the last review of a song etc. (the last afternoon reviews)

[Emperor Gum]

@signboy: So would I, my bad.

@dirgetheband

Interesting, it was arranged as an instrumental solo and does use a different chord progression than the rest of the song. I think my mistake was in the mix, if I push the violins to the fore during the 2nd and 3rd parts of the intro so they act as a clear solo it could fix that. Hm, or I could put a vocal part over the top perhaps? Thanks for the feedback!

'You had Time' is a lovely song, great intro! Maybe its just the music I listen to, but I don't consider either song you mentioned to have a long intro. '31 Songs' looks interesting, I'll stick it on the Christmas list!
-Graham

[jast]

I haven't reviewed in a while. Many of you guys I don't think I've listened to before. Hi! If all those numbers don't make sense, have a look at my signature. I'm a fairly critical listener... if I don't have a lot to complain about in your song, that's a big compliment from me. Also some scores might be higher than the text of the review would have made you think... that means I can't put my finger on what makes your song good, or it was something very straightforward. Sorry if that's not too helpful. If you want more details, just ask.

Berkeley Social Scene: Hey, a BSS arrangement that I actually like (minus the slightly sloppy playing in some places). Melody in the chorus feels like it doesn't go anywhere, though... and the vocals get a bit weak there. Background vocals don't fit themselves into the mix very well. Perhaps try reducing the highs a bit. Very nice solo sound. This isn't going to become one of my favourite songs, but everything fits together well and it just needs a bit more love in the performance department.
C:3 L:* F:3 P:2 M:3 Total: 13/15

bgm: The style sounds pretty generic but the slightly unusual major-minor progressions nicely make up for that. Great arrangement/development, rounded off with a great mix. I have two complaints, though (surprise!). Number one: the melody isn't very exciting and there is no chorus to distract me from that. Number two: it's fairly hard to stay engaged in a song that is pretty much whispered all the way through. More contrast please! By the way, this is by far the most expansive treatment of "he only thought he knew" I've listened to so far (note that I'm not listening to songs in the order listed here). Nice.
C:2 L:3 F:2 P:2 M:3 Total: 12/15

Billy & The Psychotics: Well thanks for delivering the rockness I expected. You might want to boost the softer (dare I say weaker) parts of the vocals in the mix. In the chorus, the guitars totally overshadow the vocals. Needs more mix magic. Pitch is a little bit unstable in the verses. Nice song with weaknesses in the execution.
C:3 L:3 F:3 P:2 M:2 Total: 13/15

c.layne: Not sure if I like the slight high-end distortions on the drum kit that go all the way through. I definitely don't like the composition, but that's just me. I was just about to complain about the sparse arrangement and then you go and fix it by adding rhythm guitar. Nice. Aww, and it's gone again. The whistly synth gets a bit annoying after a while. I want to find more to complain about but there isn't anything. Curses! I do like the more noticeable distortions later on, by the way, just so we're clear.
C:3 L:* F:2 P:3 M:3 Total: 13/15

Dejected Motives: Horribly out of tune, and even your pitch fixing plugin doesn't fix the wobbliness of the vocals. Arrangement is a bit sparse for my taste. Suddenly vocals are way up front, what the eff? Fix your levels! The out-of-tune thing makes this very hard to listen to for me. Bailed out at 1:30.
C:2 L:* F:1 P:1 M:2 Total: 8/15

Dirge: Please don't bury your vocals like this (especially in the beginning). Even if they suck... but now they're buried so much that I'm having a hard time telling whether they do. Well, I guess there are some sour notes. And the lyrics... either I'm just too dense for them, or they are pretty stupid. The distorted part comes out of left field and the vocals in that part are, frankly, pretty bad. Sorry, this didn't appeal to me at all.
C:2 L:1 F:2 P:2 M:2 Total: 9/15

DJ Ranger Den: A little bit of compression on the vocals, please? You can't switch back and forth between connected and unconnected vocals and hope that dynamics will somehow work out by themselves. There is such a thing as too much dynamics. I'm just gonna guess that the performance was pretty good, and that only leaves me to say that I don't think just because you're writing a G&G song you have to make the composition this repetitive. I do like a few variations along the way to keep things interesting.
C:2 L:3 F:2 P:3 M:2 Total: 12/15

Emperor Gum: Might wanna tune your instruments relative to each other a bit better. Or perhaps you're just not a violin god yet? Props for trying this, though. Vocals stick out like a sore thumb, probably mostly due to mic/room. Might be possible to fix some of this with EQ; especially by reducing some of the highs. I think you could have made the intro a bit shorter... the arrangement is very decent but not so compelling that it can stand on its own for very long. Protip: open your mouth (that includes separating tongue/palate) before you start recording. Not a great song but a great experiment, and keep on doing that!
C:3 L:* F:2 P:2 M:2 Total: 11/15

Future Boy: I thought you already had me in the bag with that piano... but then those lead vocals with that crappy room sound. Aww. It's okay in the louder part, but there's still way too much unconnected vocals in this song. Excellent ambient stuff. Interesting composition. That's a fairly literal lyrical take on the title, but well done. If not for the vocals, this would be an easy win for you. This way it's just an ordinary vote.
C:3 L:3 F:2 P:2 M:3 Total: 13/15

Hip Hop Anonymous: Congrats, you've discovered reverby piano. Still left to discover: cohesive-sounding mix (in general, bathing the backing in reverb and keeping the lead comparably dry doesn't help with that). Delivery sounds a bit ridiculous. I guess I can stand that once, but probably not going to listen to that again. Thanks for making the backing track quite a bit less boring than many others trying the rap thing here.
C:3 L:* F:2 P:3 M:2 Total: 12/15

Klownhole: Guitar performance seems pretty sloppy. Vocals are pretty mumbly. Composition gets pretty boring/tiresome after a while. Harmonies are pretty weird. Note that despite my using the word "pretty" a lot, that word doesn't accurately represent my personal verdict. At least it sounds authentic. And the mix is good enough.
C:2 L:* F:2 P:2 M:3 Total: 11/15

Life in Decibels: When the drums and the instrument thingy start, it's a weird departure from the intro. Kind of arbitrary. Vocals are somewhat buried in the mix behind that synthy thing that does the octaves. The whole mix sounds a bit distant. Wimpy vocals... give 'em a bit more juice! Man, that octave-jumping gets boring. I'm missing chords. I think there's a very, very subtle pad in the background of some parts that does chords, but for my taste that's not enough. In short, the mix and arrangement (and, to some extent, the development) don't blend together all too well. The core of the song isn't bad, but it kind of loses a lot in execution.
C:2 L:* F:2 P:2 M:2 Total: 10/15

Mom&Data: Wow that's a boring bass line. And then you go and draw extra attention to it by making it go against the organ. Not terribly smart IMO. I don't like the composition for its complete lack of resolution. I don't like the whispery vocals all the way through, either. I do like the arrangement, and the development is perfect (except the whole thing could have stood to be a bit shorter or have some extra section). The snare is a bit extreme sometimes. Pretty mixed bag for me, but mostly well executed.
C:2 L:* F:2 P:3 M:3 Total: 12/15

Paco del Stinko: Wow, this is harsh... in a good way. I think I would have backed it up quite a bit after a few measures, though. Also it almost obstructs your vocals (that it doesn't completely is a sign you're actually pretty good at mixing). Signature Paco composition. With less harshness (or, perhaps, more 'flexible') this would have been a definite vote. Great ending.
C:3 L:3 F:1 P:3 M:2 Total: 12/15

Pigfarmer Jr: Are you trying to make this annoying? Because you definitely succeeded. Between the monotonous speaking and the extremely aggressive kick, the chorus doesn't do enough stuff to make up for that. Clipping is not a good thing, by the way. This song feels way longer than it is. Not a good thing in this case.
C:1 L:2 F:1 P:1 M:2 Total: 7/15

Ripping Hammer: Pity point for double .mp3 extension (not included in totals). I find the strings a bit... loopy. That is to say, the looping is quite audible in the sample. Not a huge fan of that. Pretty great mix and arrangement. Not a huge fan of the vocals, either (not sure if it's because of the effects or because of the performance itself), also you might wanna bring them up a bit more in the mix because they're a bit hard to make out. Appropriately short. Overall, nicely done.
C:3 L:* F:3 P:2 M:3 Total: 13/15

sonofsupercar: Hey, if you put speaking in the background, at least make it intelligible. I have no real complaints here, except the mix sounds a bit dull and the song never stops being very in-your-face plus the whole melody is pretty much just a single note. I would have wished for a bit of a change somewhere. Something to keep things interesting. The way it is, it makes the solos hard to stomach, even though on its own I guess it's pretty damn cool.
C:2 L:* F:2 P:3 M:3 Total: 12/15

Sportswriters: I agree with those who preferred the drumless version. I think you could have made it work with drums, perhaps with a different kit, mixed differently. In my ears the snare drum is too present. I might have chosen one with less "crack". Also some of the snare build-ups have a bit of a laggy feeling. Vocals are a bit too polished for my taste, at least for this kind of song. Sounds like you never really "sing out". I think some of that would have added a whole new level of depth. All in all, however, that's a pretty great song. In particular, excellent storytelling.
C:3 L:3 F:3 P:2 M:3 Total: 14/15

T.C.Elliott: The mix is pretty uncohesive... the vocals stick out like a sore thumb (less so during the part that has some reverb). Some sharp notes in the vocals, and the timing isn't quite as tight as I think it should be. I find the guitar/drums pretty boring. Nice subtle use of delay on the guitar. Good structure overall, nice lyrics.
C:2 L:3 F:2 P:2 M:2 Total: 11/15

Wicked Cripple feat. dont reply: For me to like a hyperactive song, it has to be extremely great. Your song isn't. It's boring. And stupid. Even if your delivery is fairly good (though perhaps overdoing it), that's not enough to save you.
C:1 L:* F:1 P:2 M:3 Total: 9/15

[Pigfarmer Jr]

TC Elliott – You’re Pigfarmer, right? This is like an electronic version of the songs you usually do, but much better. Is this about a vampire? Sleep all day, light of the moon, etc. This is a good tune. Going to half time with the drums for the chorus is a nice touch, provides a definite separation between verse and chorus. Good work on this one.

Yes and yes. If I had a way to do drums then I'd be doing more rock instead of GnG stuff. Although I like GnG stuff fine. This week I was playing with toys more than anything, but I liked this song okay.

[Pigfarmer Jr]

And our ears have gotten used to that, so now we are much more pitch sensitive than we were.

Brian Henneman of the Bottle Rockets made mention of this very fact. Some of his favorite songs from the 70's are definitely pitchy, but he never noticed until every track on the radio was nearly perfectly in tune. If my ears were better, I might be able to tell.. or maybe I just don't care.

[frankie big face]

"bands like Mike and the Mechanics" , that's mean man, why not say Genesis? That way you can still call me cheesy but I feel like I've been complimented. Or better yet call us GTR, were more like a GTR on this one. A little Ray Davies is a huge compliment, I hope Lunk thinks so too.

Thanks for the review! When's the next Big Face submission?

Yes, GTR absolutely! Hopefully soon on the new FBF. It's on my mind.

[frankie big face]

Yes, there's an accented kick on 1 & 4. If you're not getting that it will make no sense.

The original groove is

Code: Select all

S . . . x . . . . . . x . . .
K X . . . x . X . x . . . . . 

The amended groove is

Code: Select all

S . . . . x . . . . . . x . . 
K X . . x . . X . x . . . . . 

If you have to spend this much time explaining your groove, maybe it's just the groove and not the listeners? Just sayin'...

[frankie big face]

I agree 100%. I'm thinking Jeff Buckley and early Sarah McLachlan, especially Jeff's "Everybody Here Wants You" and Sarah's "Witness". Neither song really has some hook that grabs your attention like a slap in the face. But they both dig in, and holy hell, do they ever dig deep, like a tumor or an addiction. I think the question I used to ask is "who's bed are they going to be in other than mine." I've always been a bit pessimistic, I guess, and that probably comes across as fairly obvious in my tunes. Hrumph.

Okay, but what those two artists have in spades is charisma (well...maybe not Sarah McLachlan, but she's a good singer). If either one of the artists I cited as needing hooks could perform like Jeff Buckley, I probably wouldn't have made that comment. Hell, if either could perform like Denni, I probably wouldn't have made it. Maybe me saying they needs hooks is a nice way of saying the song is boring. But that's not really what I meant--I said what I meant. I don't think every song needs a hook; I think those two songs need hooks (one each).

[frankie big face]

The danger of hooks is that when you zoom in you find a lot of the time they're just a V-I cadence with lipstick, which is about as interesting as a lukewarm cup of tea..

Oh please...

[sportswriters]

If you have to spend this much time explaining your groove, maybe it's just the groove and not the listeners? Just sayin'...

I know it's the freakin' groove. WHY it's not working is what I'm trying to figure out.

If that's okay with you.

[frankie big face]

If you have to spend this much time explaining your groove, maybe it's just the groove and not the listeners? Just sayin'...

I know it's the freakin' groove. WHY it's not working is what I'm trying to figure out.

If that's okay with you.

Haha. Okay, calm down. I think you're just trying to put a square peg into a round hole. You said something early about people not "getting" (not quoting, just air-quoting) odd meters right away. We're not idiots. I grew up on odd meters and glennny only eats 15/16 of every meal in an apparent homage to Steve Vai's "Little Green Men." To me, the song just screams 6/8. But I understand--songwriters are stubborn, especially pedantic music theory snob songwriters. Like you and me!

EDIT: I think some of the problem has to do with where the stress falls in the lyric. It seems to be at odds with the drums. Okay with just the guitar at the beginning.

[frankie big face]

Dirge – This song suffers from too many maladies to list in a short review. Keep trying—sounds like you have potential.

Can you list three of them? I'm a big boy, I can take it.

Okay, but remember this is just my opinion.

• I think the lyrics are really weak. The line about "retarded and stupid" in this context comes off as comical, almost. This is a really moody song and those words just seem really awkward. Is this an actual letter?
• The vocals are uneven in volume, buried much of the time and then suddenly loud.
• The guitar solo sounds like it's being played in the wrong key for some time. Then it sort of comes around.

That's three. I actually think you have a nice mood going on here. I don't think the rocked up section add anything, really. I'd scrap the lyrics, but keep the concept and write an adaptation of the letter that is...well, better. And then decide on a melody to sing and sing it better.

[sportswriters]

Over on music.mefi we dissected it a bit further. I have a really bad habit of playing and singing ahead of the beat. In the second verse (I checked the files) both the vocal and the piano (and the guitar to a certain extent) are playing ahead of the beat. Bringing up the drums 1/48 note brought it right into time and it sounded a lot better. That's why the fills sound laggy. In the later verses I quantized the piano more heavily and you can hear the kick, so the drums start to drive the song instead of accompanying it. The real solution is to play live drums instead of programming them I think. I have a cheap electronic kit here and when I learned the groove and played it in, it sounded just fine. It's just hard to do that in an odd metre against the clock.

I appreciate the comments on the drums. They sounded completely fine to me so it was hard for me to understand what was bothering people. I had and have a very particular sound in mind for the song which involved those drums so although dropping them is a fix, it only cures the problem in the sense that death cures everything. I still think the groove is the right one -- at least it sounds right to me and when I sit down at the kit it feels natural -- but you need to hear the kick, so it probably isn't appropriate in the 2nd verse, and it needs to be really tight with the vocal as you say.

[blue]

I heard a bunch of you say you wanted to remix the sos tune. Here are the raw tracks, nicely lined up and ready to roll.

http://www.sonofsupercar.com/music/sono ... tracks.zip

[jack]

I heard a bunch of you say you wanted to remix the sos tune. Here are the raw tracks, nicely lined up and ready to roll.

http://www.sonofsupercar.com/music/sono ... tracks.zip

is there a bpm or approximation other than "the meter in blue's head"?

[Mr. Car]

I heard a bunch of you say you wanted to remix the sos tune. Here are the raw tracks, nicely lined up and ready to roll.

http://www.sonofsupercar.com/music/sono ... tracks.zip

Oh Horrors!!! My raw voice exposed!!!
Good luck with that.

[Dejected_Motives]

Unlike my other submissions, the ONLY use of autotune was in the chorus. The levels were higher than they should have been because my last submission was too muffled/quiet. And I had a feeling the guitar parts were too busy and contrasting. Maybe I will try a submission with no autotune whatsoever. Just be prepared for what that actually means for your ears...

[hillbilly]

Sport-- you were on beat. You will learn soon how it rolls here.

[glennny]

Frankie wrote:

... glennny only eats 15/16 of every meal in an apparent homage to Steve Vai's "Little Green Men."

Oh man, that killed me! My wife didn't understand why that was so funny. You have no idea how much I love that song, well maybe you do.

[RangerDenni]

Frankie..
I very muchly do admire your work so hearing nice things said about what I am doing is certainly a day-maker, to say the least

[blue]

I heard a bunch of you say you wanted to remix the sos tune. Here are the raw tracks, nicely lined up and ready to roll.

http://www.sonofsupercar.com/music/sono ... tracks.zip

is there a bpm or approximation other than "the meter in blue's head"?

no idea.. we never touch the stuff.

[Heine]

Are you willing to post this song without drums? Please!

How could I say no after being asked like that?
Here you go:
http://soundcloud.com/sportswriters/val ... y-no-drums

Thank you very much! For me it's perfect, now! Great work!

Sportswriters: ... There is something exceedingly familiar about the chord progression and melody, but I can't exactly place it. ...

Well, in some places I get a really nice kinda "Morning has broken" feeling.

[frankie big face]

Frankie wrote:

... glennny only eats 15/16 of every meal in an apparent homage to Steve Vai's "Little Green Men."

Oh man, that killed me! My wife didn't understand why that was so funny. You have no idea how much I love that song, well maybe you do.

There's no "Like" button here so I have to quote your whole post to say I'm glad I struck my target with that one. For a split second, I thought "maybe that's too obscure even for Glenn," but I went for it anyway!