Paper Cut, Rock Throw (Scissor Kick Reviews)

Discuss upcoming, current, and previous song fights.
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Paper Cut, Rock Throw (Scissor Kick Reviews)

Post by Gemini6Ice »

I just wanted to get to start a worthwhile thread. ^_^
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Post by blue »

i don't have keys to the register.
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Post by Geoff WreckdoM »

I am a kung fu master
"perhaps the most offensive and disturbing image I've ever heard in a song" - Hans Gruber
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Post by Heather. Redmon. »

Hey Johnny! I really like your song this week! Thanks for the links in your lyrics, that was cool! I will listen to the rest of this fight soon, but I had to give a quick shout out to my favorite Londoner! :idea:
jack wrote:heather is the hardest working mom on songfight (in addition to being arguably the rockinist chick....).
Listen to our music!
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Post by j$ »

Thanks, Heather! :)


Blake Walker - nice intro. Like the percussion at .50ish and the pick-me-up is most welcome. The whispering is a bit tame until then but it kinda works better in the second half of the song. Knows when to stop. Yeah, this isn't bad at all.

Blue vs Wreckdom - nearly 4 minutes of this? There's probably a hilarious story behind this, but i don't know it and don't care to. Sorry - for some reason I can't stand it practically from the start. The phrase 'Prog is prog' is going round in my head, whatever that means. *sigh* I kinda wish i did enjoy it, because there's nothing wrong with it per se, but I don't, so tough :)

Dead Rutherford - nice country/surf guitar at the beginning puts me in mind of Urge Overkill or someone. Great drums. Yeah, Tarantino would have this on one of his soundtracks, which I guess fits the title - shame there's not more wordage. And what there is is the loosest part of it. Still CONTENDER if I decide it isn't an instrumental.

Me is me. I was going for 79/80 post-punk funk (gang of four etc). This is the first j$ song with real bass on it. Thanks to Andy for the loan!

Phatyourfriends - Your story (the swimming part) isn't really very interesting to me, although I like the voice reciting it much more than the sample preceding it. Everything else is ... well, it just is, and I can't offer any coherent comment-wise. I hope you had fun making it - i didn't dislike it, and it was well produced, but it has gone from my memory half-way through the next song, which is ...

Raven Pain - Oh nasty vocal recording. I like the backing track. The lyric is not doing anything for me, and I like a good sweary-fest as much as the next man. that crackle is most disconcerting. Not bad (mainly because the backing track has a nice feel to it, even though it is just a loop)

Ryan Hardigan - A bit quiet. Could do with mastering / boosting the volume by 200%. An instrumental with no apparent attachment to the title? hmmm? I liked the music though

Smalltown Mike - I would boost the bass - make it a little crunchier (compress the low-end, I think i mean). I like this - unreconstituted rock 'un'roll! I think you should have killed it at the first snare roll (at 2.15ish) - some good phrases in there. A straight-forward lyric suits the music and the title.

I liked Blake Walker, Smalltown Mike and Dead Rutherford especially. I would definitely vote for Dead Rutherford even I didn't feel cheated by the lack of words. Don't get me wrong - I think (for once) it was an (all but) instrumental that suited the title. i just wanted more.

I'll think on it ...

j$
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Post by Smalltown Mike »

Alright, I’m going to review a fight I’m in because Scissor Kick is being terribly ignored. I feel like we’re playing the small back stage at a festival, while U2 is on the main stage. Damn you, Brand New Car, damn you.

Blake Walker

I was fearing a real typical dance song, but when everything kicked in at :20 you surprised me. I dig this, but I really want to hear the vox. I think still whispered but less-so would make them clearer. What is that, little echoed organ hits? Like it. And I love that I love the beat that kicks in at 1:12. Love it. But the vox that come in at 1:20 ruin the effect I think. Too close to the mic? It’s really hard to hear what you’re saying. I think this has a great base for a good song.

Blue vs. Wreckdom

I’m a fan of Wreckdom, and I dig this more than usual. I like the “conversation” that’s going on as the song warms up. And when the singing kicks in at 1:08, it all comes together. Cheesy horror organ in the back ground works well. I think the drums could have been louder to really make it pound. No shirt no service may be a ridiculous reason to fight, but I’ve certainly witnessed fights started for dumber reasons. Great ending. This is really solid.

Dead Rutherford

I’m a sucker for surf music, and this is a good one. As an instrumental (not completely, but pretty close) this really does suit the title as long as the band is doing scissor kicks while they play it. And in my mind, they are. I would have liked to have heard the “Scissor kick!” battle cry another couple times, but I like it.

Johnny Cashpoint

I like the bassline—it reminds me of Tones on Tail and makes me want to dance. Great tone. A lot of interesting stuff going on here, the background “oh yeas,” the drum break at 1:38.

Phunt your Friends

This didn't work for me at all. I can appreciate spoken word/experimental stuff, but I didn’t find this very listenable.

Raven Pain

I think this is really interesting, but something went wrong. I wanted to hear the lyrics, but the distortion/static made it very hard to listen. They overpowered everything. I like the bassline a lot, but could hardly hear the drums. A clearer mix could make this a good one.

Ryan Hardigan

I like that breakdown at :38. Funky little beat. As far as synth songs go—and I heard a million growing up in the 80s—this is a good one. Love that really simple beat. This could use some vox, but it also stands really well on its own. I really quite like this. However, as an instrumental this doesn’t remotely suit the title Scissor Kick. It should be called “Black Flowers Cry for the Death of my Freedom” or something like that. It also needs a stronger ending.

Smalltown Mike


Is me. I had a synth dance bass going on at one point, but I chickened out. Be brave, Smalltown, be brave.


I think I’ll have to give my vote to Wreckdom for rocking me and making me laugh at the same time.
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Post by nyjm »

all right, enough of pansy jedi wanna-be's and people whining about wheels and on to some really aggressive music; the nirvana and pantera fan in me is happy, especially with the first few entries

blake walker
- cool opening; i like the wandering pan
- owie; too close to the mike; if you're looking for a reall effective creepy vocal style, check out some earlier x-tokyo-river-god
- ah, but like early x-tokyo, doesn't really go anywhere

blue vs. wreckdom
- this ought to be interesting...
- more owie, that guitar explosion about blew out my ear phones; turning down the volume...
- definitely sounds like a remixed wreckdom song, and one of the those remixes that improves on the original
- "i don't have keys to the register" hahahaha!
= great groove, good tight song; i like

dead rutherord
- love those drums and bass; great driving rythm
- yeah, the guitar riff is great, too
- 1:20 and i'm smelling intrumental; please tell me i can vote for an instrumental, because this rocks; thank you
= awesome; the only thing i could ask for is a little bridge or coda for a change of pace, but that's nitpicky.

johnny cashpoint
- great bass groove
- this oozes london: musically and thematically
- "greyhounds high on crack" great line; wow, what an image; "kurt cobain in roma", too; just great lyrics overall

phunt your friends
- interesting sonic experiment and a unique take on the title
- aaaaaaaah! it's the phunt-man again at the end!
- i appreciate what you do, but i would like to something just a little bit more accessible, with some regular beats and perhaps some more dynamism; in other words, more song-like things and less random-sampling things. but just a little bit.

raven pain
- isn't that the name for a video game?
- i like the opening groove
- cussing can be good, but this is gratuitous
- the fuzz on the vocals is annoying

ryan hardigan
- 1:00. huh; long intro.
- 2:00. bored now.
- 3:00. didn't i hear that already?
- 4:00. now i know i heard that already.
- 5:00. i want those five minutes of my life back.
- seriously, this is too repetitive and not in a good phillip glass kind of way.

smalltown mike
- yeah! and the rock returns to this fight.
- great beat, good guitar rhythm and good vocals
- good pause, but that should give way to a rock-out solo, instead of a the chorus again
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Post by MintyHandy »

I feel like we’re playing the small back stage at a festival, while U2 is on the main stage. Damn you, Brand New Car, damn you.
Just remember that when people have big tasks ahead of them, they usually* do the biggest first, and that would be BNC. The other reviews will come, I have no doubt.

*if they're anything like me, which is debatable
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Post by the Jazz »

It would be so great if one of the people in the B vs W no shirt conversation was Carl from aqua teen.
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Post by RBHID »

Blake Walker : If Dr Mario had a lovechild with Marilyn Manson...and the child was ashamed of his desire to be controversial...he'd write this song. A bit repetitive...and vocals could be louder.

Ryan Hardigan : Snare is a bit too dry...way too dry. Does this song go anywhere...nope...

Phunt Your Friends : That water is really cheesy...don't know if it is the right kind of cheesy for the piece thou. Very interesting concept thou...but it needs something more...too short I guess.

Johnny Cashpoint : I hate that "piano"...should have used a different sound...fun lyrics, from what I can tell. Cool bass. A tad repetitive.

Smalltown Mike : Hi-Hat is lame...as well as the guitar tone. Programmed bass doesn't fit in with the vibe of the song. 2 songfights late on the Clearmountain pause.

Blue vs. WreckdoM : Great recording. At first I thought it was gonna be annoying...but now it is awesome/funny. Drums sound awesome.

Raven Pain : Do you have tourette's? or are you in Middleschool? Awful voice distortion...mix with bass.

Stubby Phillips : Drums are way too buried. Guitar sounds decent. Song is long...too long... I can tell you are trying to be funny...which is good.

Dead Rutherford : Lets just say...nothing in the Song Fight rules states that a song needs lyrics =) Plus...It's SURF!!
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Post by j$ »

RBHID wrote:Johnny Cashpoint : I hate that "piano"...
Lucky there isn't any piano on it then.
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Post by RBHID »

j$ wrote:
RBHID wrote:Johnny Cashpoint : I hate that "piano"...
Lucky there isn't any piano on it then.

Pardon my ignorance...What is that midi sound then?
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Post by j$ »

I'm really not sure - one bass, two guitars, all played live ... the drums are a sample of a real kit - the high backing vocal is well high backing vocal??

Anyway it doesn't matter ... just curious as to what you thought was piano

EDIT:Oh hang on, in the chorus there is keyboard. Not MIDI though. Sorry about that. Slipped my mind for some reason.

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Post by RBHID »

j$ wrote:I'm really not sure - one bass, two guitars, all played live ... the drums are a sample of a real kit - the high backing vocal is well high backing vocal??

Anyway it doesn't matter ... just curious as to what you thought was piano

EDIT:Oh hang on, in the chorus there is keyboard. Not MIDI though. Sorry about that. Slipped my mind for some reason.

j$
There we go...yeah...I didn't care for the keyboard tone much, but the song is great...like the vocals. Props from playing the keys live thou...

EDIT: wait...actually...the keyboard sound in the chorus is fine. I think it is the guitar I'm hearing...although it doesn't sound like a guitar to me...I must admit my speakers at work are really crappy...but wow. What kind of processing is on them. Clean guitar?
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Post by Smalltown Mike »

Somehow when I reviewed the songs earlier, I missed this one. Don't know how.

Stubby Phillips

Wow, big departure from your Ellis Island. I love the lyrics; really clever.They made me really want to hear the end of the story. I think the drums could be lounder. The "Excuse me while I kick this guy" line is great; the classic misheard lyric. It would have been nice to have put the riff in there, too; it would go well wth the James Brown "heh!" you do with the Godfather of Soul reference. I really like the "I feel good" part. Here's another bias: I can't stand when songs fade out! Write an ending!
When I saw the length of this tune before hearing it, I immediately thought "too long." But it's just right. Great work.
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Post by tonetripper »

Blakewalker - The whispering over the Casio-core concept kind of passes over me and I feel no correlation with the title. The drum breaks are kinda cool, but other than that the music is kind of monotonous and the concept dull.

Blue vs Wreckdom - That bass kind of rattles my balls and the sonic undertow meshed with the angsty vocals just plain rock in a Gibby meets kitschy kung fu movie kind of way. Possible vote.

Dead Rutherford - The live surf sounds are great and for an instrumental this rules for the title. I can see the scissor kick everytime you hit those chords on the one.

Johnny Cashpoint - Catchy chorus and I feel that the vocal delivery is some of the best pitch I've heard from Master Cashpoint. The sonic tinkering of the guitar is a nice offset to that rockin' bass sound. The chorus alone could get my vote.

Phunt Your Friends - Yippee!!! Playing with sounds is fun....... :P

Ravenpain - The distortion is a bit disturbing as there is some bad digital distortion. Not sure of the content, but whatever turns your crank. Maybe you should hit a punching bag while working through your turret symptoms.

Ryan Hardigan - This is like bad music to accompany an old seventies movie made in China. 4:59 of this?!! :P

Smalltown Mike - Snare is a bit boxy, but other than that the lyrics are bang on for the title. Generally the tone is a bit low-mid heavy and could use a little livening with some top-end Rev. 2.5 K to keep it alive fellow Londonite. Nice to see you fighting. Possible vote.

Stubby Philips - I was expecting it to get all casio core, but then the metal came and I was relieved. Drums sound like they were recorded in the next country. For the title I'm ambivalent and after a while the tongue in cheek idea is so over done that I became bored and skipped the rest of the song.

My vote goes to Smalltown Mike with J$ second, Blue vs. Wreckdom third with Dead Rutherford coming in fourth.
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Post by vrover »

The four entries that stood out to me -

Blue Vs. Wreckdom: The dialogue in this song was brilliant - but the music underneath it, especially the bassline, really helped to push it along and stop it from being a skit. I loved the chorus, just because I could imagine the guy flying into a kungfu sequence and yelling out the names of the moves as he did them - but what's a "washing-machine"?

Johnny Cashpoint: Sometimes I hear a song where one or more of the instruments - guitar, keyboard, vocals, whatever - has a tune so weird that it's catchy. The singing on this one did that for me. Reminded me somehow of Modest Mouse.

Dead Rutherford: I LOVE surf music, and although this was a bit slower than most, it still had that finger-snapping surf music up-and-down rhythm. If you threw in a saxophone or some brass, you could have something close to the Pulp Fiction theme, Misirlou. I wouldn't have minded hearing the "scissor kick!" yelled one or two more times throughout the song as a sort of chorus.

Raven Pain: This entry stood out because it was awful. Really, the lyrics ruined everything- you might have had something approaching a decent emo song if you clarified the singing. I know, sometimes you hate the sound of your own voice, but seriously it ruins the entire song. Bass falls before its might, etc etc.
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Post by EightLeggedOedipus »

Blake Walker
--- Repetitive whispered curses ---
/// Cheesy synth bore ///
+++ Drum change at 1:15. And again at 1:45 +++

Blue vs. WreckdoM
+++ Drums. Fist rhymes with kick +++
--- Kind of boring. ---
+++ That chord change at the last bar of the chorus i sawesome. It reminds me of the end of the "I want to be a sensation" part of Self's <a href="http://www.selfies.com/media/audio/pmg/ ... mp3">cover of the obscure "Call me Back."</a> Seeing as Self is in my top five bands of all time, this is a HUGE complement. +++
/// Geoff WreckdoM works at Wal-mart. ///

Dead Rutherford
+++ Surf rock. Wicked +++
/// A little messy ///
--- Oh how those MIDI drums drag everything down. There's NO modulation on the snare. Use a humanize filter to adjust teh velocities and timing slightly. ---

Johnny Cashpoint
+++ "Disco boys." Aah's on verse. Chorus. Buzzy bass +++
--- Seems a little too "major" for J$. This would sound more at home as a 40SS track. "Unfighted" ? ---

Phunt Your Friends
+++ I must admit there's something much more intriguing about this than most other Phunt tracks, and most other crapollages. +++
--- Crapollage ---
/// I have no idea why I was inspired enough to <a href="http://www.mbeanis.com/PhuntSucks.mp3">remix</a> this. ///

Raven Pain
--- I have signed you up for a bunch of expensive Magazine Subscriptions under the name Clippy McSuckage. Watch your mailbox, fuckin piece of shit ---

Ryan Hardigan
--- Bad Moby takes a turd. I mean a song. Whoops ---

Smalltown Mike
+++ I could almost vote at 15 seconds. Love-it-or-hate-it basic straightforward rock song. +++
--- Drums are better than previous Mike songs, but still have a ways to go. Chopped samples would be soo much more appealing. ---
+++ Clearmountain pause a few fights to late, but also right in time. Nice. +++

Stubby Phillips
/// Sloppy Metal-Over-Midi. (Sloppy MOM). ///
+++ "Sound of Music" lyric. 'Spud' name drop? Sounds like Deshead's voice doing some kind of odd parody. I don't get it but I like it. +++
--- Really bad cut at 3:20. ---
/// Not sure of the Hendrix pun. I grow further confused. ///

Vote-> STD's track . I mean STM's.
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Post by deshead »

SwearFight! Though I didn't hear a single DLR reference, which saddened me a litte.

Blake Walker:
Best Part: The intro. I could listen to that for 2 minutes.
Even with the much-acclaimed drum changes, I still found this track a little too repetitive. I mean, it sounds good, but it doesn't really go anywhere.

Blue v. Wreckdom:
Best Part: "I don't have keys to the register." (Both times.)
I kept waiting for this to clip or break up, but it never actually distorts despite the levels you're pushing. Great job. I think you could get a little more punch by panning the hi-hat out to the right a bit, and fattening up the snare. (A little more reverb, and a boost somewhere around 120Hz.) Still, I enjoyed this enough for 4 listens.

Dead Rutherford:
Best Part: The lead guitar tone is just about perfect.
8LO called midi-drum-hell, but I think they might be real drums, and the drummer's just working so hard on the tom eighth notes that his snare drum's on auto-pilot. If that's the case, the tom should be louder. Good tune, though.

j$:
Best Part: little background Johnny. "yeah, yeah, yeah."
You use the stereo field really well on this track. I love the double-tracked vocals in the chorus. I'll bet you could push even more low frequency (below about 80Hz) out of the kick drum to get more punch. Great even as it is though, and it got my vote.

PhuntYourFriends:
Best Part: ...
There's not a whole lot of "song" here.

Raven Pain:
Best Part: The part where you didn't swear. Ummm.
8LO wrote:Clippy McSuckage
Hahahahahahahaha.

Ryan Hardigan:
Best Part: The fadeout I performed myself at 2:15.
Sorry, dude. Too long, not enough words.

Smalltown Mike:
Best Part: I love the break at 2:09.
Great tune. You did the title justice more than anyone else. Some thoughts on the mix: There might be too much sustain on the bass. You're locked in with the kick and snare OK, but the notes seem to hang just a bit too long, so the bottom end loses its punchiness. You also have lots of headroom left to push the overall level hotter, though that's a personal choice. (Quicky test: I bumped it up 6dB in Winamp, and it still sounded great.)

Stubby Phillips:
Best Part: The haiku made me laugh.
I think this sounds the way you intended. I mean, it's a joke song, right? So the vocals are supposed to be loud and clear? The best feedback I can give is that the bottom end is kinda muddy (except for the Purple Haze extro.) The kick drum sounds whumpy (too much reverb, maybe?), and the bass guitar has a mind of its own in places.
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Post by Geoff WreckdoM »

Blake Walker- Much better vocals at 1:30, before that the whispering becomes irritating. I think you could’ve tightened this up more and come up with something really catchy and amusing, but this is redundant and boring.

Blue vs. WreckdoM- First I was quite surprised by the suggestion to collaborate. Then I felt challenged to do my best. Then frustrated thinking it wasn’t good enough. Then excessively anxious to hear how it turned out. Then Overjoyed. Especially like the uniqueness of live drums, that awesome double hit when I say “Camel Clutch”. I was so concerned about the vocal portions, which I was convinced were lame, that when I got the finished product it was like hearing them for the first time, and I laughed out loud at the reiteration of “I don’t have keys to the register”. Many thanks to Blue for creating a memorable song and experience.

Dead Rutherford- Damn, this is really cool. I love your guitar tone, that rebel reverb crunchiness strikes a real chord with me. Take one look at my CD collection and you’ll see why this appeals to me so much, this has that genuine feel of old school instrumental cool (Link Wray, Centurians, Sentinals). Fucking outstanding guitar playing, thank you very much for a most delightful song. (I suppose you could be criticized for only using the title once at the very beginning but it’s honestly true to form for your chosen genre).

Johnny Cashpoint- I’m having a ball listening to this. Fun and catchy from the start. Try not smiling when those “oh yeahs” slip in or that organ sound on the chorus. Fantastic vocal performance, really hit the mark with lots of cool nuances. The break at 1:24 with that needling guitar work is superbad in a secret agent kinda way. I like this a lot, certainly one of my favorites of yours.

Phunt Your Friends- Finally I’m in a fight with you guys. I’m enjoying this. Cool samples at the start. “The big story” is compelling, and it’s neat how you can’t make out parts of the “swimming” dialogue so you’re never really sure what the hell that guys talking about. Cheesy drumbeat is nice and the vocal additions are funny and odd but I have to say they remind me of WreckdoM. Awesome ending, very entertaining overall.

Raven Pain- Aw c’mon man, you can swear with more finesse than that. I think clipping on purpose can be cool in moderation but this is dull and stupid.

Ryan Hardigan- You had a good idea for a one minute long song, but even then it would have been a little sparse and uneventful. I’m disappointed I listened to the whole thing and there was no big payoff whatsoever.

Smalltown Mike- I dig your vocals, man, you make it sound so easy. Great performance, being cool without even trying. Fits so well with the songs subject matter. I love that bass when the guitar drops out. Awesome lyrics, probably not that compelling on paper but the delivery makes it “Get the chicks, Get the chicks”. It’s very funny and very rockin’ but thankfully chooses not to cram either aspect down your throat.

Stubby Phillips- I think you should have decided whether to go straight-faced dry vocals throughout the entire song, as you do in the beginning, or gone with the more emotional feel you wind up with. I would encourage you to ham it up in the vocals way more and all throughout. Your idea and your approach is solidly entertaining, but I think it would have been more satisfying and funnier if your story had been more concise.

Damn, what a super incredible fight. It’s an honor to fight with you guys. I regret I can’t vote for Johnny Cashpoint, Smalltown Mike or Phunt your Friends, but I have to go with Dead Rutherford.
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Post by j$ »

EightLeggedOedipus wrote: "Unfighted" ? ---.
Um, yeah, 'unfighted'. It seemed a perfect (non) word to end a song about physical vs mental ... brute strength will always conquer over intellectual strength sadly .... plus it's funny the way I say it :)

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Post by blue »

Blake Walker: Suffers the usual problems with internet electronica: it's boring boring boring boring boring boring boring. There's not a lick of musicality in here. Nothing at all about this is compelling. I'd take it to congress and present it as evidence for banning loop-based music.

The Melvins -VS- 1963: The Melvins won, but only just. The lyrics still crack me the fuck up.

Dead Rutheford: It's an aight example piece. I would have enjoyed it more if you had avoided the bluesy solos and stuck with the pure machine-gun Link Wray stuff. Good length.. lovely amp buzz.

J$: I don't really agree that narrative lyric has any more inherent value than pure novelty or nonsense vox. Either can be artfully done. This sounds like you wanted it to ROCK, but you have to take the cue from your man Abom over there - if you're gonna use the compudrums, you have to put the work in. It doesn't have to be as jaw-droppingly insanely ridiculously good as his, but it has to show that you got inside the song with some drumming sensibility. Brad, for instance, does simple drum lines that flow with his songs very effectively. No delay on the bass! It makes it sloppy.

Phunt: One day, I'll be able to talk FM into closing down the open submission policy for songfight. I'm not givin' up.

Ravenpain: DENYER.

Ryan Hardigan: bored bored bored bored. Get that fuckin' tempo up. You have a very short window to interest listeners here - 16 bars of intro @ 90bpm is not the way to do it. This might as well be a sound card MIDI demo - from 1988. .. oh god.. wait.. that was the whole song? I'm billing you for my lost minutes.

Smalltown Mike: Just forget everything you know about recording and songwriting and start over. You have an OK ability to string together funny little scenarios. Now: Why the hell are you playing those chords distorted? Can you not hear that it sounds like mushy wet ass? Why is this whole song buried in reverb? Simplify, improve, complexify. Add some art, be it in the form of irony or presentation.

Stubby Phillips: What this song really needs is some reverb. And crappy guitar distortion.


Everyone in this fight loses his distortion for a week. It is cheating, and it doesn't make up for your failing to tune. I don't care what else you do - tune that fucking guitar. Write guitar parts that move with the song. There was absolutely no excuse for power chords in any song in this fight, except mebbe Wreckdom's.
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