The Song Fight Bulletin Board

Lots of time to mull over these songs waiting for a rescue here...

Lyrics thread:

viewtopic.php?f=5&t=11910

Tomdg - Love the energy here. I hope, politically, this is mostly a sarcastic viewpoint. But either way, a good song is a good song. It certainly doesn’t outstay its welcome. Great job.

Sweeney Toad - Damn, you really know how to take song ideas other places, to be sure. This is seriously dark, existential-crisis stuff. I guess this is where most of us are at this point. Really great.

The Pannacotta Army - Love the Jason Isbell vibe on this, if that’s not an insult. This is such a perfect arrangement, I absolutely detest you. Really great song. Grrr.

WreckdoM - Really like the mantra-like lyric/message here. The lyrics is great overall. You’re trying to hypnotize me into liking this. I think it’s working. Bastards!

Tim Hinkle - This is very Moody Blues, and I LOVE it. Again, I like where you take the idea here. Loneliness, but with the possibility of solving it. The guitar duel at the end is a particular treat.

Kamakura - You made me think of HIM, and I hate you for that. Having said that, this is a well-done concept, as sick to death as I am of hearing him talk.

Evermind - Being a bit of a misanthrope myself, this is my favorite lyric so far. You carry this off perfectly.

gizo - Love the vibe of this one. It’s like The Cure meets The Chills. The arrangement is really great. Could use a bit of bass guitar (or at least a bit more). Really like this overall.

Lichen Throat - OK, now this is like OMD meets Leonard Cohen. Another great arrangement. Really great lyric.

Balls To Monte - Way happier with this one as opposed to last week’s disaster. Bit of 10cc mixed with a pinch of Bay City Rollers. Shang-A-Lang!

Paco del Stinko - The great lost track from Ween’s The Mollusk. Your recordings always sound really great and balanced. I SO fucking hate you for that.

seemanski - Wow. Maybe my favorite so far. Really tight arrangement and great vocals. Damn. This may be the one. Got quite a few to choose from already.

Phlebia - This is the band that Depeche Commode [yeah, I know it’s a Dead Milkmen joke] COULD have been. Like DC with an injection of Kraftwerk after having had a vicious beating. What I mean to say is, I really like this a lot.

add - Impeccable, fantastic, synthesizer-licious! And it’s good too! But seriously, a typically fantastic job from one of the all-time greats, imo.

Brown Word and the Big Whine - I love the commitment here (I’m assuming there’s a RUSH-type thing going on here). I definitely need to listen to this a few more times. It’s THAT thick, and I don’t mean that in a bad way.


Wow. Once again, I'm left with a number of really good choices here. It's gonna be a tough decision.

Balls - I love classic power pop like this. Those high notes in the chorus are wonderful.

BW+BW - I don't listen to much prog or metal, so this is not my thing overall, but the rockout at 2:20 did grab me. I liked that momentary sense of losing control.

Evermind - I like the casual tone. The vocals and percussion nail that vibe.

Gizo - Great drum and lead guitar sounds. Actually a lot of good sounds in here, like that cello/mellotron thing. I like the line "On a black, black sea". The mp3 goes on for much longer though? I kept waiting for some ocean sound effects.

Kamakura - It's inspired to turn person woman man camera tv into a chant, though I wish that had gotten more intense. Feels like the whole song was building up to that.

Lichen Throat - Oh I like the low tones in your voice. Great synths. Mixwise, it might work better with a synth taking equal prominence with your vocal to strengthen the melody.

Paco - Grabs me right away with the arrangement and that amazing synth. The vocals aren't my thing as they are. Maybe some delay or something would accentuate the vocal play you're doing?

Pannacotta - Smoooth. This is very pretty, songwise and especially the production. Well, and the arrangement. And the performance.

Phlebia - Ah yes, the lo-fi goth I now know and love from the live stream. "Get in the life boat" is quite a hook you've got there. That'll rattle in my ears for a while.

seemanski - Foot-tapping from the start. Love that lick that happens after "I'm a whisper on the breeze".

Sweeney Toad - Sonically cool, and a good thematic fit between lyrics and texture.

Tim Hinkle - Nice percussion. The whole arrangement is great. My favorite part is the last transition from the chorus to the verse chords + solo.

Tomdg - Fun bit of bedroom punk. Drums are a bit too in the uncanny valley (though I'm probably not one to talk). Seems like the guitars are more the point anyway, and they're right on.

EDIT: Forgot WreckDom!

WreckDom: I like that bass line. Good atmosphere. "Water water everywhere but not a drop to drink" is a good line.

EDIT: Ken!

Ken - This sounds great, especially the guitars and vocals. The bridge could use a sonic change of some kind, but that's a quibble. Catchy chorus too. I saw seemanski's comment about Fountains of Wayne, and I agree.

Balls to Monte – This has a 70s glam-rock vibe. Reminds me of stuff like Sweet or Suzi Quatro. It’s even got that “da-dah, da-dah, da-dah...” Wizard thing that ABBA ripped off for Waterloo - if only there was some brass in the mix to complete the effect. Pretty nicely put together (some great vocals) and kind of catchy in parts. I like it - especially in a nostalgic way.
 
Evermind – Doesn’t sound like a great deal of effort was expended in the writing and recording. It’s fairly unimaginative and predictable. A simple song needs something like excellent lyrics or a good melody to carry it.
 
Seemanski – Love how this kicks off with the bright energetic strumming and passion that clearly comes over. Being really picky, I’d like the vocal tracks to be tighter and maybe the introduction of some basic percussion (handclaps? tambourine?) at the start of second verse would’ve been nice, but this is a very enjoyable brief folky gallop.

Brown Word and the Big Whine – Comes across as though the B-52’s are having a bash at some sort of brash metal. Vocally it’s shouty, melodramatic and theatrical, especially the title lines. Maybe just a genre bias thing but not particularly keen on this I'm afraid.

Tomdg – The intro has some promising energy but I was expecting more going into the meat of the song. The production is lightweight. I want some more thump and oomph in the bass and drums – both are weak and the vocals are overly dry – no reverb at all?
 
Lichen Throat – Sigh. I really wish you’d attempt something different vocally or try to inject some more spark/life. Having every note of that twangy, ersatz bass/guitar sustaining and overlapping isn't very pleasing, at least to my ear. In a mix that’s already coping with a lot of reverb, it doesn't help.
 
Wreckdom – There’s a lot of doubled up vocals this week - these are rather messy. The descending guitar arpeggio riff is okay but overall this is quite stop-starty and never really get’s going enough – one part racks up and then just dissolves when the next comes along. I’m kind of waiting for some big chorus or something to happen that never does.

Add – The lead synth patch is a bit off-the-shelf obvious and twee, but then again maybe that quasi-cheesy charm gives the song its likeability. I do dig the song along with your vocal style and those occasional well-placed harmonies. The outro is perhaps unnecessarily a touch on the long side.
 
Gizo – Abrupt intro. The verses are sluggish and the rhythm guitar is rather dreary but I quite like other parts such as the Mick Ronson-ish fuzzy guitar and breathy Ahs. The chorus is fuller and flows much better. The song fades out just before the 3 minute mark but we get a further 2 and half minutes of silence – is there a profound concept behind this or just an oversight?
 
Tim Hinkle – I like the 60s vibe and the production – it’s a bit lo-fi cinematic (spaghetti western-ish) with an exotica feel, especially the percussion. The distorted guitars weirdly resemble trumpets which adds to the Morricone impression. Sounds like there’s a Theremin type thing going on too. Pretty cool.
 
Kamakura – The beat and the vocal phrasing don’t work that well together for me. Not much in the way of music content apart from the throwaway organ ditty.  
 
Paco Del Stinko – Glad you did something a bit different musically – the backing vocals and the repeated synth motif are nice, though I’m not sure why you decided to ham up the vocals so much. I’d have preferred if you played it straighter.
 
Sweeney Toad – I wish there was a bit more dynamic range and inflection in your vocal delivery. It wouldn’t hurt to have some more in the music too, which I find rather gloomy and depressing.
 
Phlebia – Pretty muddy vibe what with the lo-fi-ness and delayed dub mix. Maybe if Bauhaus covered Rock the Kasbah with Casio percussion and synths it would sound a bit like this. Oddly, there's something about it I quite like.

Ken's Super-Duper Band & Stuff - The verses and chorus are catchy, neat and make for some very nice guitar led melodic pop, although something about the chorus vocal sounds a tad ahead of the beat.
While I appreciate you tried something different chordally, the middle eight feels awkward and also struggles to resolve naturally back into the song.

Hi all - so I'm pretty new to Logic still, and obviously made a terrible mistake. Sorry about that. I'm still used to some of the extra hand-holding that Garageband did for me.

I felt incredibly rushed throughout this entry, so I'm quite surprised about the positive feedback, especially considering some of the other crackers here (and I'm only half-way through listening!)

gizo wrote: ↑

Thu Sep 24, 2020 4:24 pm

Hi all - so I'm pretty new to Logic still, and obviously made a terrible mistake. Sorry about that. I'm still used to some of the extra hand-holding that Garageband did for me.

I felt incredibly rushed throughout this entry, so I'm quite surprised about the positive feedback, especially considering some of the other crackers here (and I'm only half-way through listening!)

Don't be silly. Your entry is freakin' amazing!

I was hoping for more stretching of those vocal ranges. There was a bit.

Lichen Throat - There's the characteristic deep voice. I enjoy the stories your lyrics tell (even if they are sad or horrific like this one). I like that this is paired down with lots of space.

WreckdoM - Things were a little different this time - it's just Geoff and me making all the sounds - with some creative consultation from King Colon. For not having a lot of time to put this together I think it turned out pretty good. I had this tune in my head several times since. I'm intrigued by these lyrics - who or what are "they"? Gives ya the willies don't it? Nothing too fancy here, instrumentation-wise, a little of this, a little of that. Did try out a new guitar sound and I feel it came out well.

add - Complimentary backing vocals, always good. Nice chord progressions, not your average. I like that synth in the chorus - what is it called, as in how do you describe that sound?

tomdg - Rockin'! "Living like the dick that I am" - good line. Short but not too short.

Sweeney Toad - Deep dark sound. I'm having trouble saying a lot about this; the mood reflects the ennui the lyrics describe.

Tim Hinkle - I'm a big fan of interesting percussion and this appeals in that regard. Semi-dramatic minor-key music - check. Cool ending. You have a good voice, and I see you taking advantage of the optinoal challenge.

Brown Word and the Big Whine - Expecting many to like this song is probably asking a lot. I feel pretty good about this effort, though would that my guitar chops were more up to snuff, and my pipes just aren't flexible enough to do all the things I wanted. It was physically challenging all the way around. If anything I hope you find it over-the-top. The lyrics are supposed to be ambiguous enough to either really be about a sinking ship situation or to apply metaphorically to this sort of suspended animation a lot of us find ourselves in over the past several months.

Evermind - No nonsense guy and guitar with spare percussion. Everything is mixed well and very clear. Misanthropic theme is a plus.

Phlebia - The opening tones border on violence. In fact I find this whole song to be ominous and a little bit transgressive, which is appropriate given the lyrical content. The vox are pretty clear overall though occasionally get buried.

Balls to Monte - This is pleasant, a toe-tapper. Great backing vox! The main voice can sing really well. Catchy chorus. The guitar tone is sublime man. That breakdown is just what the song needed.

The Pannacotta Army - Really nice guitar work. I've come to expect quality in your submissions and this does not disappoint. Nice ending.

gizo - Is this a fade-in? At first I thought it was going to be mixed really low. Nice tone on that guitar that come in and out on the verse and the oh-ohs sound cool. Oh, heh-heh, I thought this was going to be a long tune but turns out it ends long before the track.

Paco del Stinko - I dig that synth. Vocal range stretching - yes! As always, nice guitar and bass work.

Kamakura - Oh my, I've never heard that sample before. Cool a cappella. The synths seemed to promise just a bit more than was presented, but I'll take it.

seemanski - Right away great energy. I like your voice(s). Yeah, this is a toe-tapper, and you get a pretty decent sound out of that acoustic. I approve, was even singing along a little with the chorus by the end.

gizo wrote: ↑

Thu Sep 24, 2020 4:24 pm

Hi all - so I'm pretty new to Logic still, and obviously made a terrible mistake. Sorry about that.

No worries, I was just pulling your leg. I know it was just an oversight really and it’s of no matter.

the panna cotta army wrote: ↑

Fri Sep 25, 2020 12:15 am

gizo wrote: ↑

Thu Sep 24, 2020 4:24 pm

Hi all - so I'm pretty new to Logic still, and obviously made a terrible mistake. Sorry about that.

No worries, I was just pulling your leg. I know it was just an oversight really and it’s of no matter.

I had to laugh at this having done exactly the same thing myself last time!

wreckdomelle: Are those low gutterals you? This is dope and probably my favorite BW+BW tune yet. Please continue!

sleepysilverdoor wrote: ↑

Fri Sep 25, 2020 6:24 am

wreckdomelle: Are those low gutterals you? This is dope and probably my favorite BW+BW tune yet. Please continue!

Glad you liked it! Yup, it's all me except the drums, which are MIDI.

WreckdoMelle wrote: ↑

Fri Sep 25, 2020 7:57 am

sleepysilverdoor wrote: ↑

Fri Sep 25, 2020 6:24 am

wreckdomelle: Are those low gutterals you? This is dope and probably my favorite BW+BW tune yet. Please continue!

Glad you liked it! Yup, it's all me except the drums, which are MIDI.

SongFight needs more death growls.

Quick comments with and after my morning coffee, through stereo speakers. Pretty decent fight, with Panna Cotta the favorite to win, in my humble opinion. Ask for clarification where needed, I'll gladly provide.

add - Laid back but not lazy. The beat is somehow almost wrong to my ears, I don't understand why. Regardless, a pleasant chorus and warm vocals sell this easily, along with the tasty right amount synths. I like the blend of synth into guitar there, very nice.

Balls To Monte - Oh man, 70s AM radio. That's a good thing to me, a veteran of that time. I dig the progression and the lead vocal a lot, backing vocals are just right, mightn't of hurt to have thicker ones, but no complaint, really. Hooky and memorable, don't let anyone tell you it's too cheesy. If they do, call me and I'll be right over.

Brown Word and the Big Whine - Day-um! Gonzo rocking, love it. Excellent vocal workouts, you stretched in both directions. I think the arrangement loses a bit of focus or direction, but the changes are all good. The vocals occasionally bring Exene Cervenka to mind, yet not in a copy cat manner. Good rockin' work here.

Evermind - Are you related to ADD? Very enjoyable lyics, not always a fan of spoken word bits in songs, as guilty as I have been over the years, but that part doesn't overstay its welcome. The overlapping verse does and doesn't work for me. Maybe just a few select lines or something. A pleasant listen.

gizo - Interesting fade-in. I like the octave guitars after the verse lines, but maybe the backing vocals under them better although they are not as prominent. Might've reversed that in the mix. The chorus is pleasant and easy going, but the fade out bridge part at the end is great. I can see how that couldn't have been the "main feature" of the song, and the fade makes you want it all the more, but yeah, that's some groovy trip out goodness there.

Kamakura - The lyrics are spot on, sad that they are. If this was hookier,. melodically, it would grab you tighter, but the message is what it's all about. The samples are well used but man, it must have been hard to attach such revolting idiocy to something you created. I mean, art, yeah, I get it. But it's like taking a shit on the supper you just made. Sorry, couldn't help myself. I dig the message and the brevity of the tune is just right.

Lichen Throat - Life is so much better when you let your stuff breathe. This is evidence of the progress you've made in your tenure here. Somehow this remains mostly warm, despite the cold synth elements involved. The arrangement is good, as are the lyrics. Mix-wise, your voice sits better than in the past. The end feels a bit un finished, but good track all around. Please listen to old Flash In The Pan stuff for vocal inspiration, if you don't already.

Paco del Stinko - Yup. Almost didn't submit this one because of the lead vocal, but I liked the music enough to give it a pass. But it's short, I kept telling myself. No guitar solo, anyway!

The Pannacotta Army - Organic sounding, as always. Damn real singers and writers! This is lovely and doesn't venture too deep into corn to turn one off. I think of lifeboats as a bad necessity, but this is so full of hope and all, a pleasant direction. Well played instruments all around, balanced arrangement and mix. Contends for the win. Or else! Very, very, nice work here.

Phlebia - Oh! I can hear some G-Diffuser in here, now. Very late night headphone stuff, gonzo and just unsettling enough to make me squirm (pleasantly) just enough. Simple and effective, the nautical whiffs of accordion and jaunty interludes are just right. A good lesson, as well, on how to change verse/chorus/etc. on top of the same theme running underneath. Abrupt ending, but not a thumbs downer for me.

seemanski - This is nice and up'n'at'em. Great energy, right to point arrangement. Vocals could tighten up next time around, but where they go is right on. Guitars sound great, no need for a full band. Don't let the anti-G and G folks tell you otherwise. When this ends I want to hear more. Tighten this up without losing the feel, and it's out of the park.

Sweeney Toad - Something a bit off on the rhythm here, like the vocals and backing track don't go together at times. Very Lichen Throat tracks at times. I like the lyrics and only wish there was a bit of melody here. Still, the darkness is a seller for me, and it's very dark. Feels a bit undercooked, but keep the oven warm. (?)

Tim Hinkle - I think the lifeboat here is a camel. This has a desert-y feel more than oceanic. Not that it's "supposed" to feel nautical, or whatever. The melody lines are good, but I really dig the string sounds underneath them. And that gonzo solo is fantastic. Overall, I like the melancholy mood here very much, and the song does not overstay its welcome. Nice.

Tomdg - Oh man. I totally dig this. The opening riffage is the nuts, man. Makes me want to drive a car too fast. It's loose, too, but doesn't fall apart. Almost, at times, but those nuts and bolts hold tight. Could've gone another round, and still kept it short, but great fun while it lasts. I am interpreting the lyrics as sarcastic commentary, but if not, I'll glady punch you in the face with my big commie fist. No, seriously.

WreckdoM - A bit too mumbly for my hard to understand vocals ears, and surprisingly straight forward from you guys. Still, a good vibe, easy going rock. Sounds like what you guys make before the coffee and et-ceteras kick in. Still, always love me some WreckdoM.

Paco Del Stinko wrote: ↑

Fri Sep 25, 2020 9:26 am

add - Laid back but not lazy. The beat is somehow almost wrong to my ears, I don't understand why. Regardless, a pleasant chorus and warm vocals sell this easily, along with the tasty right amount synths. I like the blend of synth into guitar there, very nice.

I'm interested if others heard the same thing with the beat. I tried something new and recorded midi from my electronic drums. I'm not a good drummer, so I quantized it. I wonder if I tried some off things in the beat or if maybe I quantized away the feel.

the panna cotta army wrote: ↑

Thu Sep 24, 2020 12:51 pm

Evermind – Doesn’t sound like a great deal of effort was expended in the writing and recording. It’s fairly unimaginative and predictable. A simple song needs something like excellent lyrics or a good melody to carry it.

Surprisingly, I did actually put a lot of thought into the writing. I started out by thinking what it would be like to be adrift in a life boat, with nothing to do but wait to be rescued or die of dehydration / starvation. I initially was going to make something directly addressing that panic and dread, but thought it would be where everyone else would likely go with their songs.

I thought that a short, catchy "drinking song" would be good. I wanted to make something that could be performed with only a guitar, and by drunk people, and so I kept it simple and short intentionally, with stomps, claps, and finger snaps as percussion (with tambourine, eventually, because it needed slightly more). "Folk" instruments were a must.

I couldn't make a drinking song about panicking about facing a high likelihood of slow death, so I chose to find some other topic, and since I've been reading a lot of philosophy lately, I took inspiration from existentialism, especially Sartre's idea that hell is other people, and that even worse than waiting to die (as we all are, really) is being stuck with an asshole for the experience. Furthering the philosophy theme, I snuck in a quote from The Trouble With Being Born, from pessimist philosopher Emil Cioran, as a spoken word section (largely because I couldn't find a great way to sing the quote).

The lyrics attempt to (a) follow a similar cadence to the title as to make it a better drinking song and (b) start each line with an -ing word:

Sitting in the life boat
Waiting for a rescue
Wondering if help will ever come

Thinking that the worst part is
Being with a smug and
Condescending jerkwad like you

I iterated on the lyrics a lot before finalizing (and even then, my kid was around when I did a last-minute recording, so I swapped "jerkwad" for "dickhead".

As for effort expended in recording? Yeah, I definitely phoned that one in. I started recording after the deadline, so it was a bit rushed, but I felt like I got some solid takes, and it didn't take a lot of effort for a short, simple song.

Thanks for the review!

Ken's Super Duper Band 'n Stuff has been added to the fight.

Lunkhead wrote: ↑

Fri Sep 25, 2020 2:35 pm

Ken's Super Duper Band 'n Stuff has been added to the fight.

Ken's Super Duper Band 'n Stuff has been added to my reviews

Add - Lovely tune. I'm not completely sure you have chosen the right synth sound,though; this one is making me giggly. The ending seems a little rough.

Balls to Monte - This is my favorite of the fight. An excellent bit of glam rock. Reminding me of Sparks.

Brown Word and the Big Whine - Your vocal performance on this is fantastic. This song is a lot of fun to listen to.

Evermind - This is delightful. The tone you have on the spoken word portion is perfect. The final "condescending jerkwad like you" feels like too many words. Maybe cut the "wad"?

gizo - I'm partial to a fade in opening. Nice "oh-oh"s. Great ending with the repeated "On the black, black sea." This is really nice.

Kamakura - I'm not into this. I think the samples have to do too much heavy lifting. If this were catchier the basic idea might work for me. It has inspired me to create my own appalling little something: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1gAOxku ... sp=sharing (Hopefully Starfinger won't mind...)

Ken's Super Duper Band 'n Stuff - Glad this got added in. Fantastic! Had me singing along like it was an old favorite half way through my first listen.

Lichen Throat - I really like the instrumentation on this. Your vocals work for me on the section corresponding to the first 8 lines on each stanza of the posted lyrics. I'd like to hear something different on those last four lines of the stanza, though.

Paco del Stinko - This is a great song. Your performance is wonderfully over the top.

The Pannacotta Army - This is quite beautiful. I put it near the top on my first listen through, but it's a bit low energy for me this time. Oooo, I love the instrumental section. Solid ending.

Phlebia - Not feeling this one. The vocal gives me the impression of someone speaking over an intercom system, perhaps one installed on a submarine. It's interesting for a while. For some reason I really like the line "Getting on my coat."

see-man-ski - I like this sort of thing and you're doing it well.

Sweeney Toad - On my first pass through the songs I wrote, "This is what I feel like right now" on this one. I think this really has captured a relatable emotional state effectively. I don't really enjoy listening to it, though.

tomdg - After I played the songs the first time, I couldn't remember hearing this one. OK, this is pretty good. I like the energy. It doesn't leave an impression, but it's nice enough while it's on.

WreckdoM - This is really pleasant for a WreckdoM song. Catchy even. "Water water everywhere but not a drop to drink." Good song to play at a wedding. Or maybe just outside one.

Tim Hinkle [me] - This feels like me carrying on doing what I do; meanwhile, I'm hoping I'll surprise myself and do something new. I think it's probably all right.

the panna cotta army wrote: ↑

Thu Sep 24, 2020 12:51 pm

Sounds like there’s a Theremin type thing going on too.

That's just my backing vocal. Not even running it through my kazoo. There is a touch of reverb on it.

gramparsons wrote: ↑

Thu Sep 24, 2020 8:34 am

This is very Moody Blues

That's the combination of Mellotron and falsetto backing vocals. The Moodies are pretty prominent in my musical DNA.

neutronflow wrote: ↑

Sun Sep 27, 2020 5:12 pm

That's the combination of Mellotron and falsetto backing vocals. The Moodies are pretty prominent in my musical DNA.

I love The Moodies. And thanks for the Sparks comment. You can't get better than that, in my opinion.

neutronflow wrote: ↑

Sun Sep 27, 2020 5:12 pm

Kamakura - I'm not into this. I think the samples have to do too much heavy lifting. If this were catchier the basic idea might work for me. It has inspired me to create my own appalling little something: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1gAOxku ... sp=sharing (Hopefully Starfinger won't mind...)

Your 'appalling little something' is bloody marvellous and should be required listening!