2020-07-07

[Lunkhead]

Have you ever had one of those mornings? You're trying to eat your breakfast but your cat is freaking out, so every 15 seconds you have to get up and shoo him away from something he's licking or chewing that he shouldn't be licking or chewing. Then the dozenth time you do that and go back to your breakfast, a big spider drops down from the ceiling right in front of your face and scares the heck out of you. So you get a glass and a postcard and you catch the spider and put it outside. Then you finish your breakfast, with another half dozen or so cat freakout interruptions. By then you're running late for work so you rush to get into the shower. You remember to check the tub for spiders on account of how lately every fourth time you get in the shower there's a gnarly spider in there. You don't see any spiders so you get in and turn on the water but then sure enough there IS a spider in the tub after all, and it's now trying to crawl away up the wall out of the spray of water. So you hop out of the shower wet and throw on a towel and get the glass and postcard and catch that spider too. But since you had started taking a shower your hand is a little wet so when you try to shake the spider out of the glass, the glass slips out of your hand and goes flying out the second story window and bounces off your downstairs neighbor's deck onto the ground between your house and the house next door. Yeah, me neither.

[Paco Del Stinko]

Just make sure to address all spiders as Boris.

[ken]

Did you ever get the glass back?

[Lunkhead]

I did! And it didn't even have a scratch on it. I guess it must have landed in dirt rather than on anything hard. I went to get it and couldn't find it at first but then I noticed it was set on my neighbor's deck railing. She must have found it and picked it up. Apparently it's from some Turkish company Pasabahce.