The Song Fight Bulletin Board

blue wrote:

jolly roger wrote:80s Song
Dance Song

no way in hell i'm clicking on that.

It's probably for the best.

I'm already going to Hell so I clicked on them. That first one sure is...sensitive. Put your best Barry White on it and take it to the prom. The second, "80's", has some good ideas but floats away somewhere - make it nasty. Good experiments.

there's some interesting ideas in there. I think it's great that you're trying new things and churning stuff out. and keyboards are brilliant cos you can play a melody with one patch and it'll sound completely different to the same melody on another patch or a guitar.
The dance one was best, the drums made me think of Modest Mouse if anything, and that's always a good thing in my book, and the keyboards had that frantic Phantasia swirliness which is cool especially for a first attempt.

Pumpkin Buzzard - Digital Smile

Our love’s not analog
It is digital smile
Been with you all along
And it’s been quite awhile
Together day and night
I wish that you could be here
To help me in my plight
I wish that you could be near
Are you all alone
Where nobody knows

Don’t hurt my digital smile
Digital smile

I woke up on the shore
And I don’t know what for
Let me give you some advice:
We’re going out tonight
But I am all alone
I wish we were back home
I wish I had a home
Please leave my fate alone

This song is from our album Mantis Antler. The album is not yet complete, so the songs (including this one) are bound to be remixed/mastered in the near future. Comments/suggestions welcome.

Since "hey listen to my new album (thread)" does not exist:

Comedies by Flypaper Orchestra

fodroy wrote:Since "hey listen to my new album (thread)" does not exist:

Comedies by Flypaper Orchestra

sweet.

Egg: I will pay you cash money to change your avatar.

It reminds me of Alfred E. Neuman... except real. It's just... disturbing.

On Friday night, actually Saturday Morning, I recorded a bunch of my songs drunk. So if hearing drunk artists butcher their own songs is your thing, have a listen.

Drunk at the Muncie

That's so weird, Sven! Because I've been thinking your avatar looks like a snapping turtle enjoying the midday sun.

<a href="http://www.tomuphoto.com/reptiles/snapp ... g">picture of a turtle changed to a link by admin</a>

<a href="http://wdfw.wa.gov/gallery/albums/Repti ... g">picture of a turtle changed to a link by admin</a>

I don't remember how to resize images, so this might be a little big.

Anyway, I'll oblige.

Please don't change your avatar. I like turtles.

<b>ADMIN SEZ: For this thread to stay in the "Sidefights and Highlights" forum, please STAY ON TOPIC. Otherwise, it gets moved to Monkey Business</b>

Excellent and fair comparison.

(also, thanks. the new avatar is much better)

I'm thinking of changing mine to a scaled-down version of this:

GROSS PICTURE CHANGED TO URL BY ADMIN (please don't do that again, sven), CLICK AT YOUR OWN RISK

Please don't.

OK, I have a song here that I need some feedback on. I'm posting it here so that I can ask some specific questions. I will post to somesongs in due time, but this is maybe a demo mix, depending on response, so it might not be totally finished.

Lay It Down - Jim of Seattle

This is an anniversary present for my wife. I'm giving it to her on Thursday. Before I do, I want to get some opinions. Obviously, I'm not looking for comments on lyrics or melody or anything because it's way too late to change any of that. I'm in the final mix now. I need to know about things I can still change if need be. Here's what I'd like to know:

1) How is the mix, the balance between instruments. Are the vocals too loud or soft? Any instrumental tracks stand out weird?
2) Sometimes there are a lot of instruments, especially in the last couple minutes. Does it ever get muddy? There's a little compression on the final mix. Does that seem OK?
3) In the vein of songs like "Layla" and "My Sweet Lord" and "Hey Jude" and Stevie Wonder's entire Songs in the Key of Life album, the second half of the song is a whole bunch o' repeats. How does this feel? Does it have the intended cool epic end repeat thang going on like those songs I mentioned, or is it just boring and repetitive?
4) What about the piano solo at 5:36? Does it work? I can cut it, and I'm tempted to. Is the energy of the song such that that solo is unwelcome, or is it good?
5) Any other general impressions. Obviously, if you totally love it, don't keep that a secret!

WARNING TO DIAL-UPPERS: THE SONG IS 8 MINUTES LONG AND SO WILL BE A BIG DOWNLOAD

Thanks tons if you can answer any of the above questions.

In your last post, the link had "seatle" with one "t" instead of two. I can't find the link in this new post. I was trying to listen to the song but I'm having Internet problems now. Doh!

Sorry 'bout that. Fixed now.

Nice song, Jim.

I'd tweak 2 things about the mix:
- The ride bell hits on the left, in the middle of the song, are a little too loud.
- The strings in the ride out compete with your vocals. It still sounds nice, but I think it might pop more if the strings were just a bit quieter, and maybe EQ'd out of the vocals' way, a hair.

Otherwise, I'd say it's prefect. The repetition is no prob, 'cause there's so much going on there, the listener's ear jumps from instrument to instrument, so it never actually sounds repetitive. And the piano solo breaks things up before the ride out, so I think it's actually a good thing.

deshead wrote:- The strings in the ride out compete with your vocals. It still sounds nice, but I think it might pop more if the strings were just a bit quieter, and maybe EQ'd out of the vocals' way, a hair.

Thanks, valuable comments.

Ride bell, yeah that's too loud. Good one. When you say to EQ the strings out of the way, is it basically just the same frequency range as the vocals that are competing, or are the highest strings competing too?

Several tracks in the repetition part creep up in volume over that last couple minutes to try and sustain the energy (strings, claps, horns, bg vocals) so maybe I should just creep the strings less?

I'm also bringing up the bass a teeny bit and I don't feel the snare hits so I'm going to EQ the drums a teeny bit. Also the piano solo is too loud.

Haven't been songfighting due to being busy writing "real" songs (joking).

Luke Henley's "Lazy on a Sunday and Reading Books Maybe"

I wanna meet Henry Kissinger
underneath the missile toe.
If you know what I mean, please keep it to yourself.
I am proud of you, though.
Well it seems out there in the world in my tv
everyone wants to die.
And no matter what channel I switch with the pannel,
no one can tell me why.

Chorus: It's like reading a book
and when you get to the middle starts to read like a palindrome.
It's like going to a party and when you get there
all you wanna do is go home.

Omar Sharif.
Come and ride away with me.

It's like knowing that the punch is spiked
and not taking a sip
because you know the punch is made with
Yassir's IV drip.
It's like there's a ghost in your family's photo albums
and you can't shake it off,
so you go outside and you meet your friends
for a round of drunken golf.

Chorus: ...you just want to go home
and you just want to be alone.
And you want to unplug your phone.
Everybody just starts to groan
like you're some crazy son of a bitch.

The cactus outside has 28 arms
and it didn't get them through fightin'.
There're holes inside but it still stands tall
no matter what comes bitin'.
And the sky gets cloudy just when the ground starts
crying out for rain.
And say what you will about rocks,
but they never feel an ounce of pain.

Chorus: ...all you wanna do is go home
all you wanna do is fly to Rome
and drink the wine that runs to you like a poem
by Charles Bukowski in the video store.
I guess everyone just wants a little bit more.

Jim of Seattle wrote:When you say to EQ the strings out of the way, is it basically just the same frequency range as the vocals that are competing, or are the highest strings competing too?

Ya, just the mid-range stuff. Somewhere between 500 and 800 Hz, I'd guess. Though probably if you just lowered the volume of the strings a hair, that would be enough.

Jim..

Just seen your post, so I ad a listen and I must agree with what Des said. Tho I think the hat in the first passage is a tik too loud also... like the ride.

But like previously said an almost perfect mix, and a really good song.
I'm sure the 'missus' will love it.


Oh yeah and the piano solo has to stay.. Its great

also I doesnt seem to be 8 mins long..... so I gues the repetition aint a problem.. nor the overall length.

Top draw job

Jim - nice! I'd even creep things more, but that's me. In a long section like that I don't feel the vocals need to be front and center the whole time, since we know what they're saying all the way through. I like the variety mixing in a bit. There are always subtle change ups occuring in those kinds of songs, and you capture that well with the textural changes. I think a final mastering would bring more brilliance and punch to the mix, which is a bit flat as it is. The levels are fine (Des' recommendations aside), it just needs that final boost in mastering. Maybe ask Puce to master it?

Cool. I have no idea what I would do to add this punch to the mix. Would that involve a lot of EQing?

This is a GREAT book on the subject. But you're just finishing up. Send Puce a message and see if he has bandwidth this evening to master it for you. He did Glenn's benefit CD last year (among other things) and did a tremendous job. Really.