Age-Gaps, and Inter-Office Romance

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Post by anti-m »

Paco Del Stinko wrote:Way back in my army days, a couple of my buddies sewed Canadian flags on their (civilian) back packs so as not to be mistaken for US citizens when they went on a trip through Europe. Start up your seppo sniffer, Ray, next time you see the maple - it might be an Iowan going incognito.
When I went to Rome, I was originally planning to claim Canadian-ness. Instead, I chickened out, and instead got by by learning how to say, "I am American, but I apologize for George Bush" in Italian. People were very understanding, although, this line sometimes triggered folks to launch into political conversations that immediately surpassed my Italian conversation skills -- which were essentially limited to apologizing for the president, ordering gelato, and purchasing artichokes. (Stupid Americans)
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Post by Caravan Ray »

I should have worn a maple leaf when I went to California last year. I had at least half a dozen people accuse me of be English. English!!!! Do I look like I can't play cricket and never bathe!! (err...well I suppose I probably do, but that's beside the point...)

Perhaps Rone should sew a maple leaf to his backpack. I guess that in Kansas that would make him seem all "foreign" and "exotic". That might help him pull the chicks. Or would it just get him shot as a terrorist?
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Post by Niveous »

Canadians....Terrorists? Nyah. We don't think that. Instead we just seethe with jealousy over their health care system.
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Post by Bjam »

Caravan Ray wrote:I had at least half a dozen people accuse me of be English. English!!!! Do I look like I can't play cricket and never bathe!! (err...well I suppose I probably do, but that's beside the point...)
See, I get mistaken for being Australian more than English (all though South African is growing quite a bit). Obviously an Aussie accent is a weird English/American hybrid accent.
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Post by Reist »

Rone Rivendale wrote:I'm done.
Rone Rivendale wrote:I'm done.
Rone Rivendale wrote:I'm Done.
Rone Rivendale wrote:I'm done.
Rone Rivendale wrote:I'm done.
Rone Rivendale wrote:I'm done.
Rone Rivendale wrote:I'm done.
Rone Rivendale wrote:I'm done
Rone Rivendale wrote:I'm done.
Rone Rivendale wrote:I'm done.
Rone Rivendale wrote:I'm Done.
Rone Rivendale wrote:I'm done.
Why?
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Post by Spud »

guess he was done.
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Post by WesDavis »

Entertainingly, I'm considering dating a 34 year old. I'm 23! I met her in a bar I was playing at, and I thought she was like 25. She looked it, anyway. That tells me that she probably doesn't have kids, which is really my only concern. I ain't no daddy-type right now.

I'm not looking for advice. Just street cred.
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Post by mkilly »

WesDavis wrote:Entertainingly, I'm considering dating a 34 year old. I'm 23! I met her in a bar I was playing at, and I thought she was like 25. She looked it, anyway. That tells me that she probably doesn't have kids, which is really my only concern. I ain't no daddy-type right now.

I'm not looking for advice. Just street cred.
as chief executive director of music at a radio station I hereby give you ten creds
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Post by Billy's Little Trip »

Spud wrote:guess he was done.
This........Ladies and Gentleman, is why I love this man.
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Post by boltoph »

WesDavis wrote:I thought she was like 25. She looked it, anyway. That tells me that she probably doesn't have kids. . .
You're killing me here. Is she career-minded? Career minded executive types of significant others are the best types for us musicians to date. Or marry. That way, we can stay home and teach, or do shows and such to gain some income, but not have to worry about health insurance, etc.

I'm all for age gaps. I think they're great. Just remember if she's 35, you might consider whether or not you want to have kids. Then again, you're a good 5 years away from even considering it, perhaps.

When talking of older women dating younger men, I always think there should have been a soap opera titled "As the Biological Clock Ticks" or something. A soap opera all about older women / younger men.

Anyone ever seen Harold and Maude?
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Post by HeuristicsInc »

boltoph wrote:Career minded executive types of significant others are the best types for us musicians to date.
Don't forget scientists with PhDs! ;)
boltoph wrote: Anyone ever seen Harold and Maude?
That's an awesome film, but I haven't seen it since 1994 or so. I should watch it again...
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Post by WesDavis »

boltoph wrote:
WesDavis wrote:I thought she was like 25. She looked it, anyway. That tells me that she probably doesn't have kids. . .
I'm all for age gaps. I think they're great. Just remember if she's 35, you might consider whether or not you want to have kids. Then again, you're a good 5 years away from even considering it, perhaps.
Yeah man, totally. The kids thing is something I was thinking about. Because if she wants kids anytime soon, I'm afraid I ain't aimin' to give them to her. So I reckon that's an issue that I'd have to get out of the way pretty quickly. It's honestly kind of a go nowhere situation, because I don't think I want to get hitched anytime in the near future, either. I wanted to when I was younger, and always imagined that I would get married when I was 21 or 22, but now I"m honestly thinking that there is too much I want to do first, and I don't feel particularly prepared to deal with the chitlins, though certainly if I got a girl pregnant I would man up to it. I'm no bastard!

But yeah, the only major concern to me is that this girl might have not gotten married yet, might not have kids, and that could mean that either she's a victim of circumstance, and it just never happened, or that she doesn't want to get married or have kids, which might work out for me. If she wants to get married sometime in the next 5 years, I'm more than likely not the man to do that with, unless I just fall madly in love with her, which I suppose is possible. I'm rambling. For the record, I'm kind of creeped out by the other stuff that went on in this thread. <i>I'm</i> frightened of dating 18 year olds, and it's only a 5 year gap for me. When I'm 26, gimme a 21 year old and I'm fine! But 18 is an age of stupidity.

EDIT: Oh yeah and I don't know if she's career-minded. I know she has her college degree and is thinking of going back to school for other things, but yeah I don't know much about that part of her. We talked about her job, and I know she works for the government in some capacity, but I don't know that it's especially a fancy job. I have a friend who has gotten girlfriends that are more than willing to support while he does the music thing, but I think you have to be a studmuffin for that, and I just don't fit the bill.
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Post by anti-m »

Generally I would advise postponing talking about kids/marriage/whose turn it is to take out the trash until at LEAST the second date. :lol: <br><br>Seriously, 35 year olds chatting up youthful musicians in bars are not generally looking for a sperm bank. She's probably thinking of you more as a hot piece of musician ass. Enjoy.
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Post by boltoph »

We need to change the title of this thread to something like "Age-Gaps, and Inter-Office Romance".

Definitely don't mention the kids...and definitely consider yourself a hot piece of ass when you're up there pouring out your soul with an acoustic guitar and that soulful voice, Wes!

(I was just saying the "kids" thing, ya know, in case it got "serious" . . . biological clock . . . um yeah, I know, off the mark and out of taste. There's always adoption . . .)
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Post by GlennCase »

boltoph wrote:We need to change the title of this thread to something like "Age-Gaps, and Inter-Office Romance".
Good point. Rone is no longer asking for opinions, so the thread's title was no longer accurate. So... why not?

Fixed.

Futhermore, the beginning of this thread cracks me up now.
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Post by Leaf »

I remember when I was 19, in Australia, and I got to tag a 35 year old woman.

I remember thinking how awesome it was to be taggin such a hot (and lucky me, she WAS hot) , older woman... the years of experience, the way I perceived age at this time...

I remember thinking that she was WAY older than me...

Man, that was an awesome ten minutes.


I had this youthful arrogance, and I made some retarded comment about how it must have been nice to have a younger guy...to which she shot me down with a "actually, I like the older guys better, they're not so exuberant...or quick".


HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Now, it's even funnier to me cause I'm 35.


If you view someone as too old or too young, THEY ARE. that being said, how about this little sexist inconsistency:

If you're a guy and the woman is older (like 19 to 35) , apparently this is a cool notch on the bedpost.

If you're a woman who is 19 and the guy is 35, it's creepy and bad.

There's definitely something wrong with this... I'm just not sure what it is.
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Post by anti-m »

Leaf wrote:
If you're a woman who is 19 and the guy is 35, it's creepy and bad.

There's definitely something wrong with this... I'm just not sure what it is.
Nah, I don't think it's necessarily creepy. It depends on the people.
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Post by Billy's Little Trip »

GlennCase wrote: Futhermore, the beginning of this thread cracks me up now.
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Post by boltoph »

Nice on the title change, GC!

You're a catalyst, Rone, and an estimated prophet.

So I heard there's a new reality show called "Cougar" or something. It's about older, single women. I don't watch much TV, but was flipping through channels and saw this. It really cracked me up.

In addition, I want to hear what kind of follow-through happened in your situation, Wes. I don't watch "Cougar", it would be great to hear about the real-life on-goings with said songfighters. Inquiring minds want to know . . . I mean, not the dirty details and such, but just the rated pg version, perhaps.

My girlfriend is about one year older than me, and we've been together about a year and a half. We've recently come across a problem: she doesn't want any kids . . . she wants dogs. I'm not much of a dog lover. Eff. I just can't live like this anymore, but you know what happens, you become so attached and dependent on a person, it doesn't matter what the age differences and life goals are, it's just so hard to make the right move. Maybe this is why I like reading about these situations and living vicariously through guys like Wes.

As far as the "Inter-Office" goes, well, I work with 90% women. Half of them are just out of college. We have a company outing coming up down at Rocky Neck state park in CT. It just might be interesting.

I think for me, a younger woman, office-relationship, is a good bet. Not 10 years, mind you, but more like 5 years.

My grandfather and grandmother were ten years apart.
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Post by Smalltown Mike »

WesDavis wrote: Because if she wants kids anytime soon, I'm afraid I ain't aimin' to give them to her.
It's been a looooooong time since I dated (celebrating my 10th wedding anniversary this summer) but I seem to remember that most women liked it when I said on the first date:

"I ain't gonna knock you up, so if that's what you want you better bugger off."

I'm paraphrasing slightly.
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Post by WesDavis »

Heh, well a few things!

The woman showed up at my show last night, and I had my first case(amazing, since I'm 23) of you looked better at the bar. I walked in and she was there, and I was like, "Oh dang," but I try to quell my tendency to look only at the physical side of things sometimes. Trouble is, there was absolutely no attraction there. Usually, all it takes is just a bit of attraction and a good personality, and I'm there. In this case, this girl had neither. So, that was a shame, but what can you do? She was very nice, and I ain't saying she was hideous, just very much not my type. I think that she caught on to the fact that there was absolutely no chemistry between us at this point, though, because she left rather quickly at the end of the show, in spite of my offering free CDs to anyone that wanted any.

There were others that took me up on said offer, however. A girl from work showed up that I have considered dating, but yeah, the whole inter-office romance thing keeps me at bay. She seemed to really enjoy the show, however, and I'm pretty damn sure the girl likes me. And you know, it's kind of amazing how much getting a girl out of the hideous work vest and into normal clothes can boost the attractiveness. I shouldn't talk about this here, because I promote the hell out of all of my shows, and I sure don't want to look like the jackass that has to talk to his internet friends before he will ask a girl on a date. Of course, once again, I'm NOT asking for advice, here. Just telling a story.

I do need to ask someone on a date, sometime, though. My last date was a few weeks ago and man was it ever with a girl that I ended up truly disliking. She was cool until she turned out to be the most easily offended person in the entire world.
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Post by WesDavis »

boltoph wrote: My girlfriend is about one year older than me, and we've been together about a year and a half. We've recently come across a problem: she doesn't want any kids . . . she wants dogs. I'm not much of a dog lover. Eff. I just can't live like this anymore, but you know what happens, you become so attached and dependent on a person, it doesn't matter what the age differences and life goals are, it's just so hard to make the right move. Maybe this is why I like reading about these situations and living vicariously through guys like Wes.
Oh man you can't be a dog lover when you have all that musical equipment around. Not unless it's an outside dog that will never, ever come inside. Are you wanting kids, someday? Myself, I think I'd like to eventually have some kids, but man I'm gonna have to make sure I have the right woman, because I ain't doing child support and joint custody. That's for the birds!
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