The Song Fight Bulletin Board

Hey Crates, I think Leaf has a crush on you! He wants to have ANAL SEX WITH YOU!!

AND SO DO I YOU SEXY HUNK OF MAN-BOY!!! Wanna exchange pics? You know, *naked pics*?!?!?!

i've just got to say... i'm not at all disappointed that "crates" pussed out of attending the wayne gig.

I reckon being gay would be pretty cool. You get to hang out with the boys all the time - and if you're having a night out on the piss and you have had a gutful of beer and decide to switch to say, a nice crisp Sauvingnon Blanc - then your mates wouldn't call you a poof - because, you know - you would be a poof and they probably would be too - so everybody's happy.

And in the big scheme of things, would the occaisional obligation to bend over and 'open up the tradesman's entrance' from time to time really be any more unpleasant than changing nappies, visiting in-laws and the general life sentence of servitude and poverty that is the general norm for the unfortunate hetrosexual male?

Not that I'm ready to sign up to dance on a float in next year's Mardi Gras or anything... but, you know...I'm just sayin'...

anti-m wrote:Anchors, I'm sorry you had a sleazy encounter with a gay couple, but saying that 100% of the TWO (count 'em) gay men you've ever met have tried to convert you is hilariously hyperbolic.

hilariously hyperbolic

Caravan Ray wrote:I reckon being gay would be pretty cool.

Yeah, it's pretty sweet. And frankly, if you're doing it correctly, anal sex isn't exactly a chore.

tonetripper wrote:

hahahahah

It stinks like poo, in here.

It's a shame that this thread is three pages long as of right now but Crates' only post was way back on the first page. This would have been a lot more fun if he had kept on trying to illustrate his ignorance.

Duncan, of Level Nivelo wrote: And frankly, if you're doing it correctly, anal sex isn't exactly a chore.

Alright, the guy that puts his dick in the other guys ass experiences pleasure but what about the guy taking it? Does that actually feel good?

The Anchors wrote:

Duncan, of Level Nivelo wrote: And frankly, if you're doing it correctly, anal sex isn't exactly a chore.

Alright, the guy that puts his dick in the other guys ass experiences pleasure but what about the guy taking it? Does that actually feel good?

have you ever enjoyed pooping?

The Anchors wrote:

Duncan, of Level Nivelo wrote: And frankly, if you're doing it correctly, anal sex isn't exactly a chore.

Alright, the guy that puts his dick in the other guys ass experiences pleasure but what about the guy taking it? Does that actually feel good?

It's full of nerve endings back there so I guess that would be a yes.

Really? Do you prefer taking or giving?

You know who had the best anal sex story ever (although it was hetero)? Tucker Max.
http://www.tuckermax.com/archives/entri ... .phtml#278

The Anchors wrote:

Duncan, of Level Nivelo wrote: And frankly, if you're doing it correctly, anal sex isn't exactly a chore.

Alright, the guy that puts his dick in the other guys ass experiences pleasure but what about the guy taking it? Does that actually feel good?

Only one way to find out, baby.

fodroy wrote: have you ever enjoyed pooping?

Probably my favorite thing in the world next to peeing.

fodroy wrote:have you ever enjoyed pooping?

Not enough i suppose.

Let's face it guys: *pooping* and *being on the receiving end of anal sex* are two vastly different things, unless you're into that. And, a discussion having anything to do with anal sex is completely beside the point.

Of course, the thing that we all want to know is, what is the correct procedural etiquitte when two gentleman decide to engage in some amourous recreation of this nature - how do they decide who will...ahem.."open the bowling from the Member's end", so to speak? Do they toss a coin? "If it comes down heads - we'll start with your tail"?

And at the completion of the first round of proceedings - surely 9 times out of 10 - Player A, upon receiving his "Game Over" message will roll over (roll back over?) and go to sleep within ten seconds - leaving Player B with a joystick and a fire button, but nowhere to plug it in.

It sounds like a scenario that is rife with potential for abuse. I would expect that some sort of strict accounting system would be in order to ensure overall orgasmic equity.

Ray, your concern for the well being of the giver of butt-sex moves me.

ray: most would already have a preference and then that would be the way it worked.

since the thread title has changed, it gives me a chance to talk about the newest big wrestler in Japan:



RAZOR RAMON HG!! (HG=Hard Gay)

Hoblit wrote:It's a shame that this thread is three pages long as of right now but Crates' only post was way back on the first page. This would have been a lot more fun if he had kept on trying to illustrate his ignorance.

Fear not, I'm not gonna let you down. I just don't have the time to check this bullshit seventeen times a day.

I'm glad to see my name on the tongue of all the SF regulars... but seriously, are you guys all serious?

If I wasn't going to stick around before, I'm certainly going to now. This shit is just too damn entertaining.

It's like American Idol meets Melrose Place meets Queer Eye for the Straight Guy.

Egg wrote:You were frequently wrong in your attempt at recounting the history of each participant in the Covered in Bugs fight

If my information was wrong, so is the Artist Archive: I took all the information directly from there.

But perhaps you can provide an example?

tonetripper wrote:Seriously gents, ladies he's trolling you all. I wouldn't even be surprised if Crates is a made up character by another SFer for the benefit of creating anarchy at the hands of his otter self.

You got me. I confess, I'm an alternate of a regular, here to troll you all. Ha, ha.

Egg wrote:Such profound stupidity coupled with the hyperbolic claims about life-changing experiences...

Call me a liar all you like... it changes nothing. Each and every one of the things I mentioned has actually happened, without exaggeration.

I'm actually pretty surprised-- I'd have thought a person so obviously more intelligent than myself would recognize a pathologically honest person when he sees one. I'm the first person to say the things you don't want to hear: if some chick is too fat for a pair of pants, she better not ask me about it. When I do say something that's not truthful, it's literally dripping with sarcasm.

But shit, I don't have to convince you of anything. If you sleep better at night thinking that my life hasn't been as illustrious as I claimed it was, and that I have to lie to impress you, go right ahead. I mean, damn, I didn't mean to intimidate you.

blue wrote:crates is not a troll, he's an asshole. there's a difference.

No, seriously: Tone Tripper had it the first time. I'm a troll. My quote-unquote "desk job" actually takes place under a bridge, where I collect tuppence from passersby and eat children.

The Anchors wrote:Didn't Godzilla have eggs, therefore making her a female?

Yeah, Godzilla had an egg, in "Son of Godzilla"... but if Godzilla is the mother, then who would be her baby's daddy?

Seriously, who would fuck that?

Godzilla almost surely adopted that egg.

sausage boy wrote:i have always held the view, the more gay men, the more women left over for me.

That's a good way to look at it.

People are getting side-tracked here... this argument was never about gay people being a problem, it was about my contention that Nivelo's song was F L A M I N G and including that in my review.

Obviously SongFight highly values its homosexual user base-- and not without cause, as it's clearly abundant.

For that reason, I'll keep my contentions about the gayness of any particular artist to myself; not so much that I give a flying fuckstick about how many people are offended, but moreso because all these whiny bitches are giving me a headache.

anti-m wrote:Bottom line: Instantly increase your sex appeal by learning some tolerance!

Believe me when I say I didn't come here to get laid.

Duncan, of Level Nivelo wrote:I'm not particularly offended by him calling me a fag, as I clearly am a fag, as he gleaned from my profile. I've certainly been called worse in my life. And I don't really care if he didn't like my song; I know not everyone will like what I do.

For all you whiny ass shitstains who are beating your head against the wall to defend this man's honor:

This guy is the only one with a fuckin head on his shoulders.

This is the Internet. People are assholes. I'm an asshole, and that's not going to change. Duncan seems to recognize all that. The rest of you are getting yourselves worked up over a stranger's opinion that a song is too queer-sounding-- however caustic that opinion may have been, you're wasting your time.

And to Duncan-- you obviously deserve more respect than I've given you. You've got humility: a quality I admire despite a personal lack thereof.

Duncan, of Level Nivelo wrote:The Bloodhoung Gang song is "I wish I was Queer So I could Get Chicks".

Yep. Funny song. I hear they're coming out with another album soon.

Duncan, of Level Nivelo wrote:That guy who dresses like Peter Pan is straight

No shit?

Leaf wrote:Well, it doesn't fucking matter WHY. I just do. I get riled up... and I think it's because Cratesis ultimately saying things that shows a lack of respect for what I view are the important aspects of the songfight world.
Music, good healthy competition, growth, sharing and friendships.



Then I thought about it so more, and I felt kinda silly.

Like, Songfight has such a mark in my life, that I defend it, and the people I've grown to know as being a part of "it" that I, and others, will defend it and them... it's kinda hilarious and cool at the same time.

What a dork! So what makes this just giggilingily (new word... love it) funny is that Crates comes along like a fucking asshole, all full of piss and vinegar, and ... like, SERIOUSLY publically saying stupid shit like "I'm a dick" and "anal sex is nono" and "me no likey poopey on my dinky) and ...



man. Seriously, I've been laughin for a while. So... uh. Welcome Crates. Enjoy songfight! What a ridiculous way to introduce yourself... you know.. really make a mark.

Leaf finally gets it.

You get a gold star... move to the front of the class.

tviyh wrote:i've just got to say... i'm not at all disappointed that "crates" pussed out of attending the wayne gig.

If attending a funeral in lieu of going to meet strangers from the Internet for an open mic four hours away is pussying out, then I'll admit that I was a pussy.

But I doubt Deacon's aunt would have thought so, were she still with us.

The Anchors wrote:You know who had the best anal sex story ever (although it was hetero)? Tucker Max.

If I ever had a hero, it would be Tucker Max.

Boys, take lessons from that man. Anchors gave you the URL: TuckerMax.Com.





Well, shit-- this has been fun as hell. Keep up the good work, SongFight. You're staving off the boredom from my desk job under the bridge.

-- Crates

Damn! Not to troll but I just saw Crates' picture and I was all like "man that guy is a homo." If you want gay dudes to quit hitting on you maybe put a shirt on besides an undershirt, take the fucking highlights out of your hair, and quit that sassy come-hither stare of yours.

Not everyone can pull off the "shaved head / eye patch / knife in the teeth" pirate look.



Garr, Steve.