I'm huge, evil howl cow. Yum! (How Much Will You Give Me?)

Discuss upcoming, current, and previous song fights.
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Albatross
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I'm huge, evil howl cow. Yum! (How Much Will You Give Me?)

Post by Albatross »

When in doubt, you can't go wrong with an anagram.
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Rabid Garfunkel
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Post by Rabid Garfunkel »

The art wasn't that bad, was it? :shock:
"Urban cartoon music." -- Paco Del Stinko
Be my friend? --- Song of the Day
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Post by Meatwad »

Rabid Garfunkel wrote:The art wasn't that bad, was it? :shock:
I think the deal is that the Fightmaster is afraid to post the fight. Because our entry was so awesome that it had to win. Seriously, it really rocks. Hard. And there is a well documented conspiracy to keep Klownhole from winning. The Man is afraid of what we have to say.
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Rone Rivendale
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Post by Rone Rivendale »

Sad thing is, I think Meatwad believes what he's saying. :D
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Post by jackfrost »

how long is the voting period for this one? does it end thursday when the next song is due, or is it going to be longer than 2 days? it would be helpful to know when the "polls" close, because i don't usually review on my first listen.
thanks.
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Post by The White Hat »

Billy's Little Trip - This rocks. That said, the guitar tone sounds a little hollow and I can't hear the lyrics. Best rock lyrics ever: "Should have listened to your mother."

Dublin Duck Dispensary - Can't hear the lyrics. More treble please. Good concept, but the guitar seems to lose time against the vocals at times. Tap that foot a bit and you're set.

Flvxxvm Florvm - Good use of 12-string lead. Affected southern accent doesn't quite do it for me, neither do drum machines. Interesting addition of electric guitar. I'm not sure how well it fits in, but it serves for good contrast. Ok, I'm pretty much done with this at 3:00.

Four Zombies and an (Ass)Clown - Lame.

Hello Blue Monday - Vonnegut's up in heaven now. Really digging the lo-fi recording, especially with the keyboard lead. Not the biggest fan of the vocals, but the hiss pop of the recording takes me back to the days of the four-track 1/8" cassette tascam (in a good way).

Jeff Travis Henderson - Raise that guitar a little in the mix. I like. Not a big fan of the doubled vocals. I'm feeling maybe a little more joy division kind of stuff- use that baritone to your advantage and throw a little reverb on rather than phasing. Cool backup vox. Oooooh, tempo change at 2:04! I like. Maybe if you faded out on that badabada section at the end rather than just ending. Total possible vote.

Klownhole - I'm liking this. Spookcore. Vox clear. Guitar tone a little muddy and the drums don't sound blended enough into the rest of the music. Like, your bassist and guitarist and vocalist are all rocking out and then the drummer is right up front here looking at me funny.

Lord of Oats - Must resist tapping toes and bobbing head. Lead synth sounds flat to me by a couple cents. You're lucky that those songfight titles tell you to get up off your ass and record. To me, they say things like "you've got too much work to do this week, don't do it," "you can wait 'till (day fight is due) to record it," and "go study for your GREs. now." I guess that's what separates the wheat from the chaff. Titles call to the wheat. To the chaff, titles are the voice of responsibility.

MC Eric B - Cool beat. Walking into the dance club over the weekend, I told my date "this is where people go when they run out of things to say." Chorus a bit cliche.

Melvin - I like the feeling of this. Great harmonies on the chorus. Good guitar tone. Warm yet crunchy. Tambourine is a bit off, but OH YEAH ORGAN TIME YEAHHHHH!.

The Rappers - In answer to your questions: You won't rock me much at all. I won't give you much either. This reminds me of Nice Pete's band, Mister Band: http://www.achewood.com/index.php?date=12262006 Except your stuff comes from the bible, which, while a superior book, makes for lousy spook stories. I mean, they pretty much gave away the ending for us in the last chapter.

Of Science and Numbers - Solid. Tight backup vox. Good chorus, though the lyrics are on the meh side.

Paco del Stinko - Good tone awards to the whole band. Tight and solid. I'm not going to write much here, because I have no criticism. I'm just going to spend the next 1:30 rocking out, if you don't mind. Love the descending bassline.

PiGPEN - Intro's a bit long. I'm not really one for repetition of lyrics that don't bear repeating.

Puadxe - There's that garage sale horn. Swamp bluesish. I like.

Ralph Makes Music - Vox are a bit wet, but I love the guitar. Reminds me of those doleful banjo ballads. A bit heavy on the Shel Silverstein, but that can be forgiven as I loved his books.

Senza Valore - Good to hear you back. Loving the loops. Vox much improved. Very loungeish, but in a good way. Lyrics are great. Conversational, uncontrived. Great song.

Steve Durand - You had me at the horn section. Lyrics don't sound up to the quality of the song, though. The melody's fine, but the meter sounds off- forced syllables on the front of lines and the like. Still, possible vote.

Suburban Bear Quadrant - Instruments sound too mid/bassy. Vox too treble-y. I don't know if the metal voice is appropriate in situations such as the settling of checks at McDonald's. Oh, this is parody. Ok.

Vegetarian Rage - So many songs this week that rock, and yours is certainly in the vanguard, if only because you open right up with the B3 in there. Solid rock. Can't ask for much more than that.

The Weakest Suit - I'm really digging this. It's saturday evening porch noodling at its best.

The White Hat - Vox down a bit. Sharpen the guitar. Resist falsetto temptation.
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Post by Ross »

Hey Mr. Hat,

My name's not on your list, but if I'm not mistaken your review of "Ralph..." sounds like it might be about my song, yeah?

Thanks.

Ross
"I don't like this song, but at least it's good." - veGetar Ianra Ge
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Post by Meatwad »

Rone Rivendale wrote:Sad thing is, I think Meatwad believes what he's saying. :D
Well, I don't believe most things I say. But I do think this entry rocks pretty hard.
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Post by jeff robertson »

The White Hat wrote: Flvxxvm Florvm - Good use of 12-string lead.
No 12-string. Overdubs.
The White Hat wrote: Affected southern accent doesn't quite do it for me
It's real.
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Post by Caravan Ray »

jeff robertson wrote:
The White Hat wrote: Affected southern accent doesn't quite do it for me
It's real.
:lol: I love it when people say my "fake British" accent sounds dumb!
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Post by Reist »

Here's reviews of people I've heard of. I always listen to them first.

Melvin - Your method of guitar-playing has improved. The drum sound still feels a bit weak ... maybe a bit overcompressed? Good use of falsetto throughout. The yells 'how much will you give me' are great too. Well-written all around ... original verse, chill chorus, and a great bridge. Really enjoyable, lighthearted song - I liked this more than a few of your recent entries. Well done.

Lord of Oats - Going with the electronica feel again? I like the way you doubled your vocals. It gives the illusion that they're more tightly recorded (just what I do). Maybe when I do that, I should layer them on top of each other like that, instead of hard panning them. Your verse is pretty killer, and has a good dance groove to it. Your method of singing is really bouncy (with the low to high jumps so often). The chorus is better the second/third times. The song feels like it might be a bit too long, but I managed to listen to the whole thing. I always enjoy your songs. Good job.

Paco Del Stinko - Nice axework. I can't really tell what your saying - but that's okay since your guitar is so good. Vocals get much better by the second third of the song. I like your voice in a higher range. You should sing more in the higher range - it gives your voice more appeal. Not bad, but I don't find this one too memorable ... except for maybe that bassline in the bridge - that was sweet.

Billy's Little Trip - That riff is reminiscent of the PDS tune I just listened to. Vocals like this really have nothing memorable ... the guitars and drums really drive the song, but I feel unfulfilled ... I'm all about singing ... less talk/yell vocals. I can see someone who likes that style of singing really enjoying this song. Sorry.

Klownhole - I hope this rocks as much as you say it does. No. It sounds just like every Klownhole song I've heard. Sorry. The vocals seem well ... Klownhole-ish. You know what I mean. Overdone joke metal vocals which only select people will understand or enjoy. Not a favorite.

MC Eric B - Haven't listened to any of your for a while. Here we go. Ohboythatishilarious. Maybe two years ago I would have found this song funny ... sorry. You're definitely getting better at rapping and mixing though - I'll give you that. Thank God it's short.

Jeff Travis Henderson - Hey pal - haven't seen you round here for a while. You didn't - YOU PLAYED A RIFF!!! Nice. Weird vocal delivery - you're getting a lot more diverse. I really like the writing here. Are you faking a British accent? Weird, but it works. Vocals are using a pitch-correct program, right? Your range is improving too. I like the far-panned lalas ... this song is a lot more obscure than your regular stuff, and I like it. Good job.

Flvxxvm Florvm - You got rid of that atrocious vocal effect. Great choice. I can hear the click track though. I'm kind of tired of the song early on too ... I can tell it gets a bit better, but I'm getting tired of reviewing, and it's just not engaging enough. Sorry.

The White Hat - It was a good day when you came back to SongFight. Your abilities on the guitar are many. I someday hope to be able to play like that. The song is really enjoyable - you write some nice laidback songs. Wow ... you went absurdly high with that falsetto at the end. Cool, but maybe a bit over the top. Your voice definitely has gotten better since the last few songs of yours I checked out. Cool song.

Ross Durand - More good guitar-work. Nice folk song ... I'm not really blown away by anything at this point, except for the mood that you generate with the storytelling quality of your voice. That is probably the main redeeming quality for this song. Not bad.

Steve Durand - Sweet horns again ... sounds like a song that would have been included in Monsters Inc. Your voice is getting tighter, but I'm still not sure of the tone. Good luck in that endeavor. The main horn line in this song is great. Good sax solo. This sounds a lot like the W's. Quite enjoyable.

The Weakest Suit - Really lo-fi sound ... I hope you hit me with some well mixed/panned stuff soon. I'm bored ... so I skipped through and found nothing I really enjoyed. Spend more time on your recording to get some drums/bass/not one-take vocals in there.

PiGPEN - I have heard of you but never listened ... as far as I can remember. I don't think I was missing much. This is messed up, man.

Now for some people I've never heard of. I'm bracing myself for some bad rap ...

Of Science and Numbers - Better than I was expecting from the name ... vocals need more passion, but don't get out of hand with that part ... a lot of people do, and it kills a lot of initial appeal that they would have otherwise. You guys should up the key of this song ... Your voice sounds better in a high range. Competent guitar/drum performance. Not too noticeable ... mostly turned off by vocals. As I said, just up the passion and the song's key a bit, and I think your voice will sound far better.

Suburban Bear Quartet - That guitar tone is atrocious. Try experimenting with micing in order to get a better tone. Up the treble in your drum mix ... I can't tell what's going on with it. Vocals are over-the top and painful to listen to. Sorry, I can't handle any more of this.

Senza Valore - Nice strings ... this intro is like something I'd hear in the background when I'm walking around Disneyland. Vocals are a bit weak. I've already lost interest ... I'll give you a piece of advice I was given once. If you don't get into your song, how can you expect me to? That tidbit has helped me a lot through the past year. Good luck in future song-making.

Ralph Makes Music - I wasn't expecting much from this, mostly because of the name ... and my expectations were fulfilled. Plan out your melody before recording it. A made-up on the spot melody often has a lot of soul, but usually it sucks. It's cool how you experimented with using more than just the guitar (whistling, using a shaker and harmonica), but to be honest, I did not enjoy this.

Dublin Duck Dispensary - Those vocals are really high for the mix ... I can barely hear the drums. Did you rush while mixing this? Not too enjoyable ... work on that guitar tone. As I said to someone above, experiment with mic placement ... that grinding sound is not bad on top of a good beefy tone, but by itself, it sounds atrocious, and I can't really tell what you're playing. I'd like to hear this mixed well. Good ending, if a bit messy.

veGetar Ianra Ge - I just figured out what your name means - Vegetarian Rage! Hey - up until now I thought it was one of those things I'd read in those annoying Viagra spams that I get all the time. Finally some good production. Weak vocals though - vocals are muddy during the verses - up the treble a bit for the vocal track. Don't do that wavery thing so much ... when you hit the chorus, I like the tone of your voice again. Not a fan of the falsetto ... practice that lots ... it's really hard to get a good falsetto tone. Nice immature vocals ... I don't appreciate those, but I'm sure some 14-year old who just found out what swear words are would. Not bad ... guitar sounds good.

Four Zombies and a Clown - Once again, not expecting anything because of your band name. And I got nothing. This is atrocious. I have not heard anything worse since I've been here. I would be pleased if you put a song in next time.

Hello Blue Monday - I can't hear the vocals, and the rest of the song is pretty boring, so I don't really know what I can say. The progression isn't too bad. Try upping the tempo a bit ... then it might hold my attention for longer. Up those vocals in the mix too. How can I be interested if I can't tell what you're saying?

The None Rappers feat. Busted Libido - That name's pretty offensive. This is going to suck ... I can feel it ... it does. How do I turn this off? The little x in the top corner? I feel dirty just having clicked on this. I'm not clicking on this name in any other fights ... sorry.

puadxe - I'm already skipping through ... is that really the best vocal tone you've got? What do you use for recording/mixing?


Okay ... Overall, there was a lot of good guitarwork in this fight. A lot of decent vocalists, but a lot of unpracticed ones as well. There was also an excess of songs I would never click on again. I give this fight a 2/5
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Review

Post by milothefultz »

Billy's Little Trip - Awesome. Really digging the retroness of it. It's like Sabbath a little, and then it just turns totally awesome. The vocals are a bit hard to understand, but it's still a really well done mix. The lyrics I heard are also very good.

Dublin Duck Dispensary - I like the bell kit a lot. A great song, but it seems like the rhythm section is gone. Drums and bass have disappeared. It's hard to grasp a tempo in this song, but I kind of like it like that. The lyrics are a tad unclear, as well.

Flvxxvm Florvm - It doesn't seem like this song really goes anywhere during the first half or so, but then the second half kicks in, and it really starts to drive. You can really tap your foot to it, also, and that is something I noticed that about A Friendly Reminder from you, as well. I liked the metronome in the song, too. It makes it sound cowboy-esque. The lyrics make you want to listen as well. *ahem*

Four Zombies And A Clown
- What?

Hello Blue Monday - Neat intro. Good synth work. I like the lo-fi sound if only the vocals were a bit louder/more enunciated. Wow, I really like this song. It's getting stuck in my head. It sounds like The Residents, and that is a compliment. A rather good one, in fact.

Jeff Travis Henderson - The vocals sound a little bit frantic during the chorus, but other than that, really really great! The bridge is also extremely good. It really draws you in very well. Nothing really bad I can say about this song.

Klownhole - Heavy heavy heavy. Vocals are impossible to hear. The music is awesome though. It's got my head rockin' and I didn't even realize it until now. "Sunk..."

Lord Of Oats - The doubled vocals are a tiny bit much in certain parts of the song, but in certain spots, it makes it shine. However, I really want to get up and dance to this. This is definitely going on my MP3 player. Guitar at the end was a good add as well. Really fueled the ending of the song.

MC Eric B - Lol, you totally remind me of a friend of mine. This is just like if he were to rap, and this song's bizarre off-the-wall lyrics are so weird, it just makes me want to keep listening to it until the end. Wait, it's over?

Melvin - This song already sounds like it's a classic. Geez, you've gotten really good at this. I am thoroughly impressed. The song sounds full yet void at the same time. Totally sweet. Those "Gimme Some"'s at the end sounded just a tiny bit loud to me.

Nunraper + Rusted Dildo - A rather boring listen, no offense, and the drums are too loud. I can't tell what is going on at all. *shakes head*

Of Science And Numbers - The sound of this song is very comforting. Just put a little bit more power behind your words and it would totally explode during the chorus. The bridge is almost exactly what I was thinking about in the last sentence. Really really really really good!

Paco Del Stinko - Needs lead harmonica instead of lead guitar. Really interesting though. It's got a really original blues/classic rock sound and it's really captivating. Trippy slide guitar, too. I was hoping for another run through the chorus at the end, though. Darn.

PiGPEN - Weird. Really really weird. It reminds me of old DOS FPS games like Doom. This song does make me smile a lot though. Dark and creepy and weird. The chorus makes me laugh. A lot.

Puadxe - This music really paints an image in my head of what's going on. The feel of the song is nice, too. And the trumpet. I don't hear much of that in music anymore.

Ralph Makes Music - I got a dead link. Sorry.

Ross Durand - Neil Diamond. Neil Diamond. Neil Diamond. A tiny bit too much reverb. Just a hair. The lyrics make me think.

Senza Valore - Super cool sound. Lounge singer meets electronic mash-up. Awesome. There isn't much to add to this song really except a louder bassline. That's only because I play bass.

Steve Durand - JAZZ. Did you write the horn line? This song is really really catchy! The instruments are miked exceptionally well, and I applaud you for that. The vocals sounded very unrehearsed and a bit frantic.

Suburban Bear Quadrant - This song is awesome except for the sound of the drums. They're really soft and sound like cardboard. Just a better mic job would do the trick. I hear Steven Tyler when it says "How Much Will You Give Me?". BREAKDOWN! The panning on the guitar solo near the end was a little strange at the beginning, but then made sense at the end. Really weird ending. I'm not sure if I like it. The only real big deal about this song was the drums.

Vegetarian Rage - Tiny bit too much vocal reverb. Is that organ from a Casio? I honestly thought it was real until the solo! I hear a Spinal Tap single. Totally awesome guitar work! Hair metal is awesome.

Weakest Suit - Coffee shop blues. There is nothing to be criticized on this song. This is so well crafted, I am pretty jealous. Bravo!

White Hat - Crazy guitar! SaWEET! I hear a jazz guitarist...? Impressive to say the least. That ending is kickass! It gave me shivers.
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Post by The White Hat »

Hey Mr. Hat,
My name's not on your list, but if I'm not mistaken your review of "Ralph..." sounds like it might be about my song, yeah?
Thanks.
Ross
Ross, you are correct, looks like the ralph link got borked somehow and you were next on the list.
No 12-string. Overdubs.
It's real.
Well, don't I just look like an ass.
White Hat - Crazy guitar! SaWEET! I hear a jazz guitarist...? Impressive to say the least. That ending is kickass! It gave me shivers.
Jazz guitarist? You flatter me. Growing up outside the traditional "band" framework, I never got the theory instruction necessary for to become a jazz guitarist in the strictest sense. All them 7th and demolished chords you heard were just left hand luck.
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Re: Review

Post by Steve Durand »

milothefultz wrote: Steve Durand - JAZZ. Did you write the horn line? This song is really really catchy! The instruments are miked exceptionally well, and I applaud you for that. The vocals sounded very unrehearsed and a bit frantic.
Yep. Wrote 'em and played 'em.

Maybe not unrehearsed but certainly the whole thing is underrehearsed. That's what happens when you only have a few hours to put the whole thing together.

Steve
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Post by milothefultz »

The White Hat wrote:
White Hat - Crazy guitar! SaWEET! I hear a jazz guitarist...? Impressive to say the least. That ending is kickass! It gave me shivers.
Jazz guitarist? You flatter me. Growing up outside the traditional "band" framework, I never got the theory instruction necessary for to become a jazz guitarist in the strictest sense. All them 7th and demolished chords you heard were just left hand luck.
:shock: *bows* *not worthy*
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milothefultz
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Re: Review

Post by milothefultz »

sdurand wrote:
milothefultz wrote: Steve Durand - JAZZ. Did you write the horn line? This song is really really catchy! The instruments are miked exceptionally well, and I applaud you for that. The vocals sounded very unrehearsed and a bit frantic.
Yep. Wrote 'em and played 'em.

Maybe not unrehearsed but certainly the whole thing is underrehearsed. That's what happens when you only have a few hours to put the whole thing together.

Steve
I know what you mean, then. Either way, totally diggin' the song.
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Re: Review

Post by veGetar Ianra Ge »

milothefultz wrote: Vegetarian Rage - Tiny bit too much vocal reverb. Is that organ from a Casio? I honestly thought it was real until the solo! I hear a Spinal Tap single. Totally awesome guitar work! Hair metal is awesome.
Actually it's a Yamaha SY22 from the late 80's, it does alright. I'd love a real B3 but alas, I don't have any money. HELL YEAH HAIR METAL IS AWESOME! The Spinal Tap reference is the biggest complement anyone has given my music to date. I'm totally flattered.
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Post by veGetar Ianra Ge »

<b>BLT -</b> This song is rockin' but I really don't like it anyway. The intstrumental rules but the vocals are just too bland for me. You need Steve Tyler singing over this and you'll be good to go.

<b>DDD -</b> What's going on here? There is so much happening and it's all out of sync. The Glock rules pretty good but there is too much mud for me to get into this.

<b>Flvxxvm -</b> Very unexciting. Very. It gets much more listenable at the start of the first solo. I like this tone and your choice of notes. It feels Butthole Surfery. The trick to doin' it in the butt is just to go for it. Don't waste time with questions, you lose the element of surprise. Good weffort.. or effork take your pick.

<b>4 Zombz -</b> Thanks a lot for this.

<b>HBM -</b> Dude, it's "How much WILL you give me?" You can't just switch to the conditional tense and expect no one to notice. The vocals here are really muddy. I'm having trouble hearing your words at all. Either you recorded this on a twenty year old tape player with inconsistent tape speed, or you just figured out how to detune your keyboard and got excited. In either case, I recommend throwing all of your equipment away and starting your career over. Unexciting.

<b>JTH -</b> This is nice. I like the catchy guitar lick. You should have been a song writer in the 80's when this melodic style was more appreciated. Personally, I think this song is great. I really like your vocal perfomance... except for "ghost" and "close." Both of those phrase-enders are terrible. Nice 6/8 mid-section. It makes the scat breakbeat reentry much nicer.

<b>Klownhole -</b> This shit is kicking my ass. I love it. The guitars, the wailing distressed vocals. You guys are going to play at my wedding, maybe with Paco? This is heavy and well delivered. I can't even focus on the little things about the song on this first listen because it rules my ass so much. More to come on this i think...

<b>The LOO -</b> More electropop. I realize it only takes a few minutes to throw this together instrumentally so I can understand why it's such a popular style, but it just doesn't grab me like a real band, or an attempt at one. Even fake instruments being perfomed by real people comes off as more organic than this.

<b>MCEB -</b> This is great. GREAT. You are fantastic. You need a tad more flow on the rappin' but your lyrics are really on the spot. This is going into my collection for sure. Your best entry yet. I wish it were longer so I could bump and grind a little more.

<b>Melvin -</b> I'm not as impressed with this as your usual stuff. Good song regardless, I'm just not inspired to write a long review because my standards for you are too high now.

<b>Nunrapers & Rusted Dildo -</b> This is metal to the maxxx. Nice imagery in the name. Is this actually two artists or were you just aiming for the synergy between names there. Is that the word of our lord in there?

<b>OSAN -</b> I didn't like your intro section, before the vocals clear up. This is a well done song for sure, but I'm feeling like the styles conflict a lot. I get emo-angst from the chorus and metalpunker from the verse. The song isn't exciting but it sounds like you guys know what you're doing. The shouting part at 2 didn't agree with me either. Nice ending.

<b>Paco -</b> You're pretty consistently rockin' and i can appreciate that. The only part of your work that I don't get into is the vocal delivery. It sounds like you should be a lot more grungy asskicker and a lot less whiney. I <i> need</i> it, man. This song is not as extreme as the last one but still good. I love your bass tone again. Nice spacey wash vocals at 2:00 min. Ooooo yeah this is more like it. The quite vocals around 215. That's what this song says to me. That style. Good work here.

<b>Pigpen -</b> I actually like this.... oooo forget it these vocals are terrible. The beginning was nice. The rest of this is really draggy. Put some energy into this. The chorus is interesting. I don't know about that muffled high voice, I guess it adds to the effect.

<b>Puadxe -</b> Uh... I can't tell if the singing is killing this or if it's already dead and the singing is just attacking the carcass. I do like the feel of the chorus... and the fact that it's so short.

<b>Ross -</b> Nice guitar, sir. This is has a western feel to it which I like. The vocals at 1 min didn't really grab me. This isn't my favorite of your songs but I wouldn't be upset about it. Solid entry.

<b>Senza Valore -</b> Oooo i'm digging the instrumentation here. I don't know if you play a bunch of things or just did a good job of sampling but this is really keen. Nice melody. Very chill song. I particularly like the string riff. I started to get bored with the song about halfway through. It doesn't feel like it developes much. Even so, conceptually one of my favorite entries.

<b>Steve -</b> Yeah man! I can appreciate this for sure. Nice bop tune here. I wish more songfighter's could reach past the G&G alt-pop-rock genre and stretch into different styles. I don't think your vocals are really selling this song and the horns in the lead line are a little too dirty for my tastes, but then again i'm a jazz guy myself when i'm not on guitar so perhaps i'm too picky. Good job, you're a really creative guy.

<b>SBQ -</b> The mix is shit. It's a shame because this sounds like it would be a sweet song. Just put some compression on the fucking drums. Someone who's good at the music engineering side of all of this needs to write a howto for noobs on not making shitty recordings. (Melvin? Got any free time? I'd read it for sure.) On other accounts this is a good song. I like the concept, "How much will you give me... of this amount that you owe." clever chorus. Free metal ending? nonononononono! I could kill you for this.

<b>Veg -</b> I need some more balls in this I think. I also would have liked to do about thirty five thousand more takes on the verse vocals. I had trouble deciding on a good rhythm for the lyrics. I am really proud of myself on this solo, however. I can hack it on woodwinds, but my guitar shred is usually pretty sub-par. I knew organ wouldn't do for this tune though so I just stood in front of my full length mirror with a fan blowing in my face (to get in the mood) and started wailing. It was a great experience. I'll stop here so as not to ruin what everyone else has to say.

<b>Weakest Suit -</b> You've really picked a great name for yourself. This is a weak song. Weak vocals, weak delivery, weak lyrics. The guitar sounds like you are just learning how to play but maybe you practiced a lot and have these chords figured out. I don't want to listen to this ever again.

<b>The White Hat -</b> Your guitar kicks ass again. I need to invest more time in my guit-fiddlin'. OOOOOOO YES descending chromatic line! You come off as such a good songwriter because this is so innovative. You've taken G&G and made it so that i didn't even notice until the song was almost over. I like this vocal melody a lot, but I don't think your voice itself is appropriate. The falsetto near the end was out of place I think.
Haikus are easy
but they don't always make sense
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spinlock
Joan
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Location: England, UK

Post by spinlock »

The White Hat
Wow. I wish my left hand got lucky as often as yours. :P
You are an inspiration to my guitar playing. But enough about the guitar, this is good lyrically too, the 'free market...monopolise' line is great, but I can't make out the part of the chorus that sounds like "cagartoniyo body on my mind".. and the lyrics aren't in the archive. What is that part about?
Some of the guitar picking parts sound a little loose in places, but I can't tell if that's the style or just the overall speed. Maybe a touch slower would allow for tighter control on both that and the chorus lyrics?

The Weakest Suit
I really don't understand your introduction. It sounds like this song was bigger in your head, but you only included one guitar part, so the strange timing things don't come with the context they need. Still, it gets better towards the end, apart from the actual ending, which does the odd timing again. I really recommend you get hold of a sequencer or multitracker or keyboard or whatever it is you need to fill these songs out.

Veg
Intro: Darknessy. This is promising.
Verse: No. Vocals are all wrong for this. Too weak and too low. End result, sound like a 16yo emulating a 40yo. Would suggest growling, pitch shifting , or adding a whispered / spoken line instead. Even so, lots of potential here in what you're trying to do. Better to try and not quite make it than never do anything interesting.
Chorus: Awesome. Admittedly, I don't really get the lyrics, but organ/riff thing and the falsetto screaming are enough for me to really enjoy it. The solo is weak and repetitive in places, but isn't too bad.
Overall: Awesome with weak patches.
ic: I would give you (if I could afford it) a weekend with a pro singer and session guitarist.

Suburban Bear
Do your influences include Jack Black? I'm not a huge fan of his work, or yours. This is way too long and under-rehearsed. Did you forget to chop off the end before you submitted it? With a tighter performance, this would have held together well for about 1 1/2 minutes. And your solos sucked.
ic: I would give you one [short] opportunity to improve.

Steve Durand
Great song. Don't like the e-piano/vibes sound though. Creative lyrics. I'm keeping this.

Senza Valore
This is much better than the last one I heard. No clashing, real lyrics, some of them quite good. Your singing varies between relaxed and lethargic and monotonous with your singing delivery, but you mostly keep it up. Good. I wish you found a way to finish the song without fading out.

Ross Durand
I *really* like this song, apart from two things. The part that goes "and I guess I feel bad" - I can't make out the harmony at this point. Could be deliberate, but if it is, I don't really like it. And the first word 'like', which makes me think it's a metaphor, but then it seems to turn out you're actually talking about a tree the whole time. (Or have I missed a subtlety?)
Other than that, the imagery and story really appeal to me. Your voice is great for delivering those brutal lines like 'Before it's more than you can take'. The guitar playing is really pretty. I'm keeping this song, right next to your get a life entry.

puadxe
It sounded messy the first time through, but when I came back to it, it's actually got a lot of merit in it. I don't, however, dig the poor recording and mixing. Please work on that, as it's letting you down badly.

PigPen
Ok. I'm going to pretend the first three minutes don't exist. Right.
I actually like your chorus. And the last verse is not bad either. The measured atonality sounds rather threatening. I don't understand what purpose the muppet voice provides. Is the end supposed to be like a ransom tape finishing? That was a little bit weak.
Now for the rest of it:
Not good.

More later
MC Eric B
Lemmy
Posts: 292
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Post by MC Eric B »

Billy's Little Trip - I like the lyrics and vocals. Sounds a little too much like a garage band though, and that is not my type of music. But, the song is very very good for what it is. It just doesn't do anything to grab me into it.

Dublin Duck Dispensary - Not bad, but adding drums would have made it better.

Flvxxvm Florvm - I like the general sound of the song, but it gets boring after a while. The accent and vocals seemed to go well with the music.

Four Zombies and a Clown - Not a song.

Hello Blue Monday - Amateur recording, but the song has potential. I don't like the vocals, but maybe it would all sound better if the music was better recorded. Could be catchy if done right.

Jeff Travis Henderson - I like it. The song and vocals have a lot of variety which keeps it from getting boring.

Klownhole - Very good, but it would be better if I could hear the vocals.

Lord of Oats - I like the music part a lot. The vocals make the song sound like something I would hear on the Dr. Demento radio show, but I think that is what you were going for so that is good.

Melvin - Great song.

The None Rappers feat. Busted Libido - Pretty good.

Of Science and Numbers - I like the chorus a lot, but not the hard rocking parts as much. Vocals need more passion in the first half of the song. I like the way the song ends.

Paco del Stinko - Good music and good singing and good guitar work. I like part near the end where your voice gets real low.

PiGPEN - Intro reminds me a little of Madonna's Like A Virgin and is too long. The verse is boring since you repeat things over and over but the chorus is surprising well done. The whole things reminds me a little of a drug induced studio session, but it is good if you are into that type of thing.

puadxe - Music sounds somewhat unrehearsed but overall still a good song. I think it is just the horn that seems to be off actually.

ralph makes music - The instruments are good, but it does not all seem to come together very well, like maybe it was the first take and needed more to meld into a song. But, it has potential.

Ross Durand - Pleasant sounding, but nothing about it particularly grabs me.

Senza Valore - Good lounge music. Kind of depressing sounding vocals, like you found out your dog died and you have to go on stage and sing happy songs.

Steve Durand - I like this a lot. Has a big band type sound, like from a nightclub in the 1940's maybe.

Suburban Bear Quadrant - Great song. Vocals change a lot, which keeps it interesting.

veGetar Ianra Ge - Great rock song, especially the chorus part and the part leading up to the chorus.

The Weakest Suit - I thought this song was boring. Maybe it just needs more instruments to make it interesting. The last third of the song get better, but by then you might have lost many of the listeners.

The White Hat - Your voice matches the song very well and you are a good singer and guitar player.
Hello Blue Monday
A New Player
Posts: 4
Joined: Sat Sep 22, 2007 4:30 pm

Post by Hello Blue Monday »

jolly roger wrote: Up those vocals in the mix too. How can I be interested if I can't tell what you're saying?
yeah, about that. This was all recorded on one track at a really low bit rate. Sorry about that, but its all I had/have at this moment. I actually just ordered a basic 4 track recorder, so future song fight songs should have better quality/better instrumentation/some actual mixing.
ofscienceandnumbers
Pat
Posts: 26
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Post by ofscienceandnumbers »

Hat, Jolly, Milo, Rage, and Eric,

Thanks for the reviews. It looks like the biggest issue is the vocal passion. I will work on that, though My Darling Ruin has already been submitted.

Jolly and Rage, I think the fact that both of you used the words "you guys" in your reviews is among the biggest compliments I've yet received on my music. I appreciate that.

Steve Durand, I voted for you. I wasn't expecting to hear a swing song among all of the rock (including myself), electronic, and lo-fi stuff, but I quite liked it. Just tighten up the rhythms a bit. I'm going to go listen to some of your other entries now. Also, just curious: Is that all you, or did you play with a group?
Of Science and Numbers
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