Ms Winters, white courtesy phone (Cheer Up Shelley reviews)

roymond · Post by **roymond** » Mon Dec 13, 2004 12:45 pm

Buy that lady a drink!

GlennCase · Post by **GlennCase** » Mon Dec 13, 2004 5:33 pm

Re: the delay of art for this fight. Sorry.

I asked a guest artist to do art for this title, but didn't hear back from them. I told Bortwein that I was asking the guest to do this artwork, and didn't think about the fact that he may not have gotten the e-mail, or may not have had time to do the art.

ROCK!

Glenn (DR FUNK)

Rabid Garfunkel · Post by **Rabid Garfunkel** » Tue Dec 14, 2004 3:12 pm

Hey Voice, not a single instance, not an iota of reference even, of "Hang On Sloopy" in my entry, heh. Hope you exorcised "Cheer Up Charlie" as handily!

Game on!

Exorcised... yeah, that's a good word for the tone setting. I brought the spooky, oh yeah.

jack · Post by **jack** » Tue Dec 14, 2004 4:56 pm

these are just my thoughts
before you get all upset
and call me bad names..........

brice henry and the transformers
bombs in my left ear
now it bombs in my right ear
i guess it just bombs

chuck the bear
octave harmonies
nice job recording the drums
glenn is on the case

drunken english majors
sweet pretty pickins
i wish the vox were louder
and more harmonies

john, penny, and harriet
i'm not really sure
but something here reminds me
of johnny cashpoint

masters of grip
real nice production
chorus sounds like johnny c
is that the choppa?

MISS
the bass it clips bad
i want to drown in reverb
but i like your vox

rabid garfunkel
warp factor is good
makes me think wall of voodoo
this was pretty good

roymond
e bow is awesome
mix wise reminds me of ADD
seems to run too long

squirrel damage
the fat organ rules
as do simple progressions
when they are done right

faves: roymond, squirrel damage, rabid. i think roymond deserves it.

GlennCase · Post by **GlennCase** » Tue Dec 14, 2004 5:05 pm

Jack is too funny
choosing to review this week
in haiku format

ROCK!

Glenn (DR FUNK)

feldspar · Post by **feldspar** » Tue Dec 14, 2004 5:10 pm

Gosh, I haven't done this in like a gadzillion years. Review time.

Cheer Up Shelley

Brice Henry and the Transformers: Your vocal delivery kind of reminds me of a less mumbly Marcus Kellis. A less good one, too. The tinny drums in this annoyed me. The droning backup vocals and the nasally lead vocals didn't help. This song is just more annoying than anything else. Nice guitar solo, though. That part gets an [okay], but the rest is [bad].

Chuck the Bear: I like this right off the bat. Vocals are nice. Guitar is nice. It has melody. It has lyrics. The drums are too loud. And is that an accordion solo at 1:45? Or maybe it's a guitar. Or a violin or something. I can't tell. Bring that forward in the mix! Also, I think that this might just be a bit too long. It drags on after the guitar solo. Brevity is the soul of wit, remember. [good]

The Drunken English Majors: Love the guitar. Lose the singer and then maybe you've got a good song. Singing + moaning = not good. The parts where you enunciate more sound a lot better. [okay]

John, Penny and Harriet: Are those even words? [bad]

Masters of Grip: Sounds all right, though the vocals fall pretty flat on me and the backing vocals don't add anything. Good guitar, solid production. But your singing needs work. And by 'work', I mean 'a lot of work'. [okay]

MISS: Why are you whispering? [bad]

Rabid Garfunkel: Nifty organ. The guitar is kind of aggravating. Find someone to sing for you. I don't really like spoken word songs like this. [okay]

Roymond: I really like the atmosphere of this. It gets kind of loud and seems kind of busy at times. Drags on at the end. Brevity, wit, et cetera. [good]

Squirrel Damage: The organ part is great. The drum track seems, like, I dunno. Jumpy, I guess. This is pretty [good].

Vote --> Roymond!

GlennCase · Post by **GlennCase** » Tue Dec 14, 2004 5:38 pm

feldspar wrote:
Chuck the Bear: The drums are too loud. And is that an accordion solo at 1:45? Or maybe it's a guitar. Or a violin or something. I can't tell. Bring that forward in the mix!

EDIT: I changed this
The name of this instrument
is melodica

I edited this
with only one intention:
Now it is Haiku

I copied Jack Shite
It's not really that funny
but it makes me laugh

ROCK!

Glenn (DR FUNK)

Caravan Ray · Post by **Caravan Ray** » Tue Dec 14, 2004 6:54 pm

jack shite wrote:

john, penny, and harriet
i'm not really sure
but something here reminds me
of johnny cashpoint

I'd prefer it reminded you of Caravan Ray.

I don't know why Fightmaster chose to list this under my email name rather than my normal nom do Songfight. Quite funny really - given the lyrical content of this song (Feldspar - just because they're completely indecipherable - doesn't mean they're not words!).

Suffice to say - my wife and daughter had no input into this one - and I've got no idea who this 'John' character is?!?

-caravan ray

Geoff WreckdoM · Post by **Geoff WreckdoM** » Tue Dec 14, 2004 7:16 pm

John, Penny and Harriet wrote: I don't know why Fightmaster chose to list this under my email name rather than my normal nom do Songfight.

Same thing happened to us with "Zombie Son", it was because we forgot to put the band name in our email, and I was so amused to see my real name there instead that I never asked to have it changed.

Tony Asbestos · Post by **Tony Asbestos** » Tue Dec 14, 2004 7:23 pm

Roymond- I like how you kept the high EQ manageable in the beginning droning part. It could have easily been grating on the ears. there is some cool stuff going on. You did a good job on the mix. B
rice Henry and the Transformers- Big Chunk of sound. Voice is a little off-key- Consistently flat. The percussion is kinda cool. Then comes the solo. This isn't great, but not awful. C
Rabid Garfunkel- Pretty good production. I like the organ and tremolo guitar. Now those words don't do much for me- like a Jim Morrison impersonator. Shelley is going to have a hard time cheering up if she is lifeless and inanimate. This has a good 60s sci fi feel. C+
MISS- Vocals remind me of Donovan. The backing might sound better if it was a couple octaves higher. The background whispers work well. B-
Chuck the Bear- Groovy groovester. Unique drum sounds. This is better than the average SF entry, I kinda like it. Competent use of backing vocals. What is the instrument in the solo? Break it down for me fellas. A-
Masters of Grip- Starts right in, doesn't it? Is this the one that someone compared to J$? That's him, isn't it? This song needs to do something unexpected, it just kinda plods along. The ending is cool. C
The Drunken English Majors- I think I read about this one on the boards. I can't help thinking of that acoustic Green Day song "Time of Your Life"- it sounds like that at the beginning. But I don't think there were any 7th chords in that one. I guess I am looking for something more dynamic. C+
Squirrel Damage- That moog really does sound like an organ, doesn't it? I messed with the settings. Tempo should be a little faster. The chorus is OK, at least melody-wise. Oh yeah, and I found my whammy bar. Advise me on how to mix this better.
John, Penny and Harriet- Just when I was thinking that this fight was all above average I heard this one... The descending part is OK. D+

An OK fight.

GlennCase · Post by **GlennCase** » Tue Dec 14, 2004 7:27 pm

Tony Asbestos wrote: Chuck the Bear- Groovy groovester. Unique drum sounds. This is better than the average SF entry, I kinda like it. Competent use of backing vocals. What is the instrument in the solo? Break it down for me fellas. A-

Since it keeps coming up
we used a melodica
during our song's solo

Thanks, nice reviewer
I am glad you like the song
Justin will be proud

ROCK!

Glenn (DR FUNK)

j$ · Post by j$ » Tue Dec 14, 2004 7:32 pm

IMO. Written as I listen (on broadband no less!)

John, Penny & Harriet - Great tune, that production is non-existent. Maybe it just needs some maximizing. I like the filter on the chorus vocal. Obviously Benny Cemoli's 'Keep in Touch' covered this subject matter far better lyrically

I Like that a lot, I'd just like to hear it better.

SD - Lovely. A little plodding perhaps - maybe a few bpm faster? Or a slightly more complicated drum pattern under the chorus? That bridge line 'now you're looking like ...' what? Could do with a nice fat metal style guitar solo in the middle. I like the first 1.20 very much it doesn't really go anywhere after that. But good.

Rice Henry - Nice guitar tone in the intro. Hats are a bit loud/hot/overpowering. the singing is not great - it could do with a bit more bassiness at the recording stage maybe. I get pretty bored at 1:30 although those backing vocals are good. Is that you again or someone else? I like the gas station line. Hmmm, could do with something other than the straight on the beat strumming. Guitar solo is good but doesn't seem to be mixed very well into the song. Not bad I guess. It nees more variation chordally at 2.30-2.45. I didn't make it to the end.

(edit - I just noticed you have songs in both fights. This makes me wonder if you had concentrated on tidying this up / rerecording / working on the mix, you might have had a good song rather than an average demo. Let this be a lesson to you. *wags finger school-ma'amishly*)

Roymond - My mp3 player says this is 9:51! Tell me it's not true! Very Bowie-esque! I like this, but fear of prog-length is making me slightly nervous. I like the descending stop/start bridge (or chorus - it's hard to describe sections of a multi-section song accurately) - the harmonies are really nice. Nice solo too. The drum patterns could do with some variation maybe? SOrry for my AAD but I started skipping at 3.40 so I may have missed some cool stuff.

Drunken English Majors - I hate your band name by the way. Musically sounds like Toad the Wet Sprocket to me. Nice little MOR doodling. For the record, I did my Sober English Major Thesis in Mary Shelley so I dispute 'you're ugly but you write a damn good book.' Also Mary was an only child, and Percy as Monster is a hypothesis not supported by the book! If anythign Mary=monster Frankenstein=Godwin ( her dad). But I digress. Overall, harmless.

MISS - Oh lovely tune. The vocals and the progression I mean. I don't like the (lack of) arrangement particularly. I'd like to hear this much more in a Massive Attack dark trip hop vein, going on for four minutes, but it's cool. Let me remix this!

Chuck the Bear - I remain unmoved by Scary Go Round (though I like the art). The melody combined with the cool strumming is nice but sounds utterly familiar. The drums are clipping in the Bridge. Cool though. maybe some (more) verb there would make it sound full. Nice harmonies on the chorus. Mix is slightly wonky. i like the fairground keyboard solo thing. About a minute too long.

Rabid Garfunkel - he. Like the monster mash keyboard. Some great stuff going on here. It needs a sung chorus to set off the spoken word verses though.

MOG - I like almost all of this. The guitar is cool all the way through, especially on the mad guitar solo - vocally, nice melody on the verse & bridge. The bass line is smart

The mix is nice and loose and sounds like MOG live

The backing vocals are a bit sour, especially on the key change, though I do like the ooh aahs on the second verse. J$ f**ks up another song! If you will start throwing f9s around, you're asking for trouble

the lyric is quite sad and poignant while being patently ridiculous at the same time, which is a difficult thing to achieve. Maybe a nice fat snyth on the chorus wouldn't go amiss. Hmmmm.

(For the record, I wrote & played the bass-line, helped out on the lyric, and recorded the backing vocals. This is not me under an assumed alias.)

Roymond is too long, MISS is too short, Caravan Ray is too quiet, RG is too arty. But they're my four favourites. I will probably vote for MISS. Or Roymond.

roymond · Post by **roymond** » Tue Dec 14, 2004 7:59 pm

j$ wrote:Roymond - My mp3 player says this is 9:51! Tell me it's not true! Very Bowie-esque! I like this, but fear of prog-length is making me slightly nervous. I like the descending stop/start bridge (or chorus - it's hard to describe sections of a multi-section song accurately) - the harmonies are really nice. Nice solo too. The drum patterns could do with some variation maybe? SOrry for my AAD but I started skipping at 3.40 so I may have missed some cool stuff.

Well, it's half that long, but granted perhaps too long by 8 bars. If the solo section were proper you'd never notice

But thanks for listening to even a moment. If both my kids weren't sick perhaps I'd have done a final mix and cut those extra bars. And THEN what would you say? huh? HUH?

No, really, thanks! I'm just glad to get something out again.

j$ · Post by j$ » Tue Dec 14, 2004 8:04 pm

Oooh, don't play the sick kids guilt trip card! I hope they're better soon. I did really like this; I'd like to hear a finished up version for sure. It's really inventive and intruiging, and well-performed, as I have come to expect from you, sir.

I am also glad to hear more from you. [/suck up]

j$

Rabid Garfunkel · Post by **Rabid Garfunkel** » Wed Dec 15, 2004 2:04 am

Damn, Roymond pulled of the sonic mood I thought I had hit. Nice sort of Vangelis (sp?) Blade Runner soundtrack feel to the music.

Caravan Ray's getting some closer listens too. I want to really like it, but I don't know why yet. Is your avatar the bona fide Mark Reid (sp? Do I even have the Chop-chop's name right?) or an Eric Bana promo shot, eh?

And then there's my ripping off Mary Shelley, heh. Too arty? Thanks j$, that's practically quotable.

Real reviews eventually...

Caravan Ray · Post by **Caravan Ray** » Wed Dec 15, 2004 5:02 am

[quote="Rabid Garfunkel"]
Is your avatar the bona fide Mark Reid (sp? Do I even have the Chop-chop's name right?) or an Eric Bana promo shot, eh?

[quote]

Yep - thats the real Mark Brandon "Chopper" Read - although it may as well be Eric Bana. The job that bloke did in looking like Chop-Chop was nothing short of amazing. Apparently he bulked up by about 20kg just for the role. Prior to Chopper, Eric Bana was only know in Aust. for doing TV sketch comedy - his role in that movie blew everyone away. Although I suppose he had a lot of incentive - Chopper's alive and well and living in Tasmania, I believe - and you wouldn't want to piss him off by playing him badly.

Fried · Post by **Fried** » Wed Dec 15, 2004 9:21 am

These are written as I listen.

Brice Henry and the Transformers: You seriously need to find someone else to sing for your songs. Your vocals are not flat in spots, they are flat everywhere. The music is repetitive and not all that interesting. It just feels like you bit off more than you could mix.
Maybe try something simpler?

Chuck the Bear: Nice intro. I am feeling it. Vocals are good. The drums need help. The snare and toms sound muffled and it feels to far forward in the mix. As far as a song, I like it. The overall feel is very good. The backing vocals and flow is excellent. Grade A stuff here.

The Drunken English Majors: I usually don't like folk. This is not bad. The lyrics don't get me in the corner. "You're ugly but you write a damn good book"? The song's pretty but not a damn good song.

John, Penny and Harriet Hmmmm... Over compressed for sure. A collaboration? The parts don't feel each other. Sorry.

Masters of Grip Another folksy song. The vocals sound like they are stumbling over the lyrics. The background vocals need something. I do start to like the music when the lead starts.

MISS: Damn. Are you trying to cheer up Shelly or push her over the edge? The song is short, simple and uninteresting. Not for me.

Rabid Garfunkel: Wreckdom? Oh wait, it isn't. I love this. Very interesting. Great use of space. I love headphone music.

Roymond: Intro has me interested. Music is excellent! Vocals are excellent! Whole song is ... do I need to say it again?... I think I do, this is excellent.

Squirrel Damage The closest thing to rock in the list! Good feel. Music is nice. Good song!

Ones I liked in this fight. Chuck the Bear, Roymond , Rabid Garfunkel , Squirrel Damage

Vote: Roymond stands out after a second listen.

Jim of Seattle · Post by **Jim of Seattle** » Wed Dec 15, 2004 7:36 pm

Favorites in blue

I don't know, I'm tired. This was a fine fight, but I apologize in advance for having nothing worthwhile to say about any of these songs. This isn't my best work. I've been yawning all day. I do think it's interesting that no one interpreted the title as a command for someone to go and cheer Shelley up, but instead as a command directly to Shelley herself, which would, of course, require a comma after "up". Oh shut up, me.

Brice Henry
Your singing is really unlistenable. I question your musical ear if you are willing to submit a song with vocals of this low quality. The song itself is repetitive but not horrible.

Chuck the Bear
Very catchy and fun. Love the doubled-vocals. Drums seem strangely thin and weird, but it doesn't really detract. I love it. 

Drunken English Majors
Kind of cool. Great guitars of course, and nice performance. Not sure if the lyrics really play for me. Seems a little like you don't really mean it, et it doesn't really have a campy funny quality either, so I come away a little confused. Still, very nice work.

John, Penny and Harriet
Recipe for a song Jim will hate: 1 part fuzz guitar, 1 part distorted vocals that can't be understood. Mix poorly. Serves 4.

Masters of Grip
OK. Not a lot to say about it. Doesn't ever involve me. Can't understand the lyrics well enough, not well sung enough. Too long.

Miss
Sort of effectively creepy. Can't say I adore this 1:05, but I think you accomplished what you set out to do. You probably know what this song is about, and I wish I did. The tone makes me feel like she's going to be executed or something. This works.

Rabid Garfunkel
The opening is right out of Phantom of the Opera, which I can't stand. But it's not your fault I hate Phantom of the Opera. This is sort of z-grade slasher movie soundtrack sounding. Yeah, it has a certain Halloween charm, but I can't tell your take on your material. Is it campy or do you mean it? If I knew that it would help me appreciate the song better.

Roymond
I like the nonsense lyrics. This is cool. No idea what it's about.

Squirrel Damage
Left me completely comment-free. Fine work. Not very interesting, I'm afraid.

Caravan Ray · Post by **Caravan Ray** » Wed Dec 15, 2004 7:53 pm

j$ wrote: Caravan Ray - Obviously Benny Cemoli's 'Keep in Touch' covered this subject matter far better lyrically

I checked out Benny's work. I thought he sounded like a mere cad, whereas I think the character in this song is a complete bounder, albeit an incompehensible one.

Rabid Garfunkel · Post by **Rabid Garfunkel** » Wed Dec 15, 2004 8:02 pm

Jim, the lyrics are straight out of a scene in the end of Shelley's book Frankenstein, where Victor goes back to his wedding bed where his dead wife is still... (he found her earlier, had a little Victorian(?) freak out, then went back) and sees his monster in the window, mocking him.

Aside from it being my favorite scene in the book, the making of the song is me saying to old, dead, tormented Mary "Hey babe, lighten up a little, huh?"

Oh, and serious, not camp is my take. Can't help it if the Italian '60s horror flicks shape my sensibilities for things like this. Never heard Weber's "Phantom", so that was just a coincidence.

Really hoping there's a Bram Stoker bug eating title soon, heh.

Edit: Just realized I've done two horror songs now (the other being the "Wolfman" heavy Cur). Cool.

DELETED · Post by **DELETED** » Thu Dec 16, 2004 10:22 am

DELETED

Rabid Garfunkel · Post by **Rabid Garfunkel** » Thu Dec 16, 2004 11:18 am

Chuckles wrote:Did this have anything to do with "Cheer Up Shelly"?

Read the post before yours, sport.

Ms Winters, white courtesy phone (Cheer Up Shelley reviews)

Ms Winters, white courtesy phone (Cheer Up Shelley reviews)

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