Applesauce Baptism

[Kill Me Sarah]

I was born in the Bible Belt
Eatin' mashed potatoes and patty melts
Until one day, you know, I saw the light
It was shinging down, glory bound
Right next to my 'tater mound
Something to make my pork chops not so dry

• It was some applesauce
  applesauce
  applesauce up on my plate

Well I've had 'em whole
And I've had 'em squeezed
I've eaten the cores
And I've eaten the seeds
But I've never had them with a spoon
You know it was a tasty treat
Sitting there next to my meat
I'll tell you what it was oh so soon (right now in fact)

• It was some applesauce
  applesauce
  applesauce up on my plate

[Treachjuris]

Hangover Black feat. Afro Ray and the Sunshine Girls

I asked my mama
I said,
Mama, why do little boys
Always take your heart, oh, and crush it under they feet?
(they crush it under their feet, now)

And she said, Baby, Look, Im gonna tell ya a little secret, right here, right now
Turn em on to those binaural beats and put 'em under your spell
Turn 'em on to those binaural beats, yeah

Brainwave entrainment
Pavlov's response
Skinner box and smother box and Schumann Resonance
I tell you baby, I ain't never found nothin' like this True Religion

See you walkin down the corridor
Puttin' on your uniform
Eatin' sweet potato pie

Shufflin' down the boulevard
Sittin' on the bayou
Singin' 'bout that shoo-fly pie

So put your head in the applesauce
Feet in the applesauce
Body in the applesauce
Gettin' in the bathtub
Puttin' in the pork chops
Gonna get your True Religion

Gettin' in the bathtub
Puttin' in the pork chops
Applesauce upon ya

Head in the applesauce
Feet in the applesauce
Body in the applesauce

Gettin' in the bathtub
Puttin' in the pork chops
Gonna get your True Religion

[melvin]

APPLESAUCE BAPTISM by Melvin

In the dark of night with your gun
Say your prayers, I’ll say mine
Just carry on - no one cares
It's between you and the stars

Life could be so sweet
Anoint me in applesauce

[Nigel (spOOn) Clements]

Let me take you back to the Garden of Eden
What was it that Satan gave To Eve and

Did it do her any good?
Like the Devil said it would

Now every woman after
She just follows the same course
When she feeds her husband and her son
That Devil's applesauce

Does it do them any good?
Like she thinks it should

It was with the Apple that Satan enticed Eve
To desecrate God's law and thus forced the
Exile of Man from the Garden of Eden.
Now whenever your Mother makes Applesauce,
Just make sure you know what you are accepting...

Its just a baptism in applesauce
Its just an introduction to debauch
Its just a baptism in applesauce
Its just an introduction to debauch

And though history its
Been the same
What was it that made
Helen cause such shame

Its just a baptism in applesauce
Its just an introduction to debauch

But Joan of Arc
She wouldn't make it
And because of that they
Burned her at the stake for it

Like they thought they should
'cause they thought it would be good

[Middlemarch]

APPLESAUCE BAPTISM
Middlemarch

If you bring the apples
I will bring the knives, we’ll use your
Grandma’s big black kettle
If she doesn’t mind

We don’t need a recipe
We’ll just do what feels right

What a mess we’ll make in your kitchen
In our applesauce baptism

There ain’t no mystery
It’s just fruit and sweets
And miles of continuous peels
And, girl, I think I got you beat

Don’t worry, there’s more
Apples in the barrel

What a mess we’ll make in your kitchen
In our applesauce baptism

I know Eve would have a good time
As she ate her way to the downfall of the kingdom
Let’s try to have as much fun
Messing around in your kitchen

You bring the sweetest apples
I will bring the sharpest knives
I know it seems a bit dramatic
But, baby, we ain’t making no apple pie

We got sauce to make
And we’re gonna do it right
What a mess we’ll make in your kitchen
In our applesauce baptism

[Rabid Garfunkel]

Applesauce Baptism
Rabid Garfunkel

Hey Daddy's got the spoon
Feeding time is coming soon
Here he comes with the tray
Now I really want to play

There's the baby on the jar
Gonna make this gunk go far
Open up for the plane
Now it's time for saucy rain

Slap it, spit it, tip the bowl
Now we're really on a roll
On my fingers, in your hair
On the floor and in the air

Sweet sugar sweet sticky treat
It ain't neat
See me mash it with my palm
And you watch it all so calm

Gimme spoon, gimme spoon, spoon spoon
Make it soon
Let me scoop it in my mouth
Even if it all goes south

Slap it, spit it, tip the bowl
Now we're really on a roll
On my fingers, in your hair
On the floor and in the air

Applesauce runs down my chin
Daddy daddy, love your grin
You and me, we share a laugh
Now let's go play in the bath

[bwell]

Applesauce Baptism (The BeWells)

I asked you to take a bite with me
Underneath the apple tree
Told me that's somewhere you'll never go
I lied and said I know
As we left I stopped to pick a few
You'd be running if you knew
I can feel the curiosity is strong
I'll tempt you before too long

Starting with the juice then work in cider
A little at a time pulling off the blinders
Everything mashed 'til the truth is lost
Now you are immersed hooked on the sauce

You wonder why you never tried before
Why not have a little more
Caramel coated or sweetened in a pie
The desire's in your eyes
Couldn't hurt when it's practically the same
Looks like I've won this game
Don't have to ask you to take a bite with me
You know it's good now that you see

Starting with the juice then work in cider
A little at a time pulling off the blinders
Everything mashed 'til the truth is lost
Now you are immersed hooked on the sauce

(repeat chorus)

Down in the orchard I hear you saying
Come and take a bite with me

[j$]

[

I look forward to hearing you sing this.

[Middlemarch]

[

I look forward to hearing you sing this.

Just make sure you 'observe hand/spoon relationship' while you're listening.

[Ross]

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CC

Applesauce Baptism
by Ross Durand

Left CC all alone today in her high chair with her spoon
I guess I figured it was no big deal just had to pop into the other room
I heard a clunk, I heard, a squeal and when I came back I couldn’t believe my eyes
There was a spot of applesauce in the middle of her forehead just like she’d been baptized

As I removed it with a babywipe I guess I realized
Just how fast she would be growing before my very eyes
Cause she will walk and she will talk and when I look back I know I won’t believe
That some elegant young lady was the baby in front of me

Time Flies

I guess as I get older this all could be reversed
And CC might be feeding me instead of me feeding her
And if some applesauce should end up on my head
Won’t be so much like baptism more like last rites instead

Time Flies