The Song Fight Bulletin Board

by Ross Durand

Well I've been havin' some hard times lately, don'tcha know
How I'm gonna get through it, I didn't know
But I was sittin' here with these thoughts in my head
I remembered something my granny said
And I wondered if it could show me the way to go
CHORUS:
She said "Sonny, If you're lookin for a better day,
Open the Bible, Saint Peter'll show you the way."
"If you're looking for a better place than here,
open the Bible Saint Peter'll make it clear."

You know I've never been very much of a prayin' man
I can count the times I've been to church on one hand
But the way that things have been of late
I figure it may not be wise to wait
And I remembered what Granny said about a promised land

CHORUS

So I went and found me Granny's old Bible book
And I opened to the book of Peter to take a look
But a hole was cut right there instead
Filled with a grand of fresh green bread
And a plane ride to somewhere better is what I took.

CHORUS

St. Peter
by WreckdoM

St. Peter, booger eater
Sits around drinking in his wife beater
The Virgin Mary’s chin is hairy
She wants a man but they think she’s scary
St. John is smoking a bong
Passed out naked on the neighbor’s lawn
The Apostle Mark and Joan of Arc
Are getting it on at the trailer park
The Pope is good, the Pope is great
He fixed my toilet and cooked me a steak

Samples of Mrs. Judy O'Christian courtesy of http://www.landoverbaptist.org/LOL/lol.html