The Song Fight Bulletin Board

Jim of Seattle wrote:

Rik wrote:I hope it's not bad form to review songs without having one in the competition.

Quote the contrary. Huzzah! What's bad form is entering a song and then NOT reviewing the fight.

well, it's nice but i wouldn't call it bad form. the fact that you did a song means you contributed something already.

Ya, I think some people actually feel the opposite, that reviewing songs in their own fight is a conflict of interest, or trying to sway the vote.

Chacun son goût, I say.

Jim of Seattle wrote:This is an experiment. I have no idea whether it will work or not. Any feedback, let me know.

I think it's a great idea. There are no issues with the tone of the review, in that I know exactly what you meant by every piece of feedback. As opposed to so many of the written reviews we see that come off as terse or snarky, where the author was just being brief. Oh, and I like how your speaking voice sounds nothing like your singing voice. So good job, and thanks for the review!

Also: it's "Dez-Head".

Jim of Seattle wrote:This is an experiment. I have no idea whether it will work or not. Any feedback, let me know.

Thanks, Jim. I think it's cool idea - although I dont know whether i would do it myself. I kind of like the 'written review' (and despite the 'history' I always enjoyed reading your reviews, even if I didn't agree with them - you still hold the dubious honour of giving me my favourite review of all time 'like washing up liquid poured onto chocolate cake' - perfect!) but this is very cool. Can I have permission to sample this onto a song?


j$

Uh, be my guest, I guess.

Dear Jim Of Seattle

Thanks for your great review of my song, pretty much all of your minor nitpicks, I feel the same way about. I really only had about 2 days to write this (I wrote the main groove on Tuesday and forgot about it till late Thursday night, at which time I wrote lyrics and strutctured the song per se, and recorded everything) Nice idea to give spoken reviews, adds a personal aspect to it, however, bandwidth issues might be a problem for some people (not me, but I'm just saying)

Thanks you for reminding me about the GoM thing, which I completely flaked out on. I not only owe you a review of the song you did, but I owe Phil an apology for not getting his song done.

So, Phil? I am terribly sorry for not doing your song. I still have the tracks I did manage to get done, and will finish them. I toyed w/ the idea of doing a cover of your 'Romantic Cheapskate' as well, as an added bonus/late payment fee/whatever, but don't know if I can sing it well enough. Once again, sorry.

And Jim: 'Street Carp' (Deftones) by Jim of Seattle- I was very surprised when I saw that you got my picks, and that you chose this one (which is the one I was hoping my coveree would pick). I was expecting a laid-back, piano-loungecore rendition of it, and here you go and rock it out! You did a fantastic job, and I listened to it about 6 times in a row, mostly because I couldn't believe you were screaming like that Comes across as demented Devo or something. Great job, I smiled broadly when I listened to it.

since i was thinking of entering this fight but didn't, i'll review it first.

sven - nice to see you around again. this is fun, although i think the verse vocal melody is too consistent from line to line. and then the chorus comes, and it's mostly just one line... i want more variety!

j$ - nice strong beat/bass. actually the beat totally reminds me of something 80's ish. heel... heh. chorus is a bit hard to understand, actually. you might try fixing the vocal timing e.g. "you tell me that we are". bridge section is cool in its quietness.

deshead - this beginning part sounds hard to sing. weird timing. chorus is good. i like it.

nutwalls - i like the guitar. but the vocal needs more character, or something. maybe sing with more edge? this is almost like an 80's weird band vocal but not quite there.

calouse - interesting. i am guessing this is meant to be funny, but it doesn't quite hit its mark. guitar bit is fun though.

caravan - i like how the song about feet has the low end so prominent. fantastic, i like it a lot. different vocal sounds work well. good percs at 1:45. great bass.

sand - vocals are kinda flat... they don't sound really like they fit with the music. it's not keeping my attention. whistle too loud.

baron - head-boppy. i like these vox. the little bit of higher-pitched instrument that comes in close to 1:00 is a nice textural feature. i really enjoyed this.

hell - oddly compelling. you know what would be interesting? if these vocals sounded like they were coming off of an old record, with the thin sound and little pops and such. didn't really like the middle section.

steve - did you play these instruments? nice intro. heh, this is fun. maybe the piano should be a bit more prominent, it sounds thin to me. the last "don't just tell me" when you hold the me it's a little rough.

rabid - cool guitar sound on the intro. think the vox and harmonica are a little too loud in mixing. funny attaching the "untie your shoes" bit to those lyrics.

max - this is one of those songs that sounds like it's an outro for a lot of it. that's not a bad thing. enjoyable.

1: j$, deshead, caravan, baron, steve
2: sven, nutwalls, calouse, hell, rabid, max

my finalists are the baron and the ray. hmmm... listen again...
on a second listen the baron's solo section might be a little long. ray's starts a little slow.
yeah, i'm gonna vote for caravan ray!
-bill

Jim of Seattle wrote:In an attempt to maximize time, I decided to try recording my reviews on my commute. I am speaking into a cell phone, so audio quality is lousy. This is an experiment. I have no idea whether it will work or not. Any feedback, let me know. These recordings are only going to stay posted for a limited time.

I think it was a very successful experiment. I liked listening to the reviews this way.

Unfortunately (for me) your review of my song didn't take. Do you remember what you said?

Steve

HeuristicsInc wrote:
caravan - i like how the song about feet has the low end so prominent.

feet = prominent low end! Why didn't i think of that? Or did I?

thanks for the vote - and thanks for thinking that I might actually put that much thought into the music!

Dan-O from Five-O wrote:

Steve Durand: I have a song I might need some help with on the trumpet, care to assist? Man you do play that thing very well. Do you have a mute? If you’re using one, get a better one. I think if you had a classic muted trumpet sound going on, it would really enhance this song.

Sure, I'd be willing to try a collaboration.

I used a straight mute on this one. I do have a Harmon mute, which is the kind of sound your thinking of, but my horn is pretty old and needs some work and with a Harmon mute you can hear the valves clicking and clacking.

Steve

Caravan Ray wrote: feet = prominent low end! Why didn't i think of that? Or did I?

thanks for the vote - and thanks for thinking that I might actually put that much thought into the music!

Yeah, I couldn't tell if you meant it or it just turned out that way, but either one, it's cool!
You're welcome!
-bill

<b>Baron Von Smith</b>- download - possible vote
Allright Mr. Van Morison, is this another brown eye girl. you miss the "shallalalala"
either way this is another great song by von smith. you defiantly have a great sense of music, not only can you perform and produce good songs(like allot of people around here) , but your songs are very soulful and moving. great job.

<b>Caravan Ray</b>- download
ya man...reggae man.... i like it man.
i wished the lyrics were a bit more understandable, but at least i known its about your little one.
great vibe, its just mixing a climax section.
ok need to read the lyrics to this one, as am finding it intriguing.
if i ever visit Moreton Bay ill make sure i stop by fish cafe .

<b>Deshead</b>
no soup for you today. finding this song very disjointed.
guitar parts are ok, but the bongos & drums are just throwing me off, and there’s really no vocal melody to follow.

<b>Dr. Calouse</b>
this song is stupid, plus everybody knows that feet are above the ground and NOT at the bottom of our legs.

<b>Hello to Ruin</b>
SCWG (stoned chicks with guitars)

<b>Johnny Cashpoint</b>
all right am feeling the intro, and the whole rhythm you got going on here. the electric guitar licks are good and very complete at times. i think the vocals need more angst in them to fully complete the sound of the song. great lyrics tho mate.

<b>Max the Cat</b>- download - possible vote
wow, a love song, using feet for reference. great song writing.
your the man, mr cat. the shaker and the entire percussion section gets irritating at times, and could be brought down a bit in the mix.. beside that great job.

<b>Rabid Garfunkel</b> - download
oooooooohhhhhhh, best intro out off the enter fight.. and then the harmonica comes in. perfect ... nice very groovy.
talk about a fetish for feet. once the song gets going, i wished the high hats and crash cymbals would come down a bit in the mix... and the bass need to come up as well, as the bass line is the entire backbone of the song, but yet you buried it with the drums and vocals. vocals are ok, but i enjoyed the bass line the most.

<b>Sandcastle Surgery</b>
is this jack white ? the vocal melodies are good, but the song lacks rhythm, as the drums are just use a novelty act really. decent song, lyrics are good, shows promise.

<b>Steve Durand</b> - download - possible vote
ohhhh, sounds like a Glen Miller arrangement. so jazzy and groovy.
love how the trumpet and trombone(??) play off each other very well.
ohh man is this nice, the vocals sound alot like jim of Seattle.
the only thing missing, could be a nice clarinet solo, as the song ends rather abrupt

<b>Sven Mullet</b> - download - possible vote
nice intro, nice rolling bass. vocals are too low i can barely understand pass "some guys..." at times. overall good smooth crunchy sound, reminds me of collective soul.

<b>The Nutwalls</b>
sounds like a theme song for a cartoon network show.
like some of the guitar parts, but most of all enjoyed the funny lyrics , good songwriting.
decent competitive song..

my vote is between Baron, Cat and Durand.
Baron , good song but i think someone already beat to this song its called "brown eye girl", OUT
max the cat, great songwriting, but it feels a bit incomplete. OUT
steve Druand, its hard to imagine you had the time to add all those arrangements (trumpet,trombone,piano,bass) in just one week, either way - WINNER

Due to Kamakura's encouragement, I'm writing reviews. I have no musical talent, so if my reviews seem ignorant, uneducated, or simply stupid, they probably are.

I'm using dre's new CF script... Yay, dre! Also, "Feet" seems like a hard title to write for to me, so I'm surprised at the number of entries for it. But I'm not a songwriter, so I guess I write differently. O_o

<b>Baron Von Smith</b>
[keeper]
Parts in the middle got kind of muffled. It actually happens several times. I like the contrast between your two alternating stanza-styles. Your voice seems a little higher in this than your other songs. I wonder what this song would sound like with lower-pitched instrumentals. The breaks gave me a chance to hear what all you're doing with the guitar, but I got bored. Maybe just increase the spacing between stanzas?

<b>Caravan Ray</b>
It's very quiet. I can barely hear what's going on. And I can't make out the lyrics either. Is that a baby giggling/choking/crying? What I can hear is creepy. It feels like I'm in a Jamaican fun house.

<b>Deshead</b>
The opening has captured my interest. Kitschy (sp?). The lyrics don't grab me at all. The chorus sounds better, but the lyrics still seem random and meaningless to me. Towards the end, you enunciate better, and I've decided that I like the line "I'll soon be on my feet again." Maybe my problem with the your singing is not your lyrics but your enunciation?

<b>Dr. Calouse</b>
The opening is good again. Your voice is a little muted. The lyrics are a little amusing, but they're suffering from the same problem as Deshead's: poor enunciation. However, I'd pick Deshead's over your song because of production quality, since most other factors are close to equal.

<b>Hello to Ruin</b>
The guitar is totally drowning you out. What the hell was that interruptiong? It made me laugh though. Your words got clearer afterwards. ++ to the "la la ladeedada."

<b>Johnny Cashpoint</b>
Is that a synth? *happy* The music seems very unique in this fight. The chorus kind of loses my interest, but the instrumental break afterwards is very awesome. There isn't much variety in your emotional tone except when you sound like you're trying to get a long string of text out in one breath and you speed up. I like that though.

<b>Max the Cat</b>
"Four minus two is one"? You really wrote to the rhyme. Your voice and music work very well. If the lyrics had just seemed less... forced, this would have been a keeper.

<b>Rabid Garfunkel</b>
Your opening <i>feels</i> like feet. Despite the fact that I don't like the harmonica, it works. You hit up almost every obvious rhyme of "feet." However, I really dig the lines "I want to/untie your shoes." This also felt too short.

<b>Sandcastle Surgery</b>
[keeper]
First off: awesome band name. The story at first seems like it may have been originally written for "Red Skates." The whistling (or whatever it is) gets kind of annoying by the end. This song progressed from sounding ancient-fuedal-Japan to easy listening to sorta-indie.

<b>Steve Durand</b>
Brassy! Points for being different. You sound a little timid. This has a lounge feel to it, and I think you should play it up as much as possible. Try to sound super-confident and whatnot. For some reason, I'm seeing Ernie (from Sesame Street) singing this. I like tht thought of spanning one's toes with one's fingers too.

<b>Sven Mullet</b>
[keeper]
I'm afraid of pissing you off again, but here we go anyway. Music: ++. I like the lyrics, esp. the laundry-list fashion in which you talk about men's interests. However, your voice is way too drowned out. The double-voice overlap thingie in the second verse is great.

<b>The Nutwalls</b>
[saved, maybe a keeper after a volume offset]

This is too quiet. However, from what I can hear, my knee is swaying, and I'm getting to the beat. I apologize if I'm liking your song out of genre-bias, but we'll see if it stays in my mp3 collection or not.

My vote is kinda between Sven and Baron, but I've missed the opportunity to vote for Baron in a few past fights due to being so busy with school, so he'll get the vote.

Wow, I seem to have ripped off Deep Purple, Madness, and that other guy that did "666" all in one shot . . . hell yes!!! Maybe I'll go for four ripoffs in one song next time! No . . . maybe five!!! Ripping people off is great because it keeps me from having to think of my own stuff . . . Where's the novelty in being original anyways? Besides, "originality" is an illusion . . . whether you realize it or not, it's all recycled.

If I happen to contradict myself, get used to it because the universe is essentially chaotic, and I'm that way too.

Golly, there's a lot of stylistic sharecropping in this fight.

<b>Baron Von Smith</b>
I got, I got brown ol' feet! Okay, this is the Van Morrison entry. Sweet song, nice sentiment and all that, but the "sing into microphone/rich penetrating baritone" line rhyme bugs the living crap out of me. 'Cause in my ears, this ain't baritone. Of course, I could just be arrogantly stupid. It's happened before.

<b>Caravan Ray</b>
Finley Quaye entry! And baby solos! Very cool. Harriet's high squeak sounds like a guitar string squeak sample. Neat.

<b>Deshead</b>
G-L-O-R-I-A! Who did the old one? Van Morrison? Weird. Main Vox sits oddly in the mix in the beginning, then sorta sleazes into the groove later. Nice buzzy slidey stuff.

<b>Dr. Calouse</b>
This sounds familiar, though I can't place it. Ever heard anything by "Jared, Butcher of Song"? Something along those lines. Five more strings to play on, homey. Stupid song? Well, if you say so, okay.

<b>Hello to Ruin</b>
Put on your yarmulke, it's time to celebrate Chaunukah (sic). The spoken break makes me say goodbye to ruin. Hasta mañana, chicas.

<b>Johnny Cashpoint</b>
Sounds like... j$ actually. Distorted guitar (samples?) sound like they're dragging the beat a little, which lessens the impact of the trademark doubled/delayed/j$ vocals. Still, it's the first track that's gottten me grooving. Enjoyed the links in the lyrics, heh.

<b>Max the Cat</b>
Sounds like MtC, yup. Hooray for analog shakers, though the incessant 16ths on them (with the occasional weird shaker stutter, heh) are relentlessly brutal when combined with the steady and busy guitar lines. That's about the only weak thing in this entry. Maybe swapping the places/levels between the v.o. and the whoo yeahs in the mix at the end would be less whatever's honked off half the rest of the reviewers, but hey, it's all cool.

<b>Rabid Garfunkel</b>
Fetishes, heh. Just sort of ran with it. Fun times. And JoS, et al, yeah it's me on the harp. New things this fight: miking the guitar's & bass's amps; playing the Wang Chungian '80s roland drumset; and, uhhh, something else. Oh yeah, taking Blue's general advice on using delay instead of reverb. Thanks.

<b>Sandcastle Surgery</b>
This might actually get my vote. Lyrics are great, the backing music ain't half bad, it's only the main vox that hold it back. There's some weird low level noise in the mix that I can't place, like different "air" around various samples or something. Nice work, tho'.

<b>Steve Durand</b>
Damn, that MIDI piano voice is painful to my ears. Especially knowing there's real air being pushed around in this song. Kept on waiting for some tap dancing samples to start up. Tap dancers scare me. And barbershop quartets.

<b>Sven Mullet</b>
Mister Müllët. I've listened to this fight everywhere, in the car, in good headphones and bad, computer speakers, through the stereo, iPod, and do you want to know the only place I was able to cleanly make out your lyrics?

Leaning against the pole in a strip club (after hours, of course) with the house system turned way up, that's where. Dunno why that is. Cheers to the other overt fetishist in the fight. Sound and fury, yo.

<b>The Nutwalls</b>
Bad Religion! Rawk! From the ennunciation to the harmonies to the progressions. Looking forward to more from y'all, once you get more comfy with the whole mixing process. "In liters it's prohibitive" is a freaking brilliant line.

<b>The verdict:</b>
Sandcastle Surgery, followed closely by j$ and the Caravan clan.

Rabid Garfunkel wrote: <b>Johnny Cashpoint</b>
Distorted guitar (samples?) sound like they're dragging the beat a little.

Nope, all my own work! Could do with some harmonica though

(ps the drum beat is sampled. But it's a real drummer, from a great little Gang of Four song. I was going for Go4 but it came out more Blur!)

j$

Rabid Garfunkel wrote:<b>Sven Mullet</b>
Mister Müllët. I've listened to this fight everywhere, in the car, in good headphones and bad, computer speakers, through the stereo, iPod, and do you want to know the only place I was able to cleanly make out your lyrics?

Leaning against the pole in a strip club (after hours, of course) with the house system turned way up, that's where. Dunno why that is.

I'm guessing it's because a) I'm a terrible vocalist, and b) I subconsciously mixed them too low? Just a guess, like I said, but I think it's probably the problem here. Thanks for the review, BTW, and sorry I couldn't get into your song this week. Just didn't push any buttons with me I guess.

Rabid Garfunkel wrote: <b>The Nutwalls</b>
Bad Religion! Rawk! From the ennunciation to the harmonies to the progressions. Looking forward to more from y'all, once you get more comfy with the whole mixing process. "In liters it's prohibitive" is a freaking brilliant line.

Awesome! Glad you picked up on the Bad Religion vibe. My vocal rhythm and patterns are hugely influenced by them, I've always loved that vocal syncopation in really well done punk (see also: Toy Dolls.)

Our next submission is definitely not in punk-land, it's actually back a few letters in the alphabet into funk-land, but hopefully we'll get some experience under our belt and come back one of these days with another garage-punk rock out.

Nut #2 - Chris

Looks like my prediction came true - congratulations, Deshead - is that four wins in a row? You are fast filling the Josh Woodward Vacuum. Now win six

j$

Heya Johnny! Looks like us two and the Nutwalls tied w/ 7 votes each. We should do a Johnny/Nutwalls/Sven collaboration next fight. You never know.

Sounds like a sweet idea to me Though, even combined we'd only have drawn ...

j$

Ah, but the awesomeness would increase exponentially, not.. er, additive..ly? (what's that damned word I'm trying to think of?)

Svën Müllët wrote:Ah, but the awesomeness would increase exponentially, not.. er, additive..ly? (what's that damned word I'm trying to think of?)

That 1*2*3*4*5*6*7*1*2*3 one? Oh, and re: your reply, it wasn't so much that your vox were mixed low, I think, as there was so much going on in there fighting for the same auditory space/frequencies/some-vague-technical-term-that-makes-me-sound-like-I-have-a-clue.

But on the club's system, man, your song had the space for all that stuff to get out nice and clear. It was a weird experience, realizing your mix was just waiting for a system to do it justice.