My Darling Reviews

Discuss upcoming, current, and previous song fights.
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roymond
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Post by roymond »

Jefff wrote:
roymond wrote: <b>Add</b>: I love how this simple song sounds far more complicated than it is. Very Talking Heads 77 in it's directness. The mix suffers a bit here and there,
Glad you like the song, Roy. It'd be useful to get some specifics on where you think the mix has problems. Thanks.
Yeah i figured i should be a little more specific.

Entrance of synths at 2:05 is high, but perhaps simply longer, sloped attacks would do it, it's too sudden an entrance for me.

Solo voice at 3:05 could be softer and more intimate. Sometimes i like leaning in to listen. But then grow to the full sound by 4:41. How does that go for public speakers? "If you want people to hear what you're saying, speak softer". Un-intuitive but very effective at times. This is not a mix problem, just a personal choice.

Entrance of bass at 3:47 seems clearly at the same level as during the full mix, but is too exposed here. It's not empethetic to what's happening around it.
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Post by roymond »

melvin wrote:Embers of Autumn: I’d also give the vocals a little more work. The trick that really helped me was to play the vocal melody on guitar and practice singing to it, so you can really attack a clear melody with confidence. Finally, I’d punch up the drums in the mix, but tone down the excessive use of fake cymbals.
Bingo. Great advice on vocals. Even record the melody on keys or guitar. And I had the same thoughts about the cymbals. They're a little over the top!
melvin wrote:Roymond feat. Anti-M: This is really cool. Great vocal combo. I’ll probably sound like a real musical simpleton saying this, but this has a sophistication to it that kind of fascinates me as a writer of, uh, relatively simple music. The way that change is executed just after 3:00 is seriously amazing. The reprise after 4:00 seems a little unnecessary, to be honest. Nonetheless, this track sounds exotic and moody in a very cool way. Nice work.
Shoot, thanks for the positive feedback folks. Still feeling quite rusty in recording mode, but it's great to get back into it. The recurring bleeps are Sputnik 1 recorded over Washington DC back in the day (I assume by the CIA or somebody), since the due date (Oct 4) was the 50th anniversary of its launch.

All the guitar, bass and male vocal parts are rough takes, doctored a little to create a passable mix for Em to sing to. But then I didn't get to redo any of them, so some more doctoring happened. Em's vocals were real cool but largely on their own since I asked her to try taking the lead. So out of indecision about what parts to use I edited them like crazy and now it feels like she's on stage with me. Sorry about all the razor blades, Em!

The change at 3:00 is...all in the mix. Em's vocals ended on the same note as the distorted guitar, so the transition sort of made itself happen. The drum loop that comes in is slower and in 4 to set it off from the rest, and Em's harmonies counter my original vocals for the full choral effect. This section is sort of an after-thought where the guy is reflecting on the fact that everything he thought had happened was in his head, either a fantasy or a nightmare. I liked the waltz for the main section and wanted to bring that back at the end. Sorry if it feels too long for that.
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Post by EmbersOfAutumn »

roymond wrote:
melvin wrote:Embers of Autumn: I’d also give the vocals a little more work. The trick that really helped me was to play the vocal melody on guitar and practice singing to it, so you can really attack a clear melody with confidence. Finally, I’d punch up the drums in the mix, but tone down the excessive use of fake cymbals.
Bingo. Great advice on vocals. Even record the melody on keys or guitar. And I had the same thoughts about the cymbals. They're a little over the top!
Yeah, this was my first attempt at using my keyboard to synthesize the drums, so I went through it knowing it was gonna be rough. I appreciate the specifics on the feedback. Also, I really appreciate the suggestion of laying down a melody track for vocals. I was actually going to do something along those lines but talked myself out of it at the last minute. I'll definiately try that on the next go around.
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The M's

Post by The Weakest Suit »

Here are 3 reviews:

MC Eric B – Eric, this song is quite a departure from your previous songs, for the most part. The prechorus part has the familiar melody of your previous songs (ashes to ashes part), but the rest of it experiments with melodies far beyond anything I’ve heard from you yet. I’m not a big fan of the sound of the double tracked vocals on the chorus, but the melody there is nice, as is the verse melody. The only other nit-pick I have with this song is that the drums sound out of time in places, but it really does not take away from my enjoyment of this song. Great job stepping outside the box.

Melvin – The “this melody is meant to hold you” line is great. Once the rest of the instrumentation kicked in, my first thought was: “this is a really nice mix”. Overall, I really like this song. The vocals/melody seem both intimate and expansive at the same time and the tone on the guitar solo adds that touch of strangeness that the song needs. Nice, short, sweet, and thanks.

MSP – This song grows in layers, which I really like. By one minute it seems most of it has kicked in. Nice build up. There is so much going on here, and I like most of it. Very professional sounding recording, and it seems that a lot of time went into the execution of this tune. Are you a band or one person playing all the parts? Either way, excellent job.
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The OR's

Post by The Weakest Suit »

Here are 3 more reviews:

Of Science and Numbers - I’m just going to come out and say that horns and ska rhythms are the two top things I hate to hear in rock songs. I’m tying hard to get past that and see that this song is very nice. It’s well recorded and performed. The lead vocals seem, I don’t know…either a little flat or too loud or something that makes them not quite mesh with the song to me. It’s not that I don’t like the song, I do like it, but it’s not really the style I prefer to listen to.

Ralph Makes Music – I like the idea of this one a lot. I don’t think this recording accurately captures your vision for this song though. The sped up parts sound a little out of control (not in the best way) and I found the double tracked vocals to be frustrating because they didn’t match up too well (even to be somewhat off for the sake of sounding indie). Overall, I like the melodies and ideas here more than the execution.

Roymond – This is a nice enough song, but the slow tempo and lack of variation lead me to question why it had to be so long. Is it two people singing, or one person and another pitch shifted track of the same person? The big changes at around 3 and 4 minutes really become more of the same after all vocals start up again. There is just not anywhere near enough going on in this song to keep me interested in this for as long as it is if I were not reviewing it. It’s pleasant, and something I would probably like more under different circumstances, but it does not stand out as a fight winner to me.
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Post by The Weakest Suit »

Last 3 songs:

Spinlock – Great soundscape build up here. I like the pull back to start the verse and the gradual build up to the chorus. The hook is in full effect here. This is one that has stuck in my head more than most of the others for this fight. The song is short and sharp and always makes me want to listen to it again.

Sven Mullet – The melody kicks you in the head from the first beat. This is some catchy shit. I like the guitar interplay during the verses. I think I like the verses better than the chorus. Either way, this song rocks and is very fun to listen to. Not much else to say. I’ll be keeping this one.

The Weakest Suit – This is my song. I had originally written a much more poppy number about a guy who’s girlfriend or daughter (lyrics were never completely set) was being ruined by her sudden love of radio rock. I attempted to record this song without a plan and it was plain that it was not going to be done right, so I abandoned it and began to work on another angle I had developed earlier in the week. I didn’t have time to record beyond what I had already written, so I just recorded one verse and one chorus. I adjusted the key from Em to Gm and couldn’t find my capo, so it was a challenge to smoothly play some of the chords here. I only had time for one vocal track and one very made up on the spot accent guitar track. Needless to say, I like the unfinished song better than this one, like last fight when I wrote a song to fit The White Hat’s unofficial challenge but recorded a different one. Oh, well. This has been quite a nice fight.
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Re: The OR's

Post by roymond »

The Weakest Suit wrote:Roymond – This is a nice enough song, but the slow tempo and lack of variation lead me to question why it had to be so long. Is it two people singing, or one person and another pitch shifted track of the same person?
Yeah, I get this a lot. I generally have little patience for 3 minute pop/rock songs, so I guess it's just like that. Thanks for the listen, though.

The other voice is anti-m's.
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Post by obscurity »

obscurity wrote:I didn't get this finished in time, but if anyone wants to hear my entry for My Darling Ruin (featuring me actually playing guitar!) you can grab it here.
Hey folks, I was really hoping to get some input on what people thought of the guitars and general arrangement of this one (I already know people won't like the vocals though :) ). Anyone care to spare a few minutes and give me some feedback?
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Post by Märk »

Sorry, dude, I was going to include your song in my reviews. And then I forgot.

Obscurity: This is perhaps the 'funnest', groovy song I've heard from you. I love the guitar line, although it kind of gets tired towards the end. I can't comment on the lyrics, because I can't understand a single word with that distortion effect... except 'This is not a relapse'. I can say the vox sound surprisingly good, I say surprisingly because I'm not a huge fan of distorted vox, but it really works for you.
Apart from that, I think the drums should be huge and kick you in the head, but they're kind of blippy and restrained. If you're planning a remix, change the patch and CRANK them. Worthy of multiple listens as is, though.
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Post by Billy's Little Trip »

obscurity wrote:
obscurity wrote:I didn't get this finished in time, but if anyone wants to hear my entry for My Darling Ruin (featuring me actually playing guitar!) you can grab it here.
Hey folks, I was really hoping to get some input on what people thought of the guitars and general arrangement of this one (I already know people won't like the vocals though :) ). Anyone care to spare a few minutes and give me some feedback?
Over all fun to listen to.
But musicians are your toughest critics, so here goes:
1. The first guitar stumbles uncomfortably on the end of the second measure.
2. A couple of the FX are way to founded by Nine Inch Nails to not notice (give it another 10 years)
3. The ending punch ins need the "clicks" cleaned up.

I don't have a problem with the vox and I like the arrangement a lot. Very dynamic, and as I said, fun to listen to.
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Post by roymond »

obscurity wrote:
obscurity wrote:I didn't get this finished in time, but if anyone wants to hear my entry for My Darling Ruin (featuring me actually playing guitar!) you can grab it here.
Hey folks, I was really hoping to get some input on what people thought of the guitars and general arrangement of this one (I already know people won't like the vocals though :) ). Anyone care to spare a few minutes and give me some feedback?
I love these guitars. That you're moving into instrumental parts makes them even better. Treatments give them life and it's almost as if Obscurity found a compatible guitarist to join the band rather than stapling some half-assed fretboard wank on. Maybe one gripe would be that there's a lot of guitar in there. So once they fade back into your arsenal of sound it won't sound like you bought a guitar and want to paste it all over the place. But it doesn't really sound like that, really. Also, I wish the vocals were clearer, still affected, but not so obscure...oh, wait...this isn't about vocals, right?

I didn't want to say anything the first time, but your request for reviews under a set of your reviews for the folks who did get it done on time might have prompted a faster response ;)
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Post by roymond »

And to round things off...

<b>Lord of Oats</b>: I like the sort of "I'm spacey but frustrated with life but not really pissed, I don't think" feeling, which makes the lyric bearable. Three chord verses like this get tired after the second round, so try to through in some surprises to break out of that death spiral. I find your voice and playing perfectly capable and your bass and kick sync but it doesn't seem like you had anything to say, and didn't really want to sound like you did anyway. I like the topographic of the solo and the phrasing. Oh, and the surprising ending...see? Shakes things up!

<b>MC Eric B</b>: I do like the tuba (synth?)! Not since Father Bingo has such been employed, me thinks. There's a certain Residents feel here (especially the chorus), but it's not twisted enough, which would have been cool. I kept thinking "my friend Rune"?
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Post by MSP »

Acid Cadillac – I liked the energy on the verses. Not too thrilled with the way the melody follows the chord changes so closely. Put the vocals back some on the mix. I liked the ending change-up.

Add – Nice tune. Really like the backing vocals, both in the parts & the sound. I’d suggest finding spots to leave out the picking guitar part that adds the color during versus & choruses. It would make it more special & perc up the listener…it’s a cool part. I would have faded out way sooner during the part where you come back in with just voice & guitar.

Down with Gender – I liked the production & the distorted vocals. There is a station in Seattle that plays this type of music every Sunday night. I liked the song!

Embers Of Autumn – This song is easy to enjoy. I would have kept the arpeggio guitar sparse like the beginning thru a lot more of the song. Once it got busy it got distracting. I think we’ve already established the cymbals were too much.

Strangers – Builds & comes back down well, got a little repetitive though.

Jobolito – Very nice sounding acoustic guitars at the start. Once the heavy part starts, you should pull the lead vocals down & throw a bit more reverb so it’s sits better.

Level Nivelo – Interesting take on the tune.

Lopez – Should have stuck with the 7/8 part…that was really cool. The rest didn’t thrill me. Props for such a good story.

Lord Of Oats – I like the idea, I think the beats for the verses & choruses could have matched up better. Maybe if you picked one or the other & just did a variation.

MC Eric – Didn’t do anything for me.

Melvin – I have to admit, the first few listens in my car I skipped pass this because it was laying there for so long, but just now I listened to all of it & found it to be a pleasant surprise. I’m hearing something breaking up in the mix but I can’t tell if it’s the guitar or a mic or something, but no worries the song still shines. That is a cool tune.

MSP – I was trying to get away from the Yacht Rock umbrella people said my last tune fell under, so I went with something a little more aggressive.

Of Science & Numbers – This was cool because I haven’t heard Ska for a while so it was refreshing. A little work on the phrasing of the lead vocals would make a good song great. The mix & the instrumentation is top notch!

RWB – Another tune where the vocal melody followed the chord changes too close.

Roymond – I love that guitar staying on the lone chord in the verses…the chorus-echo tone along with the repeating rhythm section was perfect. I’ve listened to the song a number of times & I still can’t decide if the vocals are creepy or genius…perhaps both? The heavy compression on the voices was a nice touch.

Spinlock – Even though the production elements on this tune are circa late 80’s techno, I like this song the most of the bunch. I’m a huge Utopia fan and this just gives me that comfortable feeling like putting on my favorite sweatshirt. It’s just missing the mid-rock guitar & some sweet harmonies & this would be a 10 in my book. Let me know if you ever want to co-write a tune!

Sven – I’m diggin’ this one as well. I’d suggest saving the heavily distorted guitars for the choruses & go with a medium distortion (like a Fender Twin) on the versus so that it sounds heavier when you hit the chorus. Nice bass & drums work.

Weakest Suit – Vocals could use work. The chord progression & melody are there, but not much in the way of dynamics or production.
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Post by Spud »

Hey MSP. Seattle? Let's get together for a beer. PM me.

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Post by obscurity »

Sven wrote:Obscurity: This is perhaps the 'funnest', groovy song I've heard from you. I love the guitar line, although it kind of gets tired towards the end. I can't comment on the lyrics, because I can't understand a single word with that distortion effect... except 'This is not a relapse'. I can say the vox sound surprisingly good, I say surprisingly because I'm not a huge fan of distorted vox, but it really works for you.
Apart from that, I think the drums should be huge and kick you in the head, but they're kind of blippy and restrained. If you're planning a remix, change the patch and CRANK them.
Fun? Wow, I was so not going for that! I've posted the lyrics to the lyric thread in case you're curious. I know what you mean about the drums, although I also like what I've currently got. Maybe something meatier coming slamming in halfway through would have been a good idea tho'. Food for thought, thank you.
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Post by obscurity »

Billy's Little Trip wrote:Over all fun to listen to.
But musicians are your toughest critics, so here goes:
1. The first guitar stumbles uncomfortably on the end of the second measure.
2. A couple of the FX are way to founded by Nine Inch Nails to not notice (give it another 10 years)
3. The ending punch ins need the "clicks" cleaned up.

I don't have a problem with the vox and I like the arrangement a lot. Very dynamic, and as I said, fun to listen to.
I'm used to songfight criticism (boy am I used to songfight criticism! :) ) so there's no need for the disclaimer :)

Yeah, I'm unashamedly and unrepentantly ripping off nin. I thought it'd make a nice change from ripping off the sisters :)

By 'clicks', do you mean the bit at 2:36-2:38? If so, that was deliberate (no, really, honest!). If you mean something else, can you please let me know more specifically what you meant, 'cos it wasn't deliberate and has snuck behind my back!
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Post by obscurity »

roymond wrote:I love these guitars. That you're moving into instrumental parts makes them even better. Treatments give them life and it's almost as if Obscurity found a compatible guitarist to join the band rather than stapling some half-assed fretboard wank on. Maybe one gripe would be that there's a lot of guitar in there. So once they fade back into your arsenal of sound it won't sound like you bought a guitar and want to paste it all over the place. But it doesn't really sound like that, really. Also, I wish the vocals were clearer, still affected, but not so obscure...oh, wait...this isn't about vocals, right?
I can't tell you how relieved I am that I seem to have gotten away with the guitars! I'm really pretty useless as a guitarist and these had to be melodyned to within an inch of their lives in order to get the timing right (the 'stumble' that blt referred to was a deliberate choice, honest!) and I was worried that they'd come out sounding too processed and fake.

Sorry, I wasn't trying to forestall any criticism of the vocals, well, ok, maybe I was trying to forestall the 'sing higher' chorus, but really not even that, just saying that I already know. To be honest, I also would hae preferred the vocals to be clearer, in the first verse at least. But I'd already spent 3 evenings trying to get useable takes by this point and just so completely ran out of time it wasn't even funny. You've no idea how jealous I am of folks who can nail it in one try!
roymond wrote: I didn't want to say anything the first time, but your request for reviews under a set of your reviews for the folks who did get it done on time might have prompted a faster response ;)
Good point, and I'd have done it that way round if it'd occured to me. I promise that reviews will be coming at some point over the weekend, tho'.
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Post by Billy's Little Trip »

obscurity wrote:
Billy's Little Trip wrote:Over all fun to listen to.
But musicians are your toughest critics, so here goes:
1. The first guitar stumbles uncomfortably on the end of the second measure.
2. A couple of the FX are way to founded by Nine Inch Nails to not notice (give it another 10 years)
3. The ending punch ins need the "clicks" cleaned up.

I don't have a problem with the vox and I like the arrangement a lot. Very dynamic, and as I said, fun to listen to.
I'm used to songfight criticism (boy am I used to songfight criticism! :) ) so there's no need for the disclaimer :)

Yeah, I'm unashamedly and unrepentantly ripping off nin. I thought it'd make a nice change from ripping off the sisters :)

By 'clicks', do you mean the bit at 2:36-2:38? If so, that was deliberate (no, really, honest!). If you mean something else, can you please let me know more specifically what you meant, 'cos it wasn't deliberate and has snuck behind my back!
Yes, the clicks at about 2:39 and each quick punch in there after. The click is a big pop on the meter. If that's intentional, then you should go to a pawn shop and buy a dusty old dirty 1965 Fostex mixing board and achieve that with out trying, lol.
As far as the NIN FX, who am I to judge. Bottom line, it sounds cool. :wink:
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Post by Märk »

obscurity wrote:You've no idea how jealous I am of folks who can nail it in one try!
Not bragging or anything (I mean, I hate the sound of my own voice, and consider myself to be a bad singer) but I generally do one take on vox after practicing a few times. I have the (possibly enviable, but mostly not) advantage of working in a factory, in an isolated booth, which is noisy and requires earplugs as per safety standards. I literally practice singing all day long, every day. I can hear myself clearly with the 'plugs in, and no one else can, so it works for everyone. I used to be horribly self-conscience about my vocals, to the point of not being able to do any songfights because I share a house with other people... I'm at the point now where I might be able to perform live again. I think I've actually improved over the last year or so, others may disagree :)
I guess I'm saying just sing whenever you have a chance, and you'll at least develop the confidence to not care.
I'm drunk, BTW, so this whole rambling post might be crazy and non-sensical.
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Post by roymond »

Billy's Little Trip wrote:2. A couple of the FX are way to founded by Nine Inch Nails to not notice (give it another 10 years)
Virtually every sound, chord progression and lyric has been done before. To worry about this (unless you're basically copying a song of theirs) is pretty silly. Not everyone even knows who NIN are, or has listened to them in the last 10 years, or would attribute something as a "NIN FX". If you're going to make music only on the basis of sounding completely original, you're not going to get very far. On the contrary, in order to sound original, you have to make a lot of possibly un-original music first.
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Billy's Little Trip
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Post by Billy's Little Trip »

roymond wrote:
Billy's Little Trip wrote:2. A couple of the FX are way to founded by Nine Inch Nails to not notice (give it another 10 years)
Virtually every sound, chord progression and lyric has been done before. To worry about this (unless you're basically copying a song of theirs) is pretty silly. Not everyone even knows who NIN are, or has listened to them in the last 10 years, or would attribute something as a "NIN FX". If you're going to make music only on the basis of sounding completely original, you're not going to get very far. On the contrary, in order to sound original, you have to make a lot of possibly un-original music first.
True, good point.
But a chord or chord sequence can be played a trillion different ways because of a kazillion different factors, where as a sound that is developed and marketed, such as a famous Trent Reznor sound, is in a sense, a product. Not the FX to create the sound, but the sound it self. I'm just rambling thoughts here. Not to argue, but it's making me think about this deeper. Has anyone ever patented a sound? Reverb?
Last edited by Billy's Little Trip on Sat Oct 13, 2007 11:09 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Post by erik »

roymond wrote:
Billy's Little Trip wrote:2. A couple of the FX are way to founded by Nine Inch Nails to not notice (give it another 10 years)
Virtually every sound, chord progression and lyric has been done before. To worry about this (unless you're basically copying a song of theirs) is pretty silly. Not everyone even knows who NIN are, or has listened to them in the last 10 years, or would attribute something as a "NIN FX". If you're going to make music only on the basis of sounding completely original, you're not going to get very far. On the contrary, in order to sound original, you have to make a lot of possibly un-original music first.
Sure, but just because every sound/progression/lyric has been done before doesn't mean that every time one hears a song, one thinks "Okay, that song sounds like Band X using Chord Progression Y and Lyric Z." Most of the time when I hear music, it sounds original enough that I don't have to draw direct comparisons to something that exists already. I don't think it's important to be completely original in making music, just original enough so that people don't think you're ripping someone off. I think if you don't worry about this at all, you end up with a bunch of stuff that all sounds tired because no one bothered to listen to the people who said "This sounds alot like music that we already have."
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