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It's a title AND a review! (Couldn't Have Been Worse)

Posted: Wed Mar 07, 2007 12:30 pm
by Albatross
And a floor wax! And a dessert topping!

Posted: Wed Mar 07, 2007 10:32 pm
by Ross
And a new product from Hillshire Farms!

Oh, wait. That was Couldn't Have Been Wurst.

Posted: Thu Mar 08, 2007 11:46 am
by MintyHandy
Couldn't Have Been Wurst
Wow. that Could Have Been Better.

Oh, wait, I mean Could Have Been Butter. Another fine Hillshire Farms product.

I pimp them in threads, they send me cheezy beefs

Posted: Thu Mar 08, 2007 5:02 pm
by Dave - so dark...
MintyHandy wrote: Oh, wait, I mean Could Have Been Butter.
Could have been butter? what was it really? .... several things come to mind.

I wish it had just been butter. >_>

Posted: Thu Mar 08, 2007 5:56 pm
by Billy's Little Trip
Holy crap Batman, we have 31 bands in this one! Can I get a WhOoP wHoOp?:mrgreen:

Posted: Thu Mar 08, 2007 6:25 pm
by The Anchors
I just had a quick listen and the only one that really stood out (because of its sheer rawkitude) was ShoutPounder. Reviews later.

Posted: Thu Mar 08, 2007 6:50 pm
by bz£
Incidentally, there are several worse Tarot cards than Death, which is generally interpreted to indicate some large-scale life change (not necessarily for the worse) than a literal "death". Ten of Swords looks gruesome but I'd go with the Nine instead if you're looking for utter despair. And, really, aren't we all?

Posted: Thu Mar 08, 2007 6:58 pm
by Devil Tongue
The Anchors wrote:ShoutPounder.
Thanks, dude. Thanks.

But it's ShotPounder. Not ShoutPounder. Who would pound a shout when they could pound a shot? Who?

Posted: Thu Mar 08, 2007 7:03 pm
by Denyer
Devil Tongue wrote:
The Anchors wrote:ShoutPounder.
Thanks, dude. Thanks.

But it's ShotPounder. Not ShoutPounder. Who would pound a shout when they could pound a shot? Who?
A shout could contain many shots.

Posted: Thu Mar 08, 2007 7:09 pm
by The Anchors
Devil Tongue wrote:But it's ShotPounder. Not ShoutPounder
Damnz, my bad.

Posted: Thu Mar 08, 2007 7:09 pm
by Billy's Little Trip
Yep, Shot Pounder is kick'n ass for sure. Also, for rawktitude, Klownhole is the light shiztastic. I'ma digg'n me some KH this week.

In the softer rock, Ross Durand, Caravan Ray, Saint Cale, The BeWells, all kick'n my mellow side.

Alternativenessismz, Hell Yeahs, Melvin, Anchores, Closest Dark Vepun ind.....by the way, is this Spin and the Durand's?

The "what the efff" award goes to Eddie Lance, lol. Very cool!

I'm still listening, so more to come. I'm so excited *does the Howard Dean scream*

Posted: Thu Mar 08, 2007 7:21 pm
by DJ Big Dick
OFFICIAL BIG DICKED REVIEWS

Fine Tuvan Dining - Meh. Really boring acoustic songs. :cry:
On the big dick scale this rates about an asian.

signboy - I only listened to half. The first 5 seconds were cool. Went downhill from there. Actually, it went further than downhill, it fell of a fucking cliff. This rates a very small dick.

PiGPEN - The drumming and synths are pretty cool, the singing is bad though. Doesn't go anywhere either. Small dick as well.

Darkest Daves - nice syths. You really want to be Depeche Mode though, don't you? A mildly sized dick.

DJ Big Fanny - :!: :!: :!:
:!:

Superteen - Really boring, everything about it is boring. And bad. This gets an asian dick.

c hack - see above

Billy's Little Trip - Awesome riff. Nice drumming. Singing starts off okay, but the hook is kind of a letdown. Medium dick

Caravan Ray - :?:

DooRite + Rankenstein - IT'S 2007 AND PEOPLE ARE STILL MAKING NERD RAP? UGHH! This song doesn't even have a dick. Really bad production and rapping. That is all.

Ross Durand - Would've been cool if Walker hadn't already used this for his theme song.

Shoehorn TC - More acoustic stuff. Bleh.

Dangerous Croutons - Could've been good if not for the vocals.

Flvxxxvm Florvm - The first 5 seconds reminds me of the intro to Family Matters. That's all I listened to.

MC Eric B - Really really really really really bad. I found DooRite's song's dick. It was in this song's mouth.

Shael Riley - Starts off pretty cool. The singing, as it is with most of the songs is pretty poor though. Small dick.


The Anchors - Starts off nice. Nice drumming. The singing in the hook sounds kind of awkward. Starts to stretch around 5/9ths of the way through, but ends well. A medium large dick.

Klownhole - Nice riff. Too long though and the jokey singing kind of ruins it. A medium small dick.

Shotpounder - Finally a song that isn't ruined by the vocals. The megaphone effect isn't my favorite though and sounds kind of out of place alongside everything. Still one of the better songs. A medium/large dick.

Phil's First Tambourine - Embarrassing.

mico saudad- boring. radio rock esque lyrics. yawn.

Carpetburn - Ugh. Singing is really bad. Music isn't the worst though. But the singing...ugh.

Saint cale- Pretty boring. Singing is okay, some people will like it.

Hell yeahs - Power pop with a female singer is the second worst genre on earth (Ska is the first, fyi). That's all I need to say.

5900-N5 - Starts off cool. The vocals though...ugh

Hoosier daddy - Sound like a song I'd hear at the beginning of some new ABC comedy. Plus you have the worst songfight name since The eclectic sp00ns last submitted a song.

The BeWells - Boring, but it's got high production quality and I'm sure some people will like it.

Masterhyde - I'm not sure what to make of this. the beat is really amateurish. The rapping is quite boring and you've got really no charisma to make up for your lack of energy.

Closest Dark Vepun ind - Starts off sounding like the "Jazz" ringtone on my Motorola phone. Goes downhill from there.

DJ Big Dick would vote for ShotPounder. But he voted for himself instead.

Posted: Thu Mar 08, 2007 7:23 pm
by Devil Tongue
Billy's Little Trip wrote:Yep, Shot Pounder is kick'n ass for sure.
Thanks, dude. Really. But, seriously, it's ShotPounder, no space.

Why would you want a space between your shot and your pounder?

Why?

Posted: Thu Mar 08, 2007 7:28 pm
by DJ Big Dick
Quiet down Shoot Painter.

Posted: Thu Mar 08, 2007 7:34 pm
by Billy's Little Trip
Devil Tongue wrote:
Billy's Little Trip wrote:Yep, Shot Pounder is kick'n ass for sure.
Thanks, dude. Really. But, seriously, it's ShotPounder, no space.

Why would you want a space between your shot and your pounder?

Why?
Well ShortRounder, muh hootchy likes a little space before my shot when I pounder. :wink:

Posted: Thu Mar 08, 2007 7:46 pm
by Adam!
Holy crap Csehack's back! Where ya bin, buddy?

DJ Big Dick

Posted: Thu Mar 08, 2007 7:46 pm
by MC Eric B
DJ Big Dick - I have to say your reviews made me laugh out loud (not the review of my song of course, which you trashed). Reminds me of the 2 grumpy guys (Statler & Waldorf) in the balcony on The Muppet Show.

- MC Eric B

Re: DJ Big Dick

Posted: Thu Mar 08, 2007 7:58 pm
by DJ Big Dick
impulse wrote:Reminds me of the 2 grumpy guys (Statler & Waldorf) in the balcony on The Muppet Show.
thanks, that's what I shoot for.

and I've never heard any of your other songs, but strictly from this song how can you call yourself an MC? Do you rap in your other ones?

Posted: Thu Mar 08, 2007 8:00 pm
by The Anchors
DJ Big Dick wrote:The Anchors - A medium large dick.
WTF? Medium!?! You dirty fuckin' chav.

Posted: Thu Mar 08, 2007 8:04 pm
by Devil Tongue
It's funny to me to listen to a rapper and a DJ discuss whether one has the right to call himself an MC. That is funny to me. :lol:

Posted: Thu Mar 08, 2007 8:07 pm
by DJ Big Dick
The Anchors wrote:
DJ Big Dick wrote:The Anchors - A medium large dick.
WTF? Medium!?! You dirty fuckin' chav.
I said medium large shitface. That's larger than medium but not quite large.

Posted: Thu Mar 08, 2007 8:12 pm
by Billy's Little Trip
I say you go give him an Asian and perform an addadicktomy to BLT......in the literal sense of course. :shock: