The Song Fight Excuse List

Discuss upcoming, current, and previous song fights.

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jb
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The Song Fight Excuse List

Postby jb » Fri Jun 13, 2014 4:19 pm

Greetings,

Back in the day, and I mean waaay back in the day, the community came up with a list of excuses that people typically make when they're unable, for some reason, to submit a song to the fight.

I did a bit of searching and came up with only references to the original list. This topic is to resurrect the list. I think it might be fun, eventually, to inscribe the list of excuses on a .org page for posterity. Here's what we've got so far:

I DID NOT ENTER THE FIGHT THIS WEEK BECAUSE...

    Your mom.
    What’s Song Fight?
    I am a pussy.
    I can’t read, so I got the title wrong.
    I am poor, so they cut off my lifeforce/Internet, and I never heard of a library
    I couldn't think of a good bridge
    The dog ate my lyrics/Ha ha I am sad
    I didn't want to "waste it"
    I’m too tired
    Game of Thrones
    I’m afraid I won’t win
    I had to mind my brother’s greyhound for some reason and he sucks at harmonies
    My parents/siblings/roommates never left me alone long enough to record.
    Nobody understands my music anyway.
    I won’t win so why bother
    My record contract forbids it
    People on the message board are mean!
    I couldn't write a decent lyric if my life depended on it.
    My porn machine keeps crashing/won’t crash
    My collaborator flaked on me just after I broke both my arms
    My guitar neck turned into a snake / I took some drugs
    ‘Roneing’ never caught on
    Butt-hurt from reviews last week
    I’m just not feeling it
    Spent too much time feeling it
    Caravan Ray stole my idea and did it better
    I’ve got blistahs on me fingahs
    These people have no taste.
    It was just too much of a good thing
    I had wicked bad cramps
    My porn machine ate my project files
    The Song Fight auto-reply message offended me
    My chorus was amazeballs, I swear
    Boss interrupted my recording session at the meat-packing plant
    Johnny was out sick, signed Dr. BULLSHIT
    Octothorpe won last week so this whole thing is corrupt
    No short term… something
    Procrastination / Fear of inadequacy
    It’s more like Production Fight anyway so F all of you
    No shoes to poop on
    Hurricane / knocked out by boxer / drank too much
    Self-abuse/injury
    The title is terrible.
    Just plain lazy I am
    Every tune I write sounds like “She Works Hard for the Money”

------
Your turn.

JB
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Märk
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Re: The Song Fight Excuse List

Postby Märk » Sat Jun 28, 2014 3:40 pm

-My vagina hurts
-I'm too fat
-Squirrel!
-My wife has burned the scrambled eggs
-The dog just bit my leg
-My teenage daughter ran away
-My fine young son has turned out gay
like a shark riding on an elephant's back, trampling and devouring everything in its path
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Re: The Song Fight Excuse List

Postby Generic » Sun Jun 29, 2014 4:58 pm

Steam Sale.
"Warren Zevon would be proud." -Reve Mosquito

Jon Eric - Get your feel on.
Website powered by Spud's Amazing Website Machine.

Circle of Titles!!!!!!
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jb
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Re: The Song Fight Excuse List

Postby jb » Sun Jun 29, 2014 9:23 pm

Märk wrote:-My wife has burned the scrambled eggs
-The dog just bit my leg
-My teenage daughter ran away
-My fine young son has turned out gay


never read that song as a litany of excuses before, but now it makes SO MUCH SENSE

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chocolatechips
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Re: The Song Fight Excuse List

Postby chocolatechips » Wed Jul 02, 2014 7:51 am

my actual excuse for "The Lurker" - I wasn't near my recording equipment for about 10 days (almost exactly coinciding with the time we had to do "The Lurker.") but I'm back now and ready to get at the next title ! rock n roll.?
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jb
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Re: The Song Fight Excuse List

Postby jb » Wed Jul 02, 2014 9:04 am

chocolatechips wrote:my actual excuse for "The Lurker" - I wasn't near my recording equipment for about 10 days (almost exactly coinciding with the time we had to do "The Lurker.") but I'm back now and ready to get at the next title ! rock n roll.?


DEATH IS THE ONLY EXCUSE!

http://android.appstorm.net/roundups/ut ... ding-apps/
http://www.apple.com/ios/garageband


(This song was recorded on my iphone 4 with no outside processing: http://www.songfight.org/music/hello_my ... e_hmoh.mp3 )

JB
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chocolatechips
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Re: The Song Fight Excuse List

Postby chocolatechips » Wed Jul 02, 2014 9:05 am

it's true. I could have recorded a song with my smartphone and the ukulele I had with me.
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jb
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Re: The Song Fight Excuse List

Postby jb » Wed Jul 02, 2014 9:09 am

chocolatechips wrote:it's true. I could have recorded a song with my smartphone and the ukulele I had with me.


OMG chips.

*tsk*
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Sick and Wrong
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Re: The Song Fight Excuse List

Postby Sick and Wrong » Fri Jul 04, 2014 6:22 pm

The title was not up by Saturday night.
...what?
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fluffy
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Re: The Song Fight Excuse List

Postby fluffy » Sun Aug 10, 2014 1:07 am

my wrists exploded. again.
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Re: The Song Fight Excuse List

Postby Billy's Little Trip » Fri Aug 15, 2014 8:26 pm

fluffy wrote:my wrists exploded. again.
Why haven't you perfected a non typey way of using a keyboard? If you're putting this task on my shoulders, I'm suggesting perfecting the talky voicey thingy. If you insist on the clicky sound of the keyboard, then design it in to your program. IE: Hi, my name is fluffy. And as you say it you hear clicly clacky click click click clack. Also, it helps if you drink lots of drunky water like me. :P ....Glad I could help.

Next caller, you are on the air with BLT in the evening. What can I do you for?
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Re: The Song Fight Excuse List

Postby Rone Rivendale » Sat Aug 16, 2014 7:43 am

I was distracted by the return of Melvin. <3
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Re: The Song Fight Excuse List

Postby signboy » Sat Sep 13, 2014 7:02 am

jb wrote:DEATH IS THE ONLY EXCUSE!


I died. But I WILL be resurrected, with all my evil powers back, as soon as my wife can teach our dog how to sacrifice goats.
Irwin: I'd sell my soul to jesus to program drums like signboy.
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Re: The Song Fight Excuse List

Postby furrypedro » Tue Sep 23, 2014 2:50 pm

- Nobody reviews any more, and that's what it's all about right?
- This shit is so beneath me
- I got tired of people thinking I'm faking my accent
- I heard 1D and thought "what's the point when I can't be that good?"
- My penis is too sore
- I forgot about time zones
- I didn't know when to submit because there aren't 23 months in a year like the due date implies
- I ran myself over in my own car
- Got caught in a sharknado (but then somebody safely chainsawed me out of a shark so I could submit the following week.)
j$
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Re: The Song Fight Excuse List

Postby j$ » Tue Oct 28, 2014 5:07 pm

- this title is clearly one we've already had, with a few letters changed.
Lester Bangs is still dead.
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jb
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Re: The Song Fight Excuse List

Postby jb » Tue Oct 28, 2014 7:41 pm

(even though I didn't submit for the previous one either)
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Re: The Song Fight Excuse List

Postby j$ » Wed Oct 29, 2014 4:04 am

No-one realises when it's me in a collaboration (and that's the *only* reason they don't vote for it)
Lester Bangs is still dead.
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Billy's Little Trip
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Re: The Song Fight Excuse List

Postby Billy's Little Trip » Wed Oct 29, 2014 12:30 pm

because I got high.
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Re: The Song Fight Excuse List

Postby fluffy » Wed Oct 29, 2014 6:09 pm

Billy's Little Trip wrote:because I got high.

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Re: The Song Fight Excuse List

Postby Billy's Little Trip » Wed Oct 29, 2014 7:33 pm

Yeah, I laughed at the new version when I heard it on HuffPost. The added legalized and tax revenue parts are great.

The state made revenue, because I got high
They built a school or two, because I got high
Now the state can fund drug treatment and I know why
Because I got high, because I got high, because I got high

:D
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Re: The Song Fight Excuse List

Postby johndisk0 » Mon Apr 06, 2015 6:52 am

LMAO at the Afroman update.

My excuses are "I lost my beat loops" and "I went on vacation and couldn't take my mixer". That last one isn't as funny as the first one, but it is true.

Others:

Ceiling cat was watching me
Monorail cat was late
I was chasing the little red dot
Clogged litterbox
(No, there's no pattern here. It's your imagination.)

-jd0
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Re: The Song Fight Excuse List

Postby user » Thu May 14, 2015 4:09 pm

My computer died, and with it my hopes and dreams.

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