The Song Fight Bulletin Board

By Ross Durand

I've seen you walk that walk - and I'm not impressed
I've hseen you talk that talk - and I'm not impressed
Yeah, I know where you go, and I know who you know
And I'm not impressed

I've seen how much you bet - but I'm not impressed
I saw your video on the net - but I'm not impressed
You swagger, you dismiss
You don't deserve a life like this
No I'm not impressed

I'm not impressed by the way you look down your nose at folks like me
If I wasn't here to carry your bags around
How glamorous would you be?

I've seen the way you tip - and I'm not impressed
Just wait until you slip - cause I'm not impressed
I know who comes and goes
I know what goes up your nose
And I'm not impressed

I've got the keys to your room - and I'm not impressed
New video comes out soon - and I'm not impressed
You think you've got it all - but I'm not impressed
The bigger they come, the harder they fall - and I'm not impressed

I’m Not Impressed
by Puce

The world is upside down,
Darwin is spinning in the ground,
You may be Number 1 but don’t say you’re the best,
Because I can’t tell you from all of the rest

Think how smart the average person is,
Well there’s three billion dumber than him,
They sunk this ship, the wreck is lost,
And now the trash all floats to the top

It all floats to the top,
It all floats to the top,
It all floats to the top,
It all floats to the top

If all you want is mediocre then turn up your radio
I’m not impressed
I’m not impressed
If all you want is mediocre then turn on your TV shows
I’m not impressed
I’m not impressed

*whistling*

The Nutwalls - I'm Not Impressed

You call me up at dinner time
You got me hangin on the line
I cut you off you try to stall
I put you on the do-not-call

Hello? Is Mr. Nutwall there?

I'm not impressed...
by your focus group or mortgage rates securities tax rebates
I'm not impressed...
long distance, club med, keep the starving children fed
I'm not impressed...
Measure N vote beggar, help elect Schwarzenegger.
I'm not impressed

Ahhhh now they're knocking on my door
Peddling a holy war
They say it's near I should repent
But my soul is clean my money's spent

These pamphlets will change your life...

I'm not impressed...
by your Watchtower, clambake, E-meter, golden plates
I'm not impressed...
I could never be a Mormon, like my coffee in the mornin'
I'm not impressed...
L. Ron Hubbard, Joeseph Smith, Jesus Christ it's all a myth
I'm not impressed

Ahhhhhhhh all these people
Tryin to sell me
Shit I don't need

Late at night with my TV
Bathed in mediocrity
I think about my next meal
Sell it to me, Ron Popeil

Act now for this one-time amazing offer...

I'm not impressed...
egg wave, Foreman grill, makin' bacon, weight loss pill
I'm not impressed...
theigh master, oxyclean, ab roller, wrinkle cream
I'm not impressed...
space bag, inflate-a-bed, a garden weasel for my shed
I'm not impressed...
Showtime oven, ginsu knives, only nineteen ninty-five
I'm not impressed...
Strips to keep my teeth white, Enzyte keeps me up at night
I'm not impressed...
Whiplash, car wrecked, a lawyer for my broken neck
I'm not impressed...
Sally Struthers, back to school, do you take me for a fool?
I'm not impressed.

Walking
Wearing
Food for 20 kids
Shiny
Smooth Lips
How much did you pay for (that dress)

Shananan
Shananaa

Im not impressed
No more no less
Im not impressed
Im not impressed
No more no less

You are
so smart
Youve got all the answers down
You can
turn my
smile to a...(frown)

Shanana
Shanana

CHORUS

Thanks for
the compliment
I feel so honored now
I think
I need a break
To stop the spinning, talking (cow)