Bender for President (Robot Candidate Reviews)

[boltoph]

PiGPEN was more of an ignorant ass in his reviews than Dis. "But hey..." -Piggy's old school or something?

The horror. . . the horror. It's all subjective. I have no special love for PiGPEN. It's just that, well it's all subjective, and well, at least specific reviews are better than generic ones. Even if the specific item is not exactly specific, or the objective is actually subjective, and the human becomes a robot. Or vice versa. Consider the hazing. We need heftier hazing rituals around here; i, for one, was never properly hazed.

[Hoblit]

How did Ben write, record, mix & master that within the time given?

Even if i quit my day job or went on a 7 day vacation and did nothing but write music for a 15 minute rock opera, I would not be able to accomplish THAT.

So Kudos.

[EmbersOfAutumn]

Reviews for Robot Candidate

Normally, the only songs I review are the songs I actually contribute toward. This seems only fair in my opinion, as I would not want to give the impression to anyone that I’m just “sitting here, picking on people without getting my feet wet myself.” Truth be told, I don’t contribute as much as most of the regulars on here, and there’s certainly merit to that statement. However, I was bored today, and felt like doing some reviewing.

Ben Krieger
So we start here with Ben Krieger, and I thought for a minute that I had clicked on the wrong thing when I saw the length of this track. Almost 15 minutes! That’s around 4 minutes longer than an average episode of Spongebob! When the music starts at 1:00, it is nice and catchy, 80’s electronic feel to it, perhaps a Modern English meets U2 feel? (I kind of feeling Sunday, Bloody Sunday for some reason.) I enjoy the first few minutes of the song, but I’m going to be honest, I kinda skipped around. Not to call into question that you did this song… but… it does sort of resemble a sampler CD of a number of songs. The music is good, but the… um… concept of this track is a little weird for as long as it is. I’d give an 9/10 for the music, but a 2/10 for the concept of the track.

City of Dis
Might I suggest psychiatric help? Sounds like a completely different song at 0:50. And it wasn’t any better. 1 of 10.

Elastic Waste Band
Let me just say now—and I haven’t heard ANY other tracks besides the three I’ve commented on so far—I’m sure that many people saw the word “Robot” and thought “Fruity Loops”. That’s fine. Honest. I like these types of songs on occasion, and they make great AudioSurf levels. They just… don’t make a good impression on my reviews because they start getting redundant after awhile. They also, on average, carry very little replay value for me. Mostly because most people view techno/electronica/etc. as potluck, i.e., throw in a bunch of stuff, including sound clips and effects. Now, this song actually is better than average fare in this genre as I know it, and avoid the “anything that makes it into the pot” philosophy, but I’m afraid I can only give you a 5 of 10.

Electro the Wonder Boy
Acoustic Guitar + Dog in Wind Tunnel = Not a song.
Distorted Guitar + Bad Mixing = Hardly a song.
1 of 10.

Flvxxvm Florvm
I like that there’s actual STRUCTURE to this song, but it sounds very familiar for some reason. And VEEEERY 80’s. Like when it picks up, but it still is lacking something. 5 of 10

G3RT
Sounds like Bob Dylan were he the lead singer of Fastball. The music is alright, nothing spectacular. The chorus is catchy, at least much more than the rest of the song around it. The bridge sounds a tad disconnected—perhaps that one is just me though. 5 of 10.

Gibson
Did I win an extra man, cause I swear I’m playing Pac-Man or something here with this music. Oh, and this isn’t a song as much as it is a travellodge music clip. 2 of 10.

Ignite Your Face
Alright—we’re starting with a “Books on Tape” prologue—it can work if done right. Leading into music is very Metallica-ish. The music is a little… well, it needs some bass or something. For what you’re trying to do, i.e. Metal Grunt-singing, you’re going to need the music to drive a little harder. Adding some bass, making the bass drum on the drums stand out, that sort of thing. This needs to reflect also in the distortion. Oh… and the lick is rather annoying. And I think I won another extra man at Pac-Man. 3 of 10.

Kid Cruiser
A little bluesy, and seems like you made it work… And you just lost all my respect with the chorus. I can only hope (please oh please) you were saying “Let’s rub our cogs together”. Otherwise you receive a negative score. 2 of 10. [EDIT: Yup, negative score: -6 of 10.]

Matthew Nellis
This isn’t bad. It needs some cleaning up, but there’s something here. The chorus has a catchy feel to it. This song probably should have ended just a little earlier, but that’s my opinion. 7 of 10.

Melvin
The organ intro is original for you for sure. Leads in slightly awkward, but nothing too standoutish. The ambience is slightly heavy by the time the chorus gets around. I really hate to say this, but this really isn’t the high caliber I usually hear from you. It’s fine overall, but it sounds very experimental—perhaps you were going for that. 6 of 10.

No Horse Town
…Ok, got the volume maxed—let’s try this again. Mixing Error One: The keyboards, which obviously is intended for background flavor with one note at a time, is the loudest track. Mixing Error Two: This song sucks. Which I honestly hate to say, because it sounds like effort was put into it, and you are a newcomer. But, I guess consider this hard love. 2 of 10.

Paco Del Stinko
Damnit, forgot to turn the volume down. OK, the ringing stopped. Well, Paco, I know to expect good driving guitar tracks from you, and this is your usual stable. The rhythm riff is really interesting to listen to—if I based this whole review on it, it would be probably an 8 or 9. But overall, I think I’m going to have to put this around 6 or so.

PiGPEN
The music is good enough to keep me interested, which I’m sad to say sometimes is an accomplishment in itself with some of the submissions on SongFight. Some of the tracks are a little fuzzy… You could have intended it, but it slightly detracts from the song. Also, at 2:00, it wasn’t too long or too short, based on the song. I think, overall, this wasn’t that bad. 6 of 10.

Renwick
Ignite Your Face, if you’re still reading, this is an example of what I was referring to with the mixing. Nice and heavy, which is what you were going for. The beat is off, but in that “I did it on purpose” way where the beats all still add up, so I guess, according to the rules, is fine. Fuzz on the distortion could be dropped just a little, again, my opinion. I think it steals the lead guitar’s thunder during the bridge. I like the lead licks during the last chorus though. Best song yet, for sure. 8 of 10.

Robots Do The Work
Not bad intro. At first, I thought you named the band simply for this song, but you’ve done other projects (before my time), so I can’t point a finger at you for that. This song… is… really… good. Very Oasis feel to it. Echo on vocals is nice. This is worthy of a download, if not the vote. We’ll see with the last few bands. 10 of 10.

Signboy
Brought to you by Nyquil—The sniffling, sneezing, coughy head, etc… Phew, kinda making me a little sleepy. Not that it’s always bad to want to have that effect. That was just the first thing that came into my head. This song is weird. It… on the one hand, it works. I can’t put my finger on any specific thing that is wrong with it. On the other, though, something doesn’t seem to work. It’s like one of those pictures you stare at and are expected to find what doesn’t belong—and you can tell SOMETHING doesn’t, but you’re not sure what right away. Then again, as I’ve mentioned a few times, it could be my opinion. Kicking in at 2:50 is good. I’ll give you a 7 of 10 for it.

The Sober Irishman
The little rap is clever, and worth a couple of points, because it can be tricky to get the timing just right on it. Problem: The rap had a ‘build-up’ feel to it, which just didn’t deliver come chorus-time. There should have been more of a distortion-rock chorus after all of that. Here again, this seems to work and, at the same time, is missing something. It isn’t bad, and, like Signboy, is worth a 7 or 10.

The Wax Malachai Confessions
Nothing ticks me off more than going the “Voices in my head” route with a song. It…doesn’t…work. And your song REALLY doesn’t. 0 of 10.

Weakest Suit
The worst part about your band name starting with a ‘W’ is that you’re always the last song I get to hear. I like the guitar a lot, especially after the 0:20 or so intro. I really hope that you get something in the near future to help the recording quality of your music—I really don’t like the lo-fi style of music, but the songs are always fine. 6 of 10.

For the new guys or those not used to my review, I tend to nitpick. It’s cause I do satire editorials, and I have fun doing them. Take what I say with a grain of salt—there’s truth to be found in the words, but take it light-heartedly.

Except for those of you who suck.

[BenKrieger]

How did Ben write, record, mix & master that within the time given?

i was up at 5am. and late to work a lot last week.

[thehipcola]

It's been a huge long time since I was last kicking around, so greets to everyone. Yo.

Here's half of my reviews...I hope the other half come along tomorrow.

No horse town
-lyrics and melody delivering them are cool. Feels like some of this is a bit throwaway. I dig it for novelty appeal, but would only listen to this once. Kind of robotic music I guess.

City of Dis
Is mono necessary? This might work better for me if some of the crappy sounds were panned around a little. Thankfully it’s short. Redeeming factor was the robot voice delay/gate stuff... ‘cuz you can’t ever have enough robot voice bits. I wonder if I’ll feel the same after the rest of the fight.

Ignite your face
I’m digging the musical theme-ness of this enough to not stop it. The clipping drives me nuts though. I like the lyric treatment.... kind of cool. If it were just slightly better handled production-wise, I’d be keeping this. I do like the ending, except for the early chop on the last word.

Signboy
I like the beat that gets around my head. And that dirty bass sample is cool. I like the mood of this piece. There’s some kind of vinyl pop or something in the left side that gets a bit distracting with headphones on. Vocals could be shined up a bit to sit a bit more prominently imo...there isn’t a lot of midrange bite to the song, so it wouldn’t need much. I like the outro and the song in general. Keeper.

Sober Irishman
Not sold on the different parts strung together...the dist. beat that intros the song coming back a bit later feels wrong to me. I find the style of flo doesn’t gel with the instru-chorus well. But those are personal tastes only..the tune is well constructed and sounds good. Alright...the refrain works better next time around. I’m down. I enjoyed this, despite some misgivings early on. Keeper. Except the bit-reduced beat...which is tired, but guess maybe robotic-ish...

Flvxxvm florvm
I love the sound of the vocals...the warbly snarliness. I find the theme of politics due to the word candidate in the title to be obvious. But the lyrics are better than I could do, so ... This song would grab me better with more interesting drum sounds and/or playing/programming. Was that a bad cut at the end or my quicktime player?

Electro the Wonderboy
Not for me.

Elastic Wasteband
Vocoder is obvious. Can’t think of many good uses for vocoder anyways, so I guess it might as well be in a robot song. I like the backing music and melody. Very campy. Nice, and rather showy, which I like. Great ending chord.

[PiGPEN]

PiGPEN was more of an ignorant ass in his reviews than Dis.

You mustve only read the one for you......or been heavily impressed by the one for you.
I HAD A RIGHT TO BE AN IGNORANT ASS ON YOURS THOUGH BECAUSE I COULD BARELY HEAR IT (making me ignorant) AND WHAT I DID HEAR I DIDNT LIKE (making me an ass to you).

"But hey..." -Piggy's old school or something? Gawd, I wish you guys would stop proving me right. Good ol' boys club - you fucking know what I'm talking about.

I do not think this is true....i surely dont participate enough here to be part of the secret gay sex club.

EDIT: PiGPEN's website is really funny. I mean, I really liked it. Shucks.

Youre only distancing yourself further from everyone else with comments like that.

[Paco Del Stinko]

ben krieger - An obviously incredible production from a fertile imagination. All the sections are well performed and put together, sound fantastic. There's not much else to say that hasn't been commented on, but I found it interesting how upbeat, or even sunny feeling, the entire epic is. For some of the themes, there could've been some real moody elements. This isn't a complaint, rather an observation. I mean, it rocks harder in some parts than others, but maybe some deeper, darker depths would make the sun even brighter when it comes back out. Way impressive, I liked the first section and the one near 12:00 minutes in, the best.

City of Dis - I like most of the chord progression very much. The vocal is somewhat silly, but I like the stuttery section. There're some neat ideas in here, and perhaps the main point was to be unconventional, which is fine. I might've liked a more traditional approach to better exploit the stronger ideas. Not because I'm scared of anything new, but rather because I think it could have been more effective.

Elastic Waste Band - I like the 'retro' feel of this, and want to wear some pink and aqua triangle sunglasses while listening. Of course, I could only wear those for so long before I felt a little silly. I like the classical-ish sounding melody, and can hear that working on most anything. Fits in well here, and the song feels good at this length. Good arrangement, and I like how I can recognize whose voice it is singing, although all robotized.

Electro the Wonder Boy - The distorted part of the vocal sounded like it had promise, but delivered nothing. The rest is wobbly but more on the mark if still cheap. Some good scraps of ideas in here, underdeveloped.

Flvxxvm Florvm - Pretty clean for swamp rock. I like the licks and the change from the main section to the E D C D part. The change-up is secretly Sabbath-like, over jungle drums. I can't make out the lyrics well, glad that you posted them. The no bullshit approach works well here, but after the rocking part, the main section feels a little wimpy.

G3RT - The chorus trumps the verses, which are plenty cool with that distinctive voice. Dig the piano accents there very much, like a carrot instead of a chip with the onion dip. I like all the folks who make up this combo, and together it's almost too much. The bridge is nice, if it almost daydreams a bit too much, and the return to the chorus feels half-baked afterwards. Still, this song gets you up and out of your chair. More dip, please!

Gibson - Another in a long line of TMBG-ish songs here. Not quite up to that level of greatness, perhaps, but happily quirky. I like the almost too excited drum track, and the melody much. The lyrics are clever and if only we had control over our candidates as you suggest with this fellow. I probably would vote for Bill in real life, I don't know about here. (But can't rule it out either)

Ignite Your Face - I'd like to hear some throat shredding vocals here, and have to duck from the blood spittles issued forth from the assault. There are ideas here that are OK, but it's like: here's a part-pause-here's another part-pause-here's...etc. Buckethead inspired guitfiddle parts. Maybe push it further over the top, or pull it way back into Coolsville by expanding on one section.

Kid Cruiser - Such good singing and playing. It doesn't matter that it's tongue in cheek (maybe) as the vocals are so good. Any creepiness comes from the whispery part at the end, it's much more intimate than the proclamation of desire to rub. I would guess that this is too easy for you to do. The uh, writing and recording, that is.

Matthew Nellis - Gotta jump on the drumming here. It's nice and energetic, but almost too much so. On first listen it sounds like the instruments are too separate from the drums, too much sitting on top and recorded afterwards sounding. The bass and vocal lines are pleasant and well done, as is the guitar. The smooth guitar solo fits in well, I kept waiting for it to arrive, and was relieved when it did. Decent song that could be elevated some more, maybe via added/subtracted instruments.

Melvin - I didn't like the drums cutting out there a couple times; I don't know why. But the elevated chorus sounds great afterwards, all church-like or something. It's funny, because the sun is out during this song, but dark clouds are still visible both thematically and production-wise, I think. I enjoy the guitar as accent here, and the reliance on keys for structure, it makes for a nice change from just giant guitar. Of course, giant guitar is always welcome!

No Horse Town - I like the demented Japanese White Album guitar riff, and also the little circus organ runs. The vocal delivery is better during the verses and less pushed over the top feeling. Nice build as it goes, as it also somehow kind of falls apart at the same time. Sometimes bigger is better, and production-wise, that would apply here, and I am aware that you are doing what you can. Regardless, I like the overall feel of this although it peters out a bit at the end.

Paco del Stinko - A quick one-dayer done at the last minute. I like the main riff, to a point, and the last section as well.

PiGPEN - Trademark minor key synth sounds back in full force. I like the hints of video game riffs, and the bumpy-ride beat. A big, fat sounding change or bass line plowing through right in the middle would've been cool. I like this, if a bit incomplete feeling. Wah! You were supposed to vote for me! Wah! Looks like a candidate that needs a punch, regardless of being a she or not.

Renwick - Despite gigantic guitars, I think it's the vocal line that I like the best. David Gilmour-ish, I think. Simple, effective melody. The progression is interesting, as it almost feels like it wants to wander, but manages to stay on path. I'm not caring for the lead accents here and the ending leaves you hanging a bit, but overall, a good rumbly feel that's quite enjoyable.

Robots do the Work - This feels sincere, and well delivered, but I'm not enjoying the 1-2-3-4 downstroke feel of it, for some reason. Anyway, nice voice with a great delivery and good melodies. The way-chorused out vocals at the end are a nice touch. Well structured and arranged, this should fare well in the voting process. Would work well with slo-mo video accompaniment.

signboy - I keep expecting this to break out into Shaft territory, but can't say that I'm disappointed with where it goes. I like the "I could have been..." attitude. Very nice touches on the keys, they build nicely without distracting. The layering is the biggest strength throughout, although the melody in the chorus is pretty strong. Laid-back, good stuff.

The Sober Irishman - Good for how quickly you said that you did it. I prefer the more straight-up brush beat over the broken bit beat, and the keys and guitars are just enough and not overdone. I wonder if a touch more zippety do on the tempo wouldn't have hurt, but the shuffly feel is pretty cool. Hopefully you'll have more time next time, as this one feels a bit incomplete despite its strengths.

The Wax Malachai Confessions - Coated in Lame-oleum, the sick whale sounds are the best part of it. I'd like the hear the vocals more, I think, as only some are understandable. Feels too much of a toss-off that didn't work or maintain much charm. Try again.

The Weakest Suit- Feels like a quicky for you, a bit too scratch paddy. Fleshed out a bit more, this would be much stronger. I like the softer parts after the more aggressive verses, and they would be even headier with a different production. Yeah, I know, time and all, and production doesn't necessarily a good song make. But I do think it would be a plus here, although I like the approach to the subject not being about a political candidate. Even better!

[ujnhunter]

i surely dont participate enough here to be part of the secret gay sex club.

where is the signup form?

[Sober]

Does no one really recognize where the drum sample in my song comes from? Not one person has placed it yet.

Boyz ii Men - Water Runs Dry

[Spud]

i surely dont participate enough here to be part of the secret gay sex club.

where is the signup form?

It's by invitation only, and I can assure you, I have never had secret gay sex with PiGPEN. It's all been out in the open.

[melvin]

I didn't like the drums cutting out there a couple times

I can't help but wonder if my little production "trick" is actually a production "flaw" in the real world. See, during the verses, the drums don't completely drop out--there's actually a massive sub-bass kick placed in the holes, but it's only audible on speakers with good response below, say, 100hz. So, unless you're listening to the track in an appropriately pimped out Escalade, this sonic nuance could easily be missed.

Anyway, everything about my entry was last-minute and half-baked, and I appreciate the time people spent listening and writing reviews. I haven't reviewed in the last several fights, and will try to renew my review Karma in the coming fight.

[Paco Del Stinko]

Does no one really recognize where the drum sample in my song comes from? Not one person has placed it yet.

Boyz ii Men - Water Runs Dry

No, it must be played at the secret gay sex club. (My application hasn't been accepted yet )

Melvin - Neither my wimpy computer speakers nor teeny headphone bud thingys are pimped out. Now I'm too scared to play it on my stereo though! Interesting, and thanks for the poop.

[TheCapitalistYouth]

Now that everyone is moving on with their lives, here's a song I recorded with my wife way past the deadline:
States That Mate - Robot Candidate

[The Weakest Suit]

my robot candidate song is now a true story:
http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,465844,00.html
the body of a supermodel and the hardware of a Super Nintendo indeed...

[Billy's Little Trip]

my robot candidate song is now a true story:
http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,465844,00.html
the body of a supermodel and the hardware of a Super Nintendo indeed...

HaHaHa! "Why did you do that for, it's hurt" The vid

He say, "she has sensors in her body including her private parts, and yes even down there."............."Aiko is still a virgin, AND NO I do not sleep with her"
LIER!

[Chadderandom]

Its funny that this thread was bumped because this was one of those fights I entered where since I only entered every once and a while, I'd just randomly come up with whatever stupid name I could, instead of going with a (regular stupid) name I would usually make music under... thats not really why its funny though.

The Wax Malachai Confessions - Coated in Lame-oleum, the sick whale sounds are the best part of it. I'd like the hear the vocals more, I think, as only some are understandable. Feels too much of a toss-off that didn't work or maintain much charm. Try again.

The try again part was the funny part because most of this stuff will apply to this weeks entry. I mean, I didn't really try again with the particular style of that song but there are vaguely similar sick whale sounds, buried vocals (this time more intentional, at least on the verse) and really all just put together for the simple excuse of wanting to put all my new instruments to work, I think my excuse for Robot Candidate was I was trying to see if I could make an *insert band* type song, I want to say Earth but it sounds nothing like Earth really, so who knows.

Anyway, I guess we'll see if I achieved something beyond Lame-oleum this time. I won't be holding my breath though.