The Song Fight Bulletin Board

By: Andrew Reist

People say it's hard to grow up living in this world
When you're constantly surrounded by a half a million nerds
Rolling up and bust you up and reaching in your skirt
They just wanna take your money and drive off without a word

I don't have the time for this
Don't got the mindfulness
Don't got the finances to lead me on

I don't have the time for this
Don't got the mindfulness
Don't got the finances to lead me on

These idiots are always getting up within my space
I just wish that they would vanish or run off without a trace
I don't have the patience To deal with these people
who don't understand where I'm coming from and that I am the man

With the money in my pocket
They reach in and I'm like stop it
They run of with my cash and these moronics will just drop it

These people they dont have any conscience
They ignore my responses
They think I dont have to be conscious of what they're doing

People say it's hard to grow up living in this world
When you're constantly surrounded by a half a million nerds
Rolling up and bust you up and reaching in your skirt
They just wanna take your money and drive off without a word

It's sad when the rich have gotta take from the poor
And they profit from the war and they take even more
The poor have got nothing and the rich have got it all
And you don't know what to say to them when at the top of the wall

They ride around in their private jets
They look down and spit on our happiness
They look at us and act like we have never met
and i'll tell you there is one thing in life that i regret

I don't know what to say
I don't know how to say it
I don't know what's at stake
I don't know who is playing

I don't know what to say
I don't know how to say it
I don't know what's at stake
I don't know who is playing

People say it's hard to grow up living in this world
When you're constantly surrounded by a half a million nerds
Rolling up and bust you up and reaching in your skirt
They just wanna take your money and drive off without a word

I don't have the time for this
Don't got the mindfulness
Don't got the finances to lead me on

I don't have the time for this
Don't got the mindfulness
Don't got the finances to lead me on

How am I supposed to accurately critique this industry
When I am just trying to get by with my family?
I do everything I can what I gotta do all day
But I can't stand by while cocksuckers get paid

I don't know what to say
I don't know how to say it
I don't know what's at stake
I don't know who is playing

I don't know what to say
I don't know how to say it
I don't know what's at stake
I don't know who is playing

People say it's hard to grow up living in this world
When you're constantly surrounded by a half a million nerds
Rolling up and bust you up and reaching in your skirt
They just wanna take your money and drive off without a word

Back in the day, I was all about rockin my E.T. T-shirt
Stayin inside watchin Star Trek reruns
And learnin how to program my Commodore 64

But that all changed, now that I'm a man
I've touched a woman's boobs, I rock out with a band
No longer reading UNIX manuals just for fun
I'm my basement doin BPM calculations

Half a million nerds are gonna drop some science on you
Half a million nerds are stopping by to remind you
You can run but you can never hide
We still know who you are inside
A music geek still counts as a nerd. Nerd!

(half a million nerds play kazoos)

Well that's not fair, you've got me pegged all wrong
You nerds and kazoos can get out of my song
I'm a hipster, I'm edgy through and through
Now if you'll excuse me, I've got some mixing down to do

Half a million nerds are gonna drop some science on you
Half a million nerds are stopping by to remind you
You can run but you can never hide
We still know who you are inside
A music geek still counts as a nerd. Nerd!

Here's what I had planned for my submission. The words were almost the same as those originally submitted to the Lyric Mart. I picked the crappier of the two, because the second really seemed like it wanted to be a rock song, and I didn't have the heart to butcher it. This bad boy, though... it practically screamed for this treatment.

I am still not upset with the plans I had for it. However, the implementation did fall flat in a number of areas.

Half a Million Nerds

[Chanting in the background, looping. This should be heard once through before the verses start.]
They have the brains but not the braun!
They shape society but live anon!

[For each verse, the first and last line are spoken with
a crisp, clear tone. The middle two lines sound shouted out
by the crowd. The last line has a reverse echo which starts before the the middle two lines are heard.]

In the minds of a half million nerds
Culture slips!
Troubles fade!
... technology shines.

In the eyes of half a million nerds
Shunned by girls!
Beaten by jocks!
... solutions twinkle.

In the heart of half a million nerds
Feelings lurch!
Heartache looms!
... love is purloined.

[For the last verse, the chanting should stop just before the last line becomes clear.]

By the hands of half a million nerds
Answers found!
Knots unraveled!
... life is improved.

Half a Million Nerds

It was a strained alliance
I guess says it best
I was always a good student
at least I did well on tests
but where I struggled the most
was when I tried to be cool
so it always upset me
when I was lumped in at school with

Half a Million Nerds

I was always afraid
of what I might be inside
avoiding Star Trek conventions
just to salvage my pride
I would go to extremes
pretending not to like math
the mention of Pythagoras
would put me right back on the path with

Half a Million Nerds

I'm at odds with what I want to be
There's a mathlete stuck inside of me
I've been a jock I've been a burnout, too
is it now time for me to succumb to... ?

Half a Million Nerds

(incredible, mind-blowing synthesizer solo)

Half a Million Nerds

Half A Million Nerds by Jan Krüger

I first noticed it on IRC
No scriptkiddies, no spam and no abuse
I thought perhaps a netsplit isolated me
But when nothing changed I checked the news
It was all over reddit, stumble, Digg and Slashdot too
Romania is gone, no one knows why but it is true
A funny language, now it's gone, the countryside as well
I can't believe it, that must be what it's like in hell

'Cause half a million geeks
Will never see the light of day again
Can't you see it's wrong
All the rest were freaks
With no brains and no attention span
I don't think they belong
But half a million nerds
I can't tell you how much it hurts

Great, now reddit doesn't update anymore
How am I supposed to last the day
I don't remember what I did before
Let's see what the stale news have to say
There it says on CNN, New York City disappeared
That would explain why reddit's dead, the killers interfered
Who are they, what are their goals and why the bloody war
Lots of brilliant people dead, I can't take it anymore

'Cause half a million geeks
Will never see the light of day again
Can't you see it's wrong
All the rest were freaks
With no brains and no attention span
I don't think they belong
But half a million nerds
I can't tell you how much it hurts

Who cares about the normal folks, chatty and really slow
For all intents and purposes they are just for show
Good riddance to boring people, but why kill all the nerds
This monumental wrongfulness, I can't explain in words

'Cause half a million geeks
Will never see the light of day again
Can't you see it's wrong
All the rest were freaks
With no brains and no attention span
I don't think they belong
But half a million nerds
I can't tell you how much it hurts
But half a million nerds
I can't tell you how much it hurts

Half A Million Nerds - Paco del Stinko

Indirectly responsible
For bringing on the end
Working for the Pentagon
A slide-rule for a friend
It didn't take very long, to build a better bomb

Half a million nerds stacked up to the sky
No more killing words laughing 'til we die

Bullied in school
Time for the payback
They went from being Alice
To being the Vic Tayback
Dweeby and rich, revenge is one sweet bitch

Half a million nerds stacked up to the sky
No more killing words laughing 'til we die

You laugh and you scoff while the calculus paid off
You played the fiddlesticks while they did their statistics
But now it's time to stop them for real
Turn this war around and send them home on their heels

Half a million nerds stacked up to the sky
No more killing words laughing 'til we die

half a million nerds - abominominous

a lot of reasons not to write a love letter to life
a load of moribund and medicated never-do's
take a lot of pain to travel just a quarter kilometer in those shoes

you can pawn your na na na's
and you can settle for surrender insulated by someday
incorporate a level of n-never gettin' better
til' the bread becomes your bed and then your bed becomes your grave

for every half a million nerds who won't
there's only half a handful that will

There are a lot of reasons to hate my song and one of them is the illogical chorus. Why are only half a million nerds afraid of my birds, if its happening at random? I guess they're nerds, so they could've came up with some sort of formula to figure out which ones were next.

Beaks against your brains
Beaks against your brains
Beaks against your brains
Beaks against your brains
Say hello to my feathered friends
Broke your glasses, cracked the lens
Look at the vibrancy of the blood on their wings
Listen to the coos and the caws it brings

Half a million nerds
Are afraid of my birds
I trained 'em to kill
Half a mill
No tellin' which ones
Until its done
So, come on, have some fun

You can't look over your shoulder
They're comin' from the air
So when the air gets colder
Maybe you should run
Watch out for the breeze
Watch out for the breeze
Watch out for the breeze
Watch out for the breeze

Half a million nerds
Are afraid of my birds
I trained 'em to kill
Half a mill
No tellin' which ones
Until its done
So, come on, have some fun

Half a million nerds
(Heine, dec. 2008)


Half a million nerds
you don't know how it hurts
to be one of them
waiting for a friend
but you won't give up
until you're glad again.
Half a million nerds.

What's become of me?
I should be happy.
Turned the TV on
someone told a joke.
Everybody laughed
I just had to choke.
What has become of me?

Sunny skies and apple ice
marshmallow mountains - it is time that flies
7 chocolate dreams - nothing's what it seems
everything was fine, when I was a child

Now I'm old and grey,
but happy anyway
I was one of them
but got a helping hand.
And it made me feel
like I'm alive again.
I am happy anyway.

Sunny skies and apple ice
living by the sea - it is time that flies
so close to my dreams - that's just what it seems
everything is fine, since that change of mind

Half a million nerds
less one.

IBM foolishly sought to acquire
an OS pitched by some surly lookin' kid
cause to him, it was the start of an empire
and one from which we would make our ruling bid

all opposition faced we subdue
of that which Billy has unfurled
we got a piece of every home computer sold to you
and that's how half a million nerds conquered the world

that hippy Steve caught a brief glimpse of the future
when he won Palo Alto's newest tech
we gained his trust, used his own concepts to ensure
Win 3.1 seized him by his turtle neck

all opposition faced we must quash
we took what Apple stole from Xerox for the Macintosh
of that which Billy has unfurled
and that's how half a million nerds conquered the world