The terrible joke thread

[Caravan Ray]

I've also seen the punchline as "Euripides trousers, Eumenides trousers"

Actually yes - that's what it was on the Young Ones too. My mistake

[fluffy]

What do you get when you cross a bridge with a car?

You get to the other side.

[Märk]

Q: In a Male-To-Female sex change operation, the actual surgical procedure where the penis is removed is call "penectomy". What is the reverse (Female-To-Male) version called?
A: "adadictomy"

Q: What has 2 legs and bleeds?
A: Half a cat.

[Billy's Little Trip]

If you drop an accordion, a set of bagpipes and a viola off a 20-story building, which one lands first?
.
.
...

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.

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Who cares?

[fluffy]

Probably the accordion, due to the lower surface-to-mass ratio. Of course, if it's in a vacuum it'll be the same for all three.

[Billy's Little Trip]

Oh, I get it. Because if they're all in a vacuum, they'd all have to hit at the same time.
....but that would have to be a pretty big vacuum to hold all three.

[fluffy]

In a vacuum there is no wind resistance and so everything accelerates at the same rate.

[Billy's Little Trip]

Well yeah, as long as you don't plug it in and hit the on switch, duh.

[signboy]

I can't believe people are still taking the bait...

[fluffy]

It is not falling for a trick, it is me being purposefully hyper-literal because it is funny to me (cf. the bridge joke).

[rone rivendale]

Q. What has excellent songwriting, exciting guitar riffs, and immaculate drum beats, but never wins a songfight?
A. Rone Rivendale.

[Billy's Little Trip]

And it's not me not knowing that he is setting up the shtick. It's me getting ready to spike the ball at the right moment. A good team always needs a straight guy and a sidekick. And to add to the hilarity, fluffy is the straight guy in this team effort.
....it's a shame it ended. I had some Dyson and Hoover maneuvers ready to go. Not sure exactly what they were going to be, but I can bet that it was going to have something to do with the fact that the Dyson is the only vacuum that doesn't lose suction.

[fluffy]

The Dyson Ball isn't ambitious enough. They need to make a Dyson Sphere. (Preferably in a different star system.)

[Billy's Little Trip]

You have to admit, Dyson is really on the ball.

[jast]

(cf. the bridge joke).

My roommate loved that one.