm muted riffing near the end is pretty good sounding, but then it just...ends? I don’t know, there's something wrong with that conclusion. The distortion is kind of tinny. I always end up pointing out sonic gripes rather than songwriting gripes, but production is half the song so it is what it is.

Evil Grin:

This is the first entry of yours that I’ve never noticed pitch correction in. I can pick it out on a couple of occasions in the first few verses, but it’s especially apparent in that part where you start going “so alive, so aliiiiv[robot]e”. I feel like its obviousness there is doing the song a bit of a disservice. But it’s subtle and makes the parts where it’s applied subtly sound better. Maybe use the dry vocal there and only swap in the corrected one in the places where it’s really needed? Unless you completely flubbed the high part, but you usually don’t have many issues with pitch, so I’m assuming it’s just overapplication. Besides that? Piano sounds well recorded, the songs got this great vibe to it, and I actually really liked this one...or else I’d say there was something wrong with it beyond just griping about melodyne/newtone/however you did it.

Glenn Case:
Something’s wrong with the ending of this song. It just ends abruptly, and I want it to keep going because I really like this song. Those guitars are so thick and I always like your chord choices. I think it’s because you’re extremely fond of 9ths and jazzy chords, which is a trait that I share. Of course I find there to be an inherent irony in having a botched ending in a song with a song with a title like this. I enjoyed the line about the paranoia setting in. And the solo is delightful, as well as the abrupt shifts in time signature throughout the tune.

Glennny:
I know that sometimes there’s things that are completely unrelated, but the “hoo-hoo!” bit reminds me of Boris’s track Statement. But, y’know, that’s like sludgy alt-metal, and this clearly isn’t. During the pre-chorus bit (when the ground shakes), I wish the guitars were just a little bit louder in the mix, but man, I like the majority of this track! Something’s wrong on the “possible connection” line cause it’s a bit pitchy, but the rest of the song is fine so whatever! I dig the talkbox solo a lot. I’m a sucker for slide guitar, despite never using it in my own tracks (almost did this week, but...didn’t). Anyway, I’m never quite sure how to make slide guitar sound expressive, since the lack of fretting nuance is there. But again -- I love it! Good song, one of my favorites so far. What’s with the Glenns ending abruptly though?

Hot Pink Halo:

Back in the late 00s I was hanging out at this hippie dippie college in western North Carolina (Warren Wilson, if anyone knows where it is). They had this “free store”, where people would basically drop stuff off, with the condition being “leave something, take something”. I don’t remember what I left, but I would up picking up some random cassette tape of vaguely political folk tunes. And the general vibe of it sounded a whole lot like this, so naturally this ends up bringing in a pretty significant bit of nostalgia. Your vocals are way stronger than usual on this one - “my country is burning” when you reach up for those high notes is great! And your guitar is noticeably a lot clearer in the mix, which addresses something that I’ve alternately liked and complained about in my past reviews (helpful, right?). I feel like I have to say something’s wrong with this, and so I’m going to point out that the first violin note sounded a little flat or sharp and there’s some wobbliness in the violin technique. But you say you’ve just started picking it up after years and violin is hard, man! I’m guilty of pitch correcting my own violin playing, so I can’t even complain. This is the best Hot Pink Halo song.

Ken's Super Duper Band 'n Stuff:

In one of the rare comments of hers beyond “eh, no, next one”, Mrs. Phlebia pointed out this this sounds a lot like REM. I’m not sure if it’s the vocal stylings or the actual tone of your voice (a bit of each one). Despite it sounding sonically solid, it doesn’t stick with me at all for whatever reason. One of those that I hear and then find myself just thinking “hmm, that was a song”. I think it’s the relative lack of range in the melody, which only bothers me depending on the genre. Since the backing track of this is relatively static, it makes me feel like something’s wrong when the constant 8th note guitar strumming, static drums with not very many fills, and bass that just plays the tonic is accompanied by such a narrow melodic range. I mean it kind of breaks out of the monotony in the 3rd verse. I like the organ, though. Turn it up.

Medavox:

I’m torn on the multitracked vocals, in some ways it sounds like something's wrong with the recording and it's really cluttered, but the enthusiastic delivery of the melody combined with the slight quirkiness to the instrumentation and the lyrics sort of gives me Jeff Magnum vibes which is extremely hit or miss for me. But in this case? I like it! And the bit about the pain behind your eye and the smelling burning is clever, cause I’ve certainly never heard a stroke described that way in song lyrics before. And the “lets talk about bit” with that reverby, slightly distorted guitar in the mess. All in all, this one appeals me quite a bit!

miscellaneous owl:

Hard not to go into this with high expectations given your recent track record. Anyway, I always have to resist the urge to pick up my kids and swing them around like that cause I’m not terribly interested in dislocating their limbs. I’m not sure they would be either. Lyrically, this is remarkably poignant. Production-wise, this is well produced, well mixed, and everything, and yes, it’s a slice of Byrds-ian jangle-pop and your influences show through pretty dramatically. But do I care? Nah. Cause I love this style of songwriting. Among my favorites of the fight. Lately you’ve had this habit of sort of adding in emotional gut-punches at the end of the song and you don’t disappoint. And that slow-down after the elbow line was brilliant. If there’s something wrong here it’s that the Starstream sitar sound does sound kind of fake sometimes. But...you know this.

Paco del Stinko:
I kind of like this slower version of Paco, a more sedate style suits you well! You come up with very unexpected chord progressions pretty often - I like this, it’s a trait that I admire in a lot of musicians even if I don’t follow it that often myself - I could probably broaden my own songwriting by getting more creative with my modulations. The lyrics are nice and spooky, a true descent into madness. I tend to like my bacon less crispy than most, so while it may upset my tummy I imagine that raw bacon with whiskey wouldn’t be TOO upsetting to my palate. It’s difficult to find anything too much to criticize about this one other than just subjective, unhelpful things, so I’ll just say something’s very wrong with your protagonist and they probably need some antipsychotics.

Phlebia:

Medavox pointed out that this sounded like Joy Division, and to be perfectly fair: I don’t really listen to Joy Division much, if at all. Not that I don’t appreciate them, I just tend to listen to other artists more that take a whole lot of stylistic cues from the style they pioneered. Anyway, some of the lines in hear are more meaningful than others -- depression and anxiety have been major topics in family conversations lately. My aunt-in-law killed herself last year, and my own aunt attempted to do the same a few years prior (which nobody told me about until last weekend). In the wake of the former incident, we’ve pretty much gotten to talking about mental health woes with way more people in our extended family, and found out that *way* more people we suspected had been struggling with that sort of thing. So I wound up musing a whole lot about this, and just sort of free-versed lines about that feeling that something’s wrong, even if it isn’t at any particular moment. The “the only difference between you and i” line is directly referencing conversations I’ve had with my wife: she’s depressive and deals with perpetual feelings of low self-worth, whereas I’m a complete doomer in my worldview and tend to me extremely pessimistic about the future. The sample at the end (it’s buried, I know) is an interview with John Michael Greer about the trajectories of civilizations.

Pigfarmer Jr:

You know, when I was reading the lyrics for this I totally forgot that you said that this was about a dog in a Budweiser commercial, but I finally figured it out by the “I’ve got to go, I need something to eat” line. Before that I was kind of thinking that the track was about someone being locked out of the house, instead of being locked in the house. Something’s definitely wrong with people who just abandon their pets. I haven’t seen the commercial in question though, so I may have the narrative all wrong. Anyway, if I had anything to complain about with this track it’s that the piano sounds way too compressed and the drums are kind of clipping, but not in a way that I particularly like. At times I thought the words were a little TOO simple and direct, but...it’s coming from the perspective of a dog. Dogs aren’t that deep. So it works!

ShoehornTC:

I like the juxtaposition of the image between the individual and the nation being successful but still having something going wrong. Kind of echoes by own musings for this topic, which may be why I resonate with this one as much as I do, there’s something subtly wrong with pretty much everything. You do simple but meaningful songs really well. And aren’t we all kind of lonely sometimes? Sometimes I wish that you’d add a little bit more compositional complexity to your songs - they all tend to kind of follow very well-trodden chord progressions, so whenever I hear them it’s not necessarily that I don’t like your songs, it’s that they often sound like something I’ve heard before. Which wouldn’t be a problem if I didn’t care for them to begin with. Anyway, production is good, singing is good, can’t really complain too much!

Travels With Brindle:

By far the most simple entry in the fight, which is what it is. As I’ve said, I’m not the best person to review ukelele driven songs because I don’t like ukelele driven songs - is something wrong with me?. But all it all, I like how you work in the musical “stop” right when it says “stop.”. There’s a couple moments in this track that are kind of pitchy, but by and large it’s fine. I’ll offer the same complaint that I did for ShoehornTC’s track and say that the chord progression is very predictable and “safe”. Which may be the point, it’s the genre! I wish the “stop” was consistent, sometimes it stops and sometimes it doesn’t. I wish I could give you more helpful advice.

Vom Vorton:

See, I told you you’d get a proper listen. I really like the opening arpeggios, and the way the drums come in is really well executed. Is that live drumming or a virtual drummer? If the latter it sounds really convincing. That line about pissing on the precipice and watching crystals fall into the void did sort of make me ponder what you meant, cause all that comes to mind was “is he passing kidney stones?” Cause that would be very wrong. And painful! But then when the crows start singing Black Sabbath I figure our protagonist has taken some of the same stuff Geoff Wreckdom took when he went to go see Cats.. Anyway, my aforementioned doomy impulses very much appreciate the second verse. It kind of reminds me thematically of the Talking Heads’ Nothing But Flowers with its decay imagery, only without the feeling of optimism behind the whole thing. I’m finding my thoughts drifting to which plants would do the best job at piercing a rusted out automobile. Bamboo has a great tendency to pierce whatever obstacle it needs to grow through. If there is something wrong with this entry, it’s that I feel like it’s begging for another verse. I’m getting into the imagery a lot, and I want more!

WreckdoM:
What on earth kind of what in the world kind of I can’t even. I’ve never seen Cats. Wait. That’s not true. When I was a kid I watched the original one at my friend Mikey’s house and thought the whole thing was kind of surreal and weird and I didn’t like it much. Then I think he changed the channel to WWF wrestling and I thought it was surreal and weird and I didn’t like it much. One time I got in an argument with him over a cat. His dad (who I also didn’t like much) went to the store one day. While he was loading his groceries, he kept hear this faint “mew”ing sound. When he got home, he kept hearing it. Puzzled, he kicked his bumper and a little grey tabby came out. Well, they came over to our house and asked us if we wanted another cat. Me, being an enthusiastic elementary schooler and my mom, being a cat lover, said sure! Well Mikey decided a few days later that something was wrong with the situation, and that he really wanted the cat. He must have coaxed his dad into letting him get one because he decided that since they found it, the cat was rightfully theirs. Lots of arguing and shouting and crying over this cat ensued. We kept the cat. Turns out the cat grew up to be an ornery jerk of a cat who I didn’t like much. But none of that is relevant to this song, which I like in its sparse, theremin driven craziness, though I have little to say about it that’s actually constructive.
I'm afraid this one fails on pretty much every level for me. - Jim of Seattle

My bandcamp! https://phlebia.bandcamp.com
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Re: Do you realize there are (Something's Wrong Reviews)

Post by crumpart »

Berkeley Social Scene:
I like the bassline in this a lot, but the song itself isn't really my thing. I wonder what this would sound like with a really peppy, poppy delivery; I think the contrast with the lyrics might be interesting.

Brown Word and the Big Whine:
I can't really hear the vocals well in this. A few phrases jump out here and there, but most of the time they're just getting buried in the music. I'd like to hear some more dynamics throughout, as this gives me a touch of the ear fatigue.

Evil Grin:
This is my favourite song of yours I've heard so far. I like the piano a lot and the guitar is an excellent contrast. Amanda's voice really suits this style of song. The mix is giving the vocals much more presence than normal in your songs. Now that others have mentioned it that little bit of autotune is sticking out, but I didn't notice it on the first listen. Nice ending.

Glenn Case:
I like how all your songs are very clearly Glenn Case songs. This one's not necessarily my cup of tea. I feel like something in the song is calling out for a little more melodic variation maybe. I do like the very abrupt ending.

Glennny:
The intro to this is super fun, and I love those "ooo ooo"s in background. Once the vocals start it loses me a little bit. The different sections aren't gelling together as a whole for me, and it just doesn't hold my attention until the handclaps start up again. I'm always 100% on board with handclaps. I don't love the "she may be crazy but I'm dumb" line.

Hot Pink Halo:
I wrote this after writing an actual letter to the Governor-General asking him to fire the government. They are the worst government of my life, possibly the worst government in Australian parliamentary history, and they are actively doing everything they can to block or reverse any climate change policy. We are all very angry and upset. Musically, I've been wanting to do a song with guitar finger picking in it for a while just to get out of my comfort zone a bit. I wanted this one to start out very tentatively, then build up to all the things. I dropped the drums in the choruses for both practical and contrast reasons: the last four bars of each chorus drop down to a tempo of 110, and I'm not good enough at drum programming to make that sound good. I tried double tracking some of the choruses, but realised I just wanted to keep it as simple and direct as possible. I also tried rerecording some of the other vocals to improve my breathing and delivery, but did a worse job. Figuring out mic technique for the variety of very quiet and sad singing, angry singing and all out yelling was an interesting experience.

Ken's Super Duper Band 'n Stuff:
I enjoyed this a lot on my first listen through, but less on the subsequent listenings. It all comes down to the incessant guitar. If there was variation in the patterns and dynamics I'd listen to this over and over again.

Medavox:
I like that bassline very much. I'm not super fond of the layers of vocals in the way that they're presented. I think they could work better if more attention was paid to timing and eq choices (this is something I've been trying to work on lately myself). I love the delivery on the "do we need a doctor or the manufacturer?" line. The whole thing has a little bit of Billy Bragg late at night at a lock-in about it, which I'm 100% on board with.

miscellaneous owl:
In shocking news, this is excellent and I love it. I have absolutely no constructive criticism at all, I just love it. Even though it's all sad stories, I do feel like it has a little hope, like you made it through and ended up ok even though not everything got put back together.

Paco del Stinko:
That opening line paints one hell of a picture. Reminded me of some of the scenes in Cory White's book "The Prettiest Horse in the Glue Factory" which is a very darkly comic memoir. I like the solo in this; it breaks up the darkness of the lyrics nicely. Another good ending.

Phlebia:
I think your vocals in this one are really good and clear. You've been doing a much better job on that of late. There are some spots where they start to bleed into one another, but that feels like a deliberate artistic choice. That choir voice type sound is working for me.

Pigfarmer Jr:
As previously mentioned, this is one of my favourites from the fight. Nice to hear some pianos making an appearance again; they work very well tonally with your voice. Some of the percussion sounds a little fuzzy and crunchy, and I can't tell if it's deliberate or not. The lyrics and delivery are great.

ShoehornTC:
This is a really enjoyable song. I like that it's sad, but also very laid back and easy to enjoy; there's a nice dissonance there. I think this is probably my favourite song of yours so far.

Travels With Brindle:
Ukuleles: I'm a fan. That being said, I'd definitely be interested in hearing you experiment with some more instruments. Saying that though, I fully realise I'm very spoilt for choice with instruments, as my husband and I enable each other, and not everyone has that much choice. If the uke is what you have to work with, I'd encourage you to experiment with recording it separately to the vocals so that you can really concentrate on making each part as good as it can be. It might be cool to experiment and layer the ukulele up as well, so that it plays multiple roles. It'd be cool to get some percussion happening with it for example. I love the line "I'm a tiny speck of white in someone else's universe".

Vom Vorton:
You had me at "drift into the void". Actually, you had me at the intro, then topped it off with those excellent lyrics in the first verse. This is a sad song that makes me sad, but I still like it an awful lot. I think the solo is working very well in the song as a way to break up the sad.

WreckdoM:
I haven't seen Cats, but I probably should have realised that it was the inspiration anyway. Is the song Memory from Cats? We learned that in music class in primary school, and I've always loved it. If I had any clue about the bizarreness of Cats at the time, I'd probably have entirely different feelings about it. The delivery and content of this song sent me immediately back to 1991, when I was 12 and lived in a large Catholic family in a small town. We only had three radio stations to choose from (one AM, one FM and the public broadcaster talkback), and it was the kind of family where if there was a sex scene in a movie, my dad would turn it off, kneel in front of the tv and say a rosary. Anyway, in 1991 I got a walkman for my birthday, and I was listening to a countdown type show just before dinner on 3BO, the FM station, who played edgier music than 3BA, the AM classic hits station. They played People Are Still Having Sex by LaTour for the first time and it blew my tiny mind. Out the corner of my eye I saw dad turn on the radio in the kitchen, realised what was up and quickly flipped the station to 3BA. He came into the living room and asked which station I was listening to about 3 seconds later. Then he left and I changed the channel right back. Thanks for coming to my storytime. One day Songfight! will have my entire memoir written out in song review format.
Devil’s got me Lindt! Devil’s got me Lindt!
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Re: Do you realize there are (Something's Wrong Reviews)

Post by Pigfarmer Jr »

Some of the percussion sounds a little fuzzy and crunchy, and I can't tell if it's deliberate or not.
Yeah, I added a similar affect to the drums that is on the vocal. Basically distorted it all the way through.
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Re: Do you realize there are (Something's Wrong Reviews)

Post by Lunkhead »

miscellaneous owl wins!
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crumpart
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Re: Do you realize there are (Something's Wrong Reviews)

Post by crumpart »

Congrats owl!
Devil’s got me Lindt! Devil’s got me Lindt!
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vowlvom
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Re: Do you realize there are (Something's Wrong Reviews)

Post by vowlvom »

Congratulations owl! Well deserved.

To respond to a couple of review points that I forgot to mention before:

medavox: I made my lyrics intentionally vague because of the "don't say what it is" optional challenge. Whether it works or not is up to the listener I guess!

I think you were right first time about the middle 8 / solo, it drops the energy level too much. Should have made the drums a bit heavier if I was going half-time I think.

Appz 'n' Vodz: fake drummer. Lo-fi sample set played in on a MIDI keyboard and edited / programmed from there.
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Re: Do you realize there are (Something's Wrong Reviews)

Post by owl »

Awesome! Yay! Also thanks everyone for the reviews!

@crumpart yeah Memory is from Cats, and it's the only song from that musical I like, although actually I think the new T. Swift song they added to the new movie was pretty good too. I read somewhere that the lyrics for Memory were taken from a notebook of unpublished T.S. Eliot poetry rather than the Book of Practical Cats or whatever it's called, which would account for them being noticeably better than the remaining 2 hours of horrible songs about jellicle cats.

Your story was entertaining, although pretty alien to me. My family (and my husband's family) are more in the "never acknowledge this is happening" vein of things when it comes to sex scenes, which has led to cringeworthy situations like having to sit through what felt like two hours straight of extremely steamy softcore in "Dream Lover" starring James Spader and Madchen Amick (described in the Google search results as "hypnotically sensual") with my stepdad when I was a teenager, or sitting around with my husband's whole family over one Thanksgiving watching Henry VIII jerk off into a bowl held by a servant (someone had made the horrible decision that we should all watch HBO's "The Tudors" together as a family). Oh god I am still dying of embarrassment just thinking about both those memories.

@applesandvodka the "sitar" (ascending lick in the first verse and lead over the instrumental breaks) is MIDI, actually, not the Starstream (although the "12-strings" sound a bit fake sitar-ish too). I have yet to unleash the Starstream's sitar on anything, although it will make an appearance soon, I'm sure.
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