Time to bear the Wrath of God's reviews

Discuss upcoming, current, and previous song fights.
Poor June
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Time to bear the Wrath of God's reviews

Post by Poor June »

sadly enough won't be in this fight... but still interested in seeing what all comes out of it \m/ my unfinished song is linked in the unified thread if you care to hear... if not... all cool...

best of luck
"You haven't been really bad in a long time." - jim of seattle

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Post by j$ »

If you stopped pimping your dr*** in every thread available, PJ, you might have had time to finish your song. And come up with an amusing title.

(edited to remove unneccessary value-judgement. I stand by everything else.)
Last edited by j$ on Mon Dec 13, 2004 12:52 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Poor June
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Post by Poor June »

i see how it is... nah usually it doesn't stop a thing... i did come up with something... but if you listen to the music you may understand...

i didn't see anything added to it as an improvement and scrapped all the ideas i came up with...
"You haven't been really bad in a long time." - jim of seattle

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johnsonic
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Psyched

Post by johnsonic »

Psyched for this one, my 2nd songfight.

Let'er rip!!!
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FEAR!

Post by Unit.M »

We're in on this one.
And we're looking forward to hearing the amusing descriptions of pain and distress caused by the assault on your ears.

I want adjectives people!
In under the skin, the fit is perfect
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Re: FEAR!

Post by Poor June »

Unit.M wrote:We're in on this one.
And we're looking forward to hearing the amusing descriptions of pain and distress caused by the assault on your ears.

I want adjectives people!
after that statement if you're not Death or Black Metal oriented i'm gonna be horribly disappointed :-(
"You haven't been really bad in a long time." - jim of seattle

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Re: FEAR!

Post by Freudian Slip »

Unit.M wrote:We're in on this one.
And we're looking forward to hearing the amusing descriptions of pain and distress caused by the assault on your ears.

I want adjectives people!
And Lo, I shall utter blasphemous oaths, ( and occasional nondescript adjectives) bringing down, upon my head, the Wrath of God, as the tortured resounding wails of HKD singnal the end of all creation, shaking the earth from its solid foundations, and tearing the heavens asunder.
(Or-- Something rather like that... hmmm... I think baby needs coffee.) :wink:
To Do Is To Be. --Socrates
To Be Is To Do. --Plato
DoBeDoBe, DoBeDo --Sinatra
I could 'see' you-- humming away (a few pill bottles on the sideboard)...But it just didn’t measure up to the insanity that is Freudian Slip...
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Post by blue »

deshead, your song is excellent.
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Post by deshead »

Woah, thanks blue!

Wish I'd gotten Pipe Fist's guitar tone ... Wow.
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Post by WeaselSlayer »

Hey everyone, my name's Luke and this is my first songfight that I've been in, but I've been here many a time before. I'm a little humbled because it sounds like people are generally putting out better work than they used to. I'm really diggin' Carlo and Level Nivelo and Deshead and I could go on. Anyway, I'll post some more complete reviews later, but just kind of wanted to say hey and howyadoo. Take care now.
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reviews

Post by johnsonic »

Brice Henry
- Not really my thing... the out of pitch vocals are getting to me. Also the hard panned guitar thin guitar thing. I think with better performance / production it could be a good story song.

pipefist
- Great nyyyyoooooooowahhhh guitar effect! Awesome guitar tone! Like the vocals. This chorus melody will get stuck in my head. Cool outro with the falling apart. A bridge may have been nice.

messiah
- This isn't my type of stuff. Vocals sound like Mike Patton on helium. I think I've heard the main riff somewhere before, but maybe that's because it's not my type of music.

Mediteraniem
- Holy Reverb. A little compression would have helped the vocal peaks. I'm losing interest in this song because I can't hear what's happening.

likely lads
- Good song! Production is a bit dry, drums a little too low / thin in my taste.

level nivelo
- Really don't like the vocals. Oh no, here it comes again.

john benjamin
- Nice lush piano. Vocals could have been a little lower in the chorus. Piano / drums have a good mix. Good song overall.

hentai kitty death
- Good song for this style. Drums are pretty thin though. Same with the scream.

deshead
- You rock. Awesome production. Great lyrics.

interactive electric nipple
- Think I may cut each part in half and see what happens :-=)

carlo
- it's pretty dry. Would like to hear some vocal harmony here and there.

fifteen years
- good production. Don't understand the thing about the dog, but if I thought hard enough I would make my sense of it, and that's art.

wreckdom
- Okay?

Luke Henly
- I wish I could whistle :)... There's music under that whistle! Bring it up a bit... This could sound better with better mixing...


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Post by jack »

blue wrote:deshead, your song is excellent.
i totally agree. man, that is some serious fingerpicking. awesome. at one point, i was thinking "man, if this just had some fiddle..." and then you bring it in. really top notch stuff all around. impressive indeed.
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Re: reviews

Post by WeaselSlayer »

johnsonic wrote:Luke Henly
- I wish I could whistle :)... There's music under that whistle! Bring it up a bit... This could sound better with better mixing.
Heh, well I work with what I have. I honestly didn't take too much time worrying about the mix, thanks for the tip.
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Post by PipeFist »

pipefist
- Great nyyyyoooooooowahhhh guitar effect! Awesome guitar tone! Like the vocals. This chorus melody will get stuck in my head. Cool outro with the falling apart. A bridge may have been nice.
Thanks, glad you enjoyed it. But there was actually a bridge, it's where it goes "He's never gonna shop here again...etc"

But maybe it wasn't defined enough. I'm glad you like the vocals, because I sure don't. But I always hate my voice.
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Post by johnsonic »

"But maybe it wasn't defined enough. I'm glad you like the vocals, because I sure don't. But I always hate my voice."

Anyhoo... me neither, that's the coolest thing about doing it. :)

ROK.
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Post by Fried »

Carlo: Pretty standard Christian music. I get no emotion from this at all. Grade C
Deshead: Great guitar riffs. I love the music. I am not big on your vocals in this song. The grungy parts feel forced. I love the multitude of instruments. Very good song. Grade B+.
Fifteen Years: I like the Evanescence feel. Beautiful voice. I am getting bored though. Piano break came just in time. The music changes but I need a change in vocals for this to be excellent. Grade A-
Hentai Kitty Death:
Interactive Electric Nipple: That was really cool. It might even vote for it if this was album fight.. heh. Tooo looong. Everything about it otherwise is great. Grade A
The John Benjamin Band: Lots of Pianist around here. I won't hold that against you. The break is a nice attempt to distract me from the fact that this is music by numbers. Not a great fan of this song. Vocals are nice, piano is nice ect... grade C
Level Nivelo: The low end on that piano sound is not good. I like the arrangement. I like the lyrics. The vocals are way to far forward. Fun and I love the ideas in here. The rapping is bad and the timing on the vocals is not very good. I still like this. Grade B+
The Likely Lads: Bring the rock! The vocals need to be .. thicker. Actually everything needs to be thicker. I believe it is called reverb. Different mix and this would be a good Beastie Boys song. Grade B+
Luke Henley: hmmm... intro is bad. It doesn't get any better. Grade C-
Mediteraniem: Too much reverb. The song is pretty good, that riff sounds familiar. Better production to get the song across better please. Grade B.
Me$$iah: Nice intro. Vocals... ummm... The drums sound great. The guitar sounds good. The Vocals are ummmm... nice break, but no lead? Lyrically not bad. The vocals have ummmm... I like the ending. Grade B-
Pipe Fist: I hate phasing sounds. A little too much effort on the bouncing sounds. Vocals are good. The whole sound is confused. I bet there is a really good song in there somewhere. Grade B-
WreckdoM: Who would have thunk it. A Doo Whop song. Love the new vocals. A bit of clipping but overall just long enough. Grade C+


Interactive Electric Nipple led the class.
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Post by Me$$iah »

HI Y'all

yay my first post,

i didnt wanna say nothin till Id at least put sumthing in,

thank you for the reviews so far, mine will come,
I just like a little time to digest. Some good songs there
on first listen: Deshead you rock cept im sure thats my fiddle player
Wreckdom I love it

fuller reviews to follow

Bout mine Im sorry about the vocals and the lack of a lead
but for sum reason i thought that i had a whole day more to finish
then it hit me OH NO it is Monday

so i sent it guide vox line and no solo an all


right ,
Ive done it lost my songfight virginity completly song in and a post

feels good
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wrath of god reviews

Post by Carlobarlo »

I'll try a few reviews, and a few at a time:

Fifteen Years
sounds good, a little bit scary. From the lyrics, I'm guessing this is Christian music. But then I've been accused of writing christian music as well

deshead
I think it's a strong song, and the lyrics seem deep enough to make me want to listen again. The guitar playing is great as is the recording, but I don't like the gravely voice

Luke Henley
Scary whistling at first. it's all a bit too loose and messy for me. I feel like the songwriter hears more of the song than has been recorded.

Level Nivelo
The voice needs to be more mixed with the rest. Also the intention is not entirely clear, but maybe I need to listen again. I like the fuck the rainbow line

mediteraniem
I like the echoe feel of this. Sounds like you used acoustic mirror or something. I also generally like the mood of this song a lot. It's a petty the voice is muffled, I can't hear the lyrics well. This is a possible vote


Hentai k D
freaky beginning. This is not my thing at all, mostly because of the style. I also don't hear a mix-the synth snare is too quiet.

John Benjamin band
I like this ok. I think the voices come in a bit too loud sometimes. I find the double vocals a bit too warm/cozy. It all sounds a bit too homey.

Brice Henry and the transformers
wow, sing half a step higher! The song stands, but the vocals are really painful. I may have missed something, but I'm not sure how this is linked to the title

Carlo
me


Wreckdom
nothing interesting here for me

The Likely Lads
The opening is surprising-it makes you sit up and wonder what the hell this is about. Pretty standard rock, I guess.

messiah
Sounds like 'a forest' by the Cure at the beginning. Voice a bit quiet.

Pipe Fist
I think this is very good. The build-up is craftily done, I'm getting into it. The voice is interesting, personal. The composition of all the instruments (unusual ones) works really well, not your standard 'band' I wonder if this is one person or more. I'm impressed overall. Some of the lyrics seem a bit rushed. What's everyone talking about at the end?

Interactive electric nipple
Another crafty build-up. I like the use of kitchen sounds. How did you do this in one week? Great mood music.

top songs for me are interactive electric nipple, pipe fist, mediteraniem. My vote goes to Mediteraniem.
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Post by PipeFist »

The composition of all the instruments (unusual ones) works really well, not your standard 'band' I wonder if this is one person or more. I'm impressed overall. Some of the lyrics seem a bit rushed. What's everyone talking about at the end?

Mostly two guys and a friend of the guy doing the mixing helping out with more mixing. Also, as for the end, I for some reason thought it would be amusing to throw in some guy yelling at an employee somewhere, which is basically what the song is about. I would've taken it out if any of the people I showed it to didn't like it, but nobody would be honest enough to tell me it was stupid, so there you go!

Anyway, I think I'll stop responding to every little thing about my song, nd work on downloading these songs to review them. Dial-up sucks.
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Re: wrath of god reviews

Post by johnsonic »

[quote="Carlobarlo"]
[b]Interactive electric nipple[/b]
How did you do this in one week?
[/quote]

Lots of coffee and a flexible job! :-)
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Post by Mostess »

Roughly in order of preference. Vote goes to Likely Lads, Deshead, or JBB depending on which gets me coming back for more tomorrow.

Likeley Lads: You have it! Easily the most precious gem of the lot; still very rough, but you can see the myriad ways of cutting it, and it would obviously shine brightly no matter what. Your ending could have gone on longer and I would have joined in, but I thank you for letting me go after 2:10. Great chorus. Kill the guitar solo (or move it to the end while you repeat your coda over and over and over) write me another verse (and watch that prosidy while you're at it---I know the rockers don't care, but it's why your second verse sounds so much better than your first). Seriously, a great song here.

Deshead: Damned good energy and smooth sound. Good "Crash Test Dummies" vibe---heartfelt, authentic, but pop-y, controlled, and clean. I like the avoidance of the final cadence. A decent song. Could use a quirky chord change or a catchy descant to make it stand out; kind of plain as is. A graceful performance, top notch, not stellar.

John Benjamin Band: I'm usually a sucker for major 7ths, but they sound out of place in your verse; not sure why. I really like the form of this; the hocket between solo and harmony vocals is churchy, but not formal. The bridge is wide and sweet, though I'd like it longer and to stray more from home. I'd delete the empty spaces in the middle and at the end (what is bugging me about that piano part?), but I wouldn't touch much else. Great entry.

Interactive Electric Nipple: Tighten your structure and value my time and I will love you. I really like the sound of this; very slick. I love the initial melody (especially the beat before the end of the main phrase: "beneath my...feet") and the conga percussion. The starting "doing dishes" sounds are cheesy and unwelcome. Delete the first :45 seconds, maybe even the first :60 and jump right into the verse. In general, your use of space is indulgent and weak. No architecture, just slick repetition. Like a Walmart---nice enough, and pretty effective, but damned near detestable in practice. By 3:00, I've given up on hearing a song; too soon for your jazz-y "interlude" (actually, a B-section where the song should have been finished for :20!) to be effective.

Pipe Fist: Lovely voice, interesting sounds. Bridge adds no distinction, fails to bridge anything. Form is loose and nothing changes quickly enough. Pull instruments out and bring them back to give the song more definition. The last :45 are self-indulgent, uninteresting and weak; no excuse in a 4:08 song.

WreckdoM: Okay, I'm warming up to you. And I appreciate your existance and your contribution to SongFight! I'm still not quite sure what you get out of this forum, but that's apparantly for you to know and for me to ponder. I usually half-listen to your entries but this one was short enough for me to consider.

Fifteen Years: Too hypnotic for me. Lots of space, and little to fill it. Sweet if you're patient; dull if you're me. I like the breakdown around 2:45, and the religious overtones, but the general gist is elusive. And you forgot to write an ending.

Level Nivelo: The overly-loud, uncommitted vocals and sloppy lyrics ("I don't trust your priests anymore"? Is that your best shot?), and half-assed rap make this sound like a joke. But it's not funny. So I'm left cold. The radio-sounding background loops toward the end are creepy and cool, and the end has some spunk. But I really dislike this overall.

Carlo: 2x2x2x2x2... Very square. But it's hip to be square, eh? Seriously, what's up with the Huey Lewis cover? This has no passion or joy; it seems like a happy song making a bold statement, but you sound bored and limp. The lyrics are trite, and the form is unorignial. I liked this for the first :20 or so, but you let me down.

Brice Henry: The collapse before 2:00 is the best moment of the song (though somewhat sophmoric). You should have ended it there, or at least come back somewhat affected by that (change something!). I hate to be a vocal snob, but you and your background singer need to switch places. I don't like the idea, and the actual song leaves me cold; hard to say why exactly. I don't think it's your performance, but it's hard to see past. ("ACT station"? "Frasier...Cheers"? Poor choices, I think.)

Mediteranem: I like to place the mics in the same room as me when I record. Okay, that was snarky, but you sound very soft and distant. I think that's because of the huge reverb and the small volume level. The song doesn't have much to recommend it. Melody is flat, guitar is monotonous. That's it. Lose the guitar solo bit from 2:24 to 3:03 or so. You lost me there. Pity because your voice has a nice flavor to it when you pick it up towards the end, but then you stop. The last 10 seconds are the sweetest: do that more.

Hentai Kitty Death: This sucks. No heart, no passion, no reason, hardly anything to listen to. I like the pianoish guitar part and the solo has some lovely melodic moments, but they're nothing special. Try divorcing your melody from your chord progression; it's too parallel. Try adding a second voice. The song sounds like a commanding, ominous voice, but your performance sounds like a morose teenager. Delete the last minute and a half and you'll gain some points.

Me$$iah: I expected this entry from the title (actually, I expected about 10 of these). Needs more rehearsal, obviously, but even more it needs a lot of polishing. Bass, guitar, vocals, and drums are all doing the same thing. Drum fills are the only thing changing from phrase to phrase, and even they seem static somehow. What's up with the vocal arhythmia in the chorus? Intentional? Style choice? Or sloppy?
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Post by WeaselSlayer »

I'm not trying to be a bother, but you kinda skipped me. I only bring it up because you have really solid comments, and I'm always hungry for feedback. If this sounds annoying um, it probably is and I'm sorry.
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