The Song Fight Bulletin Board

Finally have my first song, accompanied by a slideshow, up on youtube. check it if you want, let me know what you think, I'd definitely appreciate helpful criticism. Thanks =D

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RQpdZR4vwPw

Well hey, look at you and your techno-dancefloor-rap style!

On bassy headphones, the vox are lost in the background. Double-em, triple-em, move 'em to the front. The dj/club "stop" was right where I was thinking "hey, it's time for a little break it down now". Main bassline's fuzzy and somewhat out of control in the sonic picture, sounds more like a bad EQ/effect choice than an intended thing.

/my non-technical 2¢

Reminded me of the Disposable Heroes of Hiphoprisy (sp?):

Rabid Garfunkel wrote:Well hey, look at you and your techno-dancefloor-rap style!

On bassy headphones, the vox are lost in the background. Double-em, triple-em, move 'em to the front. The dj/club "stop" was right where I was thinking "hey, it's time for a little break it down now". Main bassline's fuzzy and somewhat out of control in the sonic picture, sounds more like a bad EQ/effect choice than an intended thing.

/my non-technical 2¢

Reminded me of the Disposable Heroes of Hiphoprisy (sp?):

Dude, you need better headphones, cause on my speakers this sounds like NIN, RATM, and the Beastie Boys had a baby

HeadShot wrote:let me know what you think

Bristol Palin's baby, maybe.

If you're looking for handjobs, don't post it publicly. Leave it up on your mom's fridge for her to show off with your baby photos when company comes over to be bored out of their minds on a Sunday afternoon. How fucking precious.

Wow, what a dick. Even just listening/watching was way more than I would have done, but I was amazed to see you went on to give a lengthy descriptive analysis, even as far as digging up a link to another video for comparison purposes. And for all your trouble you get informed that your opinion is wrong. Nice.

Christ, yo, don't be jumping down my throat, all I said was it ain't fricken techno!

"Dance-floor", my ass.

Besides, the bass ain't fuzzy at ALL on my speakers, headphones, car stereo, etc.

I will admit, the vocals do need to be turned up, but that is ALL

Hahaha

Turned the vox up, and removed the instrument that was making the bass sound fuzzy

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o17qsuuykzw

HeadShot wrote:let me know what you think, I'd definitely appreciate helpful criticism.

HeadShot wrote:Dude, you need better headphones

HeadShot wrote:I will admit, the vocals do need to be turned up, but that is ALL

Don't ask for opinions/criticism if you are just going to argue with it.
Instead, ask for people to tell you how awesome your shit is, if that's what you are looking for. (And ask for it someplace else, if that is the case).

Look, it's one thing if I can hear what he's talking about. It's another thing if I test it on 6 different kind of speakers, listening carefully for what he's telling me, and still not finding it. If I can't find the mistakes somebody's telling me to fix, how can I fix them?

And how the hell can I trust the opinion of someone who's calling my music dancefloor techno?

Maybe instead of criticising me on how I take criticism, you should be doing something better with your time. Or at least giving me tips I can actually use.

HeadShot wrote:Turned the vox up, and removed the instrument that was making the bass sound fuzzy

HeadShot wrote:Look, it's one thing if I can hear what he's talking about. It's another thing if I test it on 6 different kind of speakers, listening carefully for what he's telling me, and still not finding it. If I can't find the mistakes somebody's telling me to fix, how can I fix them?

And yet you acted on the observations...

To better hear how things sit in a mix, listen to it with the volume down way low (so low you could have a quiet conversation with someone while it's playing) and adjust after you've got your loud mixing done. Then go back to the loud mixing and fine tune.

Rabid Garfunkel wrote:

HeadShot wrote:Turned the vox up, and removed the instrument that was making the bass sound fuzzy

HeadShot wrote:Look, it's one thing if I can hear what he's talking about. It's another thing if I test it on 6 different kind of speakers, listening carefully for what he's telling me, and still not finding it. If I can't find the mistakes somebody's telling me to fix, how can I fix them?

And yet you acted on the observations...

To better hear how things sit in a mix, listen to it with the volume down way low (so low you could have a quiet conversation with someone while it's playing) and adjust after you've got your loud mixing done. Then go back to the loud mixing and fine tune.

I didn't hear it as fuzzy, myself, but I figured if it was such a big deal, I'd get rid of the instrument. I appreciate the advice

Listened to the newer version. Vocal rhythm isn't good. Plosives and thin-sounding vox. Fun synths, except for the drumkit. Didn't listen to the words; arrangement/structure not particularly exciting. Sorry for not finding any positive points; I'm not that much into this kind of music.
Oh, by the way, that's not a music video. It's a song with a slideshow of boring and irrelevant pictures. Just because other people do that, too, it's not automatically a good idea. It's actually a pretty shitty idea.

HeadShot wrote:Look, it's one thing if I can hear what he's talking about. It's another thing if I test it on 6 different kind of speakers, listening carefully for what he's telling me, and still not finding it. If I can't find the mistakes somebody's telling me to fix, how can I fix them?

And how the hell can I trust the opinion of someone who's calling my music dancefloor techno?

Maybe instead of criticising me on how I take criticism, you should be doing something better with your time. Or at least giving me tips I can actually use.

I'll bite. I've got a couple of tips you can actually use.

1. Asking people to take time out of their day to give you opinions on your song, then telling them their headphones must be broken if they don't think it's made of awesome isn't going to get you very far around here. People have better things to do with their time than be belittled for doing YOU a favor. I'll pass.

2. So, you disagreed with the opinion you got, but changed your song anyway? You're in for a difficult time, then, because music is subjective, and 50 people are going to have 50 different opinions about your song. Are you going to change it for every one of those 50? Opinions are great, but if you don't agree with them have some respect for you own artistic vision.

jast wrote: Oh, by the way, that's not a music video. It's a song with a slideshow of boring and irrelevant pictures. Just because other people do that, too, it's not automatically a good idea. It's actually a pretty shitty idea.

It's not that bad an idea. Sure it's just a slideshow and not really a video - but it is a way of getting songs on utube with more than just a blank screen.

I would like to do something similar myself, but don't know where to start. I don't really want to devote a lot of time to learning how to make videos. Video making doesn't really interest me. But I would like to put some stuff on utube.

Did you use Powerpoint of something Headshot? What is the easiest way to do something like that?

BTW - I will agree with Jast that I don't think your slideshow worked very well. I'm not really qualified to suggest why - I just didn't find it interesting.

As for the song - meh - it was alll a bit cliched with the self-referential lyrics and stuff. But maybe I just don't understand dancefloor techno...

HeadShot wrote:

Rabid Garfunkel wrote:On bassy headphones, the vox are lost in the background.

Dude, you need better headphones, cause on my speakers ...

HeadShot wrote:I test it on 6 different kind of speakers,

You haven't heard it on his headphones, though. If you want people to come hear your shit and tell you how hot it is on your six pairs of speakers, have a cd release party at your house and show off your six pairs of speakers. If you want to be able to mix music that the general public will be able to listen to -- on shitty computer speakers, mediocre headphones, an old staticky boombox, their grandma's car stereo -- then you need people's opinions based on their preferred listening medium. Good luck selling records if you insist your fans all buy better equipment so your record sounds good to them.

HeadShot wrote:Maybe instead of criticising me on how I take criticism, you should be doing something better with your time. Or at least giving me tips I can actually use.

I was at work at the time, so I was getting paid to criticize you on how you take criticism. You have no right to tell me how I spend my time. My tip you can should actually use was, don't be a dick. Take it or leave it.

Although all of you who are hating on the non-video, he did warn you:

HeadShot wrote:my first song, accompanied by a slideshow

this thread rocks

Clearly, you have the right attitude to be an MC. Keep that shit up and don't back down. It comes through in your vocal delivery. You rap with balls. That's good.

On the other hand, maybe you should think about getting some decent flow.

AND JESUS CHRIST, OUR LORD AND SAVIOR, IF YOU EVER AGAIN COMPARE YOURSELF TO POPULAR ARTISTS I WILL JUMP RIGHT THROUGH THIS COMPUTER AND COME OUT OF YOURS AND BEAT YOUR ASS TO A BLOODY PULP. JUST STOP IT. IT DOES A DISSERVICE TO EVERYONE INVOLVED.

I used Windows Movie Maker to make the shitty slideshow

OH, and btw, in case you couldn't read this in my description, I'm using AUDACITY, and A COMPUTER MICROPHONE

With NO training in sound engineering at all.

But sorry, I forgot, they don't approve of people who can't afford pro-tools and condenser microphones here. I'll go spend my time on something more intelligent, like trying to teach myself trigonometry.

HeadShot wrote:But sorry, I forgot, they don't approve of people who can't afford pro-tools and condenser microphones here. I'll go spend my time on something more intelligent, like trying to teach myself trigonometry.

So hallucinating people telling you that you need more expensive gear makes you feel annoyed? Why don't you just hallucinate people giving you elaborate 700-page advice in a self-depreciating tone about how to make your song even more perfect than it already is? I'm sure you could instantly feel a lot better if you did.

Look, I for one would have gladly explained my feedback more clearly if you'd simply asked, perhaps even to the point of writing a little tutorial. Do you think I have any training in "sound engineering"? No, I learned by experimenting a lot and by listening to people's feedback. I didn't even always manage to hear the things people criticized me for. If nothing else, feedback can give you an idea of what to listen for more attentively in the future.

If you get all defensive and passive aggressive about it instead, well, let's just say it doesn't motivate me to provide any feedback the next time.

HeadShot wrote:I used Windows Movie Maker to make the shitty slideshow

OH, and btw, in case you couldn't read this in my description, I'm using AUDACITY, and A COMPUTER MICROPHONE

With NO training in sound engineering at all.

Well good for you, but knowing that doesn't make the song sound any less roughshod.

There have been good Songfight entries recorded with computer microphones. Reportedly, State Shirt's "New Planet" was recorded on a computer mic. I think jb has gotten away with it from time to time as well, but we'd need him to come in with specific details if that's true.

We assume that you want your songs to sound good. Not just "good for some dude with a computer microphone and a copy of Audacity," but actually good. Good enough to impress people without needing to tell them the obstacles that you had to overcome to produce the track. The people on this forum are, largely, offering advice to meet that end. If that's not your goal, feel free to continue ignoring their advice and being a general jackass about it. But if you actually want to make tracks that people like, then the members of this forum have a lot to offer you, and you're ill-advised to ignore them.