NUR EIN XV - North Beach Vampires

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JonPorobil
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NUR EIN XV - North Beach Vampires

Post by JonPorobil »

North Beach Vampires
by Jon Eric

(I vant to geeve you hugs! Ha ha ha ha ha....)

Well I’m a-shaving off my fur
And I can tuck away my tail
Spend a couple hours at a tanning salon
To make me just a little less pale

I can shower off the smell
I’m filing down my teeth
I’ve got a chiropractor workin’ on the hump in my back
So I can fit into society

I’m a funky Nosferatu with pompadour hair
I’m a Lilliputian loup-garou with Yoo-Hoo to share
I'm a ski lodge sea creature cleaning up mud
I'm a North Beach Vampire protesting blood

You recoiled at my glance
Yeah, you saw me stop and stare
I know you treat me like a horrible beast
But please, let me be your teddy-Drop Bear

The mirror shatters when we smile
Yeah, we’d change it if we could
You think you’re looking at a million monsters,
Really we're just misunderstood

We’re checkerboard cadejos skipping rope with our chain
Bedazzled Krakens on the wing of a plane
We’re hipster Baba Yagas selling vegan organic eye of newt
We’re dapper sasquatches in seersucker suits

We’re short, stubby Slender Men in stovepipe hats
We’re technicolor Chupacabras cuddling cats
We’re docile zombie cows, chewing our cud
We’re North Beach Vampires protesting blood

The mirror shatters when we smile
Yeah, we’d change it if we could
You think you’re looking at a million monsters,
Really we're just misunderstood

You think you're looking at a million monsters,
Really we're just misunderstood

(A-WOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!)
(Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha)
(Braaaaaaaaaaiiiiiiinnnns.......)
(Puttin' on the Ritz!)
Last edited by JonPorobil on Sun Jun 14, 2020 11:05 am, edited 3 times in total.
"Warren Zevon would be proud." -Reve Mosquito

Stages, an album of about dealing with loss, anxiety, and grieving a difficult year, now available on Bandcamp and all streaming platforms! https://jonporobil.bandcamp.com/album/stages
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vowlvom
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Re: NUR EIN XV - North Beach Vampires

Post by vowlvom »

North Beach Vampires by Vom Vorton (shadow)

four wheels are better than two!
we made the badge ourselves
we could have been satan’s pals
or the undertaker’s elves
but we passed the vote by ten to nine
as we sat on the sand by our campfires
from then on we were known
as the north beach vampires

our engines made the whole beach shake
we ruled over the dunes
from cliff to cliff we’d race
in a cloud of toxic fumes
each carefully crafted castle
got crushed beneath our tyres
and word began to spread
of the north beach vampires

north! beach!
we were the vampires
north! beach!
we were the north beach vampires

our reign of terror could not last
we made our final ride
before Dave quit to raise his kids
and Jeff moved to the south side
but as long as the ocean roars
our legend will not expire
north beach will never forget
the vampires
frankie big face
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Re: NUR EIN XV - North Beach Vampires

Post by frankie big face »

North Beach Vampires - Frankie Big Face

Home field advantage
At the homecoming game
Get carried off a hero
Or walk off in shame

Get your shoulder pads on
Get high behind the bleachers
Visitor side
Downwind from all the teachers
Pep band pumping out
The melody to Freebird
But all I really want
All I really want
All I want is to feel alive
All I want is to feel anything tonight

When the North Beach Vampires
Gather ‘round the bonfire
It’s gonna be a night of mistakes
Oh, the North Beach Vampires
Cold suburban white liars
Playing for the lowest of stakes

Ticker tape parade
In a gated community
Fuck the posted curfew
We have inbred immunity

With your lipstick on
And your Johnny Rotten t-shirt
Your daddy’s debit card
Is still your most attractive feature
Manny from the city
He can get us what we need, sure
But all I really want
All I really want
All I want is to feel alive
All I want is to feel anything tonight

When the North Beach Vampires
Gather ‘round the bonfire
It’s gonna be a night of mistakes
Oh, the North Beach Vampires
Latest model Jaguars
Playing for the lowest of stakes

Late morning sunlight
Creeping past my bedside
Every single morning’s the same
Residue of last night
Sticking to my insides
I’m begging you to let me
Please just let me burst into flames

When the North Beach Vampires
Gather ‘round the bonfire
It’s gonna be a night of mistakes
Oh, the North Beach Vampires
Cold suburban white liars
Playing for the lowest of stakes

When the North Beach Vampires
Gather ‘round the bonfire
It’s gonna be a night of mistakes
Oh, the North Beach Vampires
Latest model Jaguars
Playing for the lowest of stakes
The lowest of stakes
The lowest of stakes
The lowest of stakes
The lowest
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seemanski
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Re: NUR EIN XV - North Beach Vampires

Post by seemanski »

Liner Notes
SPOILER_SHOW
Ok, so this is definitely a departure from my normal style. I figured my days are numbered on this, so why not do something new (what have I got to loose). I saw the challenge "include an a cappella section" and decided to make my whole song the section (I only just managed to resist the temptation of visiting my collection of VST plugins or picking up my axe). I've tried to stay as close to the style I picked as I can and actually did some research about it first. I felt I didn't do the synthwave thing quite right and wanted to at least have researched something before attempting said style (not giving it away this time, that way if I get it wrong I can just agree with whatever you say it is :?).

I focused a lot more on the lyrics this time (because I didn't have to worry about arranging synths, guitars and finding some kind of beat). I had a couple of ideas which were either a vampire suicide pack as they walk along the beach, a hate song about how the vampires glisten in the Twilight films (one of the many things I hated about that film) or a social gathering where a vampire group entice, eat there prey and finally get caught. I went for the last option but I also wanted to add something about the madness that happened on the hottest day of the year in Britain where tonnes of people decided it would be a marvellous idea to descend on the beaches, totally ignore social distancing, leave all there trash (along with other things, as the toilets were not open) and then scarper, which I tried to get across in the 2nd verse.

Again big thanks to all the judges, the two points I have tried to tackle are:
  • Research the style and try and keep as close as possible.
  • Eq the vocals. I tried to emphasise the individual vocal harmonies and also add a little sheen to the higher frequencies.
north beach party ...

so bring your mother and bring your father
bring your friends and bring your partner
you have to sign a waiver and there's no hidden fees
but please dot your i's and don't cross your t's

in the dead of night
there's a party in this town
if you fancy a bite
in the dead of the night
we'll party on the beach
until the morning light

and you can't stop us we act like leeches
sucking all the life out of all these beaches
and when we've finished we'll leave the remains
for the locals to recover and to take the blame

in the dead of night
the party in this town
got a little out of hand
in the dead of the night
this party on the beach
made dark red sand

they caught us sleeping in the toilets by the peer
that were closed until further notice last year
they pulled us out to watch the sunrise
and for a brief moment it felt kind of nice

in the dead of night
there's party in this town
that went up in flames
in the dead of the night
and the locals didn't bother
to learn our names

we were the north beach vampires
we were the north beach vampires
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iVeg
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Re: NUR EIN XV - North Beach Vampires

Post by iVeg »

Inflatable Vegetables

North Beach Vampires suck so hard
North Beach Vampires suck so hard
Two red dots their calling card
Tender lives forever scarred
All the girls in the schoolyard screaming
North Beach Vampires suck so hard

Escalades with tinted windows pulled under the trees
Ray-Ban glasses and tight Armani jeans
They never surf, but they look like Laird
North Beach Vampires suck so hard

CH

Making moves at midnight in their mobile lairs
Bite the girls deep and they don’t come up for air
Drain their souls and then discard them
North Beach Vampires suck so hard

CH

Grab your favorite crucifix and holy brew
Loading surfers and sharpened stakes in my Subaru
Cruise the Beach with lights out, have a barbeque
Only ashes left when we’re through

CH
facebook.com/ivegband
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lichenthroat
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Re: NUR EIN XV - North Beach Vampires

Post by lichenthroat »

North Beach Vampires
by Lichen Throat (shadow entry)

They don’t come out when the sun is high;
They’re not lying on the sand by the shore.
But every night, I see them outdoors
With reddened lips and blackened eyes.

North Beach vampires out at night,
Shopping in Coconut Grove.
South Beach vampires taking a bite
Of steak--hold the garlic cloves.
I know they're not after my heart,
But will they ever get my soul?

Don’t say I didn’t warn you;
Don’t say you didn’t know.
Don’t say I didn’t warn you;
Don’t say you didn’t know.

With denim the shade of indigo
And hair that’s either black or dyed to black,
Every strand is pulled so tightly back
That the shapes of their skulls all show.
In groups of three they walk side by side,
In pants designed to squish their hips away.
You’ll never see them in the light of day,
But at night you’d best stay inside.

North Beach vampires out at night,
Shopping in Coconut Grove.
South Beach vampires in lamplight
As they swarm the streets in droves.
North Beach vampires, North Beach vampires, North Beach vampires.
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Re: NUR EIN XV - North Beach Vampires

Post by furrypedro »

Balance Lost (shadow)

Mind spinning like a big wheel
I'll be waiting here until the night draws in
Lambdacism isn't a big deal
But on my breath's a different kind of sin

You gave so much
Want to be loved
Today's a drought
Tomorrow is a flood
You get so tired
Never enough
For North Beach vampires
Sucking out your blood

Gathered at the crime scene
In a crowd of thousands no-one is to blame
Do you know what the mirror is reflecting?
You can't see if you look the other way

You gave so much
Want to be loved
Today's a drought
Tomorrow is a flood
You get so tired
Never enough
For North Beach vampires
Sucking out your blood
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truth
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Re: NUR EIN XV - North Beach Vampires

Post by truth »

North Beach Vampires
by Cavedwellers

Swirling my glass at Nepenthe
Waiting for Henry to show
Got stories to tell from The City
That I think he’d wanna know
Jack is back from his travels
And Allen is howling again
And really, Neal and Jack and Me
Are burning at both ends
Before the rise of of The Stinking Rose
They smoked their cloves and wrote their prose
Before the google goggles set their sights
On Telegraph Hill’s heights
The vampires came to North Beach
To prowl until the dawn
The Beats have found their own niche
Bloodletting and beyond

Francis is writing Godfather
Mario counts up his share
Lawrence’s annoyance
Is the condition of his chair
A few steps away at the bookstore
They hand out political screeds
And truly, old Vesuvio
Oversees the nightly deeds
Before the rise of of The Stinking Rose
They smoked their cloves and wrote their prose
Before the google goggles set their sights
On the land of City Lights
The vampires came to North Beach
To prowl until the dawn
The Beats have found their own niche
Bloodletting and beyond

The establishment stretches out its neck
So what’s a fanged philosopher to do
Charcoal-suited sameness to be wrecked
And very merry pranking ensues
Bells perturb the pigeons
Of Washington Square
Where the artisans and charlatans
Still breathe the salty air
Now the neighboring Jiangshi
Pretend they don’t exist
But the tourists and the purists
Both find bite marks on their wrists

The vampires came to North Beach
To prowl until the dawn
The Beats have found their own niche
Their beat repeating on
The vampires came to North Beach
To prowl until the dawn
The Beats have found their own niche
Bloodletting and beyond
erin.
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Re: NUR EIN XV - North Beach Vampires

Post by erin. »

Moss Palace
North Beach Vampires

Hey boy, don’t you look at me
with those sad eyes
What did you think that I would do?
I know a little better than some
Of those young ones
Who been running after you

Don’t you think I
Don’t you think I
Want you

This town will get lonely
If you let it
I locked myself away
Sometimes you have to get
Whatever you can boy
Cause I sleep all day

I been seeing
I been seeing
Shadows

I been wearing
I been wearing
Black clothes

And now I’m riding on my own tonight
Nobody left alive who loves me
I’m watching time pass over everything
Until there’s nothing left to see

I’m not like one of them
North beach Vampires
Just in it for the night
They strut down Broadway
In their leathers
looking for a bite

Don’t you think I
Don’t you think
I’m waiting

Don’t you think I
Don’t you think
I’m aching

Now I’m riding on my own tonight
Nobody left alive who loves me
I’m watching time pass over everything
Until there’s nothing left to see

I feel the darkness come
Between us
Buzzing in my veins
The urge that drives me
Into the streets
Has always been the same

And here I come now
And here I come now
And here I come now
And here I come now

Now I’m riding on my own tonight
Nobody left alive who loves me
I’m watching time pass over everything
Until there’s nothing left to see
X2
Eeep-opp-orp-opp-opp...that means I love you!
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grumpymike
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Re: NUR EIN XV - North Beach Vampires

Post by grumpymike »

The north beach diet is a conspiracy
To make more vampires out of you and me
The north beach diet is a conspiracy
To make more vampires out of you and me

MIKE
It started just a couple months ago
People heard it in the news and they didn’t know
They're always ready to hop into the latest diet
As long as the only thing they gotta do is buy it
Just another fabrication of the media
That gets copied up into the brain of wikipedia
And now they’re still wearing covid masks
to hide their fangs and obfuscate their attacks

SCOTT
So take a walk along the pier and answer me
Is it normal that there's so many fish in the sea?
Can you tell me why the fishing boats are empty
And we're getting dietary regulations from the CDC?

Some people wanna laugh and they say that it's bogus
the whole thing's made up tryna give us the covis
I don't mind the food, but I didn't expect
to wake up last week with 2 bites to the neck

If anything I think it's time we keep'em in check
Gotta drive up north and command some respect
And let em know, I don't think, avacados are holy
I'd rather take'm to south beach and make'm into gaucmole

So back of and know we
Are gonna prevent this
You can't penetrate
our social distance


Hey yo Ben, once again, hit us with that rap verse!

BEN
I was walking down for groceries
When a man came and he jumped me
He had no mask to hide his sickly fangs
And then my neck it felt the sharp pang
He bit me, yes he killed me
Now I’ma clean up these streets
Use this fad here in North Beach

MIKE
at north beach they're suckin more blood than my pet chupacabra
i can't take him there instead we go to the opera
it's cause of facebook pinterest and twitter
everyone's quoting blood recipes there as if they're scripture
and i'm just sitting wondering when i can go outside
is it safe or are they seeking blood and i gotta hide
they've got an unquenchable thirst for B.S. fad dieting
and i've got a penchant for not socially abieting
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Adam!
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Re: NUR EIN XV - North Beach Vampires

Post by Adam! »

North Beach Vampires
by Max Bombast

*Ding-dong!*

We just saw the moving van and
We thought that we would come
Give you a big introduction (and jam!)
Yes, the jam that Steve made
To welcome you into our town
May we come into your lovely new home?
Oh, we can?
Then there's something that YOU SHOULD KNOW:

Kindly keep your garlic cloves
Stored in airtight containers
Please keep your cross inside your home
And your silverware locked in the basement because

We are the north beach vampires
We'd love if you would come on over for a BITE
We are the north beach vampires
Or we could eat at your place with a formal invite
So why don't let us inside?

We thought we'd stop by again and see how
You're liking your new place
We haven't seen much of you since
The night you invited us over for... "stakes"
It was very insensitive and
We don't mean to say that you discriminate
But here are some things you can do to improve
Before IT'S TOO LATE:

Your eldest daughter's gothic clothes appropriate our culture
The halloween decorations on your lawn...
no, they're not offensive
But they're still up in december!

We are the north beach vampires
And we want to get along
We're never looking for a fight
We are the north beach vampires
Treat us fair or we will have to make it right
And come back over here tonight
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Re: NUR EIN XV - North Beach Vampires

Post by crumpart »

North Beach Vampires, Hot Pink Halo

(Previously known as North Shore Vampires, for the record)

***

Thank you very much Deputy Speaker
I rise to oppose the motion
Moved by the
Leader of the Opposition

Doesn’t apologise for the things that
Come out of his own mouth
Now seeks to use this as a battering ram
Against someone else

I will not be lectured by this man
Not now, not ever
We are entitled to a better standard than this

The Leader of the Opposition
Says that those who hold sexist views
Are not appropriate
For high office

If he doesn’t know what misogyny looks like
In modern Australia
He doesn’t need a motion
He needs a mirror

I will not be lectured by this man
Not now, not ever
We are entitled to a better standard than this

He could change a standard himself if he sought to do so. But we will see none of that from the Leader of the Opposition because on these questions he is incapable of change. Capable of double standards, but incapable of change. His double standards should not rule this Parliament.

I will not be lectured by this man
Not now, not ever
We are entitled to a better standard than this

Good sense, common sense, proper process is what should rule this Parliament. That's what I believe is the path forward for this Parliament, not the kind of double standards and political game-playing imposed by the Leader of the Opposition now looking at his watch because apparently a woman's spoken too long.
Devil’s got me Lindt! Devil’s got me Lindt!
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sailingmagpie
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Re: NUR EIN XV - North Beach Vampires

Post by sailingmagpie »

North Beach Vampires by The Serviettes (shadow)

It used to be the news told you what had happened
And you would decide what you thought about it
Now it only tells you how to think
You've got to decide if it happened or not

Think how far the human race has come
Let's not go back to square one
Instead let's keep on moving on

Those North Beach Vampires are at it again
They're cracking heads and taking names
Sucking the sense out of every discourse
They're dragging us down and holding is back

Think how far humanity has come
Since that starting gun
Let's just keep on moving on
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Re: NUR EIN XV - North Beach Vampires

Post by Cybronica »

North Beach Vampires
By Mandibles

‘Cause we’re the north beach vampires
We spent the whole spring stuck inside
Yeah we’re the north beach vampires
The sun is out; there’s no reason to hide!

For the past few months I’ve felt sallow and wan
All in all awful since this shit began
Now I’m finally gonna go out and get my tan
Stretched out on the beach every day of the week
Soaking up sunshine from my head to my feet
Gotta get tan for the Instagram
Summers here, time for some fun
Gonna get out and bask in the sun

Cause we’re the north beach vampires
We spent the whole spring stuck inside
Yeah we’re the north beach vampires
The sun is out; there’s no reason to hide!

Gonna sit in the sun as much as I can
I might get burned, but who gives a damn?
I am finally gonna go out and get my tan
Now I get to wear my new sarong:
Yellow polka dot I got from Amazon
Gotta get that tan for the Instagram
Summers here, time for some fun
Gonna get out and bask in the sun

Cause we’re the north beach vampires
We spent the whole spring stuck inside
Yeah we’re the north beach vampires
The sun is out; there’s no reason to hide!

When the sun goes down
These delicious dishes stick around
Drinking by the fireside
Unaware that someone there will be my drink tonight

Cause I’m the north beach vampire
I spent the whole day stuck inside
Yeah I’m the north beach vampire
With fair bloody Mary’s on my mind

Yeah we’re the north beach vampires
We spent the whole spring stuck inside
Yeah we’re the north beach vampires
The sun is out; there’s no reason to hide!
“It's like opera for toddlers or something.” -furrypedro
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