Come Down Where You Ought To Be

[TheTungstenSheik]

Come Down Where You Ought to Be - Tungsten Chic

Hey there baby, what's going on?
As you can see, I took the time to stop and mow my lawn.
I been up straightenin' the place since 'bout the crack o' dawn.
There been some other changes, too, ever since you been gone.
Yeah baby, you sure look fine,
Have yourself a glass o' wine,
'Cause I think it's just about time,
To come down where you ought to be.

Now girl, I know you told me no;
Baby, that was an awful long time ago.
I promise things is different now, it won't be like befo'.
Baby all I want is one more chance to let my people go.
It'll be all right, girl, I'll make sho',
Nobody else even got to know.
I got the lights turned way down low,
So come down where you ought to be.

Girl, I think you'd do best to make your way downstairs.
I know there's folk around, but there's no need to be so scared.
I'll bet you not a one of them even really cares.
And anyway, until you do, I ain't goin' no where.
So come on, baby, let's be fair.
I shaved off all my pubic hair.
Now stop pretending you're so scared,
And come down where you ought to be.

Oo
Yeah
Saxophone
Sax on the Beach!
Wacka chicka wauka chicka.
Hot sweaty sax.

Baby doll, I'm sure of it, the time has finally come,
To cut out all the games and get some downtown business done.
I'll take my belt off slowly, you can watch me count to one;
Sit back, relax your jaw, and you might start to have some fun.
No no, girl, no need to run.
I promise it won't hurt you none.
I'll be the dog, you be the bun,
And come down where you ought to be.

Now for some trumpet.
Sounds kinda like humpit.
I think you know what I'm talking about here.
Sweet sassy brassy.
For reals baby, I wrote you this whole song.
It's the least you could do.

When you get right down to it, it's not so much to ask,
And yet you keep on treating it like some exotic task.
It's not as though I'm asking if I can stick furniture in your ass.
Look, let's make this easier, have a sip out of this flask.
Now that's enough of all that sass;
If you start now, I'll be done fast.
And soon it will all be in the past.
Just come down where you ought to be.

[TheTungstenSheik]

I didn't submit this because I prioritized writing and recording for FAWM over recording this, but I was pretty happy with my lyrics, so here they are.

Dear Jon,

Upon hearing your plight, my associate Styop H. Quoons and I were most distressed. We felt bad that you'd managed to come up with lyrics you were proud of, but hadn't been able to record a song for the competition. It is, of course, now too late for it to be voted on this week, but all the same, we took it upon ourselves to write and record what, we suspect, must have been the song you yourself would have written had you had the opportunity. It is our hope that this track, which we think is really just the bee's knees, will in some small way alleviate the pain you no doubt felt at your exclusion. It is available for all to hear and enjoy at:
http://houseofgonads.f-sw.com/cdwyotb.mp3

Warmest Regards,
The Tungsten Sheik

[Teplin]

hahahaha! Brilliant! I'm voting for it in my heart, or possibly in one of the lower organs.

Was this an internet collaboration, or do you and The Right Honorable Bishop Quoons live close to each other?

[MisterQuoons]

Close is a relative term, but we live close enough to be able to be in the same room when we work together. Which is good, because one of the key components of most of our collaborations seems to be alcohol, and somehow getting drunk long-distance just isn't the same.