Nur Ein VI Round Zero "First Blood"

[Niveous]

BLT, You're lucky that I just happened to have my FTP open and hadn't already left on my day trip. You're in.

Round Zero is here for many reasons. One reason is to get use to delivering the song at the deadline.

[JonPorobil]

Yay!

[RangerDenni]

Gum, I wish you'd finished yours- the lyrics were bitchin and it woulda been cool! You better record it anyway!!!

Yay on BLT being in!!

(BTW, thanks as always for comments folks.. will review in the next couple and post lyrics stat. I am mystified that I got anything at all in since my first one died.)

[Billy's Little Trip]

Round Zero is here for many reasons. One reason is to get use to delivering the song at the deadline.

Oh hey, good one.

Thank you!!!!!!
NUR EIN!!!!!!

I'll post my lyrics right nizow.

[Lunkhead]

BLT, up to his old shenanigans. Just like old times!

[dantes]

Please please please check your recording levels and your mix. Your guitar is clipping, resulting in unintentional distortion, and your vocals are wayy too low. I couldn't even hear the words.

Very rushed recording late at night so I couldn't really record vocals loudly, although I didn't mean them to be loud either. You can hear them fine with headphones on, with speakers it may be hard. Clipping leading to distortion was sort-of intentional to give some noise to the clean guitar.

[Manhattan Glutton]

Merisan would be my #1 choice; I could gush about how good this is, but I'll resist. Paco and WreckdoM after with the funny. BLT gets honorable mention.

[glenra]

DJ Ranger Den - Risk pays off. I really liked this.

Agreed!

Glen Raphael - Your song demonstrates that you've got a good ear for euphony and harmony - a trait that tends to be a good predictor for Nur Ein progress. The vocal doesn't match the rest of the recording, though; it sounds like the instruments were recorded in a studio, but the vocal was recorded with a cheap microphone. This is usually indicative of using music bed loops, which only get you so far. One last comment: for some reason it bugs me that the spoken-word portions are clearly being read by the same voice that does the singing. If this had been my song, I would have asked a friend to read that part, for sonic variety.

Yep. That was my first ever attempt to use GarageBand on an iPad. All the instrumental stuff was based on Apple's loops; the drums used their drum beat generator. The vocals were recorded on an iPad 1 using an iPhone headset mike - not a great place to start - and yeah, it kind of sucked. I had trouble getting the gain right; it kept clipping. For the spoken part I then used a filter that deliberately added distortion for a sort of "talking on the telephone" characteristic, in a nod to old instructional newsreels. But as for the earlier, sung part, I need to work on it and find a better process.

Worst case, next time I might have to assemble it with scratch vocals - the iPad workflow is really lovely - but then export to Mac and redo the vocals on a "real computer" using a "real microphone".

[Billy's Little Trip]

Just gave everything a first listen. Some awesome songs this year.

DJ, your song is ridiculous.
...fun lyrics, I like how you rhymed piranha and marijuana. I was thinking, hmm, what else can she rhyme with piranha....oh, there it is, lol. Aweshome

[JonPorobil]

Please please please check your recording levels and your mix. Your guitar is clipping, resulting in unintentional distortion, and your vocals are wayy too low. I couldn't even hear the words.

Very rushed recording late at night so I couldn't really record vocals loudly, although I didn't mean them to be loud either. You can hear them fine with headphones on, with speakers it may be hard. Clipping leading to distortion was sort-of intentional to give some noise to the clean guitar.

Well, you were going for the effect you were going for, I suppose. The inconsistency of that distortion (it only shows up when the guitar reaches a certain volume) makes it seem unintentional. Same with the vocals. So you didn't intend for them to be loud, fine, but were you going for inaudible? If so, then mission accomplished. I wonder, though, whether a song can be considered "educational" if the lyrics are unintelligible.

You will likely find more favorable reviews of your songs if you mix keeping in mind that people will be listening on a variety of different types of audio setups. It may sound fine on headphones, but you need to make sure that people listening on speakers (the majority of listeners, I'd bet) don't have an issue either.

[JonPorobil]

Glen Raphael - Your song demonstrates that you've got a good ear for euphony and harmony - a trait that tends to be a good predictor for Nur Ein progress. The vocal doesn't match the rest of the recording, though; it sounds like the instruments were recorded in a studio, but the vocal was recorded with a cheap microphone. This is usually indicative of using music bed loops, which only get you so far. One last comment: for some reason it bugs me that the spoken-word portions are clearly being read by the same voice that does the singing. If this had been my song, I would have asked a friend to read that part, for sonic variety.

Yep. That was my first ever attempt to use GarageBand on an iPad. All the instrumental stuff was based on Apple's loops; the drums used their drum beat generator. The vocals were recorded on an iPad 1 using an iPhone headset mike - not a great place to start - and yeah, it kind of sucked. I had trouble getting the gain right; it kept clipping. For the spoken part I then used a filter that deliberately added distortion for a sort of "talking on the telephone" characteristic, in a nod to old instructional newsreels. But as for the earlier, sung part, I need to work on it and find a better process.

Cool. Just for reference, I did catch the phone filter on the spoken-word vocals. The part that didn't rub me the right way was that the voice is obviously the same person.

In fact, I think I've figured out why that bugged me, too. If the filter was put there to evoke an old instructional video, then it sounds off that that instructional video happens to be narrated by the same voice that's singing me the song. That's why I say that for that part, I probably would have asked a friend.

We've got a Songfight chat room that you're welcome to join in if you need any incidental stuff like that, or if you just want to get to know us better and share your inevitable gripes about the challenges and/or judging process.

More info in this thread: http://songfight.net/forums/viewtopic.p ... 54#p158854

[Paco Del Stinko]

Glad yer in, BLT. Oh wait. Did I just say urine? NUR EIN!!!!!!

[Billy's Little Trip]

Glad yer in, BLT. Oh wait. Did I just say urine? NUR EIN!!!!!!

URINE!!!!!!!

[EmbersOfAutumn]

Glad yer in, BLT. Oh wait. Did I just say urine? NUR EIN!!!!!!

URINE!!!!!!!

Anagram - NUR EIN = N URINE

[dantes]

You will likely find more favorable reviews of your songs if you mix keeping in mind that people will be listening on a variety of different types of audio setups. It may sound fine on headphones, but you need to make sure that people listening on speakers (the majority of listeners, I'd bet) don't have an issue either.

Yes, but unfortunately I had to be very quiet while recording vocals (in the middle of the night, family asleep ...) so it was very quiet, I increased the volume as much as possible but I realize it's still too low for people listening through speakers.

[JonPorobil]

Part two of my reviews. Again: I AM NOT A JUDGE, so my opinions don't actually matter to the competition. Just sharing my (hopefully constructive) advice in keeping with the Songfight tradition.

Luke Henley - This is a very long song for something with no rhythmic variation and only two chords (wait, maybe a third snuck in there during the chorus?). I'm also not impressed by the over-the-top dramatic lyrics. Is the educational part supposed to be the part about the stain removal? I just don't know, if this were shorter, I'd probably just say "not my thing" and move on, but at nearly six minutes, this track is a chore.

Manhattan Glutton - Nobody I know is able to blend grunge and piano the way you do. It's an appealing combination, and this track combines that style with some catchy melody and great conservation of language. I'm not so sure about the description of the blood-clotting process as "educational," but I don't much care; I dig this song.

Merisan - My first thought - as quickly as it took me to realize this was a tango titled "First Blood" - was of Tom Lehrer's "The Masochism Tango." Obviously, not even remotely the mood you were going for. I'm not entirely sure how "first blood" relates to the subject matter of the song here. Blood as a metaphor for sex? I suppose it works, but I've never really heard it put that way, and it feels awkward. Anyway, what does work here is the instrumentation. I love the accordion plays against the stringed instrument (is that a ukelele or a flamenco guitar being played in the higher registers?), and the percussion is masterful. It all combines into a song that feels richly layered in spite of its minimalist arrangement.

Paco del Stinko - You came back. You put your game face on. You did your best impression of They Might Be Giants. You rocked. Hey, this is the first song in the "educational" challenge to actually teach me something I didn't know before! And it's catchy and upbeat and fun! And it's over before it gets a chance to wear out its welcome! This is great!

Pop Machine - Well, you certainly got the "educational" requirement out of the way, but I have to admit that a lot of this went right over my head, so I didn't really get much out of it. It's musically-executed well enough, and you had enough panache to know to add elements of musicality to the otherwise dry lyrics (in particular, I liked the "Frequency of T! Frequency of T!" part), but I don't think I'll remember much of anything about this track two or three weeks later.

Rabid Garfunkel - It's tough to get into the carnival barker/fight announcer vibe when you sound like you're stage-whispering into a microphone. Turn down the mic volume, take a couple of steps back, and really belt that mother out, man. Lyrically, I think I'm missing some prerequisite knowledge, so the words don't make a whole bunch of sense to me. I mean, I know it's about a swordfight, so, uh, cool, I guess. This sounds very much like Tom Waits, which I guess is no surprise, since this is Rabid Garfunkel we're talking about. Good effort.

Ross Durand - Interesting conundrum... can it be considered educational if it's based on fiction? I barely care about that, though, because this is just lovely. I love the buildup and climax. Look at that, just one guy and one guitar, without even having any repeating verses or chorus, and you've managed more dynamic range than anyone else who entered this week. Well done, Ross. I am duly impressed.

WreckdoM - Let's be charitable here: The quickly-read low-mixed informational factoids about the historical significance of the Rambo franchise (pretty much the bare minimum needed for the song to count as "educational") inserted into a song that glamorizes violence as much as Rambo III does is clearly a satire on American standards & practices. And I wouldn't expect anything less than the sharpest satire, coming from a band like WreckdoM. Glad to see you guys in again.

Worldly Self Assurance - This is playful, loopy, and unpredictable. I'm enjoying it quite a bit. Are these lyrics written by Pedro? It's kind of silly but also really engaging how the narrative intertwines with the elementary-school level math and science tidbits. Pushing the envelope on "educational," like many of the better songs in this round. Very good job.

Adam Adamant - Near the end, you mention a baseball bat, and then I remembered, "Oh yeah. He said he was going to write about Worms." Unfortunately, most of the lyrics didn't really drive it home. Maybe include some samples from the game to drive your point home? Many of the voice banks actually use the words "First Blood" in them. Did you ever hear "Worms" by the Frontalittle Squad? Glenn built the entire beat out of nothing but samples from the game, and Johnny Cashpoint gave us the immortal line "Worms, it's not a game, it's my life with better graphics!" Ah, fond memories. Anyways, Adam, your ukelele is badly out of tune, and it positively ruins this song.

Boffo Yux Dudes - A cute little song in a pleasant enough package, though I spent the whole song wondering "What does this have to do with the title?" and never got an answer. Near the end, a spoken-word voiceover kicks in and it's way too loud, knocking an otherwise competent mix off-balance. Moreover, I'm not sure what the purpose of that voice is for this song; it seems to be trying to inject a dose of overt jokery into a song that's already amusing enough in its own right. Ending the song on that note was an unfortunate way to go out, since it started off pretty strong.

[Manhattan Glutton]

I consider raising awareness of self-harm to be a noble educational goal, helping push my weak description of the healing process over the edge. Though I'll admit, it is clearly not Schoolhouse Rock. Thanks for the comments, amigo.

[Lunkhead]

Our song is about a woman with a vampire fetish. It's uke and bass, accordion, snaps for a creepy kooky vibe, shakers, tambo, cabasa, and of course vocals.

I think I most enjoyed the entries from frankie, TWSA, and WreckdoM.

[BoffoYux]

Thanks, Generic -

We had numerous issues, and those fly in parts had some fun integrating when I sent them to Al in Chicago. Gotta love making music across time zones.

The thought process behind the 'First Blood' was that autotrophs are basically clones of each other, and 'First Blood' relations. It wasn't spelled out that way.

If we had a few more passes at it, I think some of your technical concerns might have been addressed. As it was, we were just happy to have something entered on time.

Boffo Yux

[JonPorobil]

Our song is about a woman with a vampire fetish.

Well I sure feel dumb now.

Maybe you should had held off on the explanation for a little longer, just to see how long it would take me to figure it out.

[Ross]

Ross Durand - Interesting conundrum... can it be considered educational if it's based on fiction?

Well, it is educational for new vampires. Given that (a) it is round zero and (b) there Has been a generally permissive and trustful approach to challenge completion in past Nur Ein!s, i felt comfortable submitting this, although i was aware of the potential conundrum. I think the challenge as stated allows for fictional education.

Thanks for the review, I'm glad you liked the song.

Nur Ein

[dantes]

I consider raising awareness of self-harm to be a noble educational goal.

I agree. Seems we both picked the same subject.