There are only nine kinds of songs

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ken
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There are only nine kinds of songs

Post by ken »

There are only 26 letters; there are only 12 notes; and there are only 9 kinds of lyrics.

They fit into the following categories:

1. We broke up.
2. We’re breaking up.
3. We’re about to break up.
4. We’re not going to break up.
5. I wish I could break up with you.
6. We didn’t break up.
7. I wish I had someone to break up with.
8. People are so (adjective).
9. Things are so (adjective).

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Re: There are only nine kinds of songs

Post by roymond »

10. Breakup sex.
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Re: There are only nine kinds of songs

Post by JonPorobil »

11. I wish you weren't dead.
12. I'm kind of glad you're dead.
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Re: There are only nine kinds of songs

Post by josh »

13. Do the [dance move]
14. Drugs are fun
15. Drugs are ruining my life
16. I wish I were dead
17. I'm glad to be alive
18. God rules
19. God sucks
20. There is no God
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Re: There are only nine kinds of songs

Post by JonPorobil »

Oooh, the original author of the article definitely left out one that belongs there:

"Please don't break up with me."
"Warren Zevon would be proud." -Reve Mosquito

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Re: There are only nine kinds of songs

Post by Caravan Ray »

21. Let's go surfing.
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Kevin Mellows
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Re: There are only nine kinds of songs

Post by Kevin Mellows »

22. We are never (ever, ever) getting back together.
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Re: There are only nine kinds of songs

Post by Caravan Ray »

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Re: There are only nine kinds of songs

Post by jb »

http://www.scribd.com/doc/220356/7-Them ... ntry-Music
7_Themes_Of_Country_Music.png
7_Themes_Of_Country_Music.png (355.31 KiB) Viewed 2963 times
blippity blop ya don’t stop heyyyyyyyyy
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Re: There are only nine kinds of songs

Post by Billy's Little Trip »

24. Tomorrow will be better.
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Re: There are only nine kinds of songs

Post by jb »

25. Fucking magnets, how do they work?
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Re: There are only nine kinds of songs

Post by josh »

@caravan: haha. I love it. You're in good company with the oldish his "I Touch Myself". I like the 80's synthy vibe. Sounds kinda like a moog at times. Ever listen to The Rentals?
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Re: There are only nine kinds of songs

Post by fluffy »

About 80% of my songs are either "my job sucks" or "I just quit my job."

The other 20% are either "science is cool" or "I am quoting a fiction trope."
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Re: There are only nine kinds of songs

Post by JonPorobil »

At first I was like, "C'mon, are there that many songs about masturbation?"

Then my girlfriend and I started listing all the masturbation songs we could think of.

Prince - "Darling Nikki" (and probably at least a few other Prince songs...)
Violent Femmes - "Blister in the Sun"
Green Day - "Longview"
Cyndi Lauper - "She Bop"
The Vapors - "Turning Japanese"
Frankie Goes to Hollywood - "Relax"
DiVinyls - "I Touch Myself"
Semisonic - "Get a Grip"
Billy Joel - "Sometimes a Fantasy"
Some people say "Tiny Dancer," but I don't buy it.
Roy Zimmerman - "Firing the Surgeon General"
Future of the Left - "Why Aren't I Going to Hell?"
Wax - "Pictures of You"
Billy Idol - "Dancing with Myself"

That's just off the tops of our heads, and we're both not totally sober, so y'know. I guess point proven.
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Caravan Ray
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Re: There are only nine kinds of songs

Post by Caravan Ray »

Generic wrote:
At first I was like, "C'mon, are there that many songs about masturbation?"

Then my girlfriend and I started listing all the masturbation songs we could think of.

Prince - "Darling Nikki" (and probably at least a few other Prince songs...)
Violent Femmes - "Blister in the Sun"
Green Day - "Longview"
Cyndi Lauper - "She Bop"
The Vapors - "Turning Japanese"
Frankie Goes to Hollywood - "Relax"
DiVinyls - "I Touch Myself"
Semisonic - "Get a Grip"
Billy Joel - "Sometimes a Fantasy"
Some people say "Tiny Dancer," but I don't buy it.
Roy Zimmerman - "Firing the Surgeon General"
Future of the Left - "Why Aren't I Going to Hell?"
Wax - "Pictures of You"
Billy Idol - "Dancing with Myself"

That's just off the tops of our heads, and we're both not totally sober, so y'know. I guess point proven.
Pictures of Lily - The Who
Pictures of Natalie Portman - Caravan Ray
(one of those was actually partially inspired by the other)
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Re: There are only nine kinds of songs

Post by fluffy »

fluffy wrote:About 80% of my songs are either "my job sucks" or "I just quit my job."

The other 20% are either "science is cool" or "I am quoting a fiction trope."
So I decided to go through my Song Fight oeuvre and figure out what my songs are actually about, proportionally (ignoring the stupid outright-trolling shit):

I LOVE YOU: unattainable love (from a dream I had)
Repair My Heart: instrumental
Shipwreck: unattainable love
Stronger Than: how much you suck
120 MPH: a breakup
Listen Close: gender shit
Been To China: travel
A Thousand Swords: how much possessions suck
Birds Of Our Own: a breakup (the same one as 120MPH)
Alright Alright: depression
Acid Mouth: instrumental
Husky Youth: a dream I had
Fool in the Middle: how much I suck, depression
I Think It's Killing Me: insomnia, depression
So Aggravating: how much cellphones and computers suck
Sunny Again: depression
Violet Wants It Her Way: unattainable love; strained allegory for a work of children's literature
House in My Head: depression
Put Cindy Back on the Bus: sociopathy
Brown Boxes: depression, lack-of-job angst, how much I suck
Moscow, Idaho: improvisational comedy
Paper Cuts and Spilling Guts: unattainable love (rejection of someone else's unrequited love), gender shit
Five Minutes: excited to start a new job
Run Faster: hating that job
Gin or Ginseng: really hating that job
God Hates Penguins: improvisational comedy
Attack of the Show: improvisational ... something
Safety In Numbers: anxiety, ants, rejection of love as a necessary concept beyond maintaining close friendships
Rhymes With Lucia: depression
Bad Cat: cats, politics
All Tan: gender shit
Robot Baby: how much cellphones suck
tw3rp: how much Internet trolls suck
Baby, Be Quiet: how much my sister sucks
Night Terrors: science (neurochemistry, dreams)
And Counting: science (number theory)
Everybody Calm Down: unattainable love (for Godzilla); politics
Sorry to Inform You: how much Facebook and the future of human resources suck; science fiction (dystopian)
They Meet: borderline-improvisational borderline-comedy
Sometimes It's Hard to Keep Yourself Moving: hating my job
Double Take: science (climate change); how much climate change deniers suck (thus politics)
Hello My Old Heart: science fiction (comedic)
Hardly a Moment: how much I suck (at songwriting)
You Believed It Yourself: sociopathy; unattainable love
After Hours: how much bladder control sucks
Looking At The Sea: afraid of losing a fragile love
Isle Dauphine: unattainable love
Ruthless Lately: sociopathy
Better Than Before: science fiction (dystopian)
Strictly Speaking: hating my job
No Brakes: quitting my job and starting another one
Come Out: science fiction (dystopian)
Strangers: brain science (senile dementia)
Bitter Monday: love between/of monsters (werewolves)
Made From Corn: science fiction (dystopian); science; food
You're Never Around: cats
Adding Up To Nothing: hating my job
Werner's song: cats
Fiona's song: cats

So here's some clear categories where I've probably miscounted a bunch of them but whatevs.

Love (or lack thereof): 11
How much [noun] sucks: 12
Gender shit: 3
Depression/anxiety: 8
Dreams (or the lack thereof): 3
Sociopathy: 3
Cats: 4
Politics: 2
Job-related stuff: 8
Science: 5
Monsters (horror, aliens, robots, The System, etc.): 8+

Mostly I'm surprised at how many love-related songs I've actually written.

EDIT: I forgot about Gin or Ginseng.
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