Please Stop! No, I mean it. Please Stop (reviews)

Discuss upcoming, current, and previous song fights.
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Spud
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Please Stop! No, I mean it. Please Stop (reviews)

Post by Spud »

Take a hint.
"I only listen to good music. And Octothorpe." - Marcus Kellis
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Ross
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Re: Please Stop! No, I mean it. Please Stop (reviews)

Post by Ross »

Spud wrote:Take a hint.
Hmm - the number of people to whom that could be directed.....

oh, crap! Me????
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Re: Please Stop! No, I mean it. Please Stop (reviews)

Post by JakeDeLorey »

Metaluna – My eyes popped open at the very start of this tune. Production sounds really nice, super clean. Instrument tones sound really good. Drums sound is sweet. I find the tempo drags for a short spot. But other then that, spot on metal instrumental anthem. Great work.

Architects of Desire – So far this is shaping up to be a tough week. Mind you I guess I havn’t been here long enough to really judge that, but compared to last weeks tunes, these are kickin some butt. I’m really digging this tune. A nice solid smokey slow groove. Great production value. Vocals sound great and the vocalist has a great singing voice. Piano really adds a lot to this tune and mellows me out nicely. Superb entry, probably get a vote from me. Still a bunch of tracks to go though.

Berkley Social Scene – Sigh...time to cut my losses and never submit again. Another nice tune. Guitar tone is not working for me, but its not taking away to much from the enjoyment of this tune. Last week BSS stuck out to me as someone to watch. Not hard to tell that a lot of work goes into his/their tunes. This is not my cup of tea, but you can’t deny that these guys take their craft seriously.

Betting on the Muse – hmmmmmmmm. I was thinking it was gonna be sorta like a “Bright Eyes” tune, but nope. Not working for me. I would hash it out a bit more and tune your guitar. I’m gonna assume you’re going for that rustic lo-fi indie pop sound, but it just comes off as thrown together last minute.

Billys Little Trip feat. The Hoblits – For some weird reason I was excited to hear this collab. Maybe because word on the street is the girl singing background doesn’t do to bad in the “boys” department. 8) really fun tune. High quality production. This tune rocks. Not sold on the “faith no more” rap break, but it doesn’t phase me enough to dislike this tune. This collaboration needs to happen way more often. Probably a vote.

Christopher Cogott *****– Man oh man oh man....ooooh man. You got some great pop sensibility. Quality musicianship, ugh its depressing me. Last weeks submissions really were not a good representation of the sorta talent that haunts this site. It really shows me that I have to up the ante if I want to ever win a song fight. This tune is going to my ipod. A definite vote from me.

Jake Delorey – well this tune is a success for me solely because I finished it. What jumps out at me the most is that the vocals are quite in the first verse and the bass needs to come up or at least stand out more. The “solo” was a last minute addition, and I’m thinking I probably should have just left it out being that I am not a very good guitar player. Oh well, short and sweet, a great learning experience. Looking forward to being torn apart by Spintowns reviews. Bring the pain 8)

James Owens – this song to me is what goes on in the head of someone with multiple personality disorder during beddybye time. Nice tune, not a fan of that sax sound though, it cheapens the tune. Still though, nice job.

Jeff Robertson and the Neo-Candylanders – ah the lements of a facebook lurker. Nice quirky tune. Not overly quirky, just enough. Fun song. Might have gotten my vote, but the competition is way to stiff this week.

Jonathan Mann - This song has hooked me from the beginning. Love that “Piano” sound. Really nice job on the lyrics and delivery. Overall production sounds really nice. Someone else who probably has a good entry to win ratio going. I could learn a lot from Mr. Mann...actually that doesn’t work does it, lets stick with Jonathan Mann.

Jeffrey davis – whats this all abo....oh its done. Next

Stucco Lobster Breadbox – watch your levels. Your piano accents are making my nose bleed. Enjoyed your lyrics, you accomplished the lo-fi indie sound much better then Betting on the Muse.

Mister Mann – not sure why I like your tunes. Everything in me says no to this tune, but I just gotta stick around and listen, so somethings working. You definitely have a great lyrical ability.

The Weakest Suit – heads and tails above their entry for last week. Like the tune, and would love to hear it developed more. Maybe another acoustic accompaniment and a bg vocal. Its nice as an acoustic tune, wouldn’t want you to change that aspect of it. Nice submission.

Wages – timing on this tune needs to be tightend up, its very draggy. Not really a bad tune, I hear lots of potential, but definitely needs a bit more tightening up.

Tobins Spirit guide – thats a pretty little ditty you got there. Like to hear all the levels bumped up a bit. Its sorta washed out. I couldn’t agree more about please stop putting your dog in a handbag. The best part of the tune is the break at the end. Thumbs up for the most part. Not enough for a vote unfortunately.

WTFBBS – the rhythm track had me, but as soon as the lyrics came in it lost me. Not sure if rap is the genre you should stick with. The English bloke wasn’t so bad, but the flow of these lyrics is just not working for me. Not on my list of repeat plays.

State Shirt – well according to the majority of the posts I have read on Songfight, people think this guy is the second coming. Its a fine track, and I am assuming this was all done on the fly, which adds alot to it in my head. The guy has got some talent, no doubt. I guess sometimes for me sonic landscapes can be overdone sometimes and don’t always keep me interested. Its really just a matter of opinion though. Nice track but I’ll save a stateshirt vote for his next submission....maybe 8).

Soap Yourself – first things first. I dig your band name. Vocals are a bit loud for me and could stand to use some sort of treatment. Maybe a bit of reverb or something. Not sure. There are some timing issues here and does not flow nicely, seems rushed sometimes. Parakeets in heat eh? Intersting.

Scrap Heap – well last week I said to throw the tune on the scrap heap. Lets see how they sit on my musical palette this week. Theres no hook, and although a heartbeat is important to make a song real, a hook helps. This is better then last weeks for sure, but still not a big fan. A mind can always be changed though. Lets see how scrap heaps next submission goes.

Ross Durand – Last but not least. This is another individual who seems to have a powerful reputation here at song fight. I like this tune much more then last weeks. Nice acoustic sound you got, and a Harp track will always get you bonus points with me. Vocally I find this much better then last week. You have toned it down just a tad and it turns out you have a nice voice for your style. Lookin forward to future submissions as your style is right up my ally.

Well this weeks submission were really good overall. So many different musical styles, lots to take away from this and incorporate into my own developing style. Votes this week go to Metaluna, architects of desire, Billys litte trip feat.Hoblit, and Christopher Cogott with what is the best song of the batch in my opinion. Cheers guys, until the next rumble.
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Re: Please Stop! No, I mean it. Please Stop (reviews)

Post by Hoblit »

I guess par was raised some time ago? This is an excellent set of songs so far. I'm still only about half way but I'm really impressed with the general quality so far.
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Re: Please Stop! No, I mean it. Please Stop (reviews)

Post by Wages »

JakeDeLorey wrote:Wages – timing on this tune needs to be tightend up, its very draggy. Not really a bad tune, I hear lots of potential, but definitely needs a bit more tightening up.
Thanks for the review! Part of the problem here is I have to manually delete the latency from the beginning of the tracks and I'm sometimes off by a few milliseconds. Secondly, it's because I just started playing bass and Thirdly, I'm not that great at lead guitar. Other than that, I don't know what you speak of. ;)
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Re: Please Stop! No, I mean it. Please Stop (reviews)

Post by JakeDeLorey »

Wages wrote:Secondly, it's because I just started playing bass and Thirdly, I'm not that great at lead guitar. Other than that, I don't know what you speak of. ;)
I am in the exact same boat. I'm hoping next tune though I will be enlisting the help of some quality players from my hometown and abroad.
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Re: Please Stop! No, I mean it. Please Stop (reviews)

Post by AJOwens »

Architects of Desire - This has a nice low jazz/blues feel, but with some modern electronic elements that don't quite work for me. I'm struggling to explain why. Conspicuous in the mix, distressingly slow, and almost military in their austerity and precision, they seem to hold hostage the relaxed sweetness of the vocal melody. It isn't until the acoustic guitar and languid piano appear that this song comes into its own. I like what you're trying to do, especially with the shimmering violins, but it doesn't blend for some reason.

Berkeley Social Scene - Novel composition, musical variety, good performances as always. Some busyness, but this seems to be part of your style, and in this song it feels focussed and purposeful.

Betting on the Muse - The recording has a distinct "tank" sound; you need some parametric EQ. I'm not sure whether your highly erratic rhythms and meandering chords are intended as an art statement, or you just don't have the confidence to proceed steadily. If the latter, then I can't get a grip on the song, so I can't really tell if it's good or not -- practice, man, practice. If the former, then no, it doesn't work for me.

Billy's Little Trip feat. The Hoblits - Good energy, some nice textures. A little too loose in the "Senorita" passages, otherwise very tight, always interesting. A possible vote.

Christopher Cogott - Good hard-edged pop with imaginative rhythmic surprises. Solid musicianship, well-arranged harmonies. A possible vote.

Jake Delorey - Kicking guitar lick! Vocals mixed a bit low, and I think the fade-in weakens the intro, but other than that, a good straight-ahead treatment. The song has a very natural flow. An impressive entry, and a possible vote.

James Owens - I created a four-chord MIDI loop while messing around with some new software, and decided to work it into a song. It's a riff on repetition and boredom. One thing I've learned from other contributors here is that if a loop starts to wear thin, you can just switch the drums or whatever out for a couple of bars, switch them back in, and hey presto -- instant excitement! I pulled some other tricks too. The talking lyrics are from the local TV listings.

Jeffrey Davis - Not so polite or desperate as to involve "please," so it's a bit off-topic. A puzzling interlude.

Jeff Robertson and the Neo-Candylanders - The guitar around 0:36 is uncomfortably thick, but apart from that this is an enjoyably loony one-two kick. Something of a novelty song, but I might vote for it.

Jonathan Mann - Another good entry in this fight. It's interesting music, well-arranged, well-performed, well-recorded. The interspersed 4/4 and 5/4 bars in the chorus are very effective. I could vote for this one too. Geez, I'm going to have some decisions to make.

Metaluna - The echoed guitar notes step on each other a bit. What happens at 1:10 is very odd, as if another, somewhat louder song has started at a different tempo. There's lots of interesting stuff going on, but it has a rather unplanned quality and no sense of development -- just different phases, some of which are tighter than others. -- Hey, was that an instrumental?

Ross Durand - So it is OK to do a 12-bar here! Nice harp and guitar work, although the two guitars sometimes get a little muddy together in the mix. This genre works for your voice. Well-executed; a possible vote.

Scrap Heap - Too loud! Your keyboard is overdriving the input, I think. I like the core of this song, but it gets repetitive. Such lyrics as I noticed seemed off-the-wall. The singing -- well, needs work. Arrangement develops in the drums and might be fun, but it's hard to be sure when it pegs the needle like that.

Soap Yourself - The song itself has plenty of potential and a good hook. It reminds me a little of Barenaked Ladies at times. The realization needs stronger and more even recording levels, and tighter, more assured instrumental performances.

State Shirt - Develops a good groove. Textures are noteworthy as always. Trademark rich harmonies. "Don't come around here any more" has an appropriate weary urgency, and in general the lyrics are fitted in a very cool way. A possible vote.

Stucco Lobster Breadbox - We have a life-size plaster lobster in our lobster kitsch collection, but not a stucco lobster breadbox. Where can we get one? Tinny recording, you need a good mic. Also, low-end keyboards have come a long way since that rhythm box was manufactured. Still, entertaining lyrics and an infectious boppiness; basically a pretty good song, if you can put up with the scatalogical focus.

Tobin's Spirit Guide - The song hums along, pleasant and unremarkable, and is then lit on fire by that great rant.

Wages - A noticeably richer sound here. It will get even better once you have the hang of the bass. Doubling the vocals at the chorus doesn't really work for me; harmony would be better. OK song. The bridge is well-sung, other parts not so much. (Do you usually sing while playing guitar, or on a separate take?)

The Weakest Suit - The song has possibilities and some interesting features, but is too ambitious and perhaps too driving to render properly as a G&G.

WTFBBS - Great rhythm track. The rap still isn't convincing. I don't know why; if I tried rap it would probably sound like this, so what can I tell you? The music seems like it would work though. In fact its rich wall-of-sound approach pushes the envelope for a rap backing, and has a lot of promise.
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Re: Please Stop! No, I mean it. Please Stop (reviews)

Post by scrapheap »

Hello songfight, I'm scrap heap!

Be warned, I am only slightly better at reviewing than I am at writing songs.

Jeffrey Davis: I like that songfight showed me this one first, it's kind of an intro! But... not much of a "song."

Jake DeLorey: Really "phoning it in" on the vocals, it doesn't sound particularly heartfelt, and I don't like how the chorus both starts and ends with just "please stop," the way the title is worked in doesn't seem natural. Agreeable tune and nicely produced though.

Jeff Robertson and the Neo-Candylanders: This is awesome! I love the bouncy 2/4 sound, the driving energy, and the generally hazy lovesick feel. To say nothing of the "yeah!"s!

State Shirt: Wow, so spacey. Gets a bit too coffeehouse for me in the last chorus with the "aahs," and I'm not feeling the sudden ending. Still, for instrumentation that sounds like it's right off a Boards of Canada record, Thom Yorke-ish vocals, an enveloping wall of sound and skillful execution, this gets a check from me.

Soap Yourself: With better drums this could be good. I loved the sudden, unexpected kick drum assault - I was like, "oh man, this is about to get awesome," but then it didn't, the drums immediately vanish into the background, barely audible, and they're generic General MIDI-sounding drums. Leave out the drums and make a totally guitar-driven song if that's what you want, but don't do THIS.

Mister Mann: Doesn't gel. This song isn't more than the sum of its parts and I feel like it needs more parts at that.

Ross Durand: Nice toe-tapping rhythm, very funky. The mostly strong vocal delivery falters in a few places, and the second repetition of "please stop and [don't/let's not] start again" at the end seems unnecessary, just say it once and wrap up there!

Metaluna: Won't you please stop soloing and actually sing something? Oh, it's an instrumental. Very good instrumental, but I can't see how it's a response to the "Please Stop" title - could've been sitting on your hard drive for years for all I know. Also it seems really long somehow even though it's just 3:26.

Billy's Little Trip feat. The Hoblits: Like the RHCP-ish sound of the vocals, but said vocals vanish into the background a lot. "You had better just be" what? Couldn't hear that word. Clearer production is needed here; overall it's great, but you can't get away with indistinct vocals with this type of song (it's not exactly shoegaze).

Betting On The Muse: So I like that I'm not the only person whose entry starts with "Please stop" as the first two words in the song. Lazy lyric writers unite! As for the song itself, I can sometimes get into this lo-fi laptop mic aesthetic, but the songwriting has to be awesome, not just random strumming that goes nowhere.

Berkeley Social Scene: I feel bad for not enjoying this, because I can't pinpoint any reason why I don't. It sounds generic somehow. Valid criticism? Surely not, but that's all I can come up with.

Architects of Desire: Two of a kind w/ State Shirt's song. This hits all the right buttons for me. "you're only makin' it harder on... [BEAT DROP] me" = ingenious. Vinyl crackle; haunting, possessed piano; fuck, this is great.

WTFBBS: Um, no. Please stop trying to rap w/ a voice like this. Perhaps I don't like nerdcore either...? There's no flow and no presence or force behind the words. Oh, now y'all decided to say fuck it and go play a video game. Works for me, just maybe don't submit the song next time.

Jonathan Mann: Not bad, but not excellent and not really my thing. I get fatigued on the acoustic guitar songs after a while.

James Owens: Unfortunately, I feel this instrumental would be improved by taking out the spoken word "please stop"s, which would then disqualify it for songfight. Background chatter is a nice touch. Okay, by the ending this has won me over again. Good stuff.

Stucco Lobster Breadbox: Way to use the accompaniment on your toy keyboard. I'd like to hear more vocal trickery, don't be so rigid, since the vocals are all you really have here - in particular the lines "wring his... [long pause] tiny neck," you need to connect that somehow. Think outside the bar!

Tobin's Spirit Guide: Sonically, nice arrangement. The chorus kind of annoys me, but I sympathize with writing an awesome sounding verse and not knowing where to go from there. Or maybe you like your chorus and now think I'm an asshole. End is so jarring, instead of just "we could be friends," I'd like it to go "we could be friends, please STOP." and resolve.

Wages: It's the kind of garage-sounding stuff I'd rock the fuck out to live, buy the band's CD, get home and listen to it and wonder what I was thinking. Good energy, nice and gritty, yet somehow "generic" sounding and no, I don't know what the fuck that means, except maybe that I can't find a foothold to get into it emotionally.

Christopher Cogott: Great flow, vocal reminds me of The Offspring. I dig this lots.

The Weakest Suit: Couldn't see myself listening to this often, though for what it is, it's good.

Scrap Heap: I have the most apropos band name ever, n'est-ce pas? Well, it sucks, because I was too self-satisfied to put in an actual chorus, and the redlining, maxxxxxxed-out sound I was going for with the mix, doesn't coexist well with clean piano. And the vocals are kind of off. But I would be happy with this song if it had a chorus instead of the utterly pointless instrumental thing it has instead. Smacking myself 4 that 4 realz.

Favorites: JeffRob & the Neo-Cs, Architects of Desire, State Shirt, Christopher Cogott, Ross Durand, James Owens. Also I voted for my own song even though I don't actually like it. Is that cheating?
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Re: Please Stop! No, I mean it. Please Stop (reviews)

Post by wyrfxrssn »

JakeDeLorey wrote:WTFBBS – the rhythm track had me, but as soon as the lyrics came in it lost me. Not sure if rap is the genre you should stick with. The English bloke wasn’t so bad, but the flow of these lyrics is just not working for me. Not on my list of repeat plays.
I am not good at making music with instruments. I'm very average at playing guitar anyway.
AJOwens wrote:WTFBBS - Great rhythm track. The rap still isn't convincing. I don't know why; if I tried rap it would probably sound like this, so what can I tell you? The music seems like it would work though. In fact its rich wall-of-sound approach pushes the envelope for a rap backing, and has a lot of promise.
We hope to one day reach the level of awesomeness that the beat has reached.
scrapheap wrote:WTFBBS: Um, no. Please stop trying to rap w/ a voice like this. Perhaps I don't like nerdcore either...? There's no flow and no presence or force behind the words. Oh, now y'all decided to say fuck it and go play a video game. Works for me, just maybe don't submit the song next time.
Would LOL again. I'm working on flow. If you compare to our last song it's most definitely better (I was first rapper this time and American rapper last time). Theoretically it will continue to improve.
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Re: Please Stop! No, I mean it. Please Stop (reviews)

Post by bdog5778 »

Thank you all for the input so far. I appreciate every last inch of it.

Now, for a few disclaimers:

-This song is most definitely supposed to have lyrics. Unfortunately, I had a trip planned for Tuesday through Thursday and I had no chance to finish lyrics/vocals. I actually stayed up all Monday night and into Tuesday morning (had to leave for the airport at 4:30 a.m.). I give it as my opinion that this song wouldn't seem so long were the vocals to be present. Alas, it was not meant to be.

-This song is most definitely geared around the topic of "Please Stop". To be sure, I actually have had the opening riff and the harmonies around for ~11 years. The opening riff is my attempt at a Radiohead vibe, circa "OK Computer". So many wonderful songs about the futility of existence...but I digress. The rest of the song came together rather easily given the topic. Quite a magical occurrence for me as I get rather precious about these things -resulting in compositional paralysis.

-Given the above, the lyrical content -when finished- will address the ennui resulting from the tired cliches used to depict people of my political persuasions. The indifference turns to resolve building into righteous anger and a refusal to back down or be shamed into silence. "Please stop telling me to stop breathing or the world ends. I will not bow to your gods and I don't practice your religion." Stuff of this nature.

A deconstruction of the music:

-As mentioned before, that opening clean riff is intended to be evocative of Radiohead.

-The delay line is me attempting to create a "Riders on the Storm" type of descending riff -and failing wonderfully and miserably.

-The delay line just before the start of the second verse is me ripping off Randy Rhoads' solo on "Over the Mountain" [Ozzy Osbourne - Diary of a Madman].

-The bass riff during the verses is obviously just a re-working of the opening riff. I don't know when exactly it decided to get funky, but it seemed to have a mind of its own.

-The clean staccato is me thinking that the funky bass needed something between "Another One Bites the Dust" and "I Need You Tonight". Wrongness.

-The bridge riff? Oh, I don't know - it's just some emo-ish add9 chords with the bass doing its own counterpoint underneath. Too much Led Zeppelin/Soundgarden counterpoint bass ingested over the years.

-The chorus/harmonies are the natural outgrowth of two bands that I was heavily exposed to between 2nd and 4th grades: Queensryche and Metallica. This stuff will leech out of me 'til the day I die.

-I hadn't intended to have a sped up coda; frankly, I usually HATE it when bands do that. Still, it seemed kind of punk rock -in fact, the MIDI loops for this section were called "punk 01", etc. -and I dug it. I later realized that it fit in perfectly with the theme of the song: the dam breaking and the deluge proceeding apace.

At any rate, having bloviated endlessly, I hope everyone enjoys this song for what it is. Thanks for listening.
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Re: Please Stop! No, I mean it. Please Stop (reviews)

Post by Spintown »

I voted for:

1. Ross Durand - I'm going to start sounding like a Ross Rurand fanboy. But he's been on a hot streak lately, in my opinion at least. A simple, well wrote, well performed song that is just fun to listen to.

2. Christopher Cogott - Catchy, well produced, and I'll probably end up playing this more then any other song from this round. I find myself lip syncing to it half the time it's playing.

3. Tobin's Spirit Guide - Fun song that most people will relate to at multiple points. The pissed off rant & the instrumental section (1:47-2:27) didn't really fit the rest of the song, and really changed the overall feel that I was enjoying. Overall great, but the mood changer I mentioned really bugged me since I was diggin' light & fun version of the rant.

4. Mister Mann - Interesting duet of sort, but I had to really concentrate to follow along. Just felt like a cross between a song & a tennis match. Enjoyable, but my neck is starting to hurt from my attention being jerked from side to side.

5. Architects Of Desire - Very relaxing & sweet tune. Enjoyed the vocals.

I'm too lazy to write about the rest, but overall it was the best Song Fight round I've heard so far. Good work.

http://spintown79.blogspot.com/2010/02/ ... -stop.html
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Re: Please Stop! No, I mean it. Please Stop (reviews)

Post by stateshirt »

Just finished the video for my entry this week. :)

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Re: Please Stop! No, I mean it. Please Stop (reviews)

Post by bettingonthemuse »

So, I take it thrown together dosen't work here. *sarcasm*

Anyways, I did throw it together sort of last second the chords were all off and the tuning was way out. I apologize for such. Next fight I should have the time to get around to practicing and actually get into the production of it although I generally lean towards the lo-fi sound at times. I got to say every thing needed to be wrapped up better it was a bit jittery.

Moving on, I give my vote to The Weakest Suit, and StateShirt. Really digging the video stateshirt made.

There's always next time right?
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Re: Please Stop! No, I mean it. Please Stop (reviews)

Post by Spud »

scrapheap wrote:Jeffrey Davis:Won't you please stop....
scrapheap wrote:I can't see how it's a response to the "Please Stop" title
"I only listen to good music. And Octothorpe." - Marcus Kellis
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Re: Please Stop! No, I mean it. Please Stop (reviews)

Post by scrapheap »

Spud, you got me there. I guess. I actually have no idea what your point is.
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Re: Please Stop! No, I mean it. Please Stop (reviews)

Post by Hoblit »

PLEASE READ FIRST:
I want to start by saying that I thought, over all, that this was a good fight to listen to. Just about everything was 'listenable' and decent enough to get non-songfighters to come pay a visit. This was a lot of good stuff. But Songfight! is all about the good with the bad and there was a time when some of my own productions were 'bad'. I improved BECAUSE of this place.
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Architect: I dig this quite a bit. The beat and piano reminds me a bit of The Boondocks opening theme, barring the missing rap. Excellent singing and great delivery. Very passionate for a song written in 10 days. I like the very minimal acoustic against all of the other acoustic instruments that have a very electronic feel. Great textures. Definitely gets a vote from me.

Berkley SS: Fine rock n' roll. It almost has a Clash feel to it believe it or not. At least a late 70's or early 80's rock sound. This too will get a vote from me. I like the careless yet tight vocal delivery. I think thats what gives it that Clash sound. Not exactly angry but desparate pleading with a touch of heat packed in there. Triggers ready to be pulled. Very good work. I love all of the guitars but I'm not crazy about the keyboard. Again though, that is part of the overal late 70's, early 80's sound it gives.

Betting Muse: I didn't care for this. I had a hard time figuring out where the rhythm was and that was distracting. I hear you count...but then I hear a very abrupt cut. Low-Fi doesn't always bother me but in this case it suffers because it's too distracting. This song needs a lot more work. With that said, I'd never want to discourage you. My advice to you would be work on tracking things out. Get that guitar on a rhythm, maybe with a click track. Go back and place the words a bit more carefully over that.

BLT y el Joblitos: My cousin Beth Joy was very excited about being a part of this. She has always wanted to something in my studio and here was her first chance to shine. She would have sang the whole damn thing if I let her. BLT laid out a nice programmed drum set against some very cool guitar work. I've gotta' say that this is one of my finer bass lines. While I will be somewhat critical of my own vocal work here, I have done better, It's not too bad for having written the verses just hours before laying them down. Overall I think this is a pretty good collaboration. Would do it again. Thanks BLT!

Christoph: This is best song this week. Not to take away from anyone else, but your work here is tight. Great content, great harmonies, and an over all great performance. I love the guitar work especially. Very tight, and your vocal delivery sounds so natural even with all of the rest of the rhythm chops. I'm a sucker for hooks and the 'never want to see you again' chorus ends leaves it bouncing around in my head. Good guitar solos, great oooOOOoos, great everything. This song rocks through and through. (obvious vote)

JakeD: I've been listening to a lot of alt country lately and this strikes me as an offshoot of that sound just a little. I think it's that hooky electric guitar lick. The acoustic guitar is real sweet and this reminds me a bit of Ken's Super Duper Band a little and at first I thought it was him/them. I love the spooky, sometimesw falsetto, backing vocals. This is a very well put together track. Lyrically and performance wise. I especially am impressed with how simply good it is overall for a 10 day piece. VOTE.

JamesO: This is good. I like how everything just flows along over the casual conversation in the background. Almost as if this was all happening in one's head at an uncomfortable party. You paint that imagery for me and that means it has value. Minimal yet effective. Dangerously close to gimmicky but I think overall, it's a pretty decent piece. I can hear some improv and you generally pull it off. I like this.

Jeffrey to the D: I'm just glad that this was only 32 seconds along. I could say something cheesy like "please stop" doing this. But, I really don't see much value in this.

Jeffrey to the R: LOVE IT. I would never be able to get my friends into this but *I* love it. It's wacky but tight. The obvious facebook content is something I think all of us can relate to and therefore gives it something to shake our fists to. I love the OOHMPA OOHMPA craziness of it. I think the
vocal delivery is right on for this type of thing. Guitar, while the messiest part of this song was just good enough and roped in to keep this thing exciting and entertaining. Good work and you'll get a vote from me.

Jonman: This reminds me of that one European band that did that whistling song a few years ago. This is really good. I love the hooky "pleeeaas stop" airy vocal over acoustic guitar, while the drums come back in a measure later. It's very sweet with all of the falsetto. Very talented and I look forward to more from you in the future. Another vote.

MetalLuna: A cross between The Cure & Metallica. I like this a little bit. That first clean solo is something I used to do when I was first learning my delay petal back when I first got one. That is not supposed to be an insult, just that I can relate to that harmonizing rhythm solo thing. This is a well performed piece. I just can't say that I'm crazy about it. Not sure how it relates to the title, but it's not bad. I can't and wouldn't say anything bad about it, it's just not grabbing me really.

Mr.Mann: I'm not crazy about this but I see value in it anyway. I kind of like the way the lines come in over each other. Sounds unnatural but has a nice affect. This is decent work, but again, it just doesn't grab me. Not my thing kind of thing. Keep up the good work. You are talented, I'm the one who is behind on this one. There is simply nothing wrong with it at all.

RossD: Reminds me of Songfight! music of yesteryear. I like the lyrical content and it reminds me of a take on the subject that Jim Tyrell might take on the title. In fact, it reminds me of his work a bit in the acoustic bluesy type thing. (Although your voice and octave sets you apart quite clearly) This is a very good bluesy performance and I love the earthy and simple production. Harmonica in there accentuating and filling in the nuance it needs to keep it in its blues bound tin can. Gets my vote.

Scrap Heap: Reminds me of Fluffy Porcupine quite a bit. Electronica heavy on piano. The singing reminds me of earlier Fluffy, and even the lyrical content is spot on for Fluffy. Weird. Not Fluffy? On that note, I think there is value in this song. I even like the content. I think the vocal performance suffers a bit. Keep working on it. It always gets better with practice. It's a bit repetitive though. Needs a little change up. I can appreciate that the layers are added as the song goes on.

Soapy: I like the intamacy of the introduction. I would have mixed the vocals and bass a little bit lower throughout the song. I hear a lot of bass and a lot of vocals. Hardly any drums at all. (Which I can appreciate if they are mixed low for a reason) Over all, this isn't a bad tune at all. I like the female soft vocal accompanyment, that is a nice touch. The production is just a little distracting. If you are at all interested in my advice: EQ out some of the lower frequencies on the vocals and then add a LIGHT effect. Just a hair of reverb or something. EQ some higher frequencies in the bass and take it down a little in the mix. Mix the drums in just slightly higher. I think that will make the song more even and the listener can just LISTEN. But meh, who am I? Nobody, thats who. Keep up the good work.

Stateshirt: Amazing as usual. I love the ethereal approach you take in a lot of your work. You sound professional and it makes me mad that some of the crappiest music I ever heard gets the paycheck while folks like you hang around Songfight! for the fun of it. Excellent guitar work, I love the perfectly timed delay effect and the vocal delivery is simply perfect. I love the harmonies and it's effecting choices. Up front but echoey at the same time. Great lyrical content and perfect melody. I'm jealous. This is one of the best songs this week. VERY CLOSE second in my book. (I just happen to be a pop rock type fan) I always hate goin' up against you. (And by hate, I mean... no offense, but you always blow me away!)

SLB: Cute. But I don't really like much about this song. I think it's cute that you are using some sort of low-fi keyboard drums for this. While I can sort of relate to the lyrical content, I'm not crazy about this performance.(It doesn't help that you come next after Stateshirt in the alphabetical play list)

MP3playerdidn'tlistNAME: This is cute and I like how it's something that MOST of us can relate to. I like how sweet it is but then the cussing kind of confusing that. That goes a long way with me. Tongue and cheek kind of stuff. Then the break down with the distorted vocals really letting it all out there is pretty cool too in my book. Your song is a good show of how Lo-Fi can really work great and not really be kill a song. It reminds me of really early Sublime. I'm going to assume you are familiar with that work. If not, you need to find some of it and give it a listen. You'll get a lot of worth from it. Good work.

Wages: I do not care for this. However, what I don't like can be roped in later down the road. The vocals are a bit loud in the mix and are a bit too loose. As with the guitars, they aren't in very good time against the constant drums. I hear things that can be fixed to make a good song. Almost like you needed another week to practice your work before it went to tape. Not good this time around but I expect you'll only grow from here, because it's not all bad.

Weakest: I like this ok. This is nice and simple. You aren't doing anything you can't handle and it comes off as a very nice performance. I expect this could be better if you had a little more time. (as all of us right?!) I don't think it 'suffers' though. I think this is a pretty good song. I like the unique 'please stop' tie in. Strong acoustic piece and I can appreciate it's simplicity. Stop drop and roll is a cute take on the title, as well as the swimming reference. Good work.

WTF: I don't have much to say about this because it's not within the realms of what I like and I don't much care for anything content wise. I'll say that the programming wasn't bad. Oh, and I did like the 'Mommy Voice' reference.
wyrfxrssn
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Submitting as: WTFBBS

Re: Please Stop! No, I mean it. Please Stop (reviews)

Post by wyrfxrssn »

Hoblit wrote:WTF: I don't have much to say about this because it's not within the realms of what I like and I don't much care for anything content wise. I'll say that the programming wasn't bad. Oh, and I did like the 'Mommy Voice' reference.
Fair enough.
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glennny
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Instruments: Guitar, Bass, Mandolin, Dobro, Banjo, E-Bow, Glock
Recording Method: Garageband
Submitting as: Berkeley Social Scene
Location: Castro Valley, California

Re: Please Stop! No, I mean it. Please Stop (reviews)

Post by glennny »

Architects of Desire- Excellent band name by the way. I love this. Although it’s very very very Portishead/ Massive Attack, it is nice to hear. Can you believe that stuff now sounds retro to me? So this 90’s trip hop throw back is beautiful. I particularly like the jazz in your melody on the line “destiny” that half beat pause takes the melody from good to awesome. The vocals really shine. The vocals are my favorite part (weird for me). VOTE, keeper, mix CD, playlist, example of why I love Song Fight etc.

Betting on the Muse-
Sounds like you have an idea for a song. You might want to practice it before recording and submitting. This recording is absolutely terrible, makes it very hard to hear the idea you had for a song. The tempo is all over the place. The playing is sloppy. I can’t understand the lyrics, so I will naturally assume they are the most beautiful and heart wrenching poetry I was ever almost exposed to. Serious scooping with the melody.

Billy’s Little Trip over the Hoblits- VOTE! Song Fight Live 2010 San Francisco! I expect you all there. I expect to hear this song. This kicks ass. I have to admit I was a little disappointed when I read who this was, I was excited there was a new awesome songfighter, but it was the collab between established awesome Song Fighters. This meets all expectations. VOTE keeper etc. Well done.

Christopher Cogott- Is anyone else feeling the Weird Al? This is very good. Hot damn! Nice solo, worth the price of admission. I love all the backing vocals. This is catchy. The lyrics are rather forgettable other than “medulla oblongata”. This will probably be the Medulla Oblongata song in my head. Certainly worthy of a VOTE! Well done, I can’t wait to hear more!

Jake Delorey- Not a fan of the fade in. I like the vibe that is established. Cool guitar tones. The verse is stronger than the chorus. I wish the beat changed up. With the monotonous drums and the obvious refrain change it’s almost a song by numbers. The instrumental guitar bits and the verse is really good however. Good stuff. With some more development this could elevate from pleasant background music to “Turn it Up! I just LOVE this song”. Short of a vote I fear.

James Owens featuring Emille- YOU LEFT YOUR TV ON WHILE RECORDING! (jk, I know it’s part of the “art”) You guys are very talented. I hate to criticize you guys, but I really hate this track. Perhaps that is the meta art of it. Your point was make us feel “PLEASE STOP”. I get it. I don’t like it. I look forward to your next non-schtick entry.

Jefferey Davis- Similar art song with the appropriate 32 second length. Not blowing my mind, but nice little glue in this Please Stop album.

JR & the Neo Candy-Landers-
I really like this. Hey kick ass solo! This music sounds like the lyrical content should be the carnival ride song. Maybe not. I’m coming around, I like the carnival ride music for the relationship lyrics. Yeah this is brilliant! VOTE. This tune really suits your vocals.

Jonathon Mann-
One of my favorite song fighters. This is wonderful. The melody sometimes flirts with the girl from ipanema. The chorus where the music cuts out then comes in is my favorite part. This is just cool! The orchestration reminds me of Spinto Band and the Magnetic Fields. BIG VOTE! This is my favorite of the fight so far. I wish I could hear a new song from you every day!

Metaluna- I read all your disclaimers before I sat down and critically listened. I don’t hear the Radiohead. I do hear the Queen of the Reich and Metallica. With all of your tones in the first minute, it sounds Marillion Misplaced Childhood. The Metallica guitarmonies are my favorite parts. I have to say I really dislike the whole drum experience of this song. They sound lagging to me, behind the beat. But they are the beat, so maybe all other instruments are ahead of the beat. The hi-hat part is especially disconcerting. Lots of potential! I look forward to a finished song from you. I don’t think this holds up as an instrumental, and it doesn’t sound like that was the intention. It’s a decent demo.

Mister Mann- Your voice sounds like Page! The melody is very Rift. OK back to reviews, I went on a Phish jag on You Tube. Well I like how this reminds me of Phish, it doesn’t really sound much like Phish, other than the vocals. This song is OK, it reminds me of an awesome song. The chorusy organ is cool, although I think it needs to carry less of the weight. I’d like to hear guitar and prominent bass. The drums are out of left field for this track. Some good ideas, doesn’t work for me as a whole.

Ross Durand- This is good. Would you be insulted if I called this self derivative? The melody reminds me of your 911 was an inside job track. The acoustic jam instrumentation is wonderful. Your voice is perfect. You get an A+ on performance. The lyrics are good, but not great. The songwriting (music) is rather uninspiring; I guess it’s the genre. A 12-bar is always a 12-bar. It will always be 145. I enjoy the playing immensely. I enjoy your voice too. I just can’t vote for it, sorry.

Scrap Heap- Cheesy hand clap, and annoying guide vocal bring down the charm of this. I like your 1st verse lyrics. The music is a bit sparse. Sounds like a good foundation, could use some lead guitar or lead violin or lead kazoo, basically a lead instrument. Ouch, lyrical violation “a song is a verse and chorus” yikes, please edit that out. Then there’s a meta song violations. The song is rather samey. Seems like it should be 2 minutes. Seems like you had a good 1st verse then ran out of time or ideas. Some potential, I’d like to hear a more developed entry.

Soap Yourself- This would be more relevant 10 years ago. Thank you for “writing this song”. For Hell sakes don’t ever do that again! We know you wrote this song. Vocals are super hot. The mix is way off. The drums are sloppy. I’d much rather listen to Sunny Day, Bright Eyes, and any other emo band, even the 2nd tier Get Up Kids or Gloria Record. Anyway, you can write a song. It’s pretty generic. The production leaves much to be desired. I bet this will be a throw away effort in your catalog. However writing songs, even bad ones, can be a good exercise and learning experience.

State Shirt- Dude! You’re on fire! Great track! Even more impressive is the time to make a video. Love the video BTW! It’s nice to see something other than your awesome studio. This is a very cohesive song. I guess my biggest criticism is the ending. I think it could be a lot huger. Ends with a wimper, but beautiful sound scape with some great vocals. Easily gets a vote. Well done!

Stucco Lobster Bread Box- Funny novelty song. This seriously needs a proper recording. The song writing is cute in that Dr Demento way. This is really hard to listen to though. That hiss is killing me. Is it me or does this chord pattern remind you of the Berkeley Social Scene “Frostbite”? Please investigate improving your recording techniques. I can’t really subject others to this sound quality, but I’d like other people to hear this song.

Tobin’s Spirit Guide- Not a bad recording. Pretty dumb song. I’d give you a C if you were improvising. It sounds thought out however, and you can do much better. Poor use of the F-bomb and A-Hole. This is just weak and uninspired. But I like your voice, and it sounds like you can craft a song OK. Spend more time and emotion on some lyrics, and maybe it won’t be so forgettable.

Wages- Some really sour notes man. Nice passion, but it’s all pretty sloppy. I think you need more practice before you hit the record button. Your voice is bigger than the thin drums and guitar and bass behind you. Not into this. I like how you really sing, but I don’t dig this song.

Weakest Suit- I’m going to give you a thumbs up, good job, but no vote. I enjoy this. Good lyrics, great melody. Like a lot of you GnG’s they sound like very promising demos, and make me eagerly anticipate the full band treatment that never happens. BTW a year ago I ripped off one of your melodies for the BSS “We Keep Them Alive” The chorus sounds like Weakest Suit to me, but in digging through your stuff I can’t figure out exactly what song I ripped off. If you can figure it out I’d be curious to know. I often sing the “Stop Drop and Roll” song to my kids (along with an acoustic) , I really want them to know what to do if they catch on fire. Anyway, good song man!

Who The Frak’s Berkeley Biker Scene?- Interesting backing music. The nerdcore rap is not my thing at all. The flow is terrible for the Yank and the Brit. The girl isn’t great but not terrible. The backing music cracks me up.

Berkeley Social Scene- To be honest, we’re deep in our FAWM album. When we started working on the song called “Please Stop” I didn’t realize this was a dual purpose song. Luckily we went more pop and kept it under 4 minutes. The lyrics are written by none other than Niveous. We had a President’s Day afternoon writing session with Lunkhead, Martyr, and myself. (no Ken). We wrote the music then: We jammed for a while. Martyr liked my opening riff and wrote some cool arpeggios over it. The surf Part B of the chorus is a compromise between martyr and myself, his chords, my treatment. Martyr was struggling with how to deal with the 5 line stanza. I suggested the Furry pedro like fast strum punch for “message of discontent”. Then for the chorus, I suggestd the punches, but I think Lunkhead had the best idea of the song with the one beat rest after “please stop, please stop”. Then bridge/solo groove was a play on Martyrs chorus that I shot down and then recycled. Ken came in the next day and the 3 of us (no Lunkhead) threw down all the tracks. Mostly live as a trio. The guitar solo, the vocals, and the keys are overdubbed. I think martyr did some excellent vocal work on this one. My solo has a good beginning but I don’t like how I ended it. Ken actually took my 3 attempts and comped the ending a bit. It sounds better than any of my pure takes, but I wish I had more time to improve the solo. I’ll redo it for the FAWM album. Ken of course kicked as with drums, keys and mixing.

Excellent fight people!
Votes go to:

Berkeley Social Scene
State Shirt
Jonathon Mann
JR & the Neo CandyLanders
Christopher Cogott
BLT & the Hoblits
Architects of Desire
Phillipso, Older Brothers, Semolina Pilchards, Zipline , Thank Glennny for the Frisbee, The Odoriferous Valley, The Worldly Self Assurance, Berkeley Social Scene, Very Gentle Knives, Daddy Bop Swing Set, GUNS, The Kraken Lives, Cavedwellers
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Billy's Little Trip
Odie
Posts: 12000
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Instruments: Guitar, Bass, Vocals, Drums, Skin Flute
Recording Method: analog to digital via Presonus FireBox, Cubase and a porn machine
Submitting as: Billy's Little Trip, Billy and the Psychotics
Location: Cali fucking ornia

Re: Please Stop! No, I mean it. Please Stop (reviews)

Post by Billy's Little Trip »

Hoblit wrote:BLT y el Joblitos
You've been dying to use that band name, haven't you. :lol:

And thanks to everyone for the reviews. I've listened to all of the songs and I am impressed by the creativity as well as the advancements in production. Like Hobz mentioned, the mighty SF has pushed me to put out better quality music in the short deadline. Some are duds, but it just pushes me harder. So it appears the same is true for many. But don't ever let that stop those that haven't gotten there yet, to not submit your music. Because a good song is a good song no matter how minimal the production. LML is evidence to this fact. In fact, I think too much production would probably hurt her groove.

Anyway, live, love, rock!
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bettingonthemuse
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Re: Please Stop! No, I mean it. Please Stop (reviews)

Post by bettingonthemuse »

Spud wrote:Take a hint.
I would but I'm not good at taking hints.
scrapheap
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Re: Please Stop! No, I mean it. Please Stop (reviews)

Post by scrapheap »

glennny wrote:Scrap Heap- Cheesy hand clap, and annoying guide vocal bring down the charm of this. I like your 1st verse lyrics. The music is a bit sparse. Sounds like a good foundation, could use some lead guitar or lead violin or lead kazoo, basically a lead instrument. Ouch, lyrical violation “a song is a verse and chorus” yikes, please edit that out. Then there’s a meta song violations. The song is rather samey. Seems like it should be 2 minutes. Seems like you had a good 1st verse then ran out of time or ideas. Some potential, I’d like to hear a more developed entry.
It's "a song isn't words and chorus -- it takes a heartbeat to make it real," and the song is about a former bandmate, hence references to making music. Still, all criticism is valid criticism, and I'll keep in mind that such lines may be misheard as literal admissions of running out of ideas (which would be way cheesy). You're right there's a lead missing, esp. in the instrumental "chorus." All the piano stuff was supposed to be played by hand, but I realized I didn't have the chops, sequenced it instead and got lazy about adding embellishments. Also, I kept the vocals I had recorded to my own loose playing, which is why they're so off at the end.

Hoblit, wasn't familiar with Fluffy Porcupine's stuff. I maybe hear a little similarity in his "Listen Close"...
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thebreadbox
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Submitting as: Stucco Lobster Breadbox
Location: Newark, DE / Linwood, PA

Re: Please Stop! No, I mean it. Please Stop (reviews)

Post by thebreadbox »

Hey, all!

Thanks for the feedback.

I would like to apologize for the sound quality on my entry, and a few more forthcoming. At this point, I've only got the microphone on our laptop to record with. So, I'll definitely sound far away and tinny... at least until I can move to a 4 track, or anything better than playing a kid's Yamaha Portasounds right next to the computer's pick-up.

I'll at least switch the instruments next time, so I don't cause any more inadvertent earbleeds.

I'm even worse at critical reviews than I am at sound production... but, if I could, I'd give everyone a vote, except for the Weakest Suit, who would get two votes. At first, I thought that their submission was aiming for an instructional song for kindergartners. And then came the second verse... sheer absurdity. I laughed until I cried. Funny, funny stuff.
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