The Song Fight Bulletin Board

deshead wrote:

Poor June wrote:

J$ wrote:No, it doesn't.

i'm pretty sure it does... if i could do a mash-up i'd show you what i was talkin' bout...

Not exactly a mashup, but here ya go, PJ. (And FWIW, I think you're both right )

see i told ya!!!...
yea not exactly, but exact same places i was thinking of... pretty cool \m/

deshead wrote:

Poor June wrote:

J$ wrote:No, it doesn't.

i'm pretty sure it does... if i could do a mash-up i'd show you what i was talkin' bout...

Not exactly a mashup, but here ya go, PJ. (And FWIW, I think you're both right )

Ahhhhh, that bit! Deshead, you have too much time on your hands

It's a co-incidence. I was ripping off a Johnny Cash melody. Heh.

j$

Edge of LA wrote:I JUST started playing with Garage Band in September, so I'm kinda green in the production end of recording. So "insinuations" that I was trying to be slick ("...and turned out greasy") is kind of a compliment to me!

That wasn't meant to be a dig. Was just the usual biased opinion. Certainly keep it going. Nice work!

no worries Roymond... I didn't take it as a dig. I flattered. In time maybe I'll learn how to be more slick... but of course I'll have to buy better software and more memory!!!!

I forgot to mention that I also downloaded:
Lonbobby Experiment et al.. I really dug the arsty-experimental VIBE of the whole thing.

reviews. IMO. Written as I listen. Apologies in advance to people whose songs come further down the stream. My attention span isn't great at the best of times ... oh and I haven't checked for spelling either ...

Abercedarian - nice visual story. Although I might hang back a verse before getting to the meat. The backing vocals are a little overpowering on the lead vocal through the verse. Maybe not too loud - maybe pan them further apart? A few duff ntoes in this case add to the character. A little thin for my tastes, instrument wise but very nicely done? Maybe 30-45 seconds too long, as well.

AWHAM - A few of those 'farrrs' are dragged a little too long. this has got a nice depressing goth lilt to it. Nice production. I like the softness of your voice. This reminds me of poor june in an odd but good way

Boltoph - but the songfight 80s revival was last week! The vocals are a little spongey in the mix. It's a nice bass groove you've got going on, but it could do with a nastier edge to some of the instrumentation. It glides past very pleasantly, and is well done, but nothing is reaching out and grabbing me by the metaphorical testicles.

CCS - Pee Wee Herman got arrested, right? ha. No, I like CCS songs a lot, although I prefer the ones that sound like they are produced by a 20s Flapper. Still, it's Wacky! Wild! Wonderful! Lots of capital Ws. That sort of thing.

Children of God - what a great opening. I'm not sure I can put up with 3 minutes of the duck-caught-in-a-mangler squawking. The guitar part is a bit stale, but well played /produced. If this a horrible slowed down trippy bit as a bridge, I'll be disappointed. Oh, there it is. Disappointed! Write a bridge! Take the duck out of the mangler and let loose- then you'll be tremendous. IMO. And what do I know?

clayne - break out the guitars, man! Or at least a nice little hooky thang counterpointing the great stompy chords. Weirdly, I could hear this a west coast rap song. Only produced in the style of an indie trip-hop thang. Very pleasant. But the lyric isn't grabbing me and with many songs to go, I find my interest wandering unfairly.

David O - so are The 'Over over? Anyway, I am hearing 'Furry Green Atom Bowl' all over this. I think the relaxed vibe of this and your entry last week seem a little studied. If you want to sound like you're stoned in the studio, I reccommend getting stoned. Or changing to a stronger prescription. Anyway, nicely performed and produced, and not your fault the fight was huge enough for this to disappear for me.

DDDog - tap tap tap. Pretty enough tune, and I like your voice, but slightly saddened that the 'God & Shit' receipe for humour is so readily relied upon.

Deshead - I like this actually. Fast Bluesgrass issues not withstanding. Inconsequential but nicely done in an oh-so-crodwed genre And heroically short.

Edge of LA - This is nice. I would have used that famous 'boooing!' sample right after the 6 million dollar man reference. If you're gonna be cheesy, revel in it! Drums are occasionally sloppy (well in the chorus actually) - not bad at all.

Fluffy - I love the melody coming out of each verse (the 'run faster' line) and I love the little leap on 'explode' and on. That's a Fluffy trademark. Nice swell of the drums at 2.45 ish. Oh this should so have had a key change at about 3.00 minutes. Nice little tune though. Slight trippy radiohead feel about it.

Historyman - why are the vocals are so quiet and panned to the right so hard at the beginning? Is it art? nice piano and kazoo (?) While I welcome your Wreckdom meets 'New York Telephone Conversation' Lou Reed influence, I think this song (or collection of song-vignettes) doesn't support the song length. No - more than one too many changes. Each section (or most of them) are pretty damn good, but music is as much the notes you leave out as the one's you leave in (he said, aware that this sounds incredibly patronising. So, sue me). the lyric's pretty cute.

Honest Abe & his Emancipators - basswank fills me with fear, I am afraid, more so than fretwank. Sort of thing you might expect to hear on the 'Flashback' soundtrack (dennis hopper and kiefer sutherland. If you don't know the one I mean, consider yourself lucky.) Good mix, nice blend of voices, drum sound is good but a little too clean. yeah, with a bit more dirt in the production this could be a really good 70s SF type rock song but as it stands it sounds like a pastiche because it's a bit too clean. More mud on the edges!

Jack Shite - The acoustic is too quiet. Is the lyric about one cousin running away from the other, because that's what the music suggests Cute! But i would turn the acoustic up.

Jim Varney All Stars - I liked this very much up until the Star Trek Convention reference, and the guitar solo, which shouldn't be sped up. So short as it is it could have been 15 seconds shorter. Or eight minutes longer, of course.

j$ - Andy Balham played the part of my guilty conscience at this performance. After a year I finally managed to record a duet, of sorts. Similarities to the theme tune of 'Steptoe and Son' are deliberate.

Kapitano - I like this, it's like a slowed down Associates. Or maybe an early Ultravox. eat my references, American readers! Your vocal is a bit quiet. I like oscillator-type thingies that go wibble, so i'm quids-in here!

LLL - This has a recorded in the rehearsal room feel to it. Not bad. I am sorry, I am seriously running out of reviewing energy at this point.

Lonbobby Experiments with Autotone - and Johnny Cashpoint experiments with the volume knob ... couldn't resist that, sorry. Actually I don't think of this as very experimental, except in a 'Let's Feed Cher Ketamine' way, but I like it. It's a really pretty melody you've got there.

Poor June - The piano tone is nice at the beginning.

Roymond feat. Abom - the line between art as music and music as art is wider than I thought, obviously Ah no this is pretty enough and well-done but it needs more bass in the mix. To root it down.

W - Boring.

No truly bad songs, but not that many that really crept up and figuratively slit my throat with a razorblade either.

I liked Abercedarian, but does he mean it, maaannn?

I liked Jack Shite because it made me smile but it's too much of a pastiche to win my vote. I know he doesn't mean it, maaannn.

I actually liked Historyman very very much if only it had been a little more reined in. I might still vote for that, or

Lonbobby for the melody and the edginess of the voice set against the music.

j$

hey j$,

apparently my song didn't make it into the stream. i'd love to get a review if you're able to download the mp3.

j$ wrote:
I liked Jack Shite because it made me smile but it's too much of a pastiche to win my vote. I know he doesn't mean it, maaannn.

j$

man. i can't even count on you for the pastiche vote.....

whatever the pastiche vote is....

Humbert wrote:hey j$,

apparently my song didn't make it into the stream. i'd love to get a review if you're able to download the mp3.

Sure, will do, I will check it out and post again.

And Jack, you got my vote over at remixfight so try not to be greedy! In all honesty, i really did like yr song, but it had unfortunate, accidental echoes of a song I don't imagine ever made it to the states - 'Cotton-Eyed Joe' and I couldn't see past that ...

j$

ok. all these references to this "cotton eye joe" song and i swear to god i've never heard it. any usual coincidence on my part is this time accidental and not intentional.

mutter....must go find find this cotton eye joe song....mutter

I always hated that song, Jack, so I wouldn't bother if I were you. I was trying to say that if it hadn't been for that, I might have been inclined to vote for your good song, rather than giving it number 3 placing ...

Humbert - I am being really dumb - i have refreshed the front page a hundred times (well four times actually) and scrolled up and down loads, but I just can't see it. Is it under a different name? I will review it when i can hear it, I promise ...

j$

j$ wrote:Children of God - what a great opening. If this a horrible slowed down trippy bit as a bridge, I'll be disappointed. Oh, there it is. Disappointed! Write a bridge!

Thanks @ the opening. I tried to make it sound like an unrecognizable alien instrument playing in an unrecognizable scale. I'm fishing for songwriting tips: would you mind naming a few songs with good bridges? Thanks.

Puce wrote:

j$ wrote: I'm fishing for songwriting tips: would you mind naming a few songs with good bridges? Thanks.

In my book, bridges, quite often in their very presence , regardless of inherent quality, makes the overall sng better especially if it makes you feel like you're listening to the song a second time when you come out of the bridge.

I know that doesn't really answer your question. I will try and think of some examples and come back to you. i think my disappointment was I was really enjoying it up to that point but a little part of me thought there's gonna be a bit of filler to break up the noise elements - I hope it continues/compliments the song rather than breaks the mood.

Oh, and I meant that duck in a mangler comment in a nice way! My original reaction was to put 'stop trying to sound like slipknot' which I am sure you'll agree is far less accurate and far less nice ...

j$

Off the top of my head...
The Strokes 12:51 has a great bridge,
Most beatles songs have good bridges...
Gonna post more when I think of more...

A good bridge should give you an entirely new take on the whole song. It should push the song into completely different territory, make you realize "aha, that's what that song is about!" The worst thing you can do in a bridge is just say the same old shit you've said in the rest of the song.

Musically, it provides enough variation to sound different (for variety) but not enough that it sounds like a different song. What Jay-Dolla said above is true, too.

Lonbobby wrote:Kapitano: I like the elctronic arrangement, but the voice doesn't fit the genre. The melody is repititive and uninteresting. I'd like to hear this as a (G-d forbid!) instrumental. Some of the instrument choices are cliche and overused but that's a minor complaint.

I did consider at one point submitting it as an instrumental, but some people here have snotty attitudes about wordless music.

Cliche? Why are strummed guitars or real drums never called that?

jack shite wrote:there's some cool parts to the mix but it starts to drag as it goes on. it needs some serious beat to get my booty shakin and wake me up. for a gothy sort of thing, it's fairly well done but you look at the cure and how they make gothy goodness and it's because it's got the hook,

Goth?! Me!? I enjoy the Sisters of Mercy (and indeed Laibach and Delerium) as much as anyone. But Kapitano has never tried to write anything gothy. As for your booty, I'm not a dance act.

Roymond wrote:I don't go for this style but you pull it off well. I like the leading bass line used this way, but there are a couple chords that are so ambiguous and they don't seem constructive.

As far as I remember, there are four chords: Caug, Cmaj, CaugIII and CmajIII. So, nothing that should sound surprising or ambigious. Maybe it's the way they interact with the bassline.

abcedarian wrote:The vocals are pretty soft on this. I like that samples of voices inserted occasionally.

Yes, I was trying some new mixing and production techniques, but they didn't really work. Plus, I wasn't happy with the vocals, so buried them a bit.

The samples are from the 1970s science fiction series Blake's 7 - second time I've use the show on songfight.

nicegeoff wrote:This really got better than I thought it would after the first 30 seconds…This song feels like a crazy old 60 year old man discovered Reason and decided to write a song…which is wonderful.

Now I know what it feels like to be insulted by a compliment.

boltoph wrote:The vibe here is disjointed and fails to flow and defies tonality.

"Defies tonality". Do you mean I sing out of tune? All the notes are pentatonic C Major.

humbert wrote:i imagine this is what joy division would have sounded like if they bought moogs instead of guitars.

As a Joy Division fan, I treasure that comment.

Puce wrote:What synth do you use? I don’t feel the over-modulated lead synth in the intro fits with the simple sounding Moog bass. Brutally ambient. Very dull. Needs a hook, or at least some 80’s cheesiness added in.

All the synths are Reason's SUbTractor. They're all the results of my experimentation with FM synthesis, so it's more DX7 than Moog.

I do tend towards the ambient end of synthpop, but to call it "brutally ambient" is bizzare. It's more Pet Shop Boys than Enigma, and nowhere near Autchere or Eno.

As for 80's cheese, what could be more 80s than DX7 synths and TR707 drums?

Deshead wrote:

<waves> Hey! You missed me!

J$ wrote:I like this, it's like a slowed down Associates. Or maybe an early Ultravox. eat my references, American readers! Your vocal is a bit quiet. I like oscillator-type thingies that go wibble, so i'm quids-in here!

It began as a ripoff from What's On Your Mind by Information Society (bass and vocal) and Oi! by Orbital (intro).

I must remember to use more wibbly oscillators in future.

hey kapitano, what about your review on my review of you?

j$ wrote:I'm fishing for songwriting tips: would you mind naming a few songs with good bridges? Thanks.

I started this thread a while ago:
http://www.dumbrella.com//ubb/ultimateb ... 6;t=001026

As some would say, I am writing this as I listen. With so many songs, I will only give each song 30 seconds. If I like it in the first 30 seconds, I will listen to the whole schlmeel.

Boltoph - I like the first swoop. People my age might say this has an 80s vibe. The bass is cool. Nice start to the fight. I will listen all the way thru. Tell me about the bass, I like the staccato feel. Good work. B+
Children of God- oooh sorry
C. Layne- Use that Pan knob!! Good dual kbd patches.. Oooh- that ascending bass dealie. SOunds 80s as well. Like some one hit wonder band from LA. See, lyrics don't have to be good to make a song entertaining. I have based my musical career on this fact. Of course, I haven't made much $$$. But good job. B
David 'Over- Hey my last name for reals starts with Over. Sorry, didn't make the cut. Maybe the end was good.
Dee Dee Dog- Is there any chance that is real snare drum? Ok bye
fluffy porcupine- Full sound on that gtr (bass?) Timing a bit off when it comes in. all... fall... seventh on the vocal melody... earth... Tell me about the drums. B
Historyman- what is slalom?
Abecedarian- Sounds like an AAD track. C
Roymond feat. Abom- Starting with a sample works well considering my short attention span format. What's a B35, BX9? M23? Q32? I will google after the fight. You have that Beck ultra fuzz tone. Oooh a rap. The backwards loop, nice. C'est vrai. This is good. Real good, Clark. B+
Carol Cleveland Sings- Whoa, I left my crack at home. The split on the vocal is good. Oh, I just noticed the other vocal. A lot of work went into this. B-
Edge of LA- Sounds like a song I would write. Let's see where it goes. Yeah, I think I played bass on this. Is the gtr direct line in? I am just not a fan of drum machines with rock music. But what can ya do. I like myself today. B
Jack Shite- Ooh, tempting opening. You are a very good violin player. What? That's not you? My faith has been shattered. This is very well put together. As someone not on the cutting edge of technology, please inform me about the fiddle. Seriously. I want to know. B
Lonbobby Experiments with Autotune-
Poor June-
WreckdoM- Let it rock... Ok, is that the beat? Uh huh... well, it's after 30 sec, so I must give you a grade. C-- aka D++
Location Location Location- I need to get out of the 4/4 trap. Real drums? You get points for real sounding drums. Maybe we need a technical specs thread... Ya know, people just post what they did to get the sounds, etc. Yeah. Maybe I will start one. I have never started a thread. I've been here since April. Am I still an Uber Noob? OK back to the song. This is pleasant. My in laws would like it. B
Kapitano- Deeeelaaaay on the saample. You need to post the details of this up on the technical specs thread. Why doesn't anyone use that thread??? Sheesh. And so the conversation turned, until the sun went down. And many fantasies were learned. C+
Jim Varney All Stars- oh no
Andre Was Here at Midnight- Andre. I want you to tell me what your 5 best songs are. I will listen to them.
Johnny Cashpoint- J$, if I wrote a song for you, would you record it? We Americans secretly wish we could sound like you guys over in the UK. But I would rather hear a Brit actor doing a US accent (as Kate Winslet does well) than to hear a yank try to sound like they're from Leeds. B
Honestand and the Emancipators- 28, 29...30!
Deshead- An actual song. Wait, didn't I hear this on "alternative" radio in 1884? Or was it 1994? Yeah, the second one is more likely. This is good. Great vocal. B+

I am so damn stingy with those 'A's!! Sorry. I will listen to the B+s again and vote. Until then...

Tony Asbestos wrote:Historyman- what is slalom?

Um...? A kind of ski course?

I don't think I ever said slalom in my song. The lyrics are there, if you want to take a look at them.

And yes, I am in the process of reviewing. It will be done in... well, soonish. Trying to give each song the time it deserves.

Tony Asbestos wrote:Johnny Cashpoint- J$, if I wrote a song for you, would you record it?

Of course I would. Would be very flattered.

j$

Wouldn't a C-- be a D+-, not a D++?

Tony Asbestos wrote:With so many songs, I will only give each song 30 seconds.

If you think that was a lot of songs, you shoulda been around for one like Accelerator, before they split the fights.
-bill

kapitano wrote:

boltoph wrote:The vibe here is disjointed and fails to flow and defies tonality.

"Defies tonality". Do you mean I sing out of tune? All the notes are pentatonic C Major.

Hi Kapitano, I mean during the verse, the lowest bass note you hit seems to want be a suspension of something but it's treated like a root (sorry about the musical techie mumbo jumbo) but it leaves a weird sort of unresolved feeling. Then in the chorus, the line "they say a man cannot serve two masters" really feels in a different key than the music behind it, I guess that's what I mean by disjointed or defying tonality. It's like it just gets weird during the "two masters". Anyhow, I do like stuff about the song, like the breaks and the soundclips. Sorry didn't mean to be overcritical.

Tony Asbestos wrote:Boltoph - I like the first swoop. People my age might say this has an 80s vibe. The bass is cool. Nice start to the fight. I will listen all the way thru. Tell me about the bass...

Yeah, I was thinking Police, kinda purposely did the guitars in a sort of Andy Summers sparse fashion. About the bass: I plugged into a small Carvin 60 watt tube amp through a 15" cabinet, using the overdrive channel and turning up the overdrive until it just starts to clip. I have this big foam workout pad that I use as an enclosure for the speaker and mic. I mic it about a foot directly in front of the speaker with this Octava large condenser that I have. I crank up that bass amp and pad the mic at -5db. Then that mic goes thru a tube pre (I set the input pretty hot so that I start to get some compression out of that too), then through DBX compressor (medium / slow attack / release times), and for this recording, into an cassette tape 4 track. Oh yes I also ran the direct line thru the pre and compressor and mixed a tiny bit of that signal with the mic.
Thanks for being way more optimistic about my song than I am. Next time I hope to have a digital recording with acoustic guitar and such.