The itsy bitsy Spuder went up the PRECIPITATION review spout

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Billy's Little Trip
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The itsy bitsy Spuder went up the PRECIPITATION review spout

Post by Billy's Little Trip »

...down came the songs and washed the Spuder out.
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chocolatechips
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Re: The itsy bitsy Spuder went up the PRECIPITATION review s

Post by chocolatechips »

first time back in a long while ! on my first quick listen through I dig the song from New Image the most; it reminds me of The Who. Zjaye's track is pretty cool too. The BSS track has some nice bits. I'll listen through more before doing some full reviews.
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skypup
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Re: The itsy bitsy Spuder went up the PRECIPITATION review s

Post by skypup »

First fight! Woo! Just a little something this time but I'm already working on a full song for next week. It's going to be epic. Better bring your A-game!

Here are some reviews:

Berkely Social Scene
Pretty cool stuff. I like it. Especially the little weird section from 2:20 onwards. Apart from that, the simple arrangement works well. Instruments all have great tone. The bass sounds awesome.

Billy & The Psychotics
FUCK YEAH! I love this song. I feel like I'm listening to a long lost song from the 90s. Dangerous, angry guitars and awesome vocals. Nailed it.
VOTE

The Chocolate Chips
The instrumentation is pretty fun. It's a happy little song. I like the slow, spaced out bit from 0:48. I like this song. Oh, and "preciptation makes me wet" hehe.

Flvxxvm Florvm
Rocking out! Nice! Oh shit, organ solo. Are those spoons? That was an awesome three and a half minutes of my life. Yes!

Foobar
I didn't really enjoy the bits with singing (sorry dude). However, the instrumental from 1:17 sounded epic. I really enjoyed that. Build up was dramatic and the pay off was worth it. Nicely done.

Ghost Pup
My little song. My favourite things about this are the percussive noises I made with my mouth. Other instruments include jars of water, sticks, driftwood, egg shaker, bass and my hands. Fun times.
VOTE

Glenny
Hey, this is really cool. Right, from the start I love the instrumentation. Love that double bass sound. I really like these lyrics. Might as well make stuff up. Oh shit, duelling flute and guitar while the bass just does it's thing in the background! Awesome! That was incredibly cool.
VOTE

Hairy Bottoms and the Trio Mysterioso
Sweet, more cool jazzy stuff. Did not expect the scary narrator. This is creepy. I really like it. The guitar does some cool stuff in the background. Nice, glad I heard that.

Hoops
Love the heavy scale-like riff. When it ends it makes everything sound really floaty in it's absence. Cool effect. Then the wicked solo. Very wicked. Vocals weren't bad but they didn't manage to sound as awesome as the music. Music was epic and epic vocals would have taken the song to the next level. Reminds me a little of Faith No More's final album. Very cool.

James Owens
This isn't really my thing but it is very well done for what it is. Well performed and it sounds lovely. It was an enjoyable listen. Thank you for that.

TRJones
I want to sit back with a beer to listen to this again. Nice, laid back tune. Nodding along to that bass. The occaisonal little mistakes in the guitar playing are very endearing. I think I heard you say "I should have planted fish". That is a fun lyric! Lovely. I enjoyed that a lot.

John Lampson
This all sounds pretty solid but for some reason or other it just didn't grab me. I like how heavy it sounds at the start and the ending is pretty cool.

Whoever it was that rapped
Sounds like you guys had fun with this. The funky little guitar was pretty cool. Energy was cool. Your rhymes are kind of dorky. Make that very dorky. That was a fun few minutes but I will never listen to this again.

Micah Sommersmith
Acapella intro was cool. Synth-western! Cool! A fun little jaunt.

New Image
Now this is cool. I'd go to your show and have a lot of fun. Fun lo-fi alt rock. I like it.

WreckdoM
Oh YES! Love that heavy WreckdoM sound. Hahahha at these vocals. This is just a massive ball of fun. And now a super heavy breakdown. This shit is too funny. And now you are barking at some dogs. For a very long time. Fuck.
VOTE???

Zjaye
Wow, very different from the last song I listened to. I'm not sure how to review this. I'm afraid that this really isn't my thing. This sounds like something my 14 year old sister would enjoy. Sounds pretty slick. Everything is performed well and the mix sounds good.

Good songs everyone! That was a lot of fun!
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Re: The itsy bitsy Spuder went up the PRECIPITATION review s

Post by jlampson »

Berkeley Social Scene
Catchy intro, especially with the extra beats thrown in “for good measure”. Very clear sounds and good mix. I really enjoy the doubled octaves throughout. I’m voting for this one.


Billy and the Psychotics
I had high hopes after reading a review talking how this sound likes a long-lost 90’s song and it didn’t disappoint. Great mix and the parts-based method is something I always appreciate. Really good layering on the vocals and sweet breakdown with bass harmonics. I would pay money to go see this band play but since I can’t vote with my dollar on this one, I’ll vote the old-fashioned way and just vote.

The Chocolate Chips
Very sweet-sounding song but nothing set it apart from the others enough for me to vote on it. I did like the synth section, but that kind of made this sound like two separate songs. The call and response was cool, too. I’m not sure what to offer in terms of constructive criticism here on first listen. Perhaps to vary the song without varying it too much?

Flvxxvm Florvm
Right away, you’ve got us hooked with a great groove and some aggressive-sounding guitars. Very classic rock with maybe even a Doors-sounding vocal style. The drums really propel the song forward. From a mix perspective, I’d say work on getting your vocals and lead guitar to sit a little better. They’re great parts, it’s just that they tend to sound like they are too in my face. It’s a tricky thing to get right, I admit, but I think it would help blend your song even better. The breakdown with the organ solo is also very stylistically-fitting. And distorted bass? Very jammy in a good way. The second solo actually blends a little better. Overall, very good. I’m voting for this one.

Foobar
Nice-sounding song but the vocals sounded flat (not in a pitch way, just not very exciting). I’d like to hear more energy from the them. The instrumental portion of the song is very well done and nicely balanced. The vocals at the start of the second section start to sound more energetic and then kind of fade, almost like you were trying to be really quiet. It’s a shame I can’t connect with this song’s vocals because I really like all the other stuff you’ve done in it. I’d suggest working on getting more of “you” into your singing and I think it would make a big difference. (See my review of my own song below for something about this.)

Ghost Pup
I really like the variety of percussive sounds in this one. To me, there isn’t anything very special about it but it serves as a nice interlude between songs and does, in fact, sound like rain dripping into things. On that note, I think I’ll vote for this one.

glennny
What a happy-sounding song! I read the lyrics and love the Jack Handy references, too. The brush kit, walking bass, and the vocal harmonies also add to the mood. Vocally, it’s just okay, but the lyrics and the fun mood you’ve created overcome that and I’m voting for it.

Harry Bottoms and the Trio Mysterioso
Oh, wow, this is very fitting for the band name. Is that Harry or one of the Trio I hear on the narrative? Although it’s unique and instrumentally very good, I see it more as a novelty track. Sometimes that can be effective, but it doesn’t stick it to me in this case

Hoops
Is that “A Dream Theater Christmas” at the beginning? I mean that as a compliment. My first suggestion is from a mix perspective to get the vocals to blend a little more. They sit a bit too up top, in my opinion. I like the modulation and the overall mood. This is also a good example of a song shift that sounds like it belongs in the same song. Cool solo, nicely blended, with some super-crazy vibrato and guitar harmonies – oh cool! I’d be interested to hear what your influences were because you’ve got some cool, trippy stuff, that flows better than one would think it should. You’ve got my vote.

James Owens
One thing that I enjoy about listening to these submissions is the variety of styles. There’s an intimacy about this song that is really very touching and that’s the main reason I’m voting for it. I would like to hear a more-present vocal in the mix, but the lyrics are still easy to make out. Thank you for that!

Jeebas Jones
Nice build up and instrumentation in the intro. My girlfriend says it sounds like early Wilco, which is a compliment. The acoustic sounds kind of honky and ratty in all the right places. Lyrically, it’s very quirky and I dig that. And you get a vote

John Lampson
I don’t know if this is breaking tradition, but I’m not going to vote for my own song. I think the premise I started with was decent but the execution didn’t live up to it. It was an exceptionally busy week in work and life and I just wanted to submit “something”, even if it wasn’t done. I recorded the second verse when I was trying to be quiet and therefore it doesn’t have the energy the first one did. Then, it just kind of peters out and doesn’t go anywhere else, when it really needed some sort of hook or something. I feel like it sounds good, and the lyrics I had were alright, but it needs something more. If this were someone else’s song, I probably wouldn’t vote for it, either.

The Lookouts with Danny O'
Very funny! I expressed earlier how I felt about novelty songs, but this is something different from that. I felt the funky guitar chord stabs should have been a little more dry to fit in properly. I’ll say that I can’t see myself listening to this through a second time, though, but I do like what you did on it with all the little musical elements (and even the non-musical ones!) and it was a fun first listen. It was also cool to hear the rhythm going off kilter around the 2:30 mark. It’s weird, because even though I don’t like this that much, I feel compelled to vote for it and I look forward to hearing what else you have under your sleeves!

Micah Sommersmith
I would have liked to hear something more done with the acapella-style intro and something vocal done. I do like what you did in the second, longer part, but even though it reminds me of some of my early recordings, it doesn’t catch enough of my interest for me to vote. I do think you can do more cool things, though, so keep ‘em coming!

New Image
Ratty guitar, alright! And a straight-ahead punk vibe. I’d bump those vocals up a bit, though, if it were me. They have a Glenn Phillips vibe to them, which should be taken as a compliment. I like the feel a lot on this and there’s some sort of digital shimmer throughout that’s pretty cool! Nice breakdown and guitar solo. Those backup vocals are also super cool. Nice job! I even love how the vocals distort at the end.

WreckdoM
This sounds like a bunch of friends all buzzing on Mountain Dew in their dad’s basement. In short, I’m voting for it! I would like to be able to understand more of the lyrics but that’s probably how some people felt about grunge bands and the Dixie Chicks. That breakdown is pretty kickass, too, with all sorts of feedbacky goodness. I’m a little thrown by you all barking and squealing but I’m willing to let that slide since it fits the vibe of this song pretty damn well. What a bizarre song!

Zjaye
Very synth-pop and well done. I do like the tone of the singer’s voice. Emotionally, though, it doesn’t really hit me and, as cool as it is, it doesn’t seem to take off. There are some parts, too, where the doubling of the vocals doesn’t quite match and even clashes in an atonal way that doesn’t suit this style of music, where everything is usually very clean and precise.
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Re: The itsy bitsy Spuder went up the PRECIPITATION review s

Post by AJOwens »

Lots of good ones in this fight. If I vote for all the ones I like, the way it says in the instructions, it might be more than half of them. There's nothing wrong with that, though, is there?

Berkeley Social Scene -- Tuneful, with good vocals and harmonies, and delicate, open, well-balanced arrangements. The shifting focus of the rhythms is engrossing, although it seems to keeps the song from finding a groove.

Billy and the Psychotics -- Tight and engaging performance, punchy rhythms. I'm getting a taste of Cake, first detected in the low guitar lines, but also influencing the bass and drums. I didn't get that until the third listen though. I also noticed a Hendrix reference near the end (Third Stone from the Sun) -- was that deliberate? It's a cool, modern sound, and the singer gives it a lot of personality.

The Chocolate Chips -- Fairly straightforward, likeable melody in the verse; the words are sometimes noticeably, unnaturally drawn out. Great psychedelic developments around the minute mark. The chorus has the potential to be hooky, but would need more dazzle in the background.

Flvxxvm Florvm -- Grotty texture. Snappy drums keep it lively. The melody, chords, and arrangement start to feel a bit limited at about the 1:30 mark. The drawbar organ adds some welcome colour, could have been used more.

Foobar -- Crisp., The buildup around 0:40 let me down a bit, and in general something is not letting this song burst forth the way it should -- though it gets better. This is a fine composition. The vocals could use more personal presence or dynamism, and the whole thing needs more oomph somehow. I'd like to say something more helpful than that, but as you know, I sometimes have the same problem. The song itself is of a quality that demands more of the presentation.

Ghost Pup -- Needs more cowbell! Sorry, old SNL joke. Seriously, I like the elemental percussion, but it's like most of the tracks were on mute when you mastered it. The bass line is nothing to write home about, and there are no lyrics, so this one is going to be a hard sell.

glennny -- Smooth and jazzy, which I get the feeling is your passion. You do it extremely well. Nice playing on all instruments, notably the walking bass. Good flute. Intriguing jumpy strings.

Harry Bottoms and the Trio Mysterioso -- The intimate, threatening telephone voice brings great film-noir atmosphere to a satisfying free-form progression. More good jazz bass; lovely guitar, notably the illustration of snow near the end. Sounds like some pretty good poetry going on too. Well done.

Hoops -- Another one with good atmosphere. Nice change-ups and contrasts in the rhythms, while maintaining a consistent feel throughout. The chords are fairly simple, but outstandingly decorated by the busy, thoughtfully designed riffs. I like this one a lot.

James Owens -- The genre is not my thing at all, even though I wrote it. Does that happen to other people? On the upside, my wife likes it, which makes spending hours on my Song Fight hobby just that much easier. I added flute because everybody seems to like the flute, but it produced unintended hints of "Color My World."

Jeebas Jones -- Crosses up vaudeville and folk in a pleasing way. The singing is engaging. The song has an easygoing, rocking lilt, the guitar picking is comfortable and personable, the bass plays its humble part responsibly, and the words rise up to a place where I occasionally notice them, which is rare for me. Evocative.

John Lampson -- Slap echo on the guitar is well placed. The singing connects, but it's a little pitchy here and there. The breakdown around 1:15 almost loses its way, but then recovers well. Too short -- seems like you just got started. The overall effect is of two song fragments loosely stitched together, and I never got the measure of either of them.

The Lookouts with Danny O' -- The rap sounds more or less authentic to me. Rhythms are right, pronunciation maybe not so urban. Love the ducks. The band has ragged edges that give it real personality (OK, the drums need practice). Obviously you're having a good time, but not just to entertain yourselves; there's an outward character of sharing with the audience that I appreciate.

Micah Sommersmith -- This is looking like an instrumental with a short vocal introduction. Some good work went into those harmonies, duly acknowledged, but any association this bit has with the rest of the song is purely arbitrary. If the vocal intro worked the same riff somehow, that would seriously count. Speaking of which, I like the way you develop the guitar line around the chord changes. The overall sound is good too. But is it not an instrumental? Hmm.

New Image -- Nice groove. The mix is kind of tinny. There's bass, but no midrange, and some competition between the instruments in the high mids. The vocals and lead guitar help fill it out a bit. As for the music, the arrangement and all the parts add up to a great sixties radio sound. Authentic right down to the heavy-gauge string bending. Brilliant. OK, now I get the tinniness.

WreckdoM -- Very grungy. There's lots going on at all times. This has decided manic power. I could wish for a better recording, but it sounds like I'm listening through a thick fog of quaaludes, which kind of works too.

Zjaye -- -- A warm, intimate, rather hypnotic sound, with lively, shifting variations and breakdowns. Good vocals, cool chorus. Sometimes the vocals drop down to a murmur; the relaxed quality is good, but needs a little adjustment to remain audible. The overtracked voice at the end needs a different treatment to separate it -- a different octave, or a different EQ, or a different ambience, or something.
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EvelBist
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Re: The itsy bitsy Spuder went up the PRECIPITATION review s

Post by EvelBist »

As AJ said, there's a lot to like in the ingredients this week.

Berkeley Social Scene
Overall, a very very nice piece. lots of changes and great instrumentation. Every time I hear your art, I'm totally transported to a Grateful Dead feel. From the lyrics (sit around the coffee shop) to the rhythm guitar work and the doubled and tripled vocals, it evokes the Dead. It even raises them. I can see you playing in a bar covering their tunes, even though you could do a whole set of your own work and the deadHeads wouldn't know the difference. It's Ken on vocals this time right? (tell me if I'm wrong). I'm a big fan of his. This is quite up to par and maybe even a birdie. *

Billy and the Psychotics
Super cool intro - distorted sustain and sloppy (obviously on purpose) sliding around. Then your vocalist has the right spitting-spite to carry the feel. I like the bass very much. I also like the flow works - like being on a wave. You could easily get over on an alternative (college) radio playlist with this. Why not send it to one or a hundred? *

The Chocolate Chips
Your style is so yours that you don't even need a subscription to LifeLock. You are a master of autotune, and it so fits into the mix. You are also a master mixer. Everything has a place and there's nothing extraneous IMO. I realize this is your first time back in while and a bit rusty (like in the bridge, where it lost the flow for a while) and the end (its somewhat sudden and doesn't fit. Nevertheless, the execution and happy feel I always get from your songs mean I like it - and since its a free country (for now) - I vote for it. *

Flvxxvm Florvm
I believe 'manic' was used previously in description, however, if the tune fits ... Now, my restless leg syndrome was aggravated by this. Even the somewhat out of sync lead solo, and breakdown before the toy organ came in, they all FIT the song. Now the wah guitar is great. And the dry vocals are super great, they work with the 'manic' feel. *

Foobar
Pop seeps into a songfight. The intro is great, and you have a great voice. But try to lower the instrumentation so the vocals come out on top better. They do seem buried. Now I can't put it in words, because its a sense thing, but the energy that the intro created dissipated with the out of sync vocals. Now I'm sure some of that loss came from the vocals being buried. I think its a good tune, but it suffers from wandering around - again, I cant put it in words exactly because its a feeling thing - there is no intuitiveness to the flow. It's just me, but I like a structure that seems to flow from one part to another. All the pieces are there, but they're used too many times and not in the right order.

Ghost Pup
Mooooo. I went to the barn and milked Elsie while playing this and she liked it.

glennny
I always enjoy your songs. Your style is eclectically unique. Of course I hear your influences, but the continual use of different sounds (flute, synth, ukelele, strings) and the way you sit them in your tune is refreshing and intriguing from week to week. I didn't always appreciate what you bring to songfight, but that has changed. IMHO, you are one of the stars around here. *

Harry Bottoms and the Trio Mysterioso
Ok, right off the bat I'm chuckling. I have a friend you remind me of. He's from chicago, and always has a greasy sheen about him. If Michael Savage cut a record, this might be it. In fact, are you him? Stream of consciousness lyrics or were they given to you by a bowery bum? Either way a vote for the uniqueness of sound and style. *

Hoops
This dominates my head so much that I couldn't even start thinking about it technically until about a minute and a half into it. By then it was really cooking. You slipped the keys in there so smoothly and effectively that I didn't notice until they were working their magic. Then I was disappointed that they ended and wanted to chastise you but the doubled guitar work took that away and I was pacified for a while. Then the chorus comes back and soothes me again. If this tune was a woman she would be a bitch who sends you home every time with blue balls. But you always go back for more. *

James Owens
Mr Owens, you have an operatic soothing style that persists from fight to fight. However, one soon learns that the sanitary baritone belies the devious sly dude hiding within. This may not be your best, but its not bad either. I can't find anything annoying about it stylistically, maybe its a ~bit~ long, but still pleasant in a devious way. *

Jeebas Jones
Nice fingerpicking to start with. Vocals are pleasant, kind of a higher pitched Grant Lee Buffalo. Sort of either one of those songs that don't evoke much interest or take it all depending on the mood. I think if this is your chosen style, try to tighten up the bass and guitar. You sing well enough, because they have to carry the tune. But it needs more energy, maybe a washboard or harmonies, or maybe a slightly faster BPM.

John Lampson
The vocals and tune are good, if a bit buried. The lyrical "...aster" is a clever hook too. The song just peters out, and didn't really get going though. It sounds like you were going somewhere but lost interest.

The Lookouts with Danny O'
I don't know why because I don't like rap. But I'm listening to the lyrics, and that's why I'm smiling. The out of sync drums and scratching detract though. Ok, now I'm actually laughing out loud at the goofiness of it. If only for the clever lyrics and their delivery a vote. *

Micah Sommersmith
Amen. Those vocals are out of the way and we can get on with the song. Why couldn't you plant some lyrics over the top of the guitar/keys? They are crying for some lyrical embellishment, though they are quite good standing alone.

New Image
I tuned down a half step and was able to hit the high notes here. My goal was to go retro, something Motown-ish. But I'm a white boy so my harmonies sound like the beach boys. It turned out to be a "Motown meets Redondo Beach" rendition. I tried to get the lyrics to be a full banana split, but I slipped on the banana peel.

WreckdoM
The instrumentation is overdriven. But your vocals (even though I can't make them out) have an interesting bounce to them. What else can I say when there are rabid barking dogs in my ear?

Zjaye
From the first listen, this is my favorite of this fight. I like the vocalist's stylistic delivery and produced bits and hooks. This is a submission one either likes or doesn't but brooks no criticism regarding its production. I for one like it. **
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Billy's Little Trip
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Re: The itsy bitsy Spuder went up the PRECIPITATION review s

Post by Billy's Little Trip »

AJOwens wrote: Billy and the Psychotics -- Tight and engaging performance, punchy rhythms. I'm getting a taste of Cake, first detected in the low guitar lines, but also influencing the bass and drums. I didn't get that until the third listen though. I also noticed a Hendrix reference near the end (Third Stone from the Sun) -- was that deliberate? It's a cool, modern sound, and the singer gives it a lot of personality.
Neither were deliberate, but I certainly hear it now that you mention it. That's pretty cool! I was really trying to float the guitar over a punchy groove and of course, DJ pulled it all together nicely with her awesome vocal style.

You know how sometimes while you're working on a song, you don't really listen to it with listener's ears until it's done? I thought the intro lead guitar I was floating over the rhythm kind of referenced the intro to that old song American Woman and thought someone would mention that. Maybe more of the tone and distortion than anything.
Thanks for the review, AJ. ;)
EvelBist wrote:Billy and the Psychotics
Super cool intro - distorted sustain and sloppy (obviously on purpose) sliding around. Then your vocalist has the right spitting-spite to carry the feel. I like the bass very much. I also like the flow works - like being on a wave. You could easily get over on an alternative (college) radio playlist with this. Why not send it to one or a hundred? *
Like being on a big wave.....I like that metaphor. I was trying to give it a floaty feel, so that sums it up nicely. Thanks, EB.
skypup wrote:Billy & The Psychotics
FUCK YEAH! I love this song. I feel like I'm listening to a long lost song from the 90s. Dangerous, angry guitars and awesome vocals. Nailed it.
VOTE
Thanks, pup! I guess we just can't hide that 90s love no matter how hard we try to make our alternative blues rock style relevant for today. :)
jlampson wrote:Billy and the Psychotics
I had high hopes after reading a review talking how this sound likes a long-lost 90’s song and it didn’t disappoint. Great mix and the parts-based method is something I always appreciate. Really good layering on the vocals and sweet breakdown with bass harmonics. I would pay money to go see this band play but since I can’t vote with my dollar on this one, I’ll vote the old-fashioned way and just vote.
Interesting that you picked up on the bass harmonics. I told DJ that it's one of those cool creative things that's taken for granted as just being part of the soundscape. But you actually pointed it out, so that makes me happy. It's nice when the details are appreciated. Thanks, J!
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glennny
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Re: The itsy bitsy Spuder went up the PRECIPITATION review s

Post by glennny »

EvelBist wrote:
...It's Ken on vocals this time right? (tell me if I'm wrong).

You're not exactly wrong. I was the guy singing into the microphone (glennny), but Ken produced and mixed. So all of Ken's studio magic went into the vocals. That's why it sounds phenomenally better than the glennny track. As for the Dead, I am a huge fan, and even more of a Phish head than a Dead head, but I do love them too. It being the Bay area there is sooo much Dead influence around us.
EvelBist also wrote:
Your style is eclectically unique.....
and many other super nice things.
Wow man, thanks! Very kind! When I do solo submissions I feel free to be super risky, and uncool. The running joke in the band (BSS) is that I have no taste, I kind of love everything so I rely on the other guys to reject things that suck. So when solo, I'm entertaining myself, and all I can do is hope that someone else likes what I come up with, but it's fine if you don't.

cheers!
Phillipso, Older Brothers, Semolina Pilchards, Zipline , Thank Glennny for the Frisbee, The Odoriferous Valley, The Worldly Self Assurance, Berkeley Social Scene, Very Gentle Knives, Daddy Bop Swing Set, GUNS, The Kraken Lives, Cavedwellers
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AJOwens
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Re: The itsy bitsy Spuder went up the PRECIPITATION review s

Post by AJOwens »

Billy's Little Trip wrote:I thought the intro lead guitar I was floating over the rhythm kind of referenced the intro to that old song American Woman and thought someone would mention that. Maybe more of the tone and distortion than anything.
Yes, I see that now. The tone and distortion, and the major third.
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jlampson
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Re: The itsy bitsy Spuder went up the PRECIPITATION review s

Post by jlampson »

I appreciate all the reviews and feedback (not just for me but for everyone else). To me, this is a way we can all improve on our creations and even have some fun! Seems like it's normal to comment on your reviews, so I'll see what that's like!
skypup wrote: John Lampson
This all sounds pretty solid but for some reason or other it just didn't grab me. I like how heavy it sounds at the start and the ending is pretty cool.
Thanks for listening - I think I did have a good idea at the beginning but I ran out of time, really. I just wanted to get something submitted.

jlampson wrote:John Lampson
I don’t know if this is breaking tradition, but I’m not going to vote for my own song. I think the premise I started with was decent but the execution didn’t live up to it. It was an exceptionally busy week in work and life and I just wanted to submit “something”, even if it wasn’t done. I recorded the second verse when I was trying to be quiet and therefore it doesn’t have the energy the first one did. Then, it just kind of peters out and doesn’t go anywhere else, when it really needed some sort of hook or something. I feel like it sounds good, and the lyrics I had were alright, but it needs something more. If this were someone else’s song, I probably wouldn’t vote for it, either.
This jlampson guy is a joke. I mean where does he get off? Wait, that's me. Um, he's right.
AJOwens wrote:Lots of good ones in this fight. If I vote for all the ones I like, the way it says in the instructions, it might be more than half of them. There's nothing wrong with that, though, is there?

John Lampson -- Slap echo on the guitar is well placed. The singing connects, but it's a little pitchy here and there. The breakdown around 1:15 almost loses its way, but then recovers well. Too short -- seems like you just got started. The overall effect is of two song fragments loosely stitched together, and I never got the measure of either of them.
I felt the same way; there were just a lot of well-written pieces submitted. Hear, hear!

I had to go back and actually look at my recording session to confirm, but I used only EQ and compression on the guitars. That syncopatd "duh-duh" you hear is all me (and 1 acoustic and 3 electric guitar tracks). As for the song itself, I'm not very happy with it and I wouldn't have submitted it as an album cut, but I at least wanted to get something IN and get started. That's part of what I'm digging about Song Fight! is that it's motivation to write and record and mix and submit.

Vocally, yes, it's pretty much first takes. The first is better than the second, for sure, too; they were on different days and one was late at night. "Bedroom vocals" rarely turn out good, even though this is actually in my living room.
EvelBist wrote:As AJ said, there's a lot to like in the ingredients this week.
John Lampson
The vocals and tune are good, if a bit buried. The lyrical "...aster" is a clever hook too. The song just peters out, and didn't really get going though. It sounds like you were going somewhere but lost interest.
Yes, it does peter out, and it's not me that lost interest, really - I ran out of time!

A big thanks to all of you guys and gals and dudes and dames who have listened and may also in the future listen. I spent a lot more time on "The Quiet Storm" and am very happy with it. It sounds like a finished song with good performances, not like "Precipitation". I'm looking forward to future fights and hearing more of each of your works of...um, art? Just kidding. Bring it on!

John
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Re: The itsy bitsy Spuder went up the PRECIPITATION review s

Post by hoops »

I have listened to all the songs at least half a dozen times and am getting into them as an album. I genuinely like all of the songs and could have voted for them all, but I thought I should probably just vote for about half, so I did.


Berkeley Social Scene

Strong songwriting and arranging, catchy melodies over interesting chord sequences, lovely guitars, bass and vocals. The middle 8 is very odd and I'm not sure how well it would work if it were longer, but it's not longer, so it works well, breaks things up and provides a little variety. VOTE.


Billy And The Psychotics

This may not be a comparison you hear every day, but this reminds me a little (actually quite a lot) of the music on the "Lips 106" radio station in Grand Theft Auto 3, which I think was all original music written for the game. It wasn't quite as polished, production-wise, as the other stations which featured commercially-released artists, but it had great songs with great feeling and a very original-sounding female vocalist and it was my favourite station to listen to while playing that game. This would have fitted in perfectly on there. VOTE.


The Chocolate Chips

Great arrangement, bits and pieces coming and going and always keeping things interesting, very catchy melodies, unique vocals with great harmonies. Great middle section (or is that the chorus?) and I love the way the bass comes in after those huge, slightly sinister synth chords. VOTE.


Flvxxvm Florvm

Powerful riffs and urgent rhythms, crazy soloes - the organ solo is very reminiscent of Jon Lord. Maybe the whole song is quite Deep Purple-ish with a hint of Motorhead, which is no bad thing.


Foobar

Dang - all these songs are so catchy. This one is no exception and I find I have to repeat myself from previous comments about strong melodies and excellent chord sequences. I love the extended instrumental sections - great feeling and building dynamics and tension, excellent piano. I like the raw lead guitar sound though on occasions the rawness tended towards what I might have initially described as 'bum notes'. After a couple of listens, though, all the notes made sense to me. VOTE.


Ghost Pup

Some nice organic sounds and interesting rhythms in this, though there's not an awful lot of it. Listening to all the songs as an album, this makes a nice interlude between songs but it does feel like just that - an interlude.


Glennny

This is super and charming and lovely. Great gently jazzy feel makes it sound simple at first but there's some very interesting and original arrangement here with the synth and strings, genuinely amusing lyrics, nice melodies and excellent harmonies. Superb instrumental performances - gorgeous bass and flute in particular. VOTE.


Harry Bottoms and the Trio Mysterioso

Great jazzy backing and very dark narration - love the voice. It kind of all works together though I'm not sure what it aims to be - a song, an instrumental or some sort of soundtrack. I guess it probably doesn't matter if it sounds good, which it does.


Hoops

Well this is me. I was quite pleased with this - I had a very unproductive year musically and this was the first song I wrote since 15 songs in February (my seventh FAWM.org) so I was just pleased to get writing again. I admit it - I VOTEd for myself - that's quite normal, right?


James Owens

A very strong piece of songwriting, I think. It reminds me in several ways of Caravan or Hatfield And The North - the voice has the same gentle qualities as that of Richard Sinclair (who sang with both), the chord sequence and melody are reminiscent of those bands too - and that gorgeous flute. VOTE.


Jeebas Jones

More strong melodies and chords, great voice and vocal performance. Lovely guitar especially where it takes the melody. A relatively sparse arrangement but all strong so it doesn't really need anything else. VOTE.


John Lampson

Love those guitar chords and the driving rhythm. Nice melodies though a few of those vocal notes miss the mark a little and the voice gets a little lost in the mix towards the end. Interesting instrumental ending - more great guitar.


The Lookouts With Danny O

Given that much of this is quite minimal - just drums and voice - it would be a good idea if the vocals were a little louder and clearer - I found it quite hard to make out the lyrics. Great guitar when that comes in, and a great overall sound and feel.


Micah Sommersmith

Some really interesting ideas here, though the instrumental section doesn't feel like it naturally follows the a capella opening. Enjoyed it, though.


New Image

The bass is lost in the mix which is a shame as I think this would be doubly awesome if it were well mixed. Very catchy melodies and harmonies, driving rhythms and guitar. Almost doesn't get a vote because of the mix but dang it's so catchy I can't help but VOTE.


Wreckdom

This is just insane and hugely fun. Great over-the-top guitars and vocals and barking. Strong choruses in particular. Another pretty terrible mix (is it recorded live? fair enough if so) but it's so weird and awesome, how could I not vote? VOTE.

Zjaye

Great retro beats and synths, catchy melodies in the chorus especially, lovely vocals and guitar and an interesting arrangement.
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Re: The itsy bitsy Spuder went up the PRECIPITATION review s

Post by chocolatechips »

I kept trying to get the playlist to play in my winamp but it never would play without glitches - so I eventually tried going to the tracks directly and that seems to work. So finally my reviews. I want to mix in positive vibes with some helpful criticism so I'm going to include three things I like from each track and one thing that I think could be better. To make them a bit more interesting I'm going to rank them in order of my personal preference (no attempt at being objective.)

(ok - I think I finally finished)

New Image

+ Great guitar riffing.
+ The drums sound alright even though they are so drum machiney - maybe it's because of the overall sound of the track but they fit in better than it seems like they should.
+ Fantastic backing vocals (and the lead vocals are cool too.)
- The thin sound kind of works for this song but I'd still like to hear it with a thicker sound. I'd like to hear it go from the tinny sound into something full ... like "Exactly Where I'm At" by Ween.

Billy and the Psychotics

+ '90s alternative rock sound is done well here. Kind of reminds me of a couple of songs in particular but I can't quite place them.
+ Strong vocals. Some pretty catchy melodies.
+ Maybe the most "radio friendly" of any track this time around.
- I'm not the hugest fan of this style ... yet in a way that's still a positive because despite that I'm ranking it #2! Good stuff.

Jeebas Jones

+ Nice melodies with a strong vocal (lots of personality). I'm drawn into the vocals.
+ Great acoustic guitar, even with the little mistakes left in. Maybe even better because of them. They fit the feel.
+ Good lyrics.
- Sounds like a demo rather than a finished recording, but that can be quite charming (as it is here.)

Hoops

+ One of the more ambitious tracks this week (if not the most) ... I feel like I would need to listen to it more times to really get everything you've packed into this one.
+ Musicianship is great, production is tight. No obvious flaws to point out.
+ I really like the spacey "precipitation" bits.
- Vocals aren't bad, but not as good as the rest of it.

Harry Bottoms ...

+ I love the atmosphere. The drums & bass sound great.
+ The words were pretty hypnotizing. (as was the overall sound.)
+ Lots of fun stuff going on in the background. Not sure what to highlight, it was all cool.
- I'm not sure how well this would stand up to repeat listens or if I would want to hear more stuff in this vein. It's great for what it is, but I think I have a limited appetite for it.

James Owens

+ Really nice vocal. At first I thought you sounded vaguely like David Bowie but after listening to the whole song ... it seems you've got more of a gentle thing going on. Which is nice.
+ The flute is great. This is the second song I've heard this fight (see glennny) with a great flute bit! During the flute part I hear a bit of Moody Blues in there.
+ I think this could be a real grower. Even though it's not exactly my style (generally) I like it quite a bit and on my second listen like it more than the first. I don't mean this as a slight to other Song Fighters, but this sounds like a "real song" more so than most.
- While I think it's a grower, I don't think it really has a hooky enough melody to get most people to grow with it. Not sure about that. Also ... yes, it's very soft but that's alright.

glennny

+ I like the overall feel, the jazzy thing. It sounds good. Good musicianship, good production.
+ The instrumental flute breakdown thing is bad ass. I love that bit.
+ The demented synths that come in during the second half are quite unexpected and borderline insane. I love 'em.
- I don't like the lyrics, not sure what it is that puts me off about them - but they kind of make my skin itch! Otherwise it's possibly my favorite track of the week.

WreckdoM

+ Demented. I imagine you get these comparisons a lot: reminds me of Butthole Surfers & Ween.
+ Pretty catchy, especially considering how crazy it is.
? Sounds like it was recorded in a basement.
- Maybe goes on a bit too long. Not sure how many times I could listen to this even though I kind of really enjoyed it. Maybe it's one of those things that I would really enjoy in the right mood but would otherwise be kind of obnoxious (which is kind of how I feel about Butthole Surfers.)

Berkeley Social Scene

+ Clean, clear crisp mix. I like the separation on the guitar parts.
+ Both bass & drums are sounding pretty good too. I like the song quite a bit instrumentally.
+ The "we'll just sit here all alone and try to stay warm" bit (with the harmony) is my favorite.
- It never really grabs me vocally/melodically ... maybe I'm looking for the wrong thing with this song but it feels like it should be catchier or that it should be a bit more repetitive (in the right way.)

Zjaye

+ Some fun sounds here. Really clean and bright production.
+ I like how you mixed the vocal parts together towards the end (I did something similar in my track so you can see I like this idea.)
+ Even though the vocals don't quite carry it, I really like the melody during the chorus.
- Vocals are off at times and that hurts the song quite a lot. I think it would be a contender for my song of the week with stronger vocals. I think with this style of song you could definitely get away with quite a bit of vocal tuning!

Foobar

+ Nice arrangement. I like all of the details I'm hearing.
+ I like the ambitiousness of the whole thing, instrumentally it sounds pretty close to a finished pop track.
+ I hear some pretty cool melodies ... but
- The weakest part of this track is definitely the vocals and in the world of pop music vocals are just about everything. With strong vocals this could be quite good (if a bit MOR).

Ghost Pup

+ Considering how minimalist it is, it's pretty enjoyable to listen to.
+ Basic bass, but it has a nice feel/sound to it.
+ Cool variety of percussion sounds.
- Perhaps a bit too loose at times.

John Lampson

+ Rhythm guitar (I like the stabs.)
+ The instrumental section is a welcome change even if it doesn't seem very tied into the rest of it.
+ I like the space that the drums leave the rest of the song to breath during the vocal part.
- Vocal/melody doesn't draw me in.

Micah

+ I really liked the vocal intro.
+ Great vocals.
+ Organ sound is pretty cool.
- I'm not a big fan of the sound of the rest of it (the instrumental), it comes across as quite cheesy which is in such a contrast to the very cool opening.

The Lookouts

+ Nice deep bass drum.
+ Cool guitar. Is that a sample?
+ The overall sound reminds me of '80s rap which I enjoy in a nostalgic sort of way.
- Things get a bit sloppy after 2 minutes. The track goes on past my appreciation for it (too long.)

Flvxxvm

+ The organ bit around 2:15 is pretty nice (although the sound is a bit too fakey.)
+ Lots of energy even if it's a kind of nervous energy I usually find a bit off putting. Still it's impressive to get this kind of energy in a rock track with a drum machine sound.
+ I also like the acoustic guitar break around 2:30. That was unexpected.
- I think the big problem for me with this track is that the instrumentation sounds so midi-tastic which doesn't fit with the kind of punk rock feel of the song itself. It doesn't help that I'm not much of a punk rock fan in general.
Last edited by chocolatechips on Wed Jan 08, 2014 10:33 am, edited 10 times in total.
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Re: The itsy bitsy Spuder went up the PRECIPITATION review s

Post by foobar93 »

Happy new year everybody!

Berkeley Social Scene

Nice tight intro, promises something maybe a little menacing. The switch to something a little vintage is a surprise. Something about the guitar and drums together (starting at around 0:50) are confusing me. Is it possible they are just slightly out of time? I really like the stereo field overall. Vocals are clear throughout even when there's a lot going on. I like the ending, too.

Billy and the Psychotics

The first 0:30 promises wicked. Let's see if it lives up to that intro... I think it does. I especially like the band's drop outs and little fills between phrases. Occasionally I can't quite hear the vocals. It's not that they are too quiet, it's just (I think) that they are masked by some of the guitar distortion. The tick-tock section doesn't work for me, but overall this is a fun track. Is there a second voice in the later parts of the song? I can't quite hear it if so, but I guess it could also be some kind of effect or doubling. It's subtle but distracting, at least for me.

The Chocolate Chips

Maybe it's because of the previous two tracks, but the guitar/drums start out sounding muffled and kind of distant to me. I like the doubled guitar, though. Just enough texture to make the song interesting without too much sound to interfere. I've really got to learn how to do that. Anyway, back to your song. The synthy bridge is kind of confusing. I think it clashes with the really sweet tone and texture you have going the rest of the time. There's something really earnest about the vocal style. Simple and sweet, I like it.

Flvxxvm Florvm

Intro reminds me a tiny bit of the old school sega Crazy Taxi soundtrack. That brings back some good memories. I find the lyrics intriguing and the song is definitely engaging. In order to actually hear what you're saying, though, I find I have to really concentrate. But once I do, I can make the vocals out pretty well. I think that's due to their being in a very defined place in the stereo field. It's like you are standing right in a certain spot slightly off center to the left. Guitar solo I liked, drum and synth solos not so much. Although the 8-bit charm is starting to grow on me. The bit around 2:45 loses me though. But now you have me back with this second guitar solo. Fun! A couple times the "me" in "let it rain on me" goes a little wobbly, too. But those are minor complaints.

Foobar

This is me. I haven't listened to this pretty much since submitting it. I agree totally with the reviews that have called out the flat vocals. That's something I plan to work on a lot in 2014. This one was especially frustrating because after I did the initial rough draft recording I came down with a cold and just could not produce anything that didn't sound like a dying animal to replace these with. I'm still really happy with how the rest of it sounds, though. This may be the first track I've written that has truly distinct sections, and I'm really happy with how each one came out, as well as most of the transitions between them.

Ghost Pup

Color me confused. I don't get it.

glennny

Charming way to start. "Stupid questions get stupid answers" LOL. I love the procession of instruments and styles. Very funny and charming.

Harry Bottoms and the Trio Mysterioso

Continuing the jazzy feel, but this is a lot darker. Too creepy for me.

Hoops

I like recurring motif of that walking bassline. It goes well with the creepy vibe of the whole track. By 1:30 I'm really longing for a break. Oh, nicely timed. The slightly sour guitar part is kind of ruining this for me. Everything is just so dark and off-kilter that I'm not really enjoying myself, even though I think a lot of interesting musical things are going by. When the main part comes back in around 2:20, I feel like I didn't really get any relief. By 3:30 I'm really fatiguing. I wish these sections had more contrast with the main line. I appreciate that everything is pretty well put together, but I honestly don't know what you're trying to say with the song. What emotion do you want to come through? The whole thing leaves me a feeling a little cold.

James Owens

I like the sound of this a lot. Everything blends together great right off the bat. Reminds me a tad of Les Mis or some other broadway show. I hear a lot of little background noises, maybe breath sounds or something else I am not sure. Sentimental and enjoyable.

Jeebas Jones

Sleepy. I like the guitar performance, the chords and interesting chromatic notes, and I'd love to read the lyrics. Will you post them?

John Lampson

Vocals are all over the place, sometimes hard to hear, but I think there are some good ideas lurking in here. I like the guitar part when things pick up towards 1:20. There's something ambitious and big about what you've attempted here, although I don't think it came together in this track I see a lot of potential. Would love to hear more.

The Lookouts with Danny O'

There's so much overwhelming bass in my monitors that I can't find a comfortable volume to listen to. Either the bass is giving me a headache or I can barely hear the vocals. I don't really know how to review a track like this. I imagine nerdcore is hard to pull off and produce, but I have never tried it. This kind of falls flat to me, but I'm not sure if that's fair to all the work that went into it. Either way, I couldn't really get through the whole track.

Micah Sommersmith

Umbrellas. Yes, well said. I like this track. The cool repeating guitar riff is too low, though. I keep adjusting the volume to keep hearing it but then I have to turn it down when some of the other parts come in so loud. I admit to being disappointed when I realized there would be no more verses. Most SF tracks are too long, IMO, but this is a rare one that I think had enough interesting ideas to develop into a satisfying long piece. I hope you do expand it some day.

New Image

Fun 80's-style track. I actually had to listen close to see if it was sampling some famous 80s song or if it was original. I like it, but I really need some help hearing the different parts. Everything feels stacked up in one spot with no width at all. The distortion is completely stepping on the vocals. Nice drop out and back in, great high energy return. But I have no idea what this song is about, and it's getting tiring 1:55 in. I keep getting distracted by trying to work out if the vocals are clipping or if that's just an unfortunate reaction to the distortion playing right on top of it. Or is that an intentional lo-fi effect? I don't know what's going on, but it sounds like you had a lot of fun making this track and that comes through loud and clear.

WreckdoM

It was only when I tried to speak the name WreckdoM out loud in a song lyric that I realized what you're going for. If I'm reading it right, Mission Accomplished. If not, I have no idea what is happening. First time my meters have all gone red while just listening to a song.

Zjaye

Cool mix of electronic and instruments in the intro. Whoa, great vocal sound and performance. The background "precipitation" around 0:45 kind of broke the spell a little for me. But otherwise this is totally entrancing. Great contrast between sections, nice variety of arrangement. I like the two vocal lines towards the end. More, please!
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Re: The itsy bitsy Spuder went up the PRECIPITATION review s

Post by foobar93 »

skypup wrote:First fight!
Welcome!
skypup wrote: Foobar
I didn't really enjoy the bits with singing (sorry dude). However, the instrumental from 1:17 sounded epic. I really enjoyed that. Build up was dramatic and the pay off was worth it. Nicely done.
Thanks. Can't disagree about the singing. This is my first attempt at an extended instrumental and I'm really psyched to hear you liked the payoff!
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Re: The itsy bitsy Spuder went up the PRECIPITATION review s

Post by foobar93 »

hoops wrote:Dang - all these songs are so catchy. This one is no exception and I find I have to repeat myself from previous comments about strong melodies and excellent chord sequences. I love the extended instrumental sections - great feeling and building dynamics and tension, excellent piano. I like the raw lead guitar sound though on occasions the rawness tended towards what I might have initially described as 'bum notes'. After a couple of listens, though, all the notes made sense to me. VOTE.
Thanks! I'm still working on learning how to work with electric guitar tone, so it's all a little trial and error for me now. I wonder if that accounts for some of the strangeness you're hearing.
jlampson wrote:Nice-sounding song but the vocals sounded flat (not in a pitch way, just not very exciting). I’d like to hear more energy from the them. The instrumental portion of the song is very well done and nicely balanced. The vocals at the start of the second section start to sound more energetic and then kind of fade, almost like you were trying to be really quiet. It’s a shame I can’t connect with this song’s vocals because I really like all the other stuff you’ve done in it. I’d suggest working on getting more of “you” into your singing and I think it would make a big difference. (See my review of my own song below for something about this.)
I think I know exactly what you're getting at. Thanks for the very thoughtful comments. It's nice to get insightful feedback on the emotion and energy as well as the technical stuff. Thanks.
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Re: The itsy bitsy Spuder went up the PRECIPITATION review s

Post by tonetripper »

Harry Bottoms - very cool, dug that take on the title.
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Re: The itsy bitsy Spuder went up the PRECIPITATION review s

Post by foobar93 »

chocolatechips wrote: Foobar

+ Nice arrangement. I like all of the details I'm hearing.
+ I like the ambitiousness of the whole thing, instrumentally it sounds pretty close to a finished pop track.
+ I hear some pretty cool melodies ... but
- The weakest part of this track is definitely the vocals and in the world of pop music vocals are just about everything. With strong vocals this could be quite good (if a bit MOR).
Thanks! Agree all around, and very glad you liked the mix and instrumental parts. I had to look up MOR to find out what you meant. I agree the track sounds like it has a bit of the Mathematics of Operations Research about it. I do feel like there are lot of jokes I could make available at this disambiguation page: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/MOR Anyway, appreciate the thoughtful comments.
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Re: The itsy bitsy Spuder went up the PRECIPITATION review s

Post by hoops »

Hoops
Love the heavy scale-like riff. When it ends it makes everything sound really floaty in it's absence. Cool effect. Then the wicked solo. Very wicked. Vocals weren't bad but they didn't manage to sound as awesome as the music. Music was epic and epic vocals would have taken the song to the next level. Reminds me a little of Faith No More's final album. Very cool.
Thank you very much. I too wish the vocals were more awesome but sadly that's about the best I can do!
Hoops
Is that “A Dream Theater Christmas” at the beginning? I mean that as a compliment. My first suggestion is from a mix perspective to get the vocals to blend a little more. They sit a bit too up top, in my opinion. I like the modulation and the overall mood. This is also a good example of a song shift that sounds like it belongs in the same song. Cool solo, nicely blended, with some super-crazy vibrato and guitar harmonies – oh cool! I’d be interested to hear what your influences were because you’ve got some cool, trippy stuff, that flows better than one would think it should. You’ve got my vote.
A common theme emerges in these reviews that the vocals are weaker than the music, which I've long been sadly aware of, but you're right - I could probably improve how they sit in the mix.

Is that "A Dream Theater Christmas" at the beginning?
No, it's Precipitation by Hoops. I was not previously aware of the music of which you speak but I checked it out on YouTube and it sounds interesting.

Influences: a really wide variety - mostly jazz these days - but an awful lot of prog. rock (early Genesis, Henry Cow, King Crimson, Zappa, Gong, Caravan, Yes, etc - and I'd argue that late Beatles kind of fits in there too). On the rockier side - Jane's Addiction, Living Colour, Hendrix may be relevant influences.
Hoops -- Another one with good atmosphere. Nice change-ups and contrasts in the rhythms, while maintaining a consistent feel throughout. The chords are fairly simple, but outstandingly decorated by the busy, thoughtfully designed riffs. I like this one a lot.
Why, thank you! There's a more interesting organ chord sequence under the solo - something like Am Em Fmaj7 E Eb D, which I was pleased to squeeze under a riff that's essentially written in A minor, but it's quite subtle.
Hoops
This dominates my head so much that I couldn't even start thinking about it technically until about a minute and a half into it. By then it was really cooking. You slipped the keys in there so smoothly and effectively that I didn't notice until they were working their magic. Then I was disappointed that they ended and wanted to chastise you but the doubled guitar work took that away and I was pacified for a while. Then the chorus comes back and soothes me again. If this tune was a woman she would be a bitch who sends you home every time with blue balls. But you always go back for more. *
I have not had a song compared to a blue ball bitch before but I appreciate the comparison!
Hoops

+ One of the more ambitious tracks this week (if not the most) ... I feel like I would need to listen to it more times to really get everything you've packed into this one.
+ Musicianship is great, production is tight. No obvious flaws to point out.
+ I really like the spacey "precipitation" bits.
- Vocals aren't bad, but not as good as the rest of it.
All very kind stuff too - thank you!
Hoops
I like recurring motif of that walking bassline. It goes well with the creepy vibe of the whole track. By 1:30 I'm really longing for a break. Oh, nicely timed. The slightly sour guitar part is kind of ruining this for me. Everything is just so dark and off-kilter that I'm not really enjoying myself, even though I think a lot of interesting musical things are going by. When the main part comes back in around 2:20, I feel like I didn't really get any relief. By 3:30 I'm really fatiguing. I wish these sections had more contrast with the main line. I appreciate that everything is pretty well put together, but I honestly don't know what you're trying to say with the song. What emotion do you want to come through? The whole thing leaves me a feeling a little cold.
I was hoping to leave the listener feeling slightly emotionally confused and a little cold. SUCCESS!!
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EvelBist
Ain't Talkin' 'Bout Love
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Re: The itsy bitsy Spuder went up the PRECIPITATION review s

Post by EvelBist »

I've been spaced out with life in general lately ... but many thanks for the reviews of my tune:

New Image
Now this is cool. I'd go to your show and have a lot of fun. Fun lo-fi alt rock. I like it.
- skypup

lo-fi alt rock - YIKES!!!

New Image
Ratty guitar, alright! And a straight-ahead punk vibe.
- jlampson

punk vibe - DOUBLE YIKES!!!

New Image --
... the arrangement and all the parts add up to a great sixties radio sound.
- AJOwens

sixties radio sound - TRIPLE AND QUADRUPLE YIKES!!!

New Image
Fun 80's-style track.
- foobar93

80's - MILLIONS AND MILLIONS OF YIKES!!!

i guess it depends on where one wakes up in the space-time continuum as to what we hear. i prefer sleeping
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AJOwens
Panama
Posts: 946
Joined: Mon Jul 20, 2009 6:50 am
Instruments: bass, guitar, keyboards, drums, flute
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Re: The itsy bitsy Spuder went up the PRECIPITATION review s

Post by AJOwens »

EvelBist wrote:I've been spaced out with life in general lately ... but many thanks for the reviews of my tune:

New Image
Now this is cool. I'd go to your show and have a lot of fun. Fun lo-fi alt rock. I like it.
- skypup

lo-fi alt rock - YIKES!!!

New Image
Ratty guitar, alright! And a straight-ahead punk vibe.
- jlampson

punk vibe - DOUBLE YIKES!!!

New Image --
... the arrangement and all the parts add up to a great sixties radio sound.
- AJOwens

sixties radio sound - TRIPLE AND QUADRUPLE YIKES!!!

New Image
Fun 80's-style track.
- foobar93

80's - MILLIONS AND MILLIONS OF YIKES!!!

i guess it depends on where one wakes up in the space-time continuum as to what we hear. i prefer sleeping
Yeah, but I'm right. Trust me -- I WAS THERE.
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Albatross
KING OF THE FORUMS
KING OF THE FORUMS
Posts: 845
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Re: The itsy bitsy Spuder went up the PRECIPITATION review s

Post by Albatross »

I am unearthing this thread because I have only just now completed an entry for this fight.

My brother-in-law Jerry (with whom I’ve been living since July) expressed some interest in getting involved in Songfight back in December and wrote some lyrics for “Precipitation.” The plan was then for me to handle the music end of things and then have him sing it. Well, I got lazy and didn’t get the music done until after the due date so then the idea was to do a late entry and get feedback even though it couldn’t be voted on. Then Jerry got busy and didn’t get a chance to do vox until well after the review period ended. So we sat on it for a while, then got around to doing his vocals, and to put it mildly, it didn’t work out too well.

So we sat on it for weeks until he decided to get his nephew Jared involved. Jared had some experience recording music and is a pretty adept singer, so we pitched the idea to him. He agreed but it was another few weeks before he recorded and submitted his track to us. Then Jerry got the idea to get Jared’s sister Emily involved to do some harmonies, and eventually we got tracks from everybody. We were both present for the final mixing process and eventually he was happy with the final product. Problem is, I wasn’t - I still didn’t think Jared’s vocals sat well enough. So I reworked it about five or six times after that, because it seemed like every time I fixed something I fubared something else - one time the keyboard was way too loud then the guitars weren’t loud enough and then the snare drum was obscenely loud and then OMG WTF it just never ended. But now I think it’s about as passable as it’s gonna get.

We discussed potential names for our little band thingy, and at some point Jerry suggested the name Shutterbox. Now, as anyone who knows me at all knows, I have a fondness for pseudo-clever cornball band names. But something like Molotov Cocktail Weenies or Riders of Lohan or Income Poop just didn’t seem to fit, and Shutterbox seemed sufficiently abstract and ambiguous for a project like this.

So for whatever it’s worth, here it is. “Precipitation” by Shutterbox.
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AJOwens
Panama
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Location: Dartmouth, Nova Scotia
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Re: The itsy bitsy Spuder went up the PRECIPITATION review s

Post by AJOwens »

Albatross wrote:I am unearthing this thread because I have only just now completed an entry for this fight. . .
It's a nice one too. Good energy in the rhythm, very clean and well-balanced production, appealing vocals. Could build a bit more toward the end. The words were clearly sung and recorded, but did not jump out at me and I have no idea what they were saying (which is normal for me). Coulda been a contender!
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