Shoelace Soup

[nyjm]

shoelace soup
ford's theater disaster

i am - a silly little man
with a silly little 'stache and a wicker cane
i am - headin' up north
diggin' up the klondike lookin' for a vein

gold rush forty-niners
with nothing left to eat
clouds with silver liners
just frozen flavored meat

you are - a pretty little girl
lost in the blizzard, ringed by wolves
you are - a vixen and a vamp
dreamt by hollywood, beauty and the tramp

gold rush forty-niners
with nothing left to eat
clouds with silver liners
just frozen flavored meat

it is - snowing like a mother
just you and me and a day's worth of fire
it is - months before a rescue
gonna go all Donner while things are getting dire

gold rush forty-niners
with nothing left to eat
clouds with silver liners
just frozen flavored meat

the look in your eyes (i'm hungry)
the feel of your thighs (you're tasty)
the smell in the air (so hungry)
the curls of your hair (so tasty)
make a nice spaghetti twirl
no i won't forget you girl
in this cabin all alone
it's you or me or shoelace soup

[Aardwolves]

I love this! Can't wait to hear the finished product.

[reve]

I've been working outside in the hott hott sun
but the water's all gone cause i drank my last evian
Tehre's puddles around, run off from the storm
but mom said : DONT DRINK DIRTY WATER OR YOU"LL GET WORMS!!!

BUT I CAN"T resist it's moisty allure
i can't stop my lips as they caress the sweet floor
i lap up the liquid that i need and i love
I fall asleep that night, but all that i dream of is

roundworms and hookworms and
whimworms and pinworms and
heartworms and tapeworms and
exworms and whyworms
I dream-vomit parasites up in a nefarous goop
they hit the bowl looking just like shoelace soup
burrowing through my intest-in-kneeenes
detach their suckermouths and then they're free
the worms hoist anchor in my bloody blood stream
and set sail into the ventricle sea

dracunculiasis!
I wake up with an ache and a spot on my leg
in mild respratory distress
i put my pan ts on / i put my shoes on
I go to work and try to get the worms out of my head

but the spots are turning red
the skin caves in -- i see guinea worm heads
they're chewing through my flesh, now
to them my leg's chow
I'm start to feel faint and then i go down

roundworms and hookworms and
whimworms and pinworms and
heartworms and tapeworms and
exworms and whyworms and
writhing in pools of blood that dot my cube
shimmering like puddles of shoelace soup
burrowed through my intest-in-kneeenes
detached their suckermouths and then they were free
worms hoisted anchor in my bloody blood stream
and set sail into the ventricle sea

they gnawed right throu gh my fricking lungs!
they necrotized my kidneys just for fun!*
i misgauged their evil ways
and now my precious organs will dearly pay
had i seen the signs as they had occured
i wouldn't be dying here on a berber carpet
wondering why i didn't listen to my mother about the
worms.

* this is a lie; dracunculiasis will not necrotize your kidneys.

[roymond]

Shoelace Soup - roymond

he was a broken man
that's what she said
he got a beat up car
back in the shed
don't drive no lonely roads
and he doesn't call
he's a broken man

he had a 401
a big house and bed
he sold bad mortgages
it went to his head
so when the whole market fell
he saw the end come
he's a broken man

so what can you feed this man
how low will he stoop
he's eating his leather boots
he's made shoelace soup
cause when when the whole market fell
he saw the end come
he's a broken man

[jast]

Shoelace Soup by Jan Krüger

Two liters of instant onion soup, sweetcorn, salt and spice
A bottle of spicy red pepper sauce and (optionally) rice
Secret ingredient, put it in a pan
Sear it, then add whipping cream and onions from a can
Mix and brew twenty hours
It will get superpowers
The taste will be so grand
Prepare for high demand

Chorus:
Shoelace soup -- aglet-flavored grime
Shoelace soup -- tasty every time
Shoelace soup -- the critics love it so
Shoelace soup -- you'll cotton on, I know

When I discovered this my guest statistics soared
By now I've gotten used to getting every soup award
Everyone is loving it, the only thing I sell
And I don't regret a thing 'cause business is going well
Who's scoffing now, I am
'Cause no one gives a damn
About your fancy stuff
Soup is good enough

(Chorus)

[big crouton]

Livin' on the streets, it's hard to eat right
and I can't count on soup kitchens to feed me every night
So when I'm feelin' hungry I've got a go-to dish
It's easy to make, and fulfills my every wish.

I start with some water and I boil it hot
a fire is my burner and a trash can is my pot
Now if you want to know my recipe, here's the scoop
My shoelace is the only thing that goes in this soup.

(chorus)
Shoelace soup can't get you out of my head
Delectable like clam chowder
but cheaper than bread

Shoelace soup can't get you out of my mind
You know I can't stop thinkin' 'bout you
You're one of a kind

You may be thinkin' to yourself “how nutritious is this meal”
And you might also be askin' “hey, what's the appeal”
Now listen up real close and I'm sure you will find
That the answers I provide you with will ease your mind

There's zero trans fats, and the carb count is zip
And there's 4 essential nutrients in every sip
Sodium, and phosphorus, iron and zinc
It's tasty as hell, so just take a drink

(chorus)
Shoelace soup can't get you out of my head
Savoury as minestrone
but cheaper than bread

Shoelace soup can't get you out of my mind
You know I can't stop thinkin' 'bout you
yeah, you're one of a kind.

Shoelace soup, you treat me right
I eat you all day, and I eat you at night
I know no other food, that treats me like you do
I've truly fallen in love, with your infectious brew
I've tasted nothing more delicious than your savory broth
Why just the thought of your sweet aroma makes my mouth froth
I love the way you look, the way you smell, the way you taste
And every time I eat you, deep down inside, I come alive

Shoelace soup I want you!
Shoelace soup I need you!
Shoelace soup I love you!
Shoelace soup I eat you!

(chorusx2)
Heartier than beef and barley
Tastier than split pea

[The Weakest Suit]

Song Fight Song 058
Shoelace Soup

Feed the kids the shoelace soup, they don’t know any different
Feed the kids the shoelace soup, they don’t know any different
Feed the kids the shoelace soup, they don’t know any different
Feed the kids the shoelace soup, they don’t know anything is wrong

Pick at your necktie salad, and wonder how it came down to this
Pick at your necktie salad, and think about everything you’ll miss
Pick at your necktie salad, waiting for your moment of repose
Pick at your necktie salad, tomorrow the bank comes to foreclose

There goes the timer and the roast purse is done
It’s stuffed with overdue bills and enough thallium for everyone

© 2008 Weakest Suit Songs

[Steve Durand]

Shoelace Soup

By Steve Durand

I go fishing every Saturday
It's a pleasant way to pass the time
And I always end up bringing home
Something on which to dine

I dropped my line down into the pond
And pretty soon I felt a tug
To my surprise I reeled up
A sneaker from the mud

I didn't catch a fish all day
How can I make a meal
I guess I'll just have to use
The old shoe in my creel

Shoelace soup
Filet of sole
A tongue sandwich
On a roll

I'll eat it all
Down to the last
And that will be
Tonight's repast

[ElaineDiMasi]

Shoestring Superman - Elaine DiMasi

I'm a shoestring superman
My cape may smell of hay
'fI had a nickel for the bus fare
I'd show up and save the day

You may know to find me up in the hay-loft
Where I change to a new identity
You may need a rescue from your mild-mannered life
Climb on up into a fantasy with me

I'm a shoestring superman
My cape may smell of hay
'fI find a nickel for the bus fare
I'll show up and save the day

You may know I'm quite a hand with the res-cue
My latest one, it was quite a coop -
I saved a fine lady from a shoestring grifter,
Heaved him by his shoestring belt, throwed him in the shoestring soup.

I got a shoestring guitar
Made of a box that never seen no cigar
I do a mean serenade ... you may buy me a glass of lemonade.
Yes, you may buy me a glass of lemonade.

I have got a lot of books in my hay-loft
I read'em through my old Clark Kents
They show a lot of pictures of the fine, fine ladies
Getting saved by the superhero gents

I'm a shoestring superman
My cape may smell of hay
But my super powers tell me
You're gonna like me this way

I'm a shoestring superman
I caper in the hay
My super power's telling me
You're gonna like it this way

I'll be your shoestring superman. We'll caper in the hay.
Give me a nickel for the bus fare. I'll show up and save the day.
Give me a nickel for the bus fare - let me be your shoestring superman - my super power's telling me.

[Billy's Little Trip]

Shoelace Soup
by Billy's Little Trip

verse-
It looks like everything is gone
They even took your mom's 3 foot bong
I guess there's nothing else to do
So I'll just write this song, well ok

chorus-
We can take a walk and look for cool rocks
I'll pull my pants down and I'll show you my socks
We'll make soup from the laces of shoes
And then we'll screw, around

verse-
Life is best when we are side by each
You draw pictures of my dick when I'm asleep
When I wake up to your smile
You want it doggy style, well ok

chorus-
We can go outside and play some catch
You can lift your skirt and show me your lap
We'll make soup from the laces of shoes
And then we'll screw, around
oh yeah, and then we'll screw, around

bridge-
We may not have too much
But what we've got is each others touch
Your hand in mine, feels so good
Even better when you're choppin' wood


I would never change a thing
The things we have are peachy keen
I love the things you do to me
You do them so exquisitely
You say my tongue is magical
When working so methodical
It's vaginally erotical
An all together miracle

verse-
Yeah, it looks like everything is gone
They even took your mom's electric dong
We only need each others love
As long as I am long, well ok

chorus-
We'll can go and hang out down at the mall
Put your hand in my pocket and play with my chaw
We'll make soup from the laces of shoes
And then we'll screw, around

We can try on clothes to see how they fit
You can lift your shirt and show me your wrists
We'll make soup from the laces of shoes
And then we'll screw, around
Oh ya, and then we'll fuck

[Paco Del Stinko]

Shoelace Soup - Paco del Stinko

Do you taste poop, in your shoelace soup?
Swallow it down then pull it on through
Nibble the end
Then do it again

Ooo-ooo-ooo it's shoelace soup
Times are tough you gotta do just what you doo-doo-doo-do

Drop it in a pot with an onion or two
Bring it to a simmer but not to a stew
You think that's all? NO!
Add a pinch of salt

Ooo-ooo-ooo it's shoelace soup
Times are tough you gotta do just what you doo-doo-doo-do

Whatchoo got? Got a big pot
Whatchoo use? Got an old shoe
Water and heat
Gimme all you got to eat

Intestinal floss keeps the pipes clean
Flavor up the string with some collard greens
A couple of peppercorns
And the soup is born

Ooo-ooo-ooo it's shoelace soup
Times are tough you gotta do just what you doo-doo-doo-do

Do you taste poop, in your shoelace soup?
Swallow it down then pull it on through
Nibble the end
Then do it again

Ooo-ooo-ooo it's shoelace soup
Times are tough you gotta do just what you doo-doo-doo-do

[JonathanMann]

Shoelace Soup by
Jonathan Mann and the Berkeley Social Scene

Dark rain beats upon this train
I'm deaf and kept out of the loop
Your turn at the helm
But don't be overwhelmed for
Tonight we dine on shoelace soup

Joel is doling out the soles
The straps becomes scraps for the dogs
Summer fades to fall
It's gets colder and all
But tonight we dine on shoelace soup

The city looks so pretty from the top
Do you think the rain will ever stop?
Steady as she goes
In 4 layers of clothes
Tonight we dine on shoelace soup

Steady goes the dripping of my nose
The misdirected aim of an unknown troop
I'm driving laid out flat
And there ain't no cure for that
But a mother's love and shoelace soup

[Geoff WreckdoM]

Shoelace Soup
by WreckdoM

What are these vapors that swirl around me?
What are these lights dancing before me?
Where are those teeth that are digging in me?
and What was in that soup that you gave me?

Back and Forth and In and Out
Acid in my eyes and cotton in my mouth
Up and Down and To and Fro
Goin' to a place ain't nobody go

Who is the hand that is reaching for me?
What are these forces pressing against me?
Where are the voices that distort and coerce me?
and What was in that soup that you gave me?

Shoelaces, and Accidents
The wires are frayed and the circuits are bent
Chewing Gum, and Pantyhose
Goin' to a place where nobody knows
Down in a space ain't nobody go