September 10th 2011

[BBABM]

So I speak pretty decent kitchen Spanish. I can get you extra dressing all day, you need cucumbers for something, wham! Pepino on that ass. I feel pretty confident that I could get around a Spanish speaking country just fine. I do not speak one lick of French. I went to Paris, and literally couldn't understand one word spoken to me.

QotD: do you speak a second language?

QotD2: any funny language barrier stories?

One time I was waiting in a Chinese take out for my food when a group of Latino construction workers come in. The lady behind the register spoke well enough, but her English was thickly accented. The hilarity that I bared witness to can not really be described, as the leader of this group (who didn't really speak English at all) tried to communicate several orders of beef and broccoli to this woman who was trying her best. Finally giving up, she goes in back and pulls up a Latino line cook to take the order. I had received my food halfway through this ordeal, and was just sitting there to watch.

[fluffy]

qotd: I can understand smatterings of Spanish, French, Italian, and Japanese, although for the first ones I do better if it's written down. (I am basically illiterate in Japanese so it doesn't help much unless it's written in Romaji.)

qotd2: I was at a Shakey's Pizza in Tokyo with a coworker. Coworker and I only knew little tiny bits of Japanese, and the waitress knew no English. I tried to apologize for the language difficulties by saying "ごめんなさい" (gomen nasai) which I had learned by watching way too much anime. The waitress got very embarrassed and laughed like crazy. Later I learned that ごめんなさい is a very informal apology that you use only with people who are very familiar to you, like your sister or girlfriend. (A more formal and neutral apology is "すみません" (sumimasen) which literally means "I didn't get away with it.")

Also, one time in Spanish class in college, the instructor asked me if I liked her, and I brainfarted and replied "te quiero" (I want you) instead of "me gustas" (I like you, or a bit more literally "you please me").

Oh, and when I was buying a condominium in Seattle, someone with a heavy accent that I couldn't quite place called me to verify some paperwork-related thing or another. She kept on shortening it to "condom" instead of "condo."

[king_arthur]

A few words in Spanish, but not enough to actually communicate with anyone.

However, my funny foreign languages story: when I was getting my Interdisciplinary Arts and Performances degree from Arizona State University a few years ago, it turned out that you had to have some foreign language credits to graduate. However, the adviser told me, "current computer languages" count as a foreign language, I think the official rule was "two consecutive semesters of a current computer language." Well, I couldn't quite meet that, but I showed her the list of language classes I had taken, and she decided that two of my classes were close enough to count.

So I officially met my "foreign language" requirement at ASU in 2006 because I know Cobol and Fortran. Or used to, anyway...

Charles (KA)

[Paco Del Stinko]

I could survive in Germany, but not converse, by any means. Many years ago I worked with a fella from The Dominican Republic. He was a good guy but had some struggles with English. His best lines: "Why you are so homo?" , "Aw, you smell like a ghost!" and my fave, "Never mind your own business!"

[Caravan Ray]

However, the adviser told me, "current computer languages" count as a foreign language,

OMG. You USA people really are savages, aren't you.

[RangerDenni]

apparently, in Israel, the word for lighter is easy to mess up with a friendly recreational pastime which is embarrassing to talk about during a theological discussion over coffee and cigs. The mistake becomes all to clear when clarified with hand gesture and accompanying furtive head jiggle. Chagrin ensued.
very unfortunately timed mistake on my part. have since forgotten all of the language I learned over a decade ago but can sing a psalm in Russian because of missionary work.
I can also sing a song in Portuguese about a brunette flower.. but that is a story for another time
The odd skills we pick up...

[nyjm]

QotD: 1) duh. 2) I'm still passingly proficient in Russian and pretty good in American Sign Language. I've been to Germany enough to get by, mostly by apologizing and asking if they speak either English or French.

Difficulty with language moments are my whole professional life as students stumble through things. Fun moments: When asked about her pastimes, a student once tried to say "I go horseback riding" (Je fais du cheval) but flubbed the pronunciation so bad it came out Je vole des cheveaux ("I steal horses.") The French verb for "to take" is prendre, but when used with people, it often connotes sexual activity. So is the past tense form of the verb savoir, (to know facts or have skills). O.o So, when my students try to talk about taking their friends places or getting to know someone, I often learn more than I bargain for about their (supposed) carnal activities...

[Billy's Little Trip]

Only English and Spanish for me. But does it count as 3 that I fluently understand my mother yelling at me in German? Strange that I don't sprechen Sie Deutsch even though I understand and can answer my mother when she forgets to speak English to me.

[Caravan Ray]

QotD: do you speak a second language?

I used to speak French. I studied it for 5 years at school, at the highest level for my leaving certificate - and also did a year of it at University (a High Distinction in French 1 as an elective was the main thing that helped me scape in with an overall pass for my Engineering Degree!) - but have forgotton most of it now. Except for a couple of trips to New Caledonia - I never really used it full on, but I was quite fluent 20 years ago. Best thing I ever did though. Learning French improved my English enormously. And it totally works with the chicks. I have written a song in French (badly - "Les Anchois" - Noah, I keep meaning to get you to correct my grammar for me. I know it is wrong - but it is one of my favorite songs I have written - I'd like to correct it one day).

I also learnt a fair bit of Bahasa Indonesian in preparation for a trip there in the early 90s. I travelled through the backblocks of Sumatara and Java and knew enough to get by - but far from fluent.

And I could also get by in I-Kiribati - having lived in Kiribati for 2 years. Didn't need it on the main island Tarawa, where most people spoke some English, and English was the language of government (I worked for the government) - but on the outer atolls where I spent a lot of time, English was rare. It was a diabolically hard language to learn - I learnt very little

QotD2: any funny language barrier stories?

Only one that springs to mind is more an accent thing that happened to my parents. They used to host Japanese students in their house in Queensland - the kids would stay in Aus for a few weeks with an Aus family learning English. One time my parents were sent a 50 year old businessman who wanted to improve his English. First morning, my Mum said to him in her broad Australian accent - "Gday Johnno - where do you want to go today?" ( Mum and Dad, upon meeting him decided to give him an Australian name - "Johnno"). Johnno apparantly looked quite confused and mumbled something about going back to his family in Japan. They found out later that what Johnno thought Mum had asked him was "Where do you want to go to die?". He found it a disturbing question to be asked cheerily over breakfast.

[Caravan Ray]

...on further thought - I recall my first night in Indonesia - on the tiny island of Batam that I had arrived at by ferry from Singapore. the taxi driver taking me to a hotel asked if I would like him to get me a "live blanket". I figured my accom would have linen so that would not be necessary. I found out later a "live blanket" was a woman. D'oh!!! I also recall spending most of that first night naked on a cold concrete floor expelling fluids from most of my major orifices expecting to die at any moment. i probably could have used that live blanket, though I may not have gotten my money's worth.

[HeuristicsInc]

these are funny. i imagine i have some stories that i am not coming up with now.

i learned spanish in high school. i have been reading a story in spanish to my 2-year-old and i understand the gist of it. that's not too bad.
after i met my wife, we learned german for a couple of years. german is pretty challenging. we knew enough to get by on the second half of our honeymoon in 2005, but i have forgotten too much now.
then we switched to italian. i'm pretty good with my italian.
also cram-learned a bit of french before we went there a few years ago. *barely* got by on that.
-bill