And a fifth of whiskey (On My Way Home reviews)

Discuss upcoming, current, and previous song fights.
Post Reply
User avatar
Pigfarmer Jr
Jump
Posts: 2064
Joined: Sat Mar 21, 2009 6:13 am
Instruments: Guitar
Recording Method: Br-900CD and Reaper to mix
Submitting as: Pigfarmer Jr, Evil Grin, Pork Producer, Gilmore Lynette Tootle, T.C. Elliott
Pronouns: he/him
Location: Columbia, Missouri
Contact:

And a fifth of whiskey (On My Way Home reviews)

Post by Pigfarmer Jr »

If you're gonna drink then you might as well do it right. Besides, it makes the reviews both easier to write and easier to digest. ;)
Last edited by Lunkhead on Fri Aug 13, 2021 9:11 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Reason: make normal
Evil Grin bandcamp - Evil Grin spotify
T.C. Elliott bandcamp - T.C. Elliott spotify

"PigFramer: Guy and guitar OF MY NIGHTMARES." - Blue Lang
User avatar
Pigfarmer Jr
Jump
Posts: 2064
Joined: Sat Mar 21, 2009 6:13 am
Instruments: Guitar
Recording Method: Br-900CD and Reaper to mix
Submitting as: Pigfarmer Jr, Evil Grin, Pork Producer, Gilmore Lynette Tootle, T.C. Elliott
Pronouns: he/him
Location: Columbia, Missouri
Contact:

Re: And a fifth of whiskey (On My Way Home reviews)

Post by Pigfarmer Jr »

Please place your lyric in the appropriate thread located here: viewtopic.php?f=5&t=12154
Evil Grin bandcamp - Evil Grin spotify
T.C. Elliott bandcamp - T.C. Elliott spotify

"PigFramer: Guy and guitar OF MY NIGHTMARES." - Blue Lang
User avatar
Lunkhead
You're No Good
Posts: 7794
Joined: Sat Sep 25, 2004 12:14 pm
Instruments: many
Recording Method: cubase/mac/tascam4x4
Submitting as: Berkeley Social Scene, Merisan, Tiny Robots
Pronouns: he/him
Location: Berkeley, CA
Contact:

Re: And a fifth of whiskey (On My Way Home reviews)

Post by Lunkhead »

Songs posted!
User avatar
Adam!
Ice Cream Man
Posts: 1411
Joined: Sat Sep 25, 2004 11:10 am
Instruments: Drum 'n' Bass (but not THAT Drum 'n' Bass)
Recording Method: Reaper + Stock Plugins
Submitting as: Max Bombast
Pronouns: he/him
Location: Victoria, BC, AwesomeLand
Contact:

Re: And a fifth of whiskey (On My Way Home reviews)

Post by Adam! »

Come see how Max spends his lunch breaks:
User avatar
BoffoYux
Panama
Posts: 781
Joined: Tue Jan 11, 2011 9:22 pm
Instruments: Keys, Clunking, SFX and Strings
Recording Method: Audacity, Adobe, and other 'A' titled software
Submitting as: Boffo Yux Dudes
Location: New England
Contact:

Re: And a fifth of whiskey (On My Way Home reviews)

Post by BoffoYux »

I'll be hosting a Listening Party tonight for 'On My Way Home' 9pm EST on Monday 8/2. Just noticed I didn't have the link anywhere - here it is!

https://youtu.be/gG8wHA8-QVQ

Hope to see you guys there!
Hoblit
Hot for Teacher
Posts: 3655
Joined: Sat Sep 25, 2004 12:48 pm
Location: Tampa, Florida Where old people come to die.
Contact:

Re: And a fifth of whiskey (On My Way Home reviews)

Post by Hoblit »

If any of you wondering why I submitted my crap for your ears this fight, I do apologize.

EXCUSE: My monitors kept going in and out. The left one. It turned out it was the circuit board and it just needed some cleaning with a Q-tip and rubbing alcohol. But that wasn't a known variable at the time I was trying to mix and master.

I went ahead and 'finished' it and uploaded it to my own website just in case anyone wants to re-listen, but with a far better version: http://www.breadboxstudios.com/sound/Ho ... ayHome.mp3

I haven't actually listened to any of the entries yet and plan on doing that right now, after this post. I hadn't realized that they were posted but I'm not sure why.

Anyway, that's enough from me for now.
pauley g
Ain't Talkin' 'Bout Love
Posts: 51
Joined: Fri Jun 14, 2013 6:50 pm
Instruments: percussion, piano/synth/programmer, some guitar
Recording Method: mac, logic 10, apogee duet, Arturia and Roland hardware, various plugins, hate.
Submitting as: My Social Uniform
Pronouns: him
Location: somewhere in ohio?
Contact:

Re: And a fifth of whiskey (On My Way Home reviews)

Post by pauley g »

Some thoughts...

Cannonade Streete
I like the way the vocal works and pretty cool stereo image. Do not care for the mix, drums sound too weak for this style. Just a tiny bit of EQ might take care of that? I enjoyed the style of this and overall, pretty well written and arranged!

Critical Rave Theory
You patches are good and meaty, I really enjoyed the textures you are using and like the how they work across the stereo field. This is a good song. I like the lyric, melody, supporting instrumentation. Vocals tight and buttery. Well mixed. I can't think of anything I would do differently to try to improve, maybe try remixing to get some of the elements glued together better? I just realized this is a disgustingly positive review but I guess I need the web address to join the fan club...do you offer discounts on merch?

My Social Uniform
This is mine. Started out one way, became a completely different song. For what it's worth, I had fun developing it and was surprised many times by the direction it wanted to go.

Lichen Throat
Love the kick! Your signature vocal sound sits nicely in this even if I'm not a fan of the lyric. I like the sparse arrangement but I feel like it lacks a developed melody? The rhythm section does get even sweeter as the song builds. I would like to hear more variation to help it build the tension in the lyric.

Hoblit
I feel like I've heard something similar but can't for the life of me place it...pretty tight for the change up in the chorus. Sometimes I feel like your trying to jam extra words in the verse that feel a little wonky. Overall, I enjoyed it. I think the song is worth going back and trying to add some elements to break up the sections a bit more.

The Pannacotta Army
What the hell bro? This might be my favorite songfight song ever. This is so tasty, everything done correct. If you don't win, you should totally call the whole vote rigged.

Duncan Martin
Another good one...I'm not a fan of the harmonica but in fairness, I'm not a fan of any harmonica. I like your lyric and melodies, guitar tones are great, overall mixed well. Something is holding this back but I'm not sure what it is. Definitely a great effort though.

EveryManSkis
Solid in every way. I like this, the guitar interactions, the strong and emotional vocal, well done. The bridge brings it all together.

Sweeney Toad and The Synthlads
Hate the chorus vocal. Love love love everything else. Rap vocal is awesome!

Max Bombast
Got me grooving. Well performed and produced with a catchiness that I can't define. Rocking chorus. I loved the YouTube video as well, it was really neat to see how you were getting from point A to point B and literally pulling this solid piece from thin air. Great job!

Sumner Sloane
I like the melody and Lyric, pretty well crafted. Feels like the vocal consistently pushes the beat though. Not enough variety through the song, I struggle with that too. I think you should keep developing the arrangement on this, it's good but it could be great.

Brown Word And The Big Whine
I love the lyric, really paints a picture in my mind! I need more here though, musically it feels like everything else is an afterthought. I immediately want to tell you to add more but I don't know if that's the answer either. there's an honesty to the stripped down arrangement. Maybe I would try another vocal track doubling the verse sections?

Ever Kenievel
good job on this. Chorus is really beautiful! I might be tempted to keep the octave vocals through the entire verse? Also, I think the piano sound works here but what would it sound like with maybe more of a Rhodes or even add like a B3 organ pad? Spitballing. This is good just the way it is, especially the chorus, it sticks with me.

Pigfarmer Jr.
Another well-written, well-developed song from you. Performance and mix is super solid. This is a tricky one because I don't think the spoken word fits the rest of the song but I also think it needs to be there for context. I might try to use more of a telephone sound there or at least some effect to separate it from the singing tones.

Hostess Mostess
Boom, nailed it. The acoustic guitar work in this is delicious and works so well with the piano. Melody moody and great complimenting the lyric. Song structure here is perfect as well.

I don't mean to break anyone's balls with these reviews, every song in this fight deserves an attaboy sticker. It's been said before but the level of talent in this community makes me feel like I don't belong. All of you make me want to write better songs and for that I thank you.
"You're like the SongFight Weeknd" - Sleepysilverdoor
Check out My Social Uniform on all digital platforms...
User avatar
the panna cotta army
Somebody Get Me A Doctor
Posts: 206
Joined: Sun Mar 20, 2011 11:35 am
Instruments: egg shaker (Grade 2)
Recording Method: Studio One/Mac Mini
Submitting as: the pannacotta army
Pronouns: Helium
Location: Kent, UK

Re: And a fifth of whiskey (On My Way Home reviews)

Post by the panna cotta army »

pauley g wrote:
Tue Aug 10, 2021 12:11 pm

The Pannacotta Army
What the hell bro? This might be my favorite songfight song ever. This is so tasty, everything done correct. If you don't win, you should totally call the whole vote rigged.
Cheers old bean, but you know you've just put the jinx on it now ;) :lol:
User avatar
lichenthroat
Mean Street
Posts: 535
Joined: Thu Oct 27, 2016 12:54 pm
Recording Method: MuseScore & Ardour or Reaper
Submitting as: Lichen Throat, Dimetrodon, Sparetooth, Dessert Tortoise
Pronouns: he/him
Location: New Mexico

Re: And a fifth of whiskey (On My Way Home reviews)

Post by lichenthroat »

Brown Word and the Big Whine—The spoken word works well; you have a good voice for it. This is one of your best mixes. All the instruments sound clear and distinct. The sheriff should have paid his ante before the bet came to him. The drums are played/programmed well.

Cannonade Streete—The aggressive panning is a little unpleasant on headphones. The vocal delivery in the verses and the chorus is really different; I’m not sure they both belong in the same song, although each is okay individually. This feels short, but maybe not too short.

Critical Rave Theory—Oh yeah! This is great! It reminds me of Book of Love without the bells. The song feels lush and gorgeous, and your vocal is excellent. The expansive mix helps too. Zero complaints, lots of enjoyment.

Duncan Martin—I think this is the best of your tetralogy. I also think that the rhyme scheme you’re using is hard to work with; every time I’ve tried it or something similar, it’s never come together quite as I’d hoped. The relatively abrupt ending works pretty well.

Ever Kenievel—I like this. It feels like you might need more effects on the vocal to match the electronic atmosphere of the rest of the song. Your performance is pretty good, though. Nice and solid—good stuff.

EveryManSkis—Good band name. This reminds me (pleasantly) of something I can’t place. I’m not a huge rock epic guy, but I liked this song in spite of that.

Hoblit—I like your chord progression. This has an appealing lo-fi aesthetic (deliberately, I think), but I don’t think it would hurt to widen out the mix. I like your guitar playing, too—all those nice repeating low notes.

Hostess Mostess—Hmmm…I didn’t really care for this my first couple of listens through, but now that I’m listening to it again to write reviews, it sounds pretty good. The sparse arrangement effectively creates an atmosphere of loneliness, desperation, and longing. I’m not sure how strong a bone chain would be, but I have to give you a thumbs up on this one.

Lichen Throat—My tetralogy ended up being less cohesive than I had hoped, but I made it all the way through. This the first time I’ve tried reverb on the drums; I was trying to get an 80s sound. This isn’t quite what I had in mind, but I’m okay with the result. And yeah, I know Chuck Barry hadn’t released “Back in the USA” in 1956.

Max Bombast—Good energy. Nice and bouncy with continually increasing intensity. Your vocal is good, and the lyrics integrate well with the instruments. The cymbals sound kind of weird to me, but I’m not sure why; maybe they seem to cut off prematurely or something. Anyway, good song.

My Social Uniform—I’m not sure if this is late prog rock or early funk. Maybe it’s both. I would think this was a real song from about 35–45 years ago, if I didn’t know better. It sounds like an AOR staple. This isn’t quite my brand of diet soda, but the craftsmanship is undeniable. Nice work.

The Pannacotta Army—And here’s another example of excellent craftsmanship. Not a hair out of place. I wouldn’t mind more intensity, but I know lots of people like the mellow stuff. I like the guitar that plays in the bridge and occasionally elsewhere; nice tone on that.

Pigfarmer Jr—I feel like this needs another effect on the vocal to match the fullness of the rest of the song. Maybe some kind of ADT plugin or something. I like the spoken word parts. I also like the subtlety and ambiguity in the lyrics; we know basically what happened, but not exactly.

Sunmner Sloane—Nice retro sound. This could use more variation or complexity in the drum pattern; it’s very simple. The solo fits in perfectly, stylistically. The lyrics fit will with the retro theme too.

Sweeney Toad—This is mixed super loud. I like that the crunchy synth comes in and out. Maybe a few too many ohohs for me. The arrangement feels pretty polished, which I think is more of an achievement in this genre than in many others. Good distinction between the verse and chorus.
User avatar
Duncan
Somebody Get Me A Doctor
Posts: 175
Joined: Mon Jan 18, 2021 1:53 am
Instruments: Piano, Guitar, Sax, Clarinet, Harmonica, Voice
Recording Method: Reaper
Submitting as: Duncan Martin
Pronouns: he/him
Location: Vancouver, BC

Re: And a fifth of whiskey (On My Way Home reviews)

Post by Duncan »

Thanks for reviewing. Pauley G, if you figure out what's missing, let.me know. I'm trying to figure it out too. I'll bet it's multiple things.
Lichenthroat did you think the rhyme scheme worked in this instance? I thought it got stretched thin a few times but generally slid along like chunky butter.
pauley g
Ain't Talkin' 'Bout Love
Posts: 51
Joined: Fri Jun 14, 2013 6:50 pm
Instruments: percussion, piano/synth/programmer, some guitar
Recording Method: mac, logic 10, apogee duet, Arturia and Roland hardware, various plugins, hate.
Submitting as: My Social Uniform
Pronouns: him
Location: somewhere in ohio?
Contact:

Re: And a fifth of whiskey (On My Way Home reviews)

Post by pauley g »

Duncan wrote:
Wed Aug 11, 2021 10:11 pm
Thanks for reviewing. Pauley G, if you figure out what's missing, let.me know. I'm trying to figure it out too. I'll bet it's multiple things.
Lichenthroat did you think the rhyme scheme worked in this instance? I thought it got stretched thin a few times but generally slid along like chunky butter.
After a couple of additional listens, I’m wondering if I just want all the elements to fit together better and I’m not referring to timing, the looseness of it works and really adds to the feel of the lyric. Maybe try a couple of compressors at the main out? Sometimes spreading the workload over several yields a more cohesive final product. As it stands, this is decently mixed but it just needs to be stuck together a little more. I hope this helps. Don’t give up on it yet, I think it’s good! Also keep in mind where this advice is coming from, if it’s not completely overblown, I bludgeon it until it is :D
"You're like the SongFight Weeknd" - Sleepysilverdoor
Check out My Social Uniform on all digital platforms...
User avatar
lichenthroat
Mean Street
Posts: 535
Joined: Thu Oct 27, 2016 12:54 pm
Recording Method: MuseScore & Ardour or Reaper
Submitting as: Lichen Throat, Dimetrodon, Sparetooth, Dessert Tortoise
Pronouns: he/him
Location: New Mexico

Re: And a fifth of whiskey (On My Way Home reviews)

Post by lichenthroat »

Duncan wrote:
Wed Aug 11, 2021 10:11 pm
Lichenthroat did you think the rhyme scheme worked in this instance? I thought it got stretched thin a few times but generally slid along like chunky butter.
Your individual rhymes are great and are one of your big strengths; they’re creative, specific, and sometimes unexpected. In this song, I don’t think they’re arranged for maximum aesthetic benefit, however.

Here’s how I think about it in my own experience: When I use something like AABBC DDEEC, I’m usually trying to tie the C lines together, but if the space between them is too long, it’s not different than if they don’t rhyme at all (other than to super-careful listeners). That’s usually a problem, since the last line of a chunk (okay, a stanza) is usually something I want to emphasize, rather than downplay, and listeners’ attention is usually drawn to the perceived rhymes. I’ve done this a few times to my own detriment. (It just occurred to me that this is probably why sonnets end with a couplet after 12 lines of ABAB.)

I was trying to find songs where I thought the rhymes were skillfully placed for maximum effect. I scoured the catalogs of Warren Zevon and our own Vom Vorton and Micah Sommersmith. It turned out that most of them were just a series of couplets (AABB). Zevon’s “Piano Fighter” is something like AABBCCCC, which is a little different. Micah’s “The Bottleneck” has some AABBA. Okay, here’s one: check out Okkervil River’s “Singer Songwriter”; I’m not even sure how to properly diagram it, but I think it’s a good example of rhyme placement for maximum aesthetic effect.
User avatar
Lunkhead
You're No Good
Posts: 7794
Joined: Sat Sep 25, 2004 12:14 pm
Instruments: many
Recording Method: cubase/mac/tascam4x4
Submitting as: Berkeley Social Scene, Merisan, Tiny Robots
Pronouns: he/him
Location: Berkeley, CA
Contact:

Re: And a fifth of whiskey (On My Way Home reviews)

Post by Lunkhead »

Critical Rave Theory wins!
Post Reply