Having sex with a couch (Sad Life reviews)

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erik
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Having sex with a couch (Sad Life reviews)

Post by erik »

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Last edited by erik on Thu Jun 23, 2005 11:57 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Bjam
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Post by Bjam »

Ooh, TinyFight. No excuses for the people who don't review :D

Bjam: Me! The guitar's too low this week, and too out of tune also. One week I'll get it right.

The Nutwalls: Nice, interesting lyrics, please, ahem, post them. The little guitar solo is pleasant also. Ultimately a cute tune, just a little repetitive. But then it's a 2 minute song.

Dirk Sharkson: Good, although it's very... I dunno. Safe? Safe I think is what I'm thinking of. It got kinda boring toward the end. Nothing massively special, but still pretty good.

Ryan Rickenbach(Front page says Ryan Richenbach): A fun song, the stop/start guitar gets boring pretty quickly, but it's all good. Man, this sounds like a male me. But better. Frightening.

Wow, no one really sucked this week.
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Per Bjam's request

Post by Fusty Nut »

Bjam,

Thanks for the feedback! I posted the lyrics of the song. :-)
Anne
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Post by jack »

bjam
guitar needs tuning but the singing's ok. if you'd multitracked it, it would be better. pretty decent arrangement, but it could really use more (percussion, harmonies) to the mix.

ryan rickenbach
well, you multitracked it but it could still use more in the mix. like it really picks up my interest when you doubled the vox. the panning on the acoustics works pretty good. singing's good and done with passion so points for that too. it's a little too ren-festival for my taste, if you'd Tulled it up a bit more, it would be killer.

d. sharkson
hehe, three fourths of the way in and not an electric guitar in sight (ok, so you're playing some killer bass here...). that bass is absolutely wicked infectious and tight and really carries the tune. and the low passed chorus vox is a cool idea too, maybe a bit cliched and predictable, but it works for me. i really like this tune. lots of good dynamics and a very solid mix. great guitar playing too.

the nutwalls
the mix is a bit uneven, and the singing isn't doing much for me, but there's some nice stuff here. claves are always good. i liked the gratuitous guitar solo. :)

d. sharkson......welcome to songfight. you get my vote.
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Post by asshat »

bjam's got the best song hands down.

wtf is with ryan rickenbach in three fights? lame.
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Post by Nut #2 »

It's a Sad Life when there's only 4 competitors.. Oy!

bjam

I like your voice. It sounds like there may be a personal story in
this song, you seem to projecting some emotion. I shouldn't really be
one to comment on vocals, but it did feel to me like some of the
lines were rushed to fit a vocal meter. I think a more legato approach
to the vocal rhythm might have made this stand out more. Also,
both the guitar line and the vocal line are staying in a very narrow
pitch band, which I think makes the sound kinda monotonous. The
guitar line is well played, I didn't hear too much out-of-tuneness, but
Jack's comment about multitracking it is true. Adding some additional
instruments and going stereo would be helpful. For "gal+guitar" on
limited (presuming you don't have multitrack available) equipment, this
is a very good effort.


ryan

Man, I love this kind of "medieval" vocal melody. I've definitely got
to claim genre bias here, I love these kinds of sort of fantasy related
tunes. I wish the lyrics were more engaging, but I gotta tell you though,
"the torture of her strife" makes me cringe. I wish you had expanded
more on why she was in strife, and told a story instead of repeating
the same stuff. Technically, I felt the guitar was a bit dull sounding,
really could have used something more, a counterpoint line, mandolin
or similar, or perhaps even new strings on the guitar to make it a
little brighter. The changes between the fast/slow bits seemed a little
awkward. Dropping in an arpeggiation returning from the fast to the slow
bit would have evened it out a lot for me. All in all, a good tune,
just wish it was more interesting lyrically. The fact that you submitted to all three fights blows it for me. As good as this song is, you lost my vote by doing that. Pick a theme and stick with it.

d. sharkson

*chuckle* there's always gotta be one super-produced guy in a fight.
All in all, this is radio quality, production and sound wise. That
is a very cool bass line, and you have a great voice. I like the
vocal effect on the chorus. I'm feeling like I'm being crushed under
a thousand cymbals, though. The bass riff around 2:28 is HUGE. If
this had gone somewhere, like, built up to a bridge and then exploded,
it would have been great, but as it is, I got bored of it.
I also can't really understand a bunch of the lyrics, so I can't
really comment on that. All in all it's a good effort. Wish you'd
spent more time with the songwriting than with the production.

nutwalls

us.. had to switch gears late in the game, what can I say.
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Post by Father Bingo »

Dear Nutwalls,

My LiveJournal is now "Friends Only." Thank you for the reality check. I am so ashamed.

signed,
zombieluvr@livejournal.com
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Post by Ryan Rickenbach »

Nut #2 wrote: The fact that you submitted to all three fights blows it for me. As good as this song is, you lost my vote by doing that. Pick a theme and stick with it.
Vote how you like, but I don't understand how entering 3 songs makes this song any worse. It still would have been the same if I didn't enter 3. I would appreciate it if you would cast your vote based on the song quality, not quantity. But whatever, maybe it's just me.
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Post by turtlehead »

Bjam wrote:Ooh, TinyFight. No excuses for the people who don't review :D
I didn't realize this. I didn't even know what POST ON BOARDS! really meant actually. I think I understand.
Thank you very much Jack "the Finger". Makes for a very happy shark.

- Dirk
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Post by j$ »

The Nutwalls - The relentless sticks / click track takes the funkiness right out of the music. That was a mistake. This could easily have been much better without its rigidity. The mix is a little dry / thin. Nice overall but the list lyric seems a bit arbitrary - like a long list of things that you don't like. Overall cute ditty but not really crying out to me to be listened to again, a shame.

Dirk Sharkson - Good production, obviously. Telephone filter is cool and well used. A minute in I am waiting for a hook, though. two minutes in I'm getting slightly bored with the overall emo / prog arrangement of it. I think it's because the melody seems to revolve around a very limited number of notes, in different order between the verse and chorus? Spanish breakdown and mumbling is cool also. Yes, overall a good tune, but not hooky enough for me.

Ryan Rickenbach - Scarborough Fair-esque folk doesn't really do it for me personally. 'her eyes are like pendulums' sounds silly with this poxy 'I am a folk singer' delivery. No, i don't like this one very much (apart from the doubling speed in the chorus - that's cool).

Bjam - The la la las come in too early - the first bit could have been an instrumental break. Stumbly and clumsy at times, but sweet tune. 'Sad life' sounds like 'Satellite' at times. Good though. It feels honest in its aching confusion.

Oh, that's hard one, four good songs but no great ones, imo. I'm voting for Bjam if I remember.
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Post by j$ »

Ryan Rickenbach wrote:I don't understand how entering 3 songs makes this song any worse.
The thinking as I understand it is "not entering 3 songs would have made the one you did enter better". Also flagrant ignoring of the protocol (and the request in the FAQ to enter only one song) tends to piss some people off. Myself included.

My rule for multi-entries (oo-er) is I will listen and review all three as fairly as i can, but you won't get a vote from me for any of them.

j$
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Post by asshat »

Ryan Rickenbach wrote:
Nut #2 wrote: The fact that you submitted to all three fights blows it for me. As good as this song is, you lost my vote by doing that. Pick a theme and stick with it.
Vote how you like, but I don't understand how entering 3 songs makes this song any worse. It still would have been the same if I didn't enter 3. I would appreciate it if you would cast your vote based on the song quality, not quantity. But whatever, maybe it's just me.
you're wasting the time of the people who try to review all the fights. maybe if you spent more time on one song, you'd end up with a song worth voting for.
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Post by Dan-O from Five-O »

<b>Bjam:</b> The guitar is out of tune, a mortal sin for a girl and guitar song because there’s nothing there to really cover it up, except your voice. And though your voice does make up for a lot, the out of tune guitar is hard to get past. Your vocals are in the mix better than last week, (there are some noticeable pops in the vocals though) and I like the story that you’re telling. I hate to quibble over lyrics, but Ruby Red Glasses are pretty much the same to me as Rose Colored Glasses. My point is, someone wearing Rose Colored Glasses couldn’t see through the character’s facade, and wouldn’t have noticed the sad life lying beneath. A minor flaw, but one I thought important enough to point out. Don’t hate me. The rest of the style of your writing is pretty cool, it’s like you have some aversion to rhyming. I wish I did that more instead of feeling like every verse had to rhyme. Overall, the story is the best part for me, a sad life indeed. It kind of reminds me of mine. I’m going to go cry now.

<b> EDIT:</b> I’ve read the lyrics and listened to this a couple more times. By “Finally saw you through My ruby red glasses” do you mean in a despite them kind of way? If so then this makes sense to me more than it did before. Either way, I'm still going to cry over my sad life now.

<b>D. Sharkson:</b> OK back from therapy and on to finishing reviews. Umm, the mix is a little hot. OK, it’s distorted man. They put those red overload lights at the end of the meter there for a reason. You need to use them. It’s hard to tell if the problem was on the front end (while recording) or the back end (during mixing) or while converting it to MP3. Whatever the reason, find it and fix it. When you do that, lose the unnecessary part at the beginning. The good news is this is a pretty good song from what I can tell through all the distortion. I read the lyrics (because I couldn’t hear them, you know, distortion) and I liked them. The story is kind of familiar, I’ve been there, hurting so bad I couldn’t get up. I wouldn’t call it being a couch potato though, that just conjures up laziness. Your story just seems like more of someone who doesn’t have the will or desire to do anything because of the hurt they feel. That’s not pathetic, it’s a real and debilitating state of mind, and it deserves pity and not disdain.


<b>Ryan Rickenbach:</b> Maybe my speakers got blown on the last song, but I’m hearing distortion on this as well at points. This has a 60’s folk kind of quality to it, I can’t tell if I like it or not. It doesn’t make me feel like John Belushi in “Animal House” where I would grab the guitar out of your hands and smash it against the wall or anything, so you’ve got that going for you. It is close though, I would probably just walk away. As it is, I did that and came back for a couple of more listens. The more I listen, the more I’m getting a much older feel out this, like Renaissance or even Middle Ages kind of old, which is drawing more annoyance then the first listen. The repeating lyrics are bothering me more and more each time I hear their redundancy. I actually started out liking this song more than this review would suggest, but repeated listens have justified my negativity to me at least.


<b>The Nutwalls:</b> Musically, the tune is kind of catchy despite being predictable in it’s changes. I like the instrumentation, sounds like you could be singing this sitting around the campfire. Lyrically, the story is not very compelling to me. It just kind of comes across as bitching about people that bug you. You need to turn that watchful eye at yourself a little bit. Maybe people don’t want to hear about the stuff you write or read on Blogs, or your disenchantment with Everquest or the fact that you don’t like GWAR. Well those last 2 are kind of dead on especially the GWAR thing, but don’t gripe about Blogs man. I’m kidding mostly, but I hope you see that my main point is people don’t like people who bitch a lot. And bitching about people who annoy you is probably just as annoying as my bitching about someone bitching about people who annoy them. See what I mean?

Overall, this “Short Life” short fight was kind of a letdown for me. It wasn’t as strong as I thought it might be, but it wasn’t all bad either. I liked Sharkson (despite the technical difficulties) and Bjam the best. The rest were not as bad of a filler as my reviews read like they are.
jb wrote:Dan-O has a point.
JB
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Post by turtlehead »

Dan-O from Five-O wrote:D. Sharkson...it’s distorted...
I'm wondering if there's a setting on your media player that's causing the distortion. There's no distortion or technical difficulty with the recording, on the initial tracks or on the mixing and mastering. It's clean, given there are loud cymbals, and pumpin' bass.
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Post by Mogosagatai »

asshat wrote:maybe if you spent more time on one song, you'd end up with a song worth voting for.
Yeah maybe, and maybe not. Or maybe you'll end up with three songs worth voting for.
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Post by j$ »

"To maximize Song Fight's resources for everyone who wants to participate, please limit your entries to one song per week." (FAQ)
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Post by Noise Brigade »

Bjam I like this song alot. Your voice is perfect for what your doing. The guitar is preformed fine but needs to be brought up alittle bit in the mix. More presense, you know? Very well written

D. Sharkson The lyrics are good and the guitar fits perfectly to everything else that is going on in the song. The vocals effects are pretty cool. The spoken part is interesting and i'd like to hear it but i can't but i think that's kind of what you were going for.

The Nutwalls HA! This is a funny little song. the lyrics, I think, kept it moving. With any other lyrics this song wouldn't be quite the same. I love how it's more upbeat than the other entries but there is still alittle something missing in your song. I can't quite figure it out, it just sounds a bit hollow. But still, congrats, I loved it

Ryan Rickenbach There are many creative ideas in this song. The stoptime part is very well written but may not be appropriate where it is. Your voice fits the music but it's out of tune at times. The time changes are alittle shakey but i still like them. Overall a pretty good song...
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Post by Dan-O from Five-O »

turtlehead wrote:
Dan-O from Five-O wrote:D. Sharkson...it’s distorted...
I'm wondering if there's a setting on your media player that's causing the distortion. There's no distortion or technical difficulty with the recording, on the initial tracks or on the mixing and mastering. It's clean, given there are loud cymbals, and pumpin' bass.
I'll have to go back and listen to this and check my settings on Winamp, because I can see the other reviews are praising the mix.
jb wrote:Dan-O has a point.
JB
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Post by turtlehead »

Yeah man I did some more checkin on my tune and it's got a peak of 0.01 which is a bit too hot but there shouldn't be any distortion, just a quick clip at one point I think when the tune first comes in...and the begining stuff was unnecessary but, uh, I like to play ;)

-- Dirk
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Post by EightLeggedOedipus »

<b>Bjam</b>
--- This doesn't grab me like last week's did. Maybe I'll read the lyrics ---
/// I don't quite catch the story to it, and I'm not sure what "ruby red glasses" means unless you were "seeing red" and discovered the truth that perspective. Either way, this song confuses me in a disinterested kind of way. ///

<b>D. Sharkson</b>
+++ Nice groove to it. 99% of the time I put a minus sign next to "talkover," but here you made it distorted enough and low enough that's just a background noise in the jamout. +++
--- I do hear a bit of clipping, your 1 beats are all really punchy. You could have used a tasteful limiter in there. And the chorus ought to be belted out. ---

<b>Ryan Rickenbach</b>
--- This is "blah." The affected singing is grating and pretentious. Those mannerisms should be reserved for pompous indulgent lush glam orchestrations ---
/// The chord progression is ok ///
+++ The backing vocals lead in to the chorus. Nice touch. +++

<b>The Nutwalls</b>
+++ OMG you make me nostalgic for this song i wrote in high school about this girl who had a crush on me and dressed like a bee and wouldn't shut up. I remember it went something like "I'm not concerned about your drinking binge, don't wanna hear about your yeast infection." This song here is way better than mine was. +++
--- The way "sad fat guy dot com" comes out doesn't flow right. This would've been the perfect opportunity to bust out the Marshall Staxx and rock some fucking grindcore for about 5 or 6 seconds. The solo starts out in the wrong key (or a bad mode). Intonation ---

D SHark Turtle with the easy win.
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Post by Dan-O from Five-O »

turtlehead wrote:
Dan-O from Five-O wrote:D. Sharkson...it’s distorted...
I'm wondering if there's a setting on your media player that's causing the distortion. There's no distortion or technical difficulty with the recording, on the initial tracks or on the mixing and mastering. It's clean, given there are loud cymbals, and pumpin' bass.
OK, I replayed this after resetting all the volume levels on my computer (kids, what are you gonna do?) and it does sound much better. I still have some issues with the mix, but not as much as the other night. I do like the song much better now, and I think it's probably the hands down winner here.
jb wrote:Dan-O has a point.
JB
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Post by Caravan Ray »

Bjam: This is excellent. Good song and your voice sounds great. Sure the guitar could sound better – but that doesn’t really bother me. Well done

D. Sharkson: Nothing wrong with the song or performance – just doesn’t appeal to me at all. Sorry.

The Nutwalls: Good song. Arrangement doesn’t really work for me. I think you could have gone simpler – say just guitar and handclaps – or grungier and it would have worked better. Still – pretty good effort.

Ryan Rickenbach: Why are her eyes like pendulums? Have they come dislodged from their sockets? It sounds like you’re a 50 year old man with a beard and skivvy. Well performed – but it makes me want to vomit.

Vote for Bjam.
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