Nur Ein XX Round Zero "Get Cooking"

[Adam!]

Fun fight; lots of silly, lots of inspiration, lots of meta. My top 3 (in no order):

Grumpy Mike: What a chorus. This rules. If you can't rap in round zero then when can you?

LW&RG: This grooves for days. I'm a sucker for bass and hooks and this has plenty of both.

Sober: Speaking of bass, holy hell. Love the clean mix and the Vulf vibes, plus a bunch of the lines made me laugh aloud. Incredible.

[letitsnow]

Some thoughts from us

Berkeley social scene - nice solo, hell yeah guitar harmonies

Brown word and big whine - spoken vocal works well and guitar has a nice dark sludgy feel to it without the mix being muddy

Carlo jr - charming and odd, jazzy acoustic guitar sounds great

Cavedwellers - more guitar harmonies, nice. Drums are very busy. Cool organ solo. Some catchy melodies but I wish there was a bit more space in the mix to enjoy them

Cybronica - nice guitar / bass / string work. The retro reverby vocal sound is effective although in the wordy middle section it sounds like you're struggling to keep up

Dutch widows - very short! But a fun intro to the widows project

Eric - bit of a velvet underground vibe maybe, simple guitar + bass mix sounds good

Friends - funny about the title / challenge lol. Song has a nice psychedelic vibe though, excellent fuzzy guitar

Glenny - nice bright guitar bounce. Fun how it speeds up

Grumpy mike - like the cymbal-heavy metallic drum sound, generally nice production

Jellyfish - some interesting sound choices, that chiming percussion is cool. Drums have a nice groove to them, and the layered vocals work well

Ken - 50s rock and roll vibes, nice bassline. Feel like I'm missing the joke on the lyrics a little but it's a fun listen

Le Tits Now - hi we're new

Lean mean groove machine - impressive bass playing! The different vocalists (or just vocal styles?) are fun.

Lucky witch righteous ghost - cool live sound

Max - lots of energy!

Micah - accordion!

Sober - bluesy and tasteful

Wreckdom - very strange! The jaunty keyboard is great

[Sober]

Sober: Speaking of bass, holy hell. Love the clean mix and the Vulf vibes, plus a bunch of the lines made me laugh aloud. Incredible.

You better believe I had the Madison Square Garden tracks up for tone/arrangement/mix inspiration. Wish I'd started my song earlier (and that I was a better bass player )

[furrypedro]

...Mauering is considered to be in very poor taste and in some cases players who do it often enough can be asked to leave a game.

Given that "Nur Ein" is also German, it seems like a fitting and concise way of describing a round in which the player has immunity and does not submit a song.

I recall Sam got annoyed when I added the statistic under that name... because he's the biggest mauerer of them all.

I assumed the point of counting that separately from Immunities was to lightly shame folks who actually used their immunity to skip writing songs, since nominally the whole tournament is about writing songs.

Apparently the shaming is not so light!
Seems like a concept in Nur Ein that doesn't really need a term coined for it, or to be included in the table. There is something quite odd about offering immunity and then creating a (potentially pejorative) label for artists who actually use their immunity.

Thank you for the explanation though, Mike. Clears that up.

[ujnhunter]

Apparently the shaming is not so light!
Seems like a concept in Nur Ein that doesn't really need a term coined for it, or to be included in the table. There is something quite odd about offering immunity and then creating a (potentially pejorative) label for artists who actually use their immunity.

Thank you for the explanation though, Mike. Clears that up.

Why in your mind does "not submitting a song" = "use immunity"? You could "use your immunity" by making a "crappy song", or making a song that doesn't "follow the rules" or if you're usually trying to be a "judge pleaser" (impossible, since no 2 judges are alike) you can create a song that you like that is typically "judge biased" to be "bad", and the immunity just means they can't vote you off the island. I don't think "immunity" was created with the intention of giving the best song creator a "week off"... why would people want "less" songs from the "best" songwriters? It's probably "shameful" to nudge them into creating a new song regardless of "immunity", eh?

Edit: But some people have no "shame" it seems...

[furrypedro]

a bunch of inverted commas

Not submitting a song is 100% using immunity. Although I agree with you that using immunity doesn't necessarily mean not submitting a song. But the other scenarios you mentioned, though worthy of discussion, do not have a column on the table which is why I didn't mention them.

I honestly have no idea why immunity was created, not that I'm saying I'm against it, and I have always written a song anyway on the very rare occasions I have had it. But if it wasn't created with the intention of giving the round winner a week off then I am curious of what its purpose is. You make a good point that judges would want more songs from the stronger artists.

[Niveous]

I honestly have no idea why immunity was created, not that I'm saying I'm against it, and I have always written a song anyway on the very rare occasions I have had it. But if it wasn't created with the intention of giving the round winner a week off then I am curious of what its purpose is.

That is the reason for immunity.
Please note, I learned about this mauer thing same time you did.

[ujnhunter]

Just want to say that I have no issue with people using "immunity" any way they choose... and I'm not even a Judge so, my opinion doesn't really matter one way or the other, I was just trying to explain other ways people could take "immunity" and that it doesn't necessarily by Default have to = "week off" but could also just be a "safe guard" against a week with a "weak" song, eh? I personally want to hear the best song writers writing songs every week, even if they're "bad" and if they're skipping rounds, we all miss out on what could have been... but I also have no issue with the slight ribbing that the "winners" are getting for taking "advantage" of the situation...

[grumpymike]

Immunity means exactly that: you are immune from judgement and being cut.

Since, traditionally, there are people who submit songs during immunity, there will inevitably be a comparison to those who do not, whether you like it or not. I've done both and have no shame. The stat is there to save the curious from doing the math by hand - because the numbers don't lie. The obscure name is there for funsies and brevity.

I'd also like to note that:
* By the time you find out you're immune, you might already have a song started.
* You can ignore the title, challenge, and quality. It's not like submitting an immune song is extreme hardship.
* Some of the best songs have been immune entries.

[erin.]

In the words of the great Tom Waits; "Come down off the cross, we can use the wood". ( Come on up to the house).
I look at winning immunity as the only prize we win in this contest, and there are only a few chances to win them. It's a gift that I am not too keen on passing up!
I have entered probably over 100 songs over the past 18 years of participating in Nur Ein, and used my immunity 8 times.
I feel ZERO SHAME in taking those immunity opportunities.

[glennny]

Here's what I think is weird about Nur Ein.

Immunity: why are you immune from winning? Other survive style contests like Top Chef, Project Runway, etc. winners can win immunity, but they are just immune from elimination, they can still win twice in a row. If i were to make one tweak with Nur Ein it would be to change that little thing about immunity.

[Lunkhead]

Some comments overall: Please, please think twice about rapping. 9 times out of 10 times it's a mistake. (Mike's win is the exception not the norm. ) I personally am not weighing the challenge very heavily in my rankings, but I thought a fair amount of the challenge fulfillment felt pretty uninspired, particularly folks whose reference was just using their own name, or shoe horning in one or a few names.

Berkeley Social Scene
As a former Berkeley resident and regular Berkeley Bowl shopper, I appreciate the subject matter, although I don't know how much it will resonate for folks who haven't shopped at the Bowl. I'm a little confused by the fake-out 50's rock sounding intro since the song never goes back to that. If I had been there I would have said the pre-chorus should have just been one time through, not two. Also this probably could have ended with the end of the solo. All that being said it's mostly enjoyable, I appreciate the fast pace and the vocal melodies are sometimes nicely creative.

Brown Word
I enjoy the "low music" vibe (bass, baritone sax, etc.) and spoken word vocals and some of the lyrics. The sax samples or whatever they are seem to hit some notes that aren't in the key in the pre-chorus, as does the lead guitar in the second pre-chorus. I don't like the rap in the chorus nearly as much as the verse vocals. Overall I think this needed to have more variety in dynamics and arrangement, it quickly started to feel a little samey. There is a change up at the end but it feels like that could have been earlier and more integrated into the song.

Carlo B Jr
More lounge vibes, huh. It's a nice vibe. I like the way you repeat the "inspire me" to end the chorus and that there is sort of a little break there before the band resumes. Very nice guitar solo. I think after the solo I could have used some more differentiation from the earlier repeat of those parts, like change the instrumentation or something.

Cavedwellers
More pandering to the former Berkeley resident judges. In spite of that, that the song is pretty much a mashup of a list of Berkeley references and a list of Miles Davis album titles ultimately didn't do a lot for me. I also didn't like the spoken/semi-rapped stuff. The chorus is the best part by far. The intro feels a little messy. I really could have used some variation in the energy level earlier than the part after the second chorus. The organ solo was a pleasant surprise as an alternative to a guitar solo. Oh wait, there's the guitarmony soloing/melody again for the outro, which like the intro feels a little sloppy.

Cybronica
The music bed sounds like a drum beat and a guitar loop that go together and are funky, mashed with a bunch of other loops with different vibes, and to me it just feels like cacophony rather than a balanced recipe. I do like the strings line in the chorus, that adds a nice tension and variation to the song. I wish the main vocal melody in the chorus had been a little more different from the verse though. For me, funk/rap are not great pairings for your voice. This one just didn't land for me, sorry.

The Dutch Widows
Good music. I appreciate this one is brief. You probably could have even stretched the outro out a bit longer.

Eric Novak
This recording so super desperately needs drums or any kind of percussion at all, even just hand claps, snaps, anything. And/or the vocals needed to be a lot more energetic, vs the laid back vibe they have. Backup vocals could help a lot too or a melodic instrument. There's definitely potential here though, what's there is solid. I am probably missing something but I don't think there's any challenge fulfillment in this one?

The Friends
I like the groove and I like the weirdness in the instrumentation. As half of Moss Palace, I'm going to assume "Moss Landing" is a reference to us? I like the break after the first chorus and the way the drums bring the band back in. Unfortunately the slow pace is making it start to drag a bit during the second verse, but fortunately you bring in those ahh ahh vocals and the lead guitar and kick things up a notch at the right time. I'm digging the outro. In hindsight I probably should have ranked this a place or two higher than I did. Parting comment, please work on the pitch of your vocals. IMO there is no shame in using autotune to get vocals that are in the ballpark to actually be on pitch, considering how little time is available to record these songs.

glennny
I didn't enjoy the ever-increasing-tempo gimmick, it seems unnecessary. Something about the drums in the second half of the guitar solo sounds a little disjointed with the drums. Unfortunately the lyrics didn't really grab me with this one and I didn't find a ton else to grab onto.

Grumpy Mike
As I mentioned, rap is generally a bad choice, and also I don't usually prefer humor songs, but for some reason this one really landed for me. The lyrics were just ridiculous enough, cleverly dumb, with goofy braggadocio, w/o being outright terrible. You kinda sound like Weird Al in the verses, which I mean as a complement. Hooky chorus, very nice, glad to hear you switch up to singing. I think you repeated the chorus too many times before the bridge. The punchline of the bridge is so silly, though, it cracks me up. But yeah, this is way too long for this idea, you could trim some fat out of the chorus repeats before and after the bridge, and the outro didn't really need to happen, especially when it's a fade out.

Jellyfish name-too-long
I didn't pay close enough attention to know for sure, but, you're just referring to yourself by all the different names you've used, right? This song is pretty weird, I feel like I don't get it, musically or lyrically. It's OK I guess.

Ken Mahru
It's hard for me to hear these drums when I know what it could have sounded like if you'd actually played drums vs sequencing them. Also please say "world" normally. But this has a fun vibe anyway. Nice guitar solo. I appreciate the backup vocals. I feel very juvenile but the ending makes me laugh every time, but the first time when I didn't know it was going to happen I laughed the hardest.

Le Tits Now
Not a fan of the band name. Fortunately I like the music and singing more. The synth in the second verse could use some reverb on it. Things get weirdly dry there w/o the guitar. Very hooky chorus, definitely the best part of the song. I especially enjoy the instrumentation and arrangement overall in this one. This is really nitpicky but "intentions never followed through upon"? Do you need the "upon" there?

Lean Mean Groove Machine
I like the drums and bass. I do not like the weird cookie monster voice. Slap that bass though, dang. Disco-licious. This reminds me a little bit of Mr. Bungle, like when the bridge kicks in. Anyway, maybe next time try a Beegees type falsetto instead of cookie monster.

LWRG
I feel like I'm there in the room with you. This almost sounds like LWRG channeling WreckdoM. Anyway, this sounds like just an OK jam. I feel like I got the idea by the 3 minute mark, and it did not need to go on 2 more minutes. Save the stretched out jam for live.

Max
More rap... some of it actually does work for me in this one though. I'm running out of steam here for things to say. This is competently put together and performed and recorded, which is no surprise. Looking for something to say, I think it could have been cool to have some kind of actual transition from the chorus into the verse rather than it being an abrupt change. And maybe the chorus could have used a different bass instrument, the slidey/farty one from the verse I don't think fits as well in the choruses. Weird abrupt ending but I enjoyed the reference.

Micah
It's nice to have a whole different genre/feel happening here, good contrast to everybody else. This is a pretty solid by-the-numbers genre exercise with the highlight being the accordion of course.

Sober
So smooooth. While the bass playing is indeed quite tasty, the overall band sound veers into cheesy territory for me. Also, "mistookin'", oof. That was a miss for me. Overall the lyrics and vocals are putting me off. I enjoy the instrumental bit with the bass/organ/guitar playing in unison.

WreckdoM
Please post your lyrics in future rounds. This is pretty much what I expect from an average WreckdoM song.

[eargoggle]

OH MY GOD, not only did I totally bungle the prompt and get the song title wrong, I also changed your band name from Moss Palace to Moss Landing?!?!?!?! What the fuck was I smoking last week. Well, we got a song out of it, is all I can say. thanks for the words and thanks for listening....I am still making my way through all the songs this week. Feel good about our song for this round too, sending it in tonight. Yee-haw.

[Siebass]

Just getting caught up now.

Thanks for the reviews Lunkhead and letits.

I am aiming for groove/dance this Nur Ein, so glad I hit that on round zero.

I was also aiming for gravelly, and not muppet-y (I have a different voice for that) on the vocal, so it seems I need to work on that if it landed that way for you.

Based on your notes about rap and comedy, you are going to hate my Round 1 song, Lunkhead, so I will pray for the grace of the other 4 judges, lol.

Nur Ein, onward and upwards!

[Cybronica]

Thanks to the judges, and to Lunkhead and letitsnow for taking the time to write reviews!

Cybronica
The music bed sounds like a drum beat and a guitar loop that go together and are funky, mashed with a bunch of other loops with different vibes, and to me it just feels like cacophony rather than a balanced recipe. I do like the strings line in the chorus, that adds a nice tension and variation to the song. I wish the main vocal melody in the chorus had been a little more different from the verse though. For me, funk/rap are not great pairings for your voice. This one just didn't land for me, sorry.

Correct! The song was entirely loops except for the vocals. This was due to the fact that I was traveling last week and didn’t have access to my usual music set up. So, i tried something I haven’t done before- I’ve never really used the Apple Loops library except when trying to find particular sound effects. I don’t know if it was terribly cohesive, but it sounds way better than it should for being cranked out in less than 36 hours. Mainly, I had fun working on it in person with a friend who lives in a different time zone than me, so I count that as a win!

Duly noted about the style of music! I agree that these styles were outside of my wheelhouse, but if you can’t take chances in round 0, when can you? I didn’t think of the bridge as rapping, mainly because it has a sung melody, so I thought it more of a patter song moment. I was trying to use some rhythm and declamation I learned about from a creator who specializes in analyzing the metrical intricacies of rap, though, so the comparison is not unwarranted. I want to get better at that type of poetic style cause I think it’s really cool and expressive, but i acknowledge that it is not a style I am super familiar with, and I want to give it its due respect.


Thanks again for the feedback!

[Pigfarmer Jr]

Not that many reviews so here are some notes I jotted down earlier in the week. Can't make out all the writing so I'm hoping I'm transcribing it properly.

Grumpy Mike - Great vocal. It cuts through. Good arrangement. Didn't feel like a 4:00 song. Did you only use half a former name in the lyric or did I miss something?

Max Bombast - Excellent use of the challenge (or conforming to the challenge or whatever.) This is something fun that keeps me smiling. Can't help but want to sing along. Love the getcookinggetcooking hook.

Cavedwellers - Organ is very good. Drums maybe a little too much in a few places. But you got me moving, especially on the chorus. Catchy chorus. The bass riff and organ build/break is great into the organ solo.

Berkeley Social Scene - The slide is a very good choice (and well implemented.) Twin guitars are good. Drums sound good/clear.

Ken Mahru - I like the mix. The reverb on the vox worked great for me. The almost tongue-in-cheek vocal take works well for me. Challenge was well implemented.

Le Tits Now - Vocal Harmony is great. I like the obvious mention/prompt. Love the angle of the lyric. Slightly disappointed in the number of mentions. I like the outro guitar.

Carlo Bruno Jr. - The melody is alright. The pads are cool. Lead acoustic good. I feel it needs a dynamic contrast. I like the Lucky Spoon lyric.

Glennny - I like the drums. I like that the title is appropriate but isn't highlighted in the lyric. I like the rhythm guitars. Speed up thing is maybe a bit too much but I like the synergy with the get cooking challenge. That chorus... yup.

Sober - Loving the keys. "Mistooken" just looks so damn wrong but it works so damn well (for me) in the song. Love the instrumental break. Vox maybe not sitting perfectly in the mix but it's catchy.

Jellyfish d'Amour (and the Banjotron 5000) - Decent arrangement, well produced but it's not completely grabbing me. Lots of mentions is cool.

Micah Sommersmith - A fun one. Maybe not too adventurous. Vox is good, I love the growl. Loving the according here (but it's not always my favorite instrument.)

Brown Word and the Big Whine - Groove is cool. Vox is mixed well, not too up but clean. Is that a drowning noise?

Lucky Witch & the Righteous Ghost - I like the bass, the vox performance is strong. I think you have a really good 2:42 song but feels a bit repetitive. 5:27 in a round with 19 entries seems like a bold statement.

The Dutch Widows - I like the shimmer. It almost feels like the song should be sped up a little bit (a la the Wonders.) I got the feeling it was a "get to the next round" song rather than one of your stronger efforts.

Lean Mean Groove Machine - I feel there's an almost creepy edge/feeling to this. Loving the bass guitar. Like d the solo at 1:30 that gives a different vibe. ++ on the name drops.

Cybronica - There's some cool movement in the groove. But the mix/arrangement seems cluttered. It's either too busy or too many instruments are masked and it's tiring to my ears a bit, especially on the chorus. Vocal performance is very good.

WreckdoM - I liked the doubled vox, it's cool. Bells are a plus, love that rising line.

The Friends - It's an interesting arrangement. A pretty decent 3:00 song but maybe a bit much for 4:00+. The title/challenge gaffs probably didn't do you any favors.

Eric Novak - I like the vocal, I like the melody. The arrangement is pretty static and I feel it needs some dynamic contrast. Even with this bridge.

[WreckdoMelle]

Brown Word and the Big Whine - Groove is cool. Vox is mixed well, not too up but clean. Is that a drowning noise?

Thanks for the review! That sound at the end? Capybaras eating watermelon.

[arby]

OKay, my reviews:

BSS - Nice guitar riffs, GREAT solos. I love the slide guitar. This is definitely an above average BSS song. I like the “Wookie” rhyme. At first I thought “We couldn’t find an omnichord” was a subtle LWRG/VP name drop, but Nivs explained to me that you actually are looking for one for a child. Haha!

Brown Word - I loved this! Honestly my favorite of the round. The intro is too long though, you could have done without it. NICE heavy, 60’s guitar riffs. “She was under the magnificant dome of the unblinking sun” is an incredible first line. Yeah I loved everything about this except the samples in the beginning - and the end. I get why you would use an eating sound but it’s still kind of gross! Just saying.

Carlo Bruno Jr - I am sorry but I have a strong genre bias against this one. Jazz is just not my bag. Plus the slow tempo was soporific, and the 30 second of instrumental before any vocal comes in was too boring. It is well played and produced, I just personally didn’t care for it.

Cavedwellers - love the 70s/Steely Dan-esque guitar opening. This is a nice Cavedwellers number. Like the verses a lot but the chorus is kinda meh/cliched, not only bc of the melody but because EVERYONE used the rhyme “cooking” with “Looking”. Did nobody think of using “hooking” instead? Just saying. I agree with whoever said upthread that the random name dropping of record labels is kind of bizarre. Not sure how this meets the challenge, but I did enjoy listening to it.

Cybronica - Very sorry but I found this kind of a mess. I like your operatic singing when you’re doing opera. Not so much when you’re doing pop stylings. Also you are pitchy on the high notes/backing vocals. But I saw your explanation and agree with you that Round 0 is a great time to experiment, so more power to you!

Dutch Widows - guitar tone is very pretty in the beginning. The vocals are kind of blah to me, I don’t know why. They are just sort of a wash of sound that doesn’t hold my interest. Way too short, I see it’s basically a placeholder entry, which is fair for Round 0. I understand you’re not really able to commit to Nur Ein this year. Sorry to see you go.

Eric Novak - There are the makings of quite a good song here. I like the melody and lyrics, and the backing is ok if uninspired. (Plus, thank you so much for my shout-out!!) My biggest problem here is your pitch, you’re scooping all over the place.

The Friends - This is GREAT, my second favorite of the round, I love the 90s/60s wash of sound you’ve got going on. I love a song where everything is swirly and trippy. Very psychedelic, I don’t even mind the flute (usually I’m not a fan) because it’s mixed low enough not to be annoying. Yeah you missed the challenge but I personally don’t have to care (not a judge!), this is an excellent song I will listen to outside the challenge.

Glennny - This starts out kind of a bog-standard Glennny song. The speeding up thing is… okay I guess? I don’t really understand why you even did it, unless you’re trying to double submit for SongFight. By far my biggest issue with this is the rhyme scheme in the chorus. Why the HELL didn’t you say “I'll get cooking up some tasty tacos / like I did for Paco”??? Paco and taco actually rhyme, and you said the Stinko part in the previous line. JUST SAYING

Grumpy Mike - I find white guys rapping amusing. I can’t help it. Some funny lines in here. I did not care for the sung choruses - too Linkin Park meets Weird Al. Otherwise a good entry.

Jellyfish - I like the sound palette here. Vocals are underwhelming but mixed low enough that it didn’t really detract too much. My biggest issue with this is the “Strangely brown” line. It’s just kind of gross. Toilet humor adjacent.

LWRG - Yeah we did it in 3 hours in the rehearsal studio, big deal. We don’t have time to do multiple sessions. We also did not think we were going to be judged on HOW MANY name drops we did, the challenge said, “A past participant” not “more points for how many you can shoehorn in” but I guess that’s always kinda how it works, right? So yeah we didn’t make the best use of the challenge. Eh, it was fun making it and we tried a new genre.

Ken Mahru - Very cute. There’s something very earnest and innocent about this. Again “cooking/overlooked” rhyme. The name-dropping is cleverly done. Nice solos. There’s a lot to like about this.

Le Tits Now - Eh. This is okay. Not a huge fan. That clicking percussion in the chorus is annoying. The vocals are kind of grating for some reason I can’t put my finger on. Maybe it’s just I don’t really like the melody, so you might not have been able to sing it any way that would appeal to me. Sorry.

Lean Mean - I’m torn on this. I like the background, well played and produced. The growly vocals annoyed me at first, and I’m not sure they really grew on me throughout the song. I do like that you took a chance and did something different. Really good bass and guitars.

Max Bombast - The chorus of this is wayyyy too corny in both style and lyrically for my taste. It’s like rockabilly or something, yikes. Then the rap happens. I do like the rap. A lot. Again, white guys rapping always makes me laugh when done even remotely competently. Ha! Great name-drops.

Micah Sommersmith - I am very sorry but I can’t with this. Genre bias, I honestly can’t stand accordion 9 times out of 10. It’s not your fault. It’s just so “oom-pah”. Also your voice has so much vibrato. I like it when you growl, though. This is a perfectly fine effort, if kind of one-note.

Sober - I am SHOCKED (and pleasantly surprised!) that this is not country. It is a little 70s AM radio. This sounds like a long lost Bob Seger song or something, Kenny Loggins. Oh there we have “hook in” as rhyme! Too bad it wasn’t “She said she’d have to start hooking” . Also I am just personally gratified that someone shouted out Starfinger.

Wreckdom - This is very weird. I don’t think I like it. It’s just a collection of weird sounds with bizarre vocals. Now that I write that it sounds like it should be right up my alley. But I think it’s too country-fried for my taste. Sounds like a placeholder entry. OKay now that I hear it again I have to admit the Julia Child sample is pretty funny.

[glennny]

Arby wrote:

Glennny - This starts out kind of a bog-standard Glennny song. The speeding up thing is… okay I guess? I don’t really understand why you even did it, unless you’re trying to double submit for SongFight. By far my biggest issue with this is the rhyme scheme in the chorus. Why the HELL didn’t you say “I'll get cooking up some tasty tacos / like I did for Paco”??? Paco and taco actually rhyme, and you said the Stinko part in the previous line. JUST SAYING

Why did I speed up? i wanted to get cookin'. This is a phrase used for describing playing fast music, especially jazz. I had to start slow in order to get cooking.

Your suggestion for the chorus rhyme does not have the meter I wanted. I don't like perfect rhymes. When you have a perfect rhyme it costs you sincerity. The listener thinks "I don't believe he really made tacos, he just wanted to rhyme with Paco". I enjoy the rhyme of think so- stinko much more. Also i threw tin Paco/taco in as an internal rhyme, which is where something so obvious belongs.

Thank you for the review!

[arby]

Arby wrote:

Glennny - This starts out kind of a bog-standard Glennny song. The speeding up thing is… okay I guess? I don’t really understand why you even did it, unless you’re trying to double submit for SongFight. By far my biggest issue with this is the rhyme scheme in the chorus. Why the HELL didn’t you say “I'll get cooking up some tasty tacos / like I did for Paco”??? Paco and taco actually rhyme, and you said the Stinko part in the previous line. JUST SAYING

Why did I speed up? i wanted to get cookin'. This is a phrase used for describing playing fast music, especially jazz. I had to start slow in order to get cooking.

Your suggestion for the chorus rhyme does not have the meter I wanted. I don't like perfect rhymes. When you have a perfect rhyme it costs you sincerity. The listener thinks "I don't believe he really made tacos, he just wanted to rhyme with Paco". I enjoy the rhyme of think so- stinko much more. Also i threw tin Paco/taco in as an internal rhyme, which is where something so obvious belongs.

Thank you for the review!

interesting! yeah I thought of the prosody issue and I would have added a "just" before the word "like" to make the line long enough. kinda wish someone had "rhymed" Paco with, like, enchilada or something totally wacky.

did not know about the cooking/ jazz reference but like to learn something new, so thanks for that!