The Song Fight Bulletin Board

Death Plunge, The Landfills
---

I know what you're goin' thru. These days they wear you down.
It seems an awful waste to leave you overflowing with doubt.
Unsure that you should quit. Not knowing why to go on.
You'd always thought to tell me, and I'd always said "you're wrong".

Now I'll help you. I'll help you find a way out.
A way out of this torture. A way to be free.

Another night spent on the phone, sitting listening to your sad pleadings.
Why don't you just leave me alone?
I wish you'd go ahead and take the plunge.


This thing that you do to me-- so selfish and so cruel.
Your empty threats so hollow only ring true to you.
I'm tired of being here, tired of being your confidant.
Thankless, heartless, helpless-- now I'll tell you what I want.

I want to help you. To help you on your way out.
A way out of your torture. Your torturing of me.

Another night trapped on the phone, sitting listening to your sad pleadings.
Why don't you just leave me alone?
I wish you'd go ahead and take the plunge.


Hey-- I know you're feeling down, but this is the last time we're doing this. I've got to be at work tomorrow, and you're not going to keep me up all night *again*. Look-- maybe you're right-- maybe suicide *is* the answer! All signs do seem to point that way. And, ya' know, I just can't take being your uncompensated therapist anymore. It's such an emotional drain.

Goodbye.

DEATH PLUNGE
Jonas Emmett


I see you walking
I should be talking
"Could we be rocking in another place?"

But I'm shakin
Altogether fakin
And I'm achin just to see your face

Then you'll be leavin
And I'll be grievin
I can see you datin Steven and I'm outta the race

I gathered my strength
I gathered my strength and willed myself
I took a leap of faith
I took a leap of faith and I killed myself

"Did it hurt when
You fell from heaven?"
Who am I kiddin, I can't even try

But you're a cutie
"Can I take you to a movie?"
Nope, I'm feelin woozy, I can't look in her eyes

Wish I was taller
Wish I was a baller
Wish I had a girl who looked good, I would call her
But I'd fall right over if she looked in my direction
Like a weapons inspector and I've nothing to impress her with, now!

If I could gather my strength
If I could gather my strength and will myself
I'd take a leap of faith
I'd take a leap of faith and I'd kill myself

OCTOTHORPE: Death Plunge
------------
There is a great corporation.
Octothorpe International Plumbing Conglomeration.

Many workers work there.
Assistant plumber Yueller, eighth class.

Handling the world and their plumbs.
But the substandardness is the cost.

Enforcing the mass hysteria.
Employees given reduced pressure zone devices.

[Begin Chorus]
Oh, how can the world be saved?
To Octothorpe we are enslaved.

Oral tradition in hydraulic plumbing.
It is foretold of the second coming.

The myth says that it fixes stuff.
Even tough clogs like marshmallow fluff.

It is the end of septic hunger.
It is the Mystical Death Plunger.
[End Chorus]

Carbonation backflow.
Octothorpe causes world strife.

Fighting the evil plight.
Pigeons gather into militarist cells.

Ancient legend gives answers to panic.
Finding a man eating a sandwich.

The magic item of holy throneness.
The mystical death plunger.

[Chorus]

Yueller takes up the challenging crusade.
Following a map that he made.

There are lawyers.
But we omit litigation.

After searching low in the manhole.
He discovers the device of amelioration.

Beginning his stomp of the evil plot.
The world cheers his onslaught.

[Chorus]

Yueller enters the water transit system.
He discovers the cleanest system around.

Copper pipes abound.
He uses rebar to repipe.

A Corporate bellow reverberates the building.
Permanently disabled Octothorpe strikes back.

His life is not for naught.
And the tradition lives on.

Team:Music
"death plunge"

(i don't wanna go
no i don't wanna go)

it's not a big surprise exactly what's happening
it's like you're flying through the air and you're flying
parabolic,
parabolic wave function of your body
and when you hit the top and start looking down
start looking down
and you start thinking about it
and you realize:
holy shit, i'm falling through the air
and i'm gonna hit that
way the hell down there
that brown thing rushing up at me
and that's when it
suddenly hits you
all of a sudden
you realize all these little things you could have done to make life better
place better
experience better
sort of
whoa shit the ground's coming right at you and
you're falling through the clouds and
well you know you won't actually make it
to the ground
(on a death plunge)

it's about as far as you can go
straight down
and you're landing
and you're landing
not on top of the ground but several inches beneath it
you hit with such impact
that a cloud flies into the sky
obscuring the sun
your chance of survival is practically nothing
technically
there's some chance of your surviving a death plunge
but it's a very small chance
it's such a small chance that statistically they say there's no chance whatsoever
(on a death plunge)

he pressed his face against the drab and dirty window
walking with poise and pride
eyes straying either to one side
or the other
i belong to myself
i belong to myself
several moments later
of silent deliberation
calm, clear and decisive
he sympathetically understood
and it continued to echo
for days afterwards
there was a glorious dawn
(on a death plunge).