Drunk, Drunk, Drunk, Drunk, Drunk (Five Nights in Britain)

[Bolio]

My vote goes to 'Tiny Robots' & I was about to say they could give Loyalty Day a good run for their money... until I found out it is Loyalty Day

[a bebop a rebop]

blah blah blah

Recently, I went to Italy, Florence in particular. So of course, while I was there, I had to go to a dance club.

It was great, amazing. At the beginning of the evening, there was a sort of dance competition for a while, in which a few Italian break dancers would take turns showing off, maybe even doing a few collaborative efforts here and there, while the crowd cheered them on. Fun for all.

Except that there were these three drunk American assholes who kept stumbling on to the dance floor and challenging the dancers to fights. They kept yelling at the Italians and generally acting like it was a frat party. One of them actually got out there and danced, a drunken, shambling affair.

I couldn't help but cringe at the realization that the 200 Italians in that dance club were having their stereotype of the American asshole reinforced.

In case this parable wasn't clear enough, I'll distill it for the Elk Grove boys: don't be asses. Seriously.

-Jesus Christ

(I know, I know, it's not the mustard seed or the prodigal son. Come on, it's the best I could do on short notice.)

[LukeU]

cool

[blue]

I just want to reiterate how cool I think SOS's track is this week; being an actual band with real drums is always gonna give you an edge and you've been around ages I know but it's only in this week's song and it's Guided by Voices-gone-Slint-iness tha's made me pay attention properly and get other people to listen to this. I promise I won't mention GBV and SOS again in the same sentence but (although they're not the world's greatest band) for me they're a massive inspiration and when you chuck some dark shit in there too it only gets better. I fucking love Slint, and now instead of telling people
"shut up, sit down and listen to Spiderland AND Alien Lanes"
I can just say
"sonofsupercar - FNIB; now fuck off and get some taste"

which makes me a happy bunny

ps. thanks for everybodies comments on the kazoo; I did it for you guys

hey thanks Pedro and everyone who liked our song this week. we worked really hard on getting the sounds "just so." sadly, we were missing our bassist, so Dennis did double duty. i'm still not convinced the damn bass is in tune. i'm pretty surprised no one has called out the Radioheadishness of the tune so far.

Slint and GBV-loving internet music nerds are our exact demographic. (and strippers).

being a band with drums doesn't give you an edge, it just gives you more shit to deal with in the mix. recording and mixing live drums is the hardest thing ever.

[ruin8r]

<b>A-Log</b> -- no like vocals so much. music not very exciting
<b>Bjam</b> -- folky. could imagine enjoying hearing this in a coffee house or something
<b>Chuck Chuck Moose</b> -- jazzy. ambitious. uh
<b>Damien Verrett</b> -- video game theme song. The vocals could maybe have been mixed better.
<b>Dark Liberty</b> -- britpunk. short. Crazy instrumental stuff near the end is interesting.
<b>Fourth Doctor</b> -- techno. yawn.
<b>Hot Tub Combo</b> -- Low quality recording. Hard to say much else.
<b>The I.P.A.</b> -- Nice riff in the beginning. After that it's just sort of annoying up until the percussion thing at the end.
<b>Jesse Cooper</b> -- Reminds me of the 70s. Or something.
<b>Johnny Cashpoint</b> -- Clash? Sounds like that's what this is trying to sound like.
<b>Klownhole</b> -- I think this is one of our better efforts.
<b>MC Paul Denyer</b> -- Hmmm. A bit monotonous and the rhymes aren't very clever although they seem to be trying to be.
<b>Melvin</b> -- As usual, the performance and recording are great. Tune's not really sticking in my head though. Reminds me of something alterna-pop-rock.
<b>Motor Monkeys</b> -- Rock. Vocals are competent. Yawn.
<b>Mr. Man and Dr. Funk</b> -- Reminds me of Death Cab For Cutie. I like the guitar.
<b>sonofsupercar</b> -- Waiting for something to happen. It happened. Waiting for something more to happen. Same thing happened again. The in between stuff does have a nice feel to it. Guitar is happening.
<b>State Shirt</b> -- Majestic intro. The majesty sounds like other majesty I have heard. Yawn. Interlude. More majesty.
<b>Steve Gamble</b> -- I thought it was supposed to be "nights". Funny sounding though. Or rather it sounds like it should be funny. Bluesy guitar solo good. Needs to be funnier.
<b>Those Meddling Kids</b> -- Is that a kazoo? This is OK in a derivative of whiny British bands kind of way. I like the high-energy bits.
<b>Tiny Robots</b> -- Sounds nice and all. Similar to some other nice song that I can't figure out.
<b>Tommy sheets</b> -- Yawn.
<b>Veuve Clique</b> -- Ouch. Too much treble. Can't really listen to this comfortably. Funny stuff, especially the breakdown. I would like this a lot more if the first 2/3 didn't hurt my ears so much.

[LukeU]

Harsh, Gargle.

[rone rivendale]

After doing tiny little reviews for the songs I liked earlier in the thread, I listened to the songs many many times over and I decided on Tiny Robots. It's a catchy little song and I think of the averageness that was the two songs for last week that yours was the best one. And I look forward to many more songs in the future, female voices are a welcome change when 98% of the entries seem to be male.

[LukeU]

I think Tiny Robots should win this fight. It'll be awesome if they do!

[Southwest_Statistic]

Melvin, your song is amazing. I've played it more then anything else today. I wish the chorus was done again at the very end of the song. With the "Oooh's in it to change it up. I love the way the bass delays for the 2nd 3rd and 4th chords in the chorus. Awesome.

[furrypedro]

female voices are a welcome change when 98% of the entries seem to be male.

I wish I could do something to tip that balance a little, but there's a problem....

[melvin]

Melvin, your song is amazing.

Thanks! You know, I think you're right about adding a super-chorus at the end. You've inspired me to do some editing/re-recording... stay tuned...

[Meatwad]

Only have time to do notables. Sorry:

Melvin - you always do quality work. I don't always like the style of the song, but I always appreciate that it's well done and seems earnest. Excellent production too. Good job.

State Shirt - I like the murkiness of the production. It's got a wall of noise quality about it that appeals to me. Also, it's reminiscent of Radiohead's The Bends. At places at least. And that is never a bad thing. Could use a big loud noise of some kind to break the song out of it's plod. Or else it could use more of a build-up approach.

Tiny Robots - this is nice. Nothing really stands out as exceptional or offensive. Well done and simple.

Klownhole - people always complain that the vocals are buried in the mix. So we made sure they were audible this time. However, that does not guarantee they will be intelligible. It's all about the feel, not the words. Words are for cowards. Face noises. Rest assured, the song is about 5 Nights in Britain.

Mr. Man and Dr. Funk - the song is very generic. But you get honorable mention for the production. I hate you for being able to make it sound this good. You guys are dicks. Jerks.

Dark Liberty - Any songfight entry that isn't heartfelt emo folksy pop will get extra points from me. Having said that, this is just ok.

Sonofsupercar - this is pretty great. Except for parts of it. There are parts which seem like you are trying to sound tortured, but they just come off as awkward. Oh wait, you are doing some kind of rap/Lou Reed breakdown. I don't like that. Man, this is really close to being good. It's got some great progressions and riffs. And some of the textures and buildup are excellent. There you go, that's the way to end a song. Good job.

[Damien Verrett (Jonas)]

blah blah blah

Recently, I went to Italy, Florence in particular. So of course, while I was there, I had to go to a dance club.

It was great, amazing. At the beginning of the evening, there was a sort of dance competition for a while, in which a few Italian break dancers would take turns showing off, maybe even doing a few collaborative efforts here and there, while the crowd cheered them on. Fun for all.

Except that there were these three drunk American assholes who kept stumbling on to the dance floor and challenging the dancers to fights. They kept yelling at the Italians and generally acting like it was a frat party. One of them actually got out there and danced, a drunken, shambling affair.

I couldn't help but cringe at the realization that the 200 Italians in that dance club were having their stereotype of the American asshole reinforced.

In case this parable wasn't clear enough, I'll distill it for the Elk Grove boys: don't be asses. Seriously.

-Jesus Christ

(I know, I know, it's not the mustard seed or the prodigal son. Come on, it's the best I could do on short notice.)

I sure hope no one thinks I'm an ass.

I mean come on... I have like 6 posts.

[LukeU]

Wow, it took a long time for you to say that, espessially considering you don't know "the elk grove boys" in any way.

[blue]

There are parts which seem like you are trying to sound tortured, but they just come off as awkward.

we're just trying to rock out, man.

[Meatwad]

There are parts which seem like you are trying to sound tortured, but they just come off as awkward.

we're just trying to rock out, man.

No question about that. I'm not saying who I voted for, but this one captured my interest more than the others.

[blue]

Anthony: the click track is the best part. please carefully reconsider whether or not your music belongs on the internet.

Bjamzle: the chorus guitar changes are very odd and lead to a weird vocal melody. the whole song feels like you're never sure what's gonna happen next. was this an AAD song?

Chuckchuck: I wrote this off as lite jazz the first time I listened to it, but it has some moments. Is your vocal flat through the entire song? The delivery is vaguely ben folds-ish, but there's nothing to grab ahold of. The mushy vocals don't help at all with the stilted delivery in the verses. The lack of balance in the mix is disturbing too, especially in headphones. There's a lot of potential here, almost all of it unrealized. Figure out where you're going with the song and play to your strong points.

Jonas Murdock and his Casio: Coulda used a bunch more vocal takes until it was really nailed, or at least convincing. If you're recording on a computer mic, back away from it a bit. Reviewing this gave me a headache.

Dark Lib: Yeah that is one loud-ass bass drum. Why is your guitar tone buried in shit? No one needs chorus on distorted guitar, ever. If this were well-mixed, it'd at least be funny. Great energy and bridge bit.. keep it up. Lots of potential.

4th Dr: Very well done techno crap. I like all of the parts, and the flow and changes are well done. The vocals could be a little less.. I dunno. Strident, maybe. Overprocessed.. Either they're bitcrushed or something in your chain is distorting. They just sound a hair too aurally excited for the song. I really like the awful synth solo. I would have changed the chorus line to "WHAT DO YOU EXPECT, FROM THE OPPOSITE SEX?!" and then I'd have had a million-dollar dance hit to sell. Anyways, B+ internet techno is goddamn rare around here, nice job.

HOT TUB COMMIES: This was good for about ninety seconds. Turn your gain and compression down. USE YOUR POWERS FOR LISTENABLE EVIL, LUKE.

The IPA: Shins lite! Arrangement and partswise, this is one of the best songs to hit songfight in years. That guitar sounds sooo good, but the mix.. the mix.. it makes me sad. Either you're recording at a low bitrate or your mp3 bitrate isn't high enough to handle the accordian, because it is warbling badly. The drums are inaudible, and that guitar.. it disappeareded. So sad. Looking forward to more songs from you guys for sure. Next time try using 128ABR for your encoding. Or give me your song to mix.

Jesse Cooper: Classic songfight entry. Same basic chorus idea as chuxchux. Preeeeetty boring. Nothing wrong with stuff like this, but it doesn't compete in even a moderately decent fight. Bring some hooks or some.. multitracking.. at least. Something.

J$: Nice warm recording this week. No complaints on this one.

KLONZHIZZLE: I miss the bum porn. All this scientific, sterile rock you guys have been doing lately is really ruining your reputation. What's up with the lyrics, man? Political diatribes, from KH? Never thought I'd hear it. Tell Ralph to tune that fucking snare drum.

MC PAUL "I WRITE SONGS ABOUT KILLING SONGFIGHTER'S GIRLFRIENDS" DENYER: You do rap better than Pigpen. This is scarily almost good.

Melvin: Come on dude, you can obviously produce good-sounding music, emo is dead as shit, it's time to move on, get out of the genre trap, and write you some songs that aren't fifty billion signifiers of every bad emo band ever strung in a row.

MM: I go back and forth on liking this song. It has great energy, but the bluesy guitar kinda ruins it for me. Call it genre bias.

MMAN+DFUNK: whichever fifteen year old wrote your lyrics ruined this song for everyone.

Stateshirt: PODS RUIN EVERYTHING. See, if you were using manly man gear, you wouldn't have that brown sheen from crappy A/D conversion all over your song. Missing the hookie goodness and backwards dog samples of your best tunes, but a good song nonetheless.

Steven A Gamble, ESQ: See my review for Jesse Cooper. This kinda thing just doesn't cut it in any good songfight. This isn't the sidewalk in front of the Salvation Army. Put some ass into it.

TMK: Your usual above-average drum programming this week, for sure. I like how the mix goes from empty in the first bit to full in the second.. good change there. The rambly lyrics lose my interest pretty quickly, tho, and it still feels like you're stringing parts together more than looking for a song. Or maybe my attention span isn't up to the challenge. Also, try a song where you really, really mean the lyrics. You've got that breathy half-ass disease. Give us something more. But yeah, kazoo.

Tiny Robots: GIANT ROBOTS. Hey so listen to those J Cash American recordings for my favorite ever acoustic guitar mixes. They put the main (clicky) bit in the middle, and then it sounds like 2 or 3 other mics mixed at various places right or left. This mix still fatigues me quickly because of the acoustic picky picky.

Tommy Sheets: Well your song has parts, but they're all parts from a 1983 AOR song. Google you up some free mastering software.

Veuve: Classic example of awful internet techno + guitar. Be more like the 4th Dr.

[LukeU]

Blue-MMAN+DFUNK: whichever fifteen year old wrote your lyrics ruined this song for everyone.

Man, I'm just getting pummelled by jerks on these forums. This one guy, talking about his trip to France, and somehow tying in how he doesn't like me; jb, threatening to ban me for saying something about a taco; Bjam, saying Jordan and I act too silly to make good songs, (??) and this guy, who gave us a bad review or something or another...And he said something about Melvin making emo songs. Melvin can make better songs than you anytime, blue. He's one of the best on songfight.

Goodbye, songfight.

How does everyone know I'm 15? Creepy... haha

[blue]

if only you asstassticical noobs would live up to your promises of leaving, the whole internet would be nicer.

so you find "and i'm the only one here with straight teeth" to be a defensible lyric? you don't understand why that might make people reach straight for the skip button?

[melvin]

so you find "and i'm the only one here with straight teeth" to be a defensible lyric?

Actually, that line made me enjoy the song more.

Where is Elk Grove? Do they like emo there?

[Damien Verrett (Jonas)]

It's like 20 minutes from sacramento.

I don't think we like emo...

[stueym]

some emo bullshit and empty threats

Well Google and a quick scout around public domain myspace accounts kinda tells most folks everything they need to know. Soliciting friends to vote for you to win (Is Songfight really about the winning?) and making sarcastic remarks about other songfighters behind their backs isnt really going to endear you to folks around here never mind the nonsense you spout on the forums.

If your minds and hearts are trully open.....

1. Grow up (in attitude not years)

2. Leave the pitiful highschool cafeteria insider jokes, snickering and finger pointing at others out of your repetoire

3. Understand that in any community in which you'd like to be respected you earn that through your actions and behaviour whether its Songfight or elsewhere. Teenage rebellion is all just fine, just expect to get smacked for being too cocky if you try to abuse it in a well established community.

4. concentrate on developing your undeniable musical talent which is what you should have been getting attention for.

With that good luck, good night and....Sayonara??!!

Reviews to follow shortly