Sorry I hit you (with my car (Hope You're Okay Reviews))

[PipeFist]

Damn, I guess we had to make a true stinker eventually. Though the first one was, too. This is why we have avoided truly faked drums until now. Next time we will get a real drummer to hang out with us while we make the song. I have something potentially good in mind for next week.

[Poor June]

Damn, I guess we had to make a true stinker eventually. Though the first one was, too. This is why we have avoided truly faked drums until now. Next time we will get a real drummer to hang out with us while we make the song. I have something potentially good in mind for next week.

my suggestion if all else fails... just don't use drums... i for one wouldn't wanna add really offbeat drums to an alright track... and completely ruin it... not sayin' any of my stuff is that great anyways... but i'm just saying... that song you put in... wasn't all that bad... if all the off beat drums weren't in there... i would've enjoyed it much more... so if you ever have to choose... it doesn't take drums to make it a song... so feel free to send one in without if push comes to shove

[hoosenbergler]

Thank you for all the nice things people have said about my songs, and even the not so nice. I will post reviews soon.

[PipeFist]

my suggestion if all else fails... just don't use drums... i for one wouldn't wanna add really offbeat drums to an alright track... and completely ruin it... not sayin' any of my stuff is that great anyways... but i'm just saying... that song you put in... wasn't all that bad... if all the off beat drums weren't in there... i would've enjoyed it much more... so if you ever have to choose... it doesn't take drums to make it a song... so feel free to send one in without if push comes to shove

I totally get what you're saying. We actually considered taking them out altogether, but I stalwartly refused, because I wanted to have them bring the song back in right when Ash says, "Let's Go." You know, cause Ash is badass and deserves badass drums. Sadly, we could not provide him with any. It is stupid, because I even noticed while we were doing it, it sounded better without the drums. Live and learn, eh?

[gduncan]

Listening to the songs this week there seems to be a lot of high quality tracks. Did everyone get new toys for Christmas or something? Anyway, well done, it makes reviewing a more pleasant experience.

Gareth.

[Sober]

Thanks for the kind words guys. I'm not really satisfied with my vocals, at least not in the first verse. I think the last verse is about as good as my voice gets for this style.

As for the song length: The song is exactly as long as it's supposed to be.

And yes, the cheesy string solo was a horrible mistake. Vibes would have been way better.

Reviews to come later on tonight perhaps.

[jack]

pipefist
damn that is some horrid, ugly drum programming. drop that completely out and clap your hands instead. on second thought, skip the hand claps too. tap your foot. snap your fingers. the percussion mix on this makes it pretty much unlistenable for me.

sober
i like the piano the most of anything, and yet it seems to be mixed the lowest. go figure. as always, i appreciate and respect your diversity. even if you don't always nail it, you have the cajones to go for it. this is pretty good. trumpet is a nice touch. flute seems to be mixed sort of high, but it's well done too.

red sky hawk
nicely done. works for me on many levels. i like the verse much better than the chorus. the chorus seems to need a bit more dynamically to give it some oomph. dynamically, it goes almost pensive but i feel it lacks a certain amount of resolution. slick production, almost to the point of being too slick. but needless to say, it's extremely well done, and the singer is really excellent.

except after C
for what it is (a low fi recording of a 1/4/5 emo arrangement), you nail it.

r. mosquito
i wish when the ska stuff comes in, it came in louder. the fuzz is cool. that works. the other stuff just needs come up accordingly. i wish you'd wide panned the drums too. this is ok. points for the outside the box approach and arrangement.

glenn case
one of your biggest strengths i think is that you recognize what you are really good at musically and work it. in your case, you are a really solid singer, and you know how to use your vocals to carry a song, taking other things and using them to support that strength. the guitar and bass on this are fine, nothing special, and thats as it should be. you do really terrific arrangements and this is proof. your vocals really shine in this, set the tone for it, and ultimately make this a really solid song. excellent.

morbid morgan
this is kind of cool. definitely interesting. good singing and production. reminds me a bit of red sky hawks tune. it's very solid all around. nice job.

the cow exchange
definitely good in a frenetic sort of way. this is sweet. terrific singing!

points for trying
boy, i thought frank sounded like bowie. you give him a run for the title of bowiest songfighter.

fourty 4
i like the idea you were going for. for this kind of emo, you need swirly string pads and stuff. the distorted angsty part does absolutely nothing for me in terms of liking this more. just the opposite.

messiah
the slide guitar stuff is pretty cool. the vocal enunciation i hate. as good as that slide is, you should use it more sparingly as it sort of overtakes the mix. the way you sing it's hard to take it very seriously. the talent seems to be there, the whole thing just isn't gelling for me.

poor june
well, i'll jump on the bandwagon and agree that you seem to be getting better, especially production wise. i think the stapp comparisons come from the way you hold those baritone parts. personally, i don't see the comparison so much for the sound as much as the style. but i also think you have talent, play pretty damn good piano, and just need to find your zone vox and production wise to bring it all together. in the hands of the right producer, you could probably come up with something really tasty.

deshead
there's something to be said for knowing your way around a good pop hook. it still amazes me how much you and woodward sound alike. great stuff. sounds a bit overcompressed though. i dug that lead.

c. layne
steel drums is a nice plus. this is nice. like i said about glenn, you took a fairly straightforward and simple arrangement and made it interesting and your own. nice job. those steel drums work great for this.

dj brown star et al
sounds like you had fun. like the joke where you had to be there.

gareth duncan
hey, i like this! this is like good old late seventies / early eighties cock rock that i was weened on. this works well for me.

arts invisible
hm. well, this is pretty...short

hoosenbergler
the casio mix is awesome. i hate TTS. so you end with a C or something like that.

children of the devil
this has it's moments. if you'd kept it short, it would have worked better.

hedefine
i wrote this and worked up an arrangement and rough mix of this which i showed leaf and the hip cola. i love THC mixes so i asked if he would mix it for me and have leaf do the bass, which i think turned out really sweet and loopy. the name was taken in honor of leaf's friend who recently passed away. thanks again to leaf and the hip cola for their work on this, a real team effort that i'm really happy to be part of. you canucks rock.

[j$]

Reviews. I have a hangover so they'er shorter and more abstract than usual. IMO. Written as I listen.

Ants Invisible - Pleasant. Short. Pleasanty Short. A perfect intro on my stream, but can't say much more than that.

Children of the Devil -Musically sounds like The Fall (the backing track) sloppy vocally. Nice trumpets around 2.00. Overall I like the sound of it.

C Layne - Nice for 60s."Kill all Hippies". the Streel Drum patch is a weird choice but works well enough.

Cow Exchange - You see your clever alphabetical lyric completely passes by unnoticed in the vocal performance and therefore the point of the song is kind of lost. You should have used a speak 'n' spell.

Deshead - Hmmmm, I see a video with you driving a motorbike through the American Heartland, and a subplot of a girl who you love but can't tell. Lots of laughing, but also furtive glances. This may be a compliment!

Dj Brown Star - you keep your brown star to yourself! I like the wooahs. Point made by 1.30. The rest is an unneccessary slow build.

Except After C - Nice voice! This is a lovely song but needs a better defined chorus IMO.

Fourty4 - Nice mix / production - when the noise kicks in (nicely done) it's a little too squelchy for my ears but it is brilliantly used. Nicely and slightly madly restrained in a good way. Possible vote.

Gareth Duncan - Sounds absolutely the same as the Likely Lads to me. See all previous reviews. I like the way you say 'perfume'.

Glenn Case - how exactly do eyes cast shadows, Glenn? I wanted a mad deepvoiced MC to kick on a beat at :42. Other than that very pretty and nice tone on the acoustic.

Hedefine - great bass tone. The keys seem like the keyboard player was made to play from the street outside. It lacks meat around the mid-tone, but it's a very pleasant groove.

Hoosenbergler - I don't know what effect you're doing on your vocals, but I like it! Groovy! Kids music for adults! I like the lyric where I can make it out. 'You can break both my legs'? Possible vote.

me$$iah - The vocals could stand to be a bit louder. The music is less of an adventure than the last me$$iah song I heard, but for the CCR / blusy rock thing I like it. the phrasing goes a bit strange every now and then but you hold it together pretty much. The solo comes at just the right time, but maybe a bit of reverb on it?

Morbid Morgan - Or is it Jaimie Smith? I'm confused. Lyrically a little bit pompous. Very nice voice but you know that, the way it's pushed right up in the mix, I guess. More variety to the tune (not the vocal melody) would be welcome. You are goths and I claim my $5.

Pipefist - oh that percussion is bonkers. In fact the all over the place mix is annoying me, because the song is good, but I can't concentrate on it.

Points for Trying - Nice falsetto-ey bits. This reminds me of an endless number of bands from 1996-1999, the Longpigs for instance, but it's well done. The loose feel is charming here but occasionally it's a little distracting.

Poor June - You have been playing the same song for the last couple of weeks. Is that a preset on your keyboard or something?

Red Sky Hawk - Bored at 20 seconds, which is a bad sign. Pretty voice but it doesn't sound to me like you hope anything of the sort. You may be unlucky in the positioning in the stream in relation to my ADD however, so I will try and listen again before making any snap judgements.

RMosquito - Hmmm, starts like a Blondie pastiche ... when the vocal comes in, I like it a lot and then I realise it's inspired by Pulp. I like this a lot. Possible vote until I reached 1.45 when obviously it's too much like Franz Ferdinand and the Pulp and Blondie influence are theirs not yours. I love FF but this is toooooo much like them. No, overall this doesn't go anywhere fast enough for me. But not bad at all.

TSI - Nah, the vocals are ruining this for me (not something I often say about TSI songs.) As sloppy lounge goes it's a really nice tune. I'm not listening all the way to the end though.

My head hurts. That is all.

j$

[Poor June]

Poor June - You have been playing the same song for the last couple of weeks. Is that a preset on your keyboard or something?

sarcasm... isn't it lovely?... *$&%*^&@(@)(*%&^ prick

[j$]

Poor June - You have been playing the same song for the last couple of weeks. Is that a preset on your keyboard or something?

sarcasm... isn't it lovely?... *$&%*^&@(@)(*%&^ prick

Child.

[Poor June]

Poor June - You have been playing the same song for the last couple of weeks. Is that a preset on your keyboard or something?

sarcasm... isn't it lovely?... *$&%*^&@(@)(*%&^ prick

Child.

good enough point

[djbsbkc]

actually the ponit is only made once you have suffered through the whole thing.. he he he

[Mostess]

Vibes would have been way better.

That would have been cool. But make no mistake, this entry is tops. Great songwriting, through and through. Major sevenths are underused these days.

I love the extended notes connecting phrases ("last time we spoke..." feels almost gut-wrenchingly long). The staccato bits define the ends of the verses very well for me. Putting the chorus before the instrumental verses works very well, letting the title linger in my ears while the instruments pine away on the sentimental verse melody. I got through six minutes because there's surprisingly little repetition (the sung chorus only happens three times, there are only three verses of lyrics, and the third sounds different coming after the modulation so it seems more like a bridge to the coda). The lyrics are evocative and any cheesiness is thouroghly drowned out by the sappy style, which you commit to unflinchingly well.

Plus, the recording is stellar, especially the drums. I feel like I'm listening to a live group at a club (albeit a group with some magical triple flute player). Any sloppiness in the singing or playing only adds to that illusion. But screw the technical crap, this would be a killer song if you had just put your portable tape recorder on the piano.

This entry makes me very happy. Killer writing, Mr. Irishman. My vote goes here without question.

[Jim of Seattle]

OK, here's the thing: Sometimes it's hard working up the energy to do reviews, not because the songs are bad, but because a lot of songs just leave me with nothing to say. They're fine and all, and I enjoy them usually, it's just I find myself straining to come up with something new to say about them. Those songs usually get reviews like "This is nice. Doesn't send me to the moon or anything, but performed nicely and recorded well. Lacks a distinctive specialness." or something along those lines. So…. I'm going to be lumping those songs into a category all their own at the bottom. If your song gets in that category, don't take it as criticism. It's not you, it's me. I just can't come up with anything to say about it. I could work hard to come up with something, but a) it wouldn't be that great, and b) it's too much work, making me less likely to do reviews at all. If your song sucks, rest assured I'll have something to say about it.

Favorites in blue

Ants (Invisible)
Shortsong.

<font color=blue>C Layne
Really pleasant. Nicely done harmonies. This is a total package. Good writing, good production, it's like, you know, a real song. Has kind of a McCartney & Wings feel to it.</font>

<font color=blue>DJ Brown Star and the Baloon Knot Collective
Spell-check your band name before you submit. Starts off very WreckdoM, but there's a song in there, I can hear it. I'm sort of thinking this might be pretty good, but I can't tell if it's good or terrible. Question is, could I listen to a whole album of this? Maybe. It's certainly original, and not entirely unsuccessful. You know, this sounds like total chaos, but it isn't really. There's definite organization here. The thing is, a lot of people try this kind of this and lose control. This never loses control. It's actually kind of cool. Next time, I'd make sure all the ambient random noises can be distinguished. It's like you're trying to do Jackson Pollack, but too often your colors get mixed up and it turns out gray. Thanks for an interesting few minutes, though.</font>

Children of the Devil
Oh yeah. <font color=blue>I love</font>/hate this. REVIEW A: <font color=blue>Man, there's a lot of creativity here. Lots of tracks and lots of different sounds and, well, a ton of work behind this. I like how you have total disregard for normal tonality, but it still hangs together. There's a lot of musicality here for it being so ostensibly ugly. Good work.</font> REVIEW B: I was shocked to look down and see it was only 4 minutes long. Seemed much longer. The lyrics are Adam Sandler-like stringings together of the-first-thing-you-thought-of rhymes, which get annoying, plus I can't understand a lot of them. Pick a song and go with it.

<font color=blue>Cow Exchange
Very pop. Reminds me of the theme to "Friends". So the song doesn't give you a lot of street cred, but who needs street cred when you have a song that can make you a big wad of cash like this one? Is that pitch-correction in there? Man, it's become so pervasive in music that it sounds like a stylistic choice as much as a pitch correction tool. Anyway, fantastic job.</font>

deshead
Yikes, "unfurled" and "world" is a lame rhyme. Nothing rhymes with world. At least, nothing that doesn't stick out as painfully obvious. Once you said "unfurled" I was like "Uh-oh, here comes 'world'…". Sorry, that's snobby. Anyway, this song is very very competent pop. I should shut up about "world" because this is really good.

Fourty4
I was already to make this one blue, but then the distorted middle section came in. It's short, and the rest of the song is really quite lovely. But that distorted stuff kind of wrecks it. Still, I'm not going to hold it against you very much. I like this a lot.

<font color=blue>Glenn Case
Is there nothing you can't do? I love that second chord in the verse. I can't figure it out. I think you're staying on the IV with a VII in the bass? Anyway, whatever. This is really nicely done. I only got to hear it once because my computer audio freaked out, but as usual I dig your creative chord progressions, and your sensitive vocals are spot-on. If I got to hear it again I'd comment on the lyrics. Ties for my favorite this fight.</font>

<font color=blue>Hedefine
Is this Jack Shite? If so, this is about my favorite out-of-character song you've done. I like when you try new things, though usually they aren't successful by my reckoning. This one works. I usually don't like talking songs, but there's a lot of character in the delivery, and it fits well with the lyrics, so it works. And the instrumental atmosphere is consistent and polished. Kewl, man.</font>

[n]Hoosenbergler[/b]
"Jeffrey, stop using the carnival PA system to try to promote your music career! You're fired!"

Jami Smith
This is very good. I especially like the arrangement, and the production is so smooth. My problem with this song is that the lead vocal line isn't very interesting. She's a great singer, of course, but she doesn't have a terribly engaging melody to sing. Reminds me a lot of the Eurhythmics in that way (good singer given dull tunes to sing). But everything else comes together nicely, and for people who aren't so interested in the melody for its own sake, this is a total winner.

Messiah
Very bouncy. I get pretty tired of the single note tune on the single chord. The chorus changes it up a bit, but not enough for me. If I were in a bar with a couple beers and you came on and did this song I'd be all into it, but it doesn't have enough stuff going on for me to hold onto when sober in my cubicle.

Pipefist
The kick drum anticipates the beat enough to be really distracting, I think. If I ignore that, I like the writing, and I am jealous of your vocals. The zombie line sticks out, isn't really in the character of the rest of the song, by my reckoning.

<font color=blue>Points For Trying
Yum. That opening falsetto leap is very exciting, and then you follow it up with an unexpected couple of chords. I'm yours from then on, potentially. And you don't disappoint. I love this. I like the ambitious vocal line, and how you nail it but in a seemingly effortless way. Going immediately into my SF favorites playlist.</font>

Poor June
I've said this before: You have a talent for catchy little pieces, always with a heartfelt soulful feel to them. Where you struggle is in execution. The recording quality is much better than it used to be, but your voice has pitch troubles. You've improved tremendously since you started here, though, and you're a few tweaks away from being a consistent contender.

<font color=blue>Sober Irishman
How late-Bacharach of you. There's certainly a lot to pay attention to here. I love the arrangement, and all the instruments are played well. This sounds like something I might try to do if I had real instruments at my disposal. In any case, I'd love to cover this someday. I think perhaps your vocals are a little somber and heavy for the song, and there's too much brush cymbal for my taste, but those are quibbles. Good job.</font>


<font color=green>NICE, BUT NOTHING TO SAY</font>

Except After C
Gareth Duncan
R Mosquito
Red Skyhawk feat Jill Bari


WINNER: Points For Trying tied with Glenn Case

[soda]

Reviews, eh? Here we go:

<b>Ants (Invisible)</b> This was kinda cool. Very short, but shows a lot of promise. Make a full-length song next time!

<b>Children of the Devil</b> I think a couple of people already expressed the same opinion, but I'll reinforce: I was kind of "enh" until the rapping, then was interested, and then the stuff after the main rap part was kinda cool. Production was pretty much crap, though. Good work, but plenty of room to keep improving.

<b>C Layne</b> Wow, it started off sounding like something from the Super Mario Sunshine soundtrack. Steel drum madness! This song's okay, but I kinda got distracted by a shiny object during it and you lost me. Not a bad song, but not a fantastic one.

<b>Cow Exchange</b> I'm really sorry, but I found this song kind of generic (not Generic). If it had been much more than 2:00 long I probably would have had some nasty comment for you.

<b>Des Head</b> I'm not a fan of the delivery. Or the lyrics or the production. Sorry. I'm moving on.

<b>DJ Brown Star</b> This kind of reminds me of some of the more chaotic tracks on the first Beta Band album. It's kinda cool-- although I wonder about the whole "write a song related to the title" thing, it's just a nice listen.

<b>Except After C</b> Could use some better production, since I could barely hear you, but it's a nice song. Simple, but you have a good voice and the guitar playing is good as well.

<b>forty4</b> The bass drum sounds a little muffled. It starts off all right and when it changes the distortion is kinda awful. There might be a good song here, but I can't tell underneath the clipping.

<b>Gareth Duncan</b> This is pretty good. "Jesus school?" I like your delivery and the backing is okay, although the drums are kind of bland. They're in the back, though. It's a nice song and it needs more bass.

<b>Glenn Case</b> It's pretty simple, and it's a lot like some of your other slow songs, but as always the harmonies are fantastic and the whole performance is just... solid. Excellent.

<b>Hedefine</b> The beat is very nice. The vocals are interesting, and if I get a chance to really give this a listen again sometime soon I'd like to do that, but there are people in the room demanding my attention and math homework that I should be doing... but you've piqued my interest, jack.

<b>Hoosenbergler</b> This is SO COOL. I'm hanging on to this.

<b>Messiah</b> Bleh. The singing is weird but not in a good way. Guitar solo is kinda cool, the whole mix is a little flat like the diet mountain dew in front of me.

<b>Morbid Morgan</b> The production on this is alright, although the vocals seem kind of out of place with the rest of the track. Too much of the echo effect? You have a nice voice and the music is pleasant. Good job.

<b>Pipefist</b> Drums are pretty bad. Not only do they sound like really generic drums, they definitely get out of sync with the rest of the song. A couple points for clever lyrics. And really, I am a sucker for the zombies.

<b>Points For Trying</b> I don't think you sound like Bowie at all, but you sound pretty good. I'm not a jangly guitar fan. Drums are lost. Good song, could use some balance in the production department.

<b>Poor June</b> Poor June indeed. I hope you're okay. But yeah. Keep working. Get along, try again.

<b>Red Sky Hawk</b> The vocals seem a little overdone, and I'm not even sure that they're that much more dramatic than Morbid Morgan's... I guess it's a fine line there. This song just kind of bored me. It was like something from a mediocre indie musical or something, and then the solo in the middle sounded like the fucking Weather Channel.

<b>R. Mosquito</b> Cool. It's a fun song, well produced and it's catchy. Not fantastic, not mediocre. Good track.

<b>Sober Irishman</b> This is kinda cool. Vocals aren't quite what I want, but it works. Nice song.

I'm voting for Hoosenbergler and keeping it, along with Glenn, R. Mosquito, and TSI. I owe Hedefine, Morbid Morgan, and Children of the Devil another listen.

[deshead]

Nothing rhymes with world. At least, nothing that doesn't stick out as painfully obvious. Once you said "unfurled" I was like "Uh-oh, here comes 'world'…". Sorry, that's snobby.

It's not snobby. But the pedant in me has to point out "curled", "twirled", and without much of a stretch "pearl" and "girl", all of which can be used non-obviously, and none of which I even considered 'cause "unfurled" was the right word.

[Caravan Ray]

...and hurled

[Sober]

Squirreled, if you can metaphorize the noun into a verb.

[Jim of Seattle]

My point was not that there aren't words that rhyme, because of course there are. I was saying that when I heard "unfurled", it stuck out, and I was pretty sure "world" was coming 'round the bend.

[deshead]

when I heard "unfurled", it stuck out, and I was pretty sure "world" was coming 'round the bend.

D'oh. Ya, I hate that in songs myself. Nothin' pulls me out of a song faster than being reminded there's a writer behind it.

I must re-record with "squirreled" as the lyric. In hindsight, the choice should have been obvious.

[Caravan Ray]

I'm having trouble imagining what sort of bastardised version of English you people are speaking where "squirrelled" rhymes with "world". Doesn't "squirrelled" rhyme with "Jim Tyrrelled"?

[c.layne]

<b>C Layne</b> Wow, it started off sounding like something from the Super Mario Sunshine soundtrack. Steel drum madness! This song's okay, but I kinda got distracted by a shiny object during it and you lost me. Not a bad song, but not a fantastic one.

a shine sprite, perhaps?