Dad Joke

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lichenthroat
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Dad Joke

Postby lichenthroat » Wed Dec 28, 2016 9:35 pm

Dad Joke
by Lichen Throat

Mom works four to close,
Blisters on her toes.
Dad lives out in Riverside
In a beat up single wide.
My friends’ dads all tell dumb jokes,
But my dad is just a joke,
And the joke’s on me.

Disassembled cars,
Parts strewn in the yard.
He says he’ll fix them some day,
But I know they’ll rust away.
My friends’ dads all tell dumb jokes,
But my dad is just a joke,
And the joke’s on me.

He’s down at the swap meet, sharpening knives;
His new plan this week is to get some bee hives.

Lost his job again,
Slug a fifth of gin.
Next month he might move away;
That would be my lucky day.
My friends’ dads all tell dumb jokes,
But my dad is just a joke,
And the joke’s on me.

[For the record, my actual father is nothing like the character in this song. I wanted to try to write a song that didn't lean on autobiographical content, for once.]
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MicahSommer
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Re: Dad Joke

Postby MicahSommer » Thu Dec 29, 2016 7:35 am

DAD JOKE
Micah Sommersmith

My kids know, when they come to me
That my advice is always free
In any situation
I just look them in the eye
I say “Life is short, so buy some stilts
In this time frame, there’s no place for gilt”
And in exasperation
They say, “Why, Dad, why?”

And I’m the perfect dad ‘cause I’m a grown man
What I mean, my jokes are bad, they make you groan, man
I’m not as smart as I hope I sound,
No, I’m the biggest dope around
Acting like I’m so profound,
But I’m just blowing smoke
And when I open up my mouth you’re gonna hear another dad joke.

In the car, wherever we go,
I bring the oars, ‘cause I’m on the “rowed”
And we can only snack when I’m driving slow; when I speed up, that’s a fast
And when we drive by a fueling station,
My family knows the situation
They roll down all the windows, ‘cause I’m passing gas

I’m the perfect dad ‘cause I’m a grown man
What I mean, my jokes are bad, they make you groan, man
You say I’m a bad influence
But I know that you’re mad into this
Got a whole band of miscreants
Ruing every word I spoke
‘Cause when I open up my mouth you’re gonna hear another dad joke.

This way of life you can’t unlearn
No stone or phrase goes unturned
I unearth the mirth, no fun spurned
My wires, juices, they hum, churn
See I’ve been infected by the pun germ
Unasked, unwelcome, unearned
So when my boy says, “Dad, you’re some nerd”
I get the SPF, ‘cause that’s a son burn

My first aid humor’s unstoppable
Ointment jokes are always topical
And you just need some Irish aspirin to build a Pill O’Fort
And when my kids go out with all their friends
Well their embarrassment never ends
‘Cause when they say they’ll be home around ten-ish
I say “Tennish? Why, that’sh my favorite shport!”

I’m the perfect dad ‘cause I’m a grown man
What I mean, my jokes are bad, they make you groan, man
When it comes to puns, I make the most
The ones that make your head shake the most
Like the Virginia settlers built acorn boats
So they could row-an-oak
Yes, when I open up my mouth you’re gonna hear another dad joke.
No there’s never any doubt, there’s gonna be another dad joke.
East, west, north, or south, you know I compass up a dad joke.
"you did a skillful job pulling off the sexy" - RangerDenni
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martyr
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Re: Dad Joke

Postby martyr » Sun Jan 08, 2017 1:10 pm

Dad Joke
by Berkeley Social Scene

[Verse - Cmaj7 Fmaj7]
Another year of saying goodbye
After my old man passes away
My eyes will never dry
My ears still ringing
[Transition - Dm/A (garnish to taste with Dsus4, Dsus2, ...)]

[Chorus - Am G Em F | Am G Dm C | G--- ]
Dad your jokes were so bad
I miss all the good times we had
Getting through another day
Laughing all the tears away

[Verse]
Photographs from another time
After the smile on your face faded
Your eyes still shining
Your lies still hiding
[Transition]

[Chorus]
Dad your jokes were so bad
I miss all the good times we had
Getting through another day
Laughing all the tears away

[Bridge - C Em F Fm]
We're not all good, We're not all bad
We do our best, With what we have

We're not all good, We're not all bad
We do our best, With what we have

We're not all good, We're not all bad
We do our best, With what we have

[End on C]

;) :) :?
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